febymirza

[febymirza]

1st anniversary!

He changed my life. He changed me into a better person, a lovable version of myself -at least for me- he made me capable of loving my own self by showing me how to spread his abundance love and sacrifices.

Being with him, never I have a dull moment. It’s just a day with new lessons, laughs and -sometimes angers- showing that we’re just two human being learning from each other.

He’s playful and funny. There are times he annoys me to make me only missing him when we’re not talking in a busy day.

He said, blessings are not solely related to materials. Good friends, a peaceful heart, a good companion are just the other forms. Being thankful for our lives is imperative.

I am thankful for him. I am happy.

[febymirza]

Bapak

Kau mengajariku tetap berdiri di tengah derasnya ombak

Memberitahuku cara memecah gunung es

Kadangkala menginginkanku melawan derasnya arus

Kau cahaya saat gelap mendera

Penyemangat dari jauh atau dekat

Penopangku saat aku goyah dan tak tahu arah

Sedari kecil kau mengajariku arti kemandirian juga arti membutuhkan

Sejak mengenal alam kau menjadikanku tak takut akan sakit dan kecewa

Senyummu, tawamu, membuatku ingin menaklukkan segala

Kebahagiaan saat menceritakan pencapaianku membuatku ingin bisa, terus bisa

Semangatmu, selalu menjadi semangatku juga

Bapak, terima kasih

Untuk semua hal yang sudah kau korbankan untukku

Aku ingat bagaimana kau mendidikku untuk menjadi disiplin

Aku ingat bagaimana setianya engkau mengantarku kemanapun aku pergi

Aku ingat bagaimana caramu menjelaskan prestasiku kepada teman-temanmu

Aku ingat bagaiamana serunya kita menonton pertandingan sepakbola

Aku ingat gelak tawa kita di telpon

Aku ingat, semuanya, dan tak akan lupa

Bapak,

Semoga Allah selalu melimpahkan keberkahan dalam hidupmu

Semoga Allah menyayangimu seperti halnya engkau menyayangiku, bahkan lebih

Semoga Allah selalu melindungimu di dunia juga di akhirat

[febymirza]

Please, Lord

what a life! unexpected life to be exact

I’ve been in situations where I prayed so hard and asked God why all of my prayers hasn’t been answered. And now I’m in a situation where I’ve been given so many things that I’ve always wanted.

I’m so thankful and I praise you My Lord, but honestly there’s so many things running in my mind. I feel a little bit nervous, but Lord please always guide me to you. Please make everything easy and Lord, I really need YOU and your blessings.

Lā haula wa lā quwwata illā billāhil 'aliyyil azhīmi

:’)

[febymirza]

God, I’m so thankful for that human. For being super nice, super chill, cool, and not putting me into a difficult position, for understanding me and my ambitions, for letting me living my life’s map.

I know that I’m asking for too much, praying so much for myself, but God, for that human, I want him all the best thing in life, all kind of happiness, and surely your blessings. Please God give us an easy path, Aamiin 🤲🏻

[febymirza]

Dilema

bahkan sampai saat ini

gadis itu masih penakut

merasa tak punya kapasitas untuk dicintai

menarik diri dan tak ingin untuk dicari

juga hingga kini

gadis itu tidak mudah dikelabui

apalagi mempercayai kata manis

ia percaya janji-Nya bahwa gadis baik untuk pria baik

dan ia bersyukur masih dibekali itu

untuk percaya, gadis itu bukan dengan kata

apalagi sapa harian yang menyiksa

agar pelan-pelan saja jangan tergesa

karena ia perlu berpikir dulu untuk kemudian memutuskan bagaimana

duh, bolehkah ia meminta

terus menunggu dan mengetuk pintu?

saat ia berani, ia yang akan menemuimu di situ

[febymirza]

a little girl and the tree

a little girl put on a worry face

she keeps walking passing the green tree

in her mind she asks the tree why it can’t be greener or maybe shadier

she is afraid of her beautiful dreams and how ruin it can be if the tree is not enough for her to hold on

she wants to leave, lights on a tiny hope, praying that she will find the perfect, exactly the tree that she always wished for

believing that it’s not too much for her to keep walking.

[febymirza]

healing

after a hurricane, there’s a rainbow~ they said

healing after failing, rebuild the broken

finding the fastest method to override the moment, the person

believing that as soon as possible to find a new one is a goal achieving

but it’s somewhat wrong

that special person that used to love and be loved by you held your sweet and bitter memories

they used to get your respect, even now they should also have some pieces of the leftover scenes from your togetherness, so don’t forget to still respect them

accept the fact that the scar is from that (then) special person and you shouldn’t use someone else to heal it

for the sake of respect you can’t just switch the old and the new ones, because they’re not the same person

heal and fix the broken with your sense that everything happens for some reasons

make peace with your heart, make yourself wiser, kinder, more proper

and trying to love someone new because you like them as their own different self

everything will be okay, when you walk through it all you will see yourself as a better person

and without you knowing, everything will be put into its own place

[febymirza]

I hope

I hope when you’re ready, you’ll come knocking at my door because i closed everything way too long now

I hope you’ll come calling, because it’s been a habit for me to cover my ears not listening

and when you’re there, i hope you make a little light because my eyes getting used to see shadows

I hope I will tell you all of these unwritten in front of you, seeing your smile and that warm eyes

I hope when you read this, you’ve fallen in love with me so you will rushing to message me and we’ll talk for hours

I hope we were destined to be under the same stars without no fault

[febymirza]

not enough

when someone/something looks hard to be your mine/to achieve, actually from the first moment you’ve already got a glimpse of incompatibility

sometimes your inferiority bites you, most of the time it frightens you

fighting with tiny lights of hope or embracing reality, both keeps you awake until late of nights

they said fake it til’ you make it, but holding on a thin thread will never get you anywhere

at this very moment, you will know that your confidence is not enough

you’re just not enough…. of your hopes, of your loved ones, of your crush, of your reality

then, you just need to be humble

down -as low as possible- to earth, live day by day, build your simple minds

enough of nothing, alone by yourself, learn to love your attainable circle

just be happy, and live again from zero

[febymirza]

Heartbreak

Everyone in the world, regardless of gender, must have experienced heartbreak at least once in their life. Can they move on easily? Many people believe that women find it harder to forget their previous relationship and start a new one. However, there are two main reasons that explain that men can also face difficulties moving on after a broken heart.

Firstly, we know that many big musicians are men. Especially for a singer-songwriter, usually they make a song based on their own experience. One of the most famous song wrote by Adam Levine titled Sad and we can find that the lyrics are about a relationship that was not working as he expected and how hard it was for him to get over his past.

Secondly, it’s mentioned in many literatures that men could be having a hard time to start a new relationship. If we read a novel by HAMKA titled Tenggelamnya Kapal Van Der Wijck, we will know that until his past lover dies, he still loves her.

In conclusion, both men and women are human who can be heartbroken and find it difficult to forget and start a new relationship.

[febymirza]

remember what you’ve always told to yourself

- people will never decrease your value unless you allow them to do so. no matter how bad your situation is, bear in your mind that … it is just a journey. you’re content, you’re valuable, you’re something -

[febymirza]

proud of my self! 🧡

[febymirza]

aku suka hari ulang tahun

terutama di hari ini aku bahagia, karena keberadaanku diselamati oleh orang terdekat dan kolega

setidaknya di hari ini kiriman doa diberikan, spesial untukku

melihat mereka berusaha menyenangkan hati

hari ini selalu aku nanti

aku suka hari ulang tahunku :)

[febymirza]

I’m not shy or embarrassed to be falling apart.

- Adele

[febymirza]

…

satu persatu

mimpi semu

di depan mataku

Tuhan satu

Maha Pemberi mau

penguatku

pintaku

agar mengingatMu selalu

[febymirza]

Segala puji bagi Allah, yang senantiasa memberikan banyak nikmat, walau kita lebih sering tak mensyukurinya.

Segala puji bagi Allah, yang senantiasa memberikan banyak kebutuhan yang tidak pernah kita pinta, walau kita lebih sering mengabaikannya—setiap harinya.

Segala puji bagi Allah, Rabb yang sedari awal tak pernah meninggalkan, yang telah hujankan kita dengan ragam kenikmatan, walau... kita baru tersadar kala kita kehilangannya.

Lagi-lagi telak kita ditampar realita, jika kita memang tak memiliki daya upaya. Semua hal yang kita anggap jaya, ternyata hanya kamuflase dari fananya keperkasaan kita.

Sepertinya memang sudah terlalu lama kita lalai, terlelap di atas pemberianNya yang tidak pernah kita ganjar dengan kesyukuran.

Sudah terlalu lama sepertinya kita abai, termabukkan di dalam kehebatan yang ternyata hanyalah tipu daya setan.

Maka, semoga kedustaan kita atas nikmatNya segera berakhir. Semoga puji syukur kita mengalir tak henti atas segala apa yang telah Allah beri.

Segala puji bagi Engkau ya Rabb, yang masih menyelamatkan dan masih berikan kesempatan. Ampuni diri kami yang lebih sering mengingkari semua ini.

[febymirza]

Allez Les Blues

Ok, Euro 2020 selesai.

Inggris kalah, tim yang entah kenapa walopun ga selalu jadi jagoan tapi selalu ada di hati. Entah mungkin karena aku fans klub Inggris. Tapi kebiasaan dari dulu, kalo Inggris main pasti dukung Inggris.

Kalah adu penalti.

Jujur aku ga suka penalti. Terlalu banyak momen buruk.

Final WC Perancis - Italia, final UCL Chelsea - Man. United, i hate it.

Tapi yang paling sedih di momen Euro 2020 ini waktu Perancis kalah. Menurutku mereka ga layak kalah. Dengan kualitas pemain kelas terbaik dunia, pola nyerang yang magical, pribadi yang fun dan seru untuk diliat di Youtube dan Instagram, sesedih itu waktu Kylian Mbappe ga gol. Kylian si anak ajaib dengan market value tertinggi di dunia saat ini. Ngolo Kante si ga pernah cape dan selalu senyum. Tapi momen ini juga yang mengingatkan lagi, bahwa bola itu bundar. I do adore athletes. Kalo reinkarnasi itu ada, aku mau lahir di keluarga athlete ahahahaha

Ga sabar untuk liat Perancis bisa juara dunia selanjutnya, ga sabar liat Inggris yang penuh talenta muda bisa bersinar terus.

Oiya, seneng juga Messi dan Argentina bisa juara Copa America. Tapi sedih liat Neymar nangis sampe kedengeran di suara tv. Messi alien yang akan ku dukung klubnya kalo pindah dari Barcelona wkwk. Tapi Neymar selalu ada tempat di hati. Menurutku sepak bola itu cocok untuk anak slengekan, yang kalo diliat dia cuma pengen have fun dalam hidup. Dan itu Neymar. Neymar itu pemain bola yang ada di mindsetku. Be your hero.

Eh, sepak bola Indonesia apa kabar?

aku masih naroh keyakinan di David Maulana, Bagus Kahfi cs loh. Bisa yaaa, bisa yuk!