fomagranfalloon

[fomagranfalloon]

I see I will need to revisit my Sam Coe phase

for angst prompts - ❛ don’t act like you know me.' for Sloane/Adam ❛ i can’t do this without you. ❜ for Sam/Cait

Here's the answer for the Sam/Cait prompt...

tagging: @bearlytolerant, @silurisanguine, @aro-pancake, @fangbangerghoul, @atonalginger, @aislingdmdt, @fshenkoescape, @ninjaofnaps, @lisa-and-shadow, @a-cosmic-elf, @thatsgoodsquishy0, @hockeydemon42, @fomagranfalloon, @violenceandviolets, @therealgchu, @staticpallour, @artemis-crimson, @genesisarclite and @constellation2330

For context, this follows on from https://www.tumblr.com/eridanidreams/780405060022730752/wip-wednesday

Sam stared down at the note on his console, re-reading it for the umpteenth time.

…I'm so sorry.

He touched the faint wrinkled spot next to the words; she'd been crying.

I've started this over at least half a dozen times, trying to find the right words. But there are no right words, so I'm just going to have to do my best with the ones I've got.

It wasn't your fault. Please believe that. I keep seeing it in my head, and all I can imagine is the kind of monster I must have seemed. I never blamed you for being frightened. I blame myself for frightening you. For hurting you.

"Wasn't your fault either, Cait," he said to the empty air. "I know who to blame. An' I'm gonna feed him his own intestines, one centimeter at a time."

Andreja keeps telling me it wasn't my fault, but I have trouble believing that. I keep thinking, if I'd just been a little stronger, held out a little longer. But I wasn't. And I didn't.

I know I'm not thinking straight. And I'm terrified—terrified that I'm making the wrong decision, terrified that I'm hurting you more. I can't trust myself. All I can do is hope that the people that I do trust are pointing me in the right direction. Since they're people you trust, too, it's probably a safe bet.

Bits of the next few sentences showed salt-shimmering spatters where more tears had splashed on half-dried ink.

Andreja told me you're recovering. That you've gotten help. That's good. In all this mess, it's one bit of good that I can hold onto. You should know that I'm getting help, too. I have to do something—I keep seeing M's head in my nightmares. I keep hearing those words, though I can never remember them. The echoes that I do remember make me sick.

I am very very tired of the minefields in my head.

I miss you and Cora more than I can say. I want you here so badly. I just can't be around people right now. I need to focus on my own problems without the stress of blocking other people's emotions out. And you already know you're the hardest one to keep out.

"I understand," he told the silent piece of paper. "I hate it, but I understand."

Sam, you told me not all that long ago that if I couldn't believe in myself, you'd do it for me. I know I shouldn't even ask, I've already put you through so much, but please, I need you to do it for me. I can't do this without you.

"And you don't have to, darlin'," he murmured. "Not as long as I have something to say about it."

I love you.

"I love you too," he said. "And we're not going to let that son of an ashta win."

[fomagranfalloon]

I once heard a woman in Austria who sounded so similar to Cassandra that before I could think about it, I turned around and expected to see Cassandra there. (Spoiler alert, no a fictional video game character was not standing there waiting for the U-bahn.)

That accent would have been doable for the Nevarrans! There are people out there who already sound damn close!

I have a bone to pick with the accents in Veilguard as a whole. The Dalish, the Qunari...sigh.

the language nerd in me is fucking screaming and crying about the fact that Cassandra Pentaghast has what i believe may be the most accurate impression of the extinct gothic germanic accent we have, and the fact that they didn't even try to give anyone else from Nevarra the same accent is fucking criminal

yes i know it is an entirely made up accent that miranda developed herself, she unintentionally hit the nail on the fucking head with the accent of a dead language that would even be lore accurate with the placement of Nevarra relative to orlais and the other neighboring countries

also im sorry using Gothic as the language inspiration for nevarran??? is that not like too fucking perfect??

like yeh i get it accent training people for a fake accent is ridiculously hard

i do not care

give me gothic nevarrans in the truest sense of the word

i might post the notes find the notes here i have on the actual linguistic comparisons if anyone cares because i studied her pronunciation to compare to historical texts when i made the connection

[fomagranfalloon]

I really think a lot about their crossover

[fomagranfalloon]

Local envoy has a crush. There's no reason for this man to have such an attractive voice. (Garrus my space husband I'm so happy you are back)

[fomagranfalloon]

if YOU'RE having sex at work, and I'M having sex at work, WHO IS REFINING THE MACRODATA?

[fomagranfalloon]

Yesterday I had the opportunity to talk to Gareth David-Lloyd (Solas' voice actor) during a Swedish convention. Here's some of the things he said about his work on Dragon Age (that I remember!)

He's not entirely happy with the writing of The Veilguard. "But that's what happens when there's too many cooks" (paraphrasing) and when all the original people disappear from the project (like the layoffs). He said something about how when passing on the project to other people (writers) there's sure to be some lost information or different interpretations.

He didn't know more about Solas than the player did during Inquisition. He just thought Solas was a mysterious companion that disappeared. He only learned more when he got the script for Trespasser (and his reaction to getting all the info from Trespasser was "this is awesome")

I asked how he prepared for the role of Solas the first time he got the role, compared to when he came back for The Veilguard, and one thing he did for The Veilguard was just to play Inquisition several times (which ofc he "had the time for since it took years for The Veilguard to come out" (paraphrasing)). The third time he played Inquisition he romanced Solas, which was "a fun experience".

He hasn't finished playing The Veilguard because he's playing on his son's ps5 and doesn't always have the opportunity to play. He received a free code for the game, but for pc, and he doesn't have a gaming pc (if I recall correctly).

Solas' performance was first done with motion capture, which David-Lloyd said he would've loved to have done himself. Mainly because he originally had to match his voice acting to that of the mo-cap actor's performance (like dubbing), which of course limited his own performance. But in the end he performed the lines in his own way, which he felt was best for the final product, and was more happy with the result. The animations then had to be altered to fit David-Lloyd's performance instead.

[fomagranfalloon]

[fomagranfalloon]

Moment of solace

[fomagranfalloon]

There are a LOT of things I like about Avowed. How they go all-in on lore verbiage and don't feel the need to dumb it down for people new to the series (like me.) How the side-quests feel meaningful. How reactive companion banter makes exploring the maps rewarding even in areas without a mission. (Honestly Avowed is the first open world game I've played in yeeeears that has made exploration fun.) How gleefully they lean into certain fantasy RPG tropes that it makes it feel like coming home, even though it's brand new.

But my number 1 thing I love about Avowed is the thing that got me to buy the game in the first place - running around with my ride or die Garrus Vakarian Kai and getting to hear his thoughts and jokes everywhere we went. The casual bet. His dynamic with Marius. That *vest*. Yes of course I loved the more serious stuff with his backstory and how he reacts to your choice of siding between Lodwyn or Ryngrim. But it's the *silly* and the joy I'm loving the most.

Maybe it's because post-Veilguard, I'm coming out of my 10-year Solas hangover. But I'm enjoying an RPG relationship that is high on fun and maybe not so high on angsty yearning for a change.

Reminds me of a certain Space Boyfriend I once had. Just like the good old days.

[fomagranfalloon]

I don't go here and I don't know who these people are but this is nice

oh man i just can’t. liam wiping matt’s tears off his face, matt closing his eyes when hugging him- them pulling eachother closer. jesus man

[fomagranfalloon]

the eldest boy loses again

[fomagranfalloon]

Learning how Tama died and what it felt like for Kai really recontextualises the scene in the healer's where he's watching over the dead Envoy. He lost his leader and had to watch them slowly die (I do not blame him for walking away) and then, just after he starts following the Envoy and begins opening up again, he sees you shot and you literally die from poison in his arms. In that time gap before your resurrection, the emotions he must have been feeling would have been agonising. The guilt over having lost another leader like that again. Thinking back to the look he gives you when you rise up, it's like being hit by a freight train of emotion.

[fomagranfalloon]

Me, every time Kai waxes poetic about the views around the Living Lands: Ah, so you did get to retire to somewhere warm and tropical.

[fomagranfalloon]

[fomagranfalloon]

shout out to everyone who participated in the january-february mass depressive episode

[fomagranfalloon]

David Tennant prepares to host One BAFTA More...