fitz-parks

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Practice

Analyzing

Triggering

Issues

Enabling

Naturally

Controllable

Emotions

🤔🤫

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"He's gone."

"Yeah, and?"

"You don't care that he left?"

"People leaving isn't anything new for me."

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Day 4 and this journal has become one of the best, stress relieving, mind clearing parts of my day. The day have gotten better each day and I focus on my health and improvement as a human being. I can tell that my awareness of my mind and body is prevalent. 📔 ✍️

One of the sections In todays session ask me to finish this phrase as many times as I can, regarding how I feel about myself truthfully.

I Am _______? 🤔

Come to find out…there were more negative answers than I expected. BUT I think that I’m seeing growth in that result. Ask me to answer the question a month ago it would have been all about how great at this, great at that I was. That’s that inside voice that drives me everyday. I want to be good at everything I touch. I don’t want to lose, and expect those around me to have that same approach. That self motivation voice has drowning out those insecurities, stresses, and traumas that I’ve been able to deal with over the past week. Im proud to be able to tie myself to those stresses and traumas regarding a question of WHO am I. It’s fine to admit to myself that those areas don’t define me but are parts that make up WHO I AM.

If you stumble upon this and and any of my recent submissions, just pray for me. Whether we know one another or not, take a moment give some some encouragement. Being vulnerable to people is easier than me being vulnerable with myself. One things for sure writing has given me a peace that I’ve missed and haven’t had I long time. 🌓

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Time to explore and create on the fly starting now…..

What IF?

There’s a piece of me that says what if

What if I’m not leading correctly

Expectations existing way before

I understood that a role I was forced to play

Wasn’t fit for a boy

What if that boy failed to enjoy moments and events

For what they actually were

And not for what he had to make them

Never saying no, never letting go

Failing to focus on himself fully, how truly

It can be said that the heart can be the

biggest enemy sometimes

That enemy loves the the phrase what if?

What if I find no one else

What if my family always needs me

Believe me, the heart beats hard

Loud enough to make you open the door

To an unlimited number of what ifs

BUT what if those moments helped

You become who you Are today.

What if the growth was nourished and impacted by a tough, heavy, and steady flow of heart break, mistakes, protection, and projection?

Heart Scarred with a mind ajar, the walk seems far

But what if at the end you find who you really are.

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I have to remind myself that just because someone reaches out to me to talk about a situation or to vent, they ARE NOT necessarily asking for my help. That impulse to help and fix things may be tied more into pride. 🤔 I’m practicing on waiting for the invitation to help instead of barging in. Listen 👂 more then speak.

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So I’m in a place in my life where I’ve realized that my mental state is not that great. I’ve always been one of those people where I have to be tough. I have to be consistent in the things I say and do because I have a lot of eyes on me. People depend on me, and they most often come before me. Always. 33 years almost hitting that year 34, that concept of “Always” isn’t an option anymore. Who am I at the end of 10-13 hours shifts; trying to lead a group of people who at many times have a vastly different approach, outlook, and walk of life than I do. Who am I when I get home and have to change roles on the short decompress of a car drive home. Now I’m Daddy. Now I’m Husband. And yeaaa I get it that’s Every man, that’s what we suppose to do. That’s what we’re taught. In all honestly if your a real man of understanding then that’s something you know in heart you have to do. That’s what men are built to do. The tough part is, in all of that, men have lost; hell society has lost the ability to address that this surely can’t be healthy for a man’s physique . I know I sure have lost the ability

So I’m making changes. First start was social media purge. There’s many t things that come up on my feeds, that I can t control. Which flows into the second change, putting effort imto understanding and accepting the things in my life that I can’t control…are LEGIT out of my control. I want to fix things, I want to be heard, because not being bias but I feel like the ideas and words that I choose to share around others is worth hearing. I honestly want to help in some way or fashion. But the things out of my control have in a sense taken control of my actions and reactions to the things around me. Anger is the biggest evil I face and deal with. It’s so easy to just be angry and I’ve taken the bait way too often over the past 6 months and especially the previous 2 weeks. So The time has come to fix that.

Awareness has been the biggest helper so far. I have two group of friends that I talk to mostly everyday. Sometimes you have to be able to voice these things out. A mutual awareness of how YOU feel between yourself and close friends is a must. You find out what they love about you, what they remind you you’re good at, and that you’ve made a good life for yourself and your love ones . At end of the day I know I’m not in this alone, and I can work through some of these mental things with people who want to support me.

So what is my path or my plan to get to where I want to be mentally?

1. Read more books about my culture, motivation/mental health awareness, and memoirs from other Black Men.

2. Journaling. This, writing has always been a passion for me. Writing down my thoughts, creating stories, brainstorming,etc; it has always put me in a calm headspace. It’s just me and my thoughts and creativity and in a lot of ways my overflowing feelings that never get an opportunity to release in a healthy way. Caged and chained away, but constantly reminding me of its presence banging on the inside ready to get out…and unfortunately sometimes they do..at the wrong times. I will be utilizing this platform to journal and also a self guided journal for healing for the next 45days.

3. Build a relationship with God. This relationship has been strained by many things in my life. This isn’t the time to go into detail(I’m sure that will present itself in the future) but it’s been a rocky road. I have so many questions that seem to have been unanswered for so long, I have anger towards God as well. But what relationship doesn’t have that involved. Minus religion, churches, holy people, etc I’m focused on a One on One relationship/discovery with God and God alone. And hopefully we arrive or I arrive in a good place at the end of that journey.

4. GROWTH. The literally sense of growth, where is the process heading? Is the precession working? What’s going into the process? There’s maintenance, prioritizing, awareness, and evaluation. What things in me and around me are growing, that I can have a direct control over.

*Start my Loc journey*Back into Gardening*Self-Development as a Boss, Husband, Father, and most importantly As a Human Being/Individual.

Who will Fitz discover at the end of this journey? That’s something I can’t wait to see.

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Perfection https://www.instagram.com/p/Btq5BpcHfIdCNN5lgCVv80DP40P-0MDm9e7kdA0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=b3jp6mcd3wc9

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The Elements of Writing

(Took a few notes and added on about writing)

Focus: 

Setting: Where is the story/scene taking place? How well do the characters know their surroundings? What is the mood of the setting? 

Character: What are the relationships between characters? How is the protagonist displayed? 

Perspective/Point of View/Narrative Techniques: Is the piece written in first or third person? Do the perspectives switch? How does one character view another character? How do they show it? 

Things to Consider: 

Narrative and Technique

Flashback vs. Foreshadowing: Background information or signs leading to bigger events? Both? 

Frame story: Is this a story within a story? 

Pace: Fast-paced? Slow burn?

Character

Characterization: Alignment? Personality? Hero or villain? Anti-hero? 

Main vs. Secondary: How do the protagonist(s) interact with side characters? How are they distinguished? 

***Round vs. Flat:***: Establish your character to be a *round* character! What does this mean? A round character exhibits strong character development instead of a flat “Mary Sue” character (unless that is intentionally what you’re going for)

***Dynamic vs. Static***: Focus on creating *dynamic* characters. These figures are meant to be interesting, round, well-developed, and even can be redeeming. This mainly focuses on personality and how well a character is distinguished in order to make them memorable. Static characters are bland, easily forgettable and possibly side characters that are given no distinguished role. 

Conflict/Plot:

Meaning: What’s the plot of the story? What/Who caused the conflict? Why is there conflict?

*Note: Plot holes? - Whenever revising a story or any piece of writing, focus on the What and the How. 

What is affecting a character/setting/tone/perspective? 

How does the character/setting/tone/perspective change or shift? 

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Age 30 hitting my body hard lol. I need to start some kind of routine to get me back in the position to run nonstop with these boys! #daddygettingold #myboysmyworld https://www.instagram.com/p/Bs1GuN7nRQuX9wxdNPWi1GRxvqBQkUmiHXZj280/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=243gbyzmepd6

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Legit Writing Tips #1: Quick Editing

To put it quite simply, editing is boring. And slow. And mind numbing. And frustrating. And long. Here’s a checklist to make it a little bit easier.

Write It. Then Don’t Touch It: Finish the scene, story, novel, paragraph, vignette, prompt, or chapter, then stop. Take a step away from your computer (or notebook. Hardcore) and leave it alone. There’s no hard and fast rule for how long, but the idea is to literally forget as much of what you just wrote as possible. The more you read the same thing over and over, the more your brain skips over what you think you already know, and that means you will forget things. Lots of things. So leave it alone.

Spell-check: This should be the most obvious thing in the world, but if you haven’t, run the whole thing through a spellchecker. You may have turned it off so you don’t see red lines under things you know are spelled correctly. Yes, thank you spell-check, I understand that my made up fantasy names seem to trigger something in you, but tone down the enthusiasm.

Run it through again anyway. See red, squiggly line? Fix it. Run it through a grammar checker. Still see lines? Fix it. Then get Microsoft Word or something with a built in spell-check. Seriously.

Focus on one thing at a time: Focus on dialogue on the first run through, then do description next, punctuation after that, etc. Pick one thing to focus on for each pass so you don’t get distracted or confused. Create your own checklist of things to keep an eye out for and do a run through every once and a while.

Check for repetitiveness: Make sure your sentences and paragraphs don’t start with the same word/letter. If you can say the same thing in less words, do it. If the character says something twice in a row, cut it out. If two sentences in a row starts with the same letter, adjust it. Same with paragraphs. Vary sentence and paragraph length, as well. Occasionally, you’ll have dialogue or description that naturally falls this way, this is fine, just don’t make a habit of it, and be aware of it.

Watch your dialogue tags: How many times has your character ‘laughed’ or ‘sighed’ or ‘smiled’ in this chapter? This leans into the repetitiveness we talked about above. Use new words. Get them to do new things. Don’t just add for the sake of adding, but adjust accordingly.

Change how you read it: As stated above, the more you read your story, the less you see of it. Change the font size, or the font itself. Print the story out on paper (not really applicable for novels). Change the color of the font in your favorite word processor and mark problems in red, good passages in blue, things that need to stay in green, etc. 

Keep notes as you write: This doesn’t help unless you’ve done it before you’ve started editing, but it’s helpful during edits. Keep track of everything. Add them everywhere. “Sarah has green eyes.” “John doesn’t like peas”. “Need to figure out a name for a town” “Need name for background character #7”, etc. That way you can write without needing to stop at every little question, and you can go back to make sure you stay consistent and Sarah doesn’t change eye color mid story.

Make your description match your scenes: Action scenes don’t need big words and flowing prose. Make it quick, concise, and urgent. Romance scenes and historical novels can take more description. Add all five senses. Describe more. Describe less. Make it work for what you’re writing. Give them different voices for dialogue. Make then all sound different and have distinctive tones.

Quick Checklist:

Put the story away and wait.

Fix all major spelling and punctuation problems.

Clean up the format (not majorly, just paragraph and sentence length and dialogue).

Go over notes. Adjust accordingly. Make more notes.

Make sure you have a good opening line.

Make us love (or hate) the characters accordingly.

Start close enough to the good stuff so it’s interesting, but not confusing.

Make your description match your scenes.

Make your dialogue match your characters.

Create conflict. Once you think you have enough, create more.

Cut out any and all dead spaces in your novel. Be brutal. Characters, dialogue, whole chapters. If it doesn’t fit, or make the story go forward in terms of plot, cut it. Don’t delete it though, create a document and save all your bits and pieces.. They could go in something else or spark some more ideas.

Make sure there’s enough to keep the reader engaged.

Fix all plot holes and add in back story.

Add in foreshadowing.

Make sure the story arc makes sense and ends with a satisfying climax.  Now that you’ve done all that, you’re ready for peer feedback! Find a good writing workshop, either in person or online, and post your newly edited story. You’ll get even more help and feedback and it will help polish up any and every part of your story. Plus you’ll get insight and ideas you’ve never even thought of.

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Too Smooth #thatsmyseed #mytwin #ourlegacy https://www.instagram.com/p/BrqRMOunTc_j_FRmKXd06KRk36cA2B7LK_feoo0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=s5irno9bwnzm

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8 Character Creation Tips (for DnD or just writing in general)

1. Have a goal

While it may sound like I’m stating the obvious here, your character needs to have something they want to accomplish. Maybe they want to be the best at something, see a place, fall in love, conquer the world, or something else. Whatever it is, they need to have something that they desire beyond all other things. Ideally, give them more than one goal. Make them have to sacrifice one to achieve the other, to add extra drama

2. Have a reputation

Maybe they’re the best artist in their class or they’re great at juggling. Perhaps they slipped on the stairs in front of their whole village. Either way, give something for the locals to remember about them. That way it can give you a starting point for the interactions with other characters

3. Have a friend

Whether a friend, a coworker, a sibling, an army buddy, or someone they saved, have someone close to your character whom they’re close to and wish well. Yeah, angsty “I have no friends” characters can be fun, but in small doses; eventually the reader gets fed up with them. At the very least the character needs someone to talk to or bounce ideas off of

4. Have a home

It may be a neighborhood they grew up in, their parents’ house, or a room they’ve been renting in a tavern. Hell, it could even be a person if you so choose. Everyone needs to feel secure at one time or another

5. Have a signature item

Now, recognize that this may not work for EVERY character, but it’s up to you to decide what will fit and what won’t. In many cases, it can work. A signature item is something that is recognizably YOUR CHARACTER’S, be it a weapon, a scarf, a toy, or a piece of jewelry. It’s something that makes them feel like themself

6. Have a problem

This should be something other than the problem addressed in the main plot line. Maybe a member of their family is sick, they are broke, or they’re failing their classes. This helps make your character seem more realistic because NO ONE has one problem at a time

7. Have a secret

This can affect the plot or not; either way, it helps make your character more well rounded. Maybe your character can’t read, left their crewmates to die when a kracken attacked their ship, or made their long lost sister run away. If you choose to have it affect the plot in any way, this secret should embarrass your character, make it so that other characters don’t trust your character, or somehow endanger them and the people they’re close to if found out

8. Have a reason to be brave and to fight

Maybe it’s because your character wants to be like their hero, maybe it’s so they can repay a debt (like if someone saved their life previously), maybe it’s for their child, but your character needs to have a reason to occasionally face their fears

Have fun!!!

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No way you’re 10 days old. #smooth #heaintnobaby #babybryant https://www.instagram.com/p/BppygeqHValotflibPJTlmiZDZb56lk9-cncfg0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1a8y6vyg1ezsq

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Love this!

Ways to make a character more interesting

Make them…

go to either extreme on a character trait (for example, way too trusting or far too distrusting.)

have an extreme political or philosophical stance.

have a set of interests that seem to contradict each other.

try for something impossible.

have completely opposite views from everybody around them.

imitate the mannerisms of their favorite celebrity, fictional character, or animal.

want badly to stand out and be unique.

have no qualms about breaking a widely-held custom.

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Sometimes the best stories don’t take words or plots. This WIP was born on 10-22-18. Welcome to the writers world Bryant Fitzgerald Parks

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Mankind’s attempt to cure the flu creates a viral outbreak that could end their own existence...and give birth to something else.

new writeblr challenge: create a bad news headline for your wip

mine would be: Girl In The Woods May Not Be Human, Says Furious Medicine Student