fellasisitgay
492 posts
Corona fucked my plans for grad school and now im stuck in limbo
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My pussy is an essential service
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It’s 100 degrees in my room and I can’t sleep so I’m gonna r e f l e c t real quick
#the last few months ive noticed how different things are with my thought processes#since i havent been in a constant state of anxiety/depression#and it's like eye-opening how much it seeped into every little thing i thought or did#i wouldnt do anything just for fun#like there was always something to avoid or it had to have some other purpose#bc i guess i had to justify everything? idk#but i stopped doing that and just overall ive been in such better spirits#it's like there was a cloud hanging over me all the time and i didnt know it was there telling me all this shit#dont break from your routine bc it'll throw you off and if you slip up there's no recovering#be home by 6 bc that's when the day ends and you have to be home and you cant leave#dont do anything that'll affect practice the next day bc you'll regret it#god all that stupid stuff i told myself and what did it get me besides more depressed bc i wasnt doing what i wanted to#i was soooo rigid all the time and i hated it but it made so much sense to me bc i was so delusional from anxiety ab everything#and since ive been home ive realized i had a lot more freedom than i thought i did with my parents which was so weird to find out#bc they were always so strict ab stuff#so i wouldnt make plans to like leave for a weekend or something bc i thought i would need permission that i wouldnt get??#idk the strict parent thinking thing is hard to explain but i would basically say no to myself on things which was dumb#anyways depression sucks and im still worried that i behaved strangely because of it bc i think i gave people i care ab wrong perceptions#ab me and ab how i think and yes it still bothers me bc like how do you change that idk#can i just send everyone i care ab a message that says id move a mountain if you ask me to bc that's how much i care that's not weird right
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My gym is having a “how many pushups in a minute” challenge this month and they called me out on insta for not doing it yet I think I have to do it now
#I got like 25 (?) in 45 seconds last time I timed myself#so i can probably get at least 30 which isnt bad#they have prizes but idk what they are#i just want the clout
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#i feel like ive been a lot healthier since i cut back on coffee#and there nothing wrong with coffee and i still have it like 2-3 times a week#but i was drinking waaaay too much and i hate black coffee so i would always need sugar in it which made things worse#now it’s like a weekend treat and i appriciate it a lot more#idk but ive been trying to be really good ab staying consistent with food/working out and i feel so much better physically#i spent a bunch of time outside yesterday just having fun and i had so much energy and it was so nice#and it reminded me of how drained i was all the time last year#im even like less bothered by the heat now it’s so weird#also im really bad at tennis that was a fun thing to learn
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I feel personally attacked by snapchat memories
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When guys have astrology signs. That’s a feminine trait
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So I failed the running thing but it’s okay bc I haven’t run in years so idk what I was expecting
#it was fun to do something new and different#even tho i couldnt really move yesterday and my legs are still killing me#i get hip pain now from running too much so i should probably stop#i think im gonna try another challenege next weekend but one that doesnt have so much running
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I’ve started the running thing and it is horrible but great at the same time
#i keep getting this weird pain in my right leg tho#which has been happening the last few years every time i run#i think i figured out what’s causing it tho so hopefully it gets better#im 8 miles into the 48 so far#my hair is too long bc i havent got it cut in months and ive reverted to wearing a bandana as a headband#and it looks hella gay and i love it
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I found this running challenge on line last weekend and it sounds horrible but also fun so I’m gonna do it this weekend
#even tho running sucks#im so bored in the quarn#it’s making me want to do things like run#im also gonna paint some shoes#bc im feeling exercisey AND crafty
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Hey bro I just found out about this awesome thing called kissing me right on the lips wanna try
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if a girl doesn't push me against a wall and gaze into my eyes with homoerotic intent soon then i will simply die i think
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actually i love talking about very niche unrelatable things on tumblr nothing is sexier than a 0 note post because it means i’m the sexiest unique bitch
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