freshlypickedmint

[freshlypickedmint]

@devon-usher

Me: *looking at a porcelain hand in the home decor aisle of a store* if I lost my hands in some kind of tragic accident, I’d decorate my entire home with hand-shaped things. Then I’d invite guests over for like, dinner parties and such and sit there expectantly just basking in their discomfort.

My boyfriend: Do you hear what you say when you talk? Do you know what you just said to me?

[freshlypickedmint]

openin’ the door to the microwave one second early because you don’t need all the hootin’ and hollerin’

[freshlypickedmint]

emperor kuzco was clearly gay

[freshlypickedmint]

emperor kuzco was clearly gay

[freshlypickedmint]

Moooola!

[freshlypickedmint]

[freshlypickedmint]

so strange to me that some people aren't bisexual

[freshlypickedmint]

Everyone should know the international sign for Help Me. Let’s make this famous!!

[freshlypickedmint]

"I don't want to read this" is totally valid.

"This is disgusting to me" is totally valid.

"I don't want to read this because it is disgusting to me" is totally valid.

"I don't think anyone should be allowed to read or write this because it is disgusting to me" is authoritarian.

[freshlypickedmint]

rice is the perfect food and westerners should eat more of it i'm so serious

[freshlypickedmint]

I'm literally begging you, please be weird and queer, online and offline if you can, I want you to live life being as fascinating as possible

you'll only be alive for so long, please spend some time being odd

[freshlypickedmint]

kill the shift manager in your brain

[freshlypickedmint]

[freshlypickedmint]

@wind-rider

rip mythbusters you would've loved destroying cybertrucks

[freshlypickedmint]

babe. I know we’re all going thru a lot rn but I just wanna give u the heads up that sesame streets future is in jeopardy. hbo has chosen not to renew it for new episodes (a series that has been going since 1969) and the residents of 123 Sesame Street no longer have a home :(

[freshlypickedmint]

Things they don't tell you about being a first time wheelchair user in highschool

Literally everyone will ask if you broke your leg(s). Everyone. Even people you don’t know. Theyll ask a lot and think you’re extremely fragile.

bruises show up within the first day of rolling around, and they can really suck

people will try to grab your chair if they think you’re struggling and it can be hard not to snap at them for it

static electricity is a huge issue. You will probably either continuously shock your leg when you’re rolling around or do what I did today and zap someone so hard as you pass that both of you nearly keel over

people will call you out as a faker if you do anything even remotely fun ever on your wheelchair. Wheelies? Obviously your legs are fine lol not like you have to go down fucking curbs /s

puddles are the worst and if there’s a curb with a puddle all around and you have some ability to walk its a better idea to just stand up and navigate the chair than to fall backwards into said puddle

weird looks from people are inevitable, especially from people who don’t like you

bus drivers will often push your chair and give you advise you don’t want to hear, even if you tell them nicely you can push yourself. Its really hard not to get mad at them for it

no wheelies in school. Though if you do it in the elevator when no one else is with you you can’t really get caught.

speaking of wheelies, always be ready to throw at least one arm behind you in case you fall. They say tuck your chin in but its easier and more reliable to throw your hands back and keep your neck up so you don’t hit the floor. Sore arms are way easier to put up with than head injuries

don’t even bother to try and roll back up curbs. You will either be there for an hour or fall backwards. I managed to do both.

90% of classrooms that aren’t special ed are not very wheelchair accessible.

people will automatically assume you’re faking something if you’re not considered dumb enough in their standards to fit in with disabled students (aka high class ableism at its finest)

people are going to give you weird looks if you don’t suddenly start sitting with the other disabled kids

standard backpacks usually dangle way too much to keep on you easily, so try to pack light

built in storage on wheelchairs cannot sufficiently carry books

don’t try to hold an umbrella. Period. Especially not with your teeth. It doesn’t work.

don’t try to give the bus driver your ticket while you’re stuck on the ramp. And speaking of, its easy to start falling down the bus ramp so be careful, and when in doubt throw on the breaks

and finally if you’re like me pray to god you don’t go nonverbal when someone is trying to push you and you don’t want them to because it is hard to get them to stop if you can’t speak

able-bodied people can and should 1000% reblog this, some of these things I’ve seen on tips about using a wheelchair but a lot of these weren’t things I’ve seen