frigidxfate

[frigidxfate]

thedarkempath:

the internal fight inside her was strong, tugging her heart down to her stomach.

 part of her just wanted to yell at him- scream until there was nothing left to say, until her voice was raw from anything and everything that had ever crossed her mind since he’d left.

another part of her, the more prominent one, wanted to drop to her knees, letting out the emotions she’d kept bottled up before reaching for him to kiss him- kiss him and never let him go.

because even after all that- she knew that she loved him. it wasn’t even a question, really.

it’s only then she realizes her attire, and she tugs nervously at the sleeves before taking a half step towards him, slow and steady. she wasn’t sure why he was even there- who’s to say he wanted her to great him like she wanted to?

“What—- What’re you doing here….?”

it was like an agonizing burn, her distance. not being able to figure out if it was because she wanted to keep that distance, or because she thought that he was the one that wanted her to keep it. there were enough nightmares in his thoughts of that very same situation, the pull of desire ultimately clashing with the dread of insecurity.

where he'd return and all she'd want was for him to stay as far away as humanly possible.

“  i needed to see you, rae. ”

sharp intake of breath mixed with nervous fidgeting, mixed with uneasy looks & desperate fingers eager to step forth and embrace rachel. in that situation, words were not enough to convey his emotions but words were all that he HAD, they were what he needed to convince rachel---- to just take him BACK.

” needed to make sure that you were alive, that you were still okay. ”

it was no longer a desire, somewhere in the time they'd spent apart a basic necessity to ensure that raven was alright had nestled itself somewhere deep between the assassin's ribs. he did not want, he NEEDED to know that she could survive; that he had not ruined her in any way.

[frigidxfate]

the wait isn't a long one for the assassin. it takes five full minutes for him to think of the benefits of leaving before she can awake, another two to think about how he was stupid enough to leave her in the first place--- and another four to get rid of all of those thoughts completely; bucky barnes was never one to back down, and no matter how much time had passed rachel deserved an explanation, even... even if she DIDN'T love him anymore.

so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't notice her, his face covered by his hand as the other tapped nervously on his knee, until she's THERE & he's SPEECHLESS. it was a painful wait, but the second that her words reached his ears there was no denying that something in his body stopped because it felt like he could not breath, all of his thoughts were gone & the only thing he could do was sit up and glance at her in remorse with the same eyes that had once only looked at her with longing.

carefully trained eyes, however, notice what his mind does not immediately pick up on. a sweatshirt that undoubtedly belongs to him, the expression on her face, the way she stands as she sees him for the first time in--- it's pathetic how he can't even remember how long it's been. to him, it feels like it's been centuries; far too long.

“ Rachel, I'm------ ”

as he'd expected, he doesn't know how to speak, already on his feet and LONGING to step forward & wrap his arms around her like he'd learned to do so often before, when they could trust that the other would not leave, before he'd screwed it all up so badly.

she remembers the way his jaw feels against her fingers as the brush against it, the way his hair looked when the two of them woke up in the morning. how he could smile and it would leave a warmth in her heart for the rest of the day.

she also remembers the way her whole world fell apart when he left- a feeling a helplessness so large she hadn’t felt it since living with her father. the way she went through each and ever possible reason for him to leave, most of them landing on something she figured was of her own fault. the way she fell asleep thinking what she did wrong

but most thoughts spun around the inevitable- how much she loves him- even now, as she squeezes her eyes shut against the light of a new day shining through the windows

even now, when she sees his sweatshirt in the laundry because she keeps wearing it to bed in hopes it’ll bring him back

even now, as she wears that same sweatshirt, walking into a living room of an apartment she once called their own, locking eyes with the man in question before freezing in shock.

“B—- Bucky?”

[frigidxfate]

                                  for : thedarkempath

he remembered the curve of her lips, surprisingly soft against the harsh corners of his own. his fingers oh so carefully enter wined with her own, not because he had to be gentle but because he wanted this; wanted just to have her, the only part of his messed up brain that seemed to make sense.

more importantly, he remembered leaving her.

a choice, yet a difficult one to make nonetheless. when Hydra was gone but enough of them remained to want him back, that he had to make sure they couldn't hurt her--- & STAYING AWAY, after he was sure because he wasn't good to her if he was nothing more than a shadow of the person that he'd been seventy years ago, a person that had been BEATEN out of him, BURNED, TORTURED, TAKEN AWAY.

it all came rushing back in an instant when he had nothing to think about but that very real knowledge, sitting on a couch that seemed foreign & familiar to him all at once; a place he hadn't been to in god knows how long. he was home, because in the end that is what Rachel was to him.

she was his home, & he didn't have anyway of telling her this when she's was in the other room; in the early hours of the day. sleeping because he was too much of a COWARD to wake her up with words he couldn't even make up, because he didn't know how to say it---

I'm back, I'm sorry I left, I love you and that's the only thing I'm sure about right now, I want to kiss you until we're both out of breath because when I'm with you it's the only time I don't feel like I'm a mess on two legs, I want to stay with you.

[frigidxfate]

-- ( thedarkempath )

[frigidxfate]

cover officially blown

are you telling me you are both of thos blogs

[frigidxfate]

[frigidxfate]

"Come here."

"No."

[frigidxfate]

"Yeah, I... kind of figured that out for myself."

"Are you okay?"

"Buck—?

                     —Bucky.”

"I didn’t know it was you, I— I’m sorry I had a — a nightmare, and I— I—"

[frigidxfate]

"Okay, just---- just calm down."

"Let go of me—!"

[frigidxfate]

     ⊰ ★ ⊱—;;    He sucked in a sharp breath, not sure what else there was to say. Stevie was here and she wasn't... Stevie anymore, but she was? After everything he'd been through, seeing Stevie as she was now seemed like the least of his problems. It was a blessing to have her back and that was all that mattered.

     Except.

     "You know, I actually have a lot of questions." He spoke up softly, knowing he must have looked horrible and having no qualms about it  But he didn't voice the questions, not when he realized that Stevie probably had no idea where she was going ---- she hadn't been there as long as he had, hadn't memorized what he could before he'd been dragged off for experimentation.

     He winced, but unlike Stevie well, Bucky had a general idea of where they were going. "Take---- take a right, then just keep going straight." There was a pause before he opened his mouth again, "I still can't believe you're real."

I'll Always Find You [Stevie&Bucky]

[frigidxfate]

    ⊰ ★ ⊱—;;   "It's not ketchup,    if that's what you wanted to know." 

  “Is that ketchup or..blood…?”

[frigidxfate]

      ⊰ ★ ⊱—;;  ❝Ever heard of too much information?❞  

      [ That definitely makes her hesitate.       She doesn't care much for Wanda,     but the woman really just won't die.     Letting her live is worth thinking about,   even if it's only for a mili-second. ]

                ❝How do I know you won't just cause more problems?❞

                              [ And by that what she really means is,                                 How do I know you won't rat me out?                              If they thought she was loosing her touch                             there was no saying what Hydra would do. ]

open rp || вecĸy & wanda

[frigidxfate]

⊰ ★ ⊱—;; ❝You're gambling with the best, sweetheart.      And that's exactly why you're going to end up losing here.❞

                         [ His hand slides up her slender waist,                           fingers curled delicately over her hip                             as he tugs her closer towards him.  ] 

❝That... sounds like an invitation.❞

"Make me." ((becauseannaisalittleshit))

⊰ ★ ⊱—;; ❝Are you sure you want that?     Good killers don’t just know how to deliver pain.           They also know how to deliver pleasure if needed.❞

                         [ There was a smirk on his lips,                          eyes glued to hers as they stood                           inches apart from each other. ] 

❝I could make you———     Or you could save me the trouble.           Your call, I suggest you chose wisely.❞

[frigidxfate]

⊰ ★ ⊱—;; ❝Oh, come on, Rae.        I'm not even remotely wasted.❞

"An argument could be made for 15." //huehuehue whoops

"You’re serious right? A fifteen? That shot clearly deserved a twenty."

[frigidxfate]

⊰ ★ ⊱—;; ❝Don't bother, I'll be fine soon.       I... think. This... this is actually my third bottle.❞

"An argument could be made for 15." //huehuehue whoops

"You’re serious right? A fifteen? That shot clearly deserved a twenty."

[frigidxfate]

⊰ ★ ⊱—;; ❝Eh, I'm Russian at heart.       я пью является наименее их забот.❞

"An argument could be made for 15." //huehuehue whoops

"You’re serious right? A fifteen? That shot clearly deserved a twenty."

[frigidxfate]

⊰ ★ ⊱—;; ❝There's a lot of things I'm not 'supposed' to do.       Talking to you is one of them. Remembering is another one.             But from what I do remember, I didn't like the name too much.                  James Buchanan Barnes. I think they just called me Bucky.❞

"An argument could be made for 15." //huehuehue whoops

"You’re serious right? A fifteen? That shot clearly deserved a twenty."