fcktylerw

[fcktylerw]

@rowanwhat: blaaah

@tywats: one of those days, yeah?

[fcktylerw]

I didn't say it was, I just said it could be.

Dude! What the hell? Move it. I’m trying to go out for a burrito.

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also to celebrate the reopening i had kfc twice in one week for this just for the watsons mkay (yep that might just be a inside joke whoops famjam)

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Excuse you, I called dibs when I hopped out of the womb.

I’ve come to the decision that I am, indeed,  the male Beyonce of this cul-de-sac. Bow down, bitches. 

[fcktylerw]

Whoops, maybe it could be my car...

Figured. Whoever owns this car needs a new paint job. Maybe some new rims too. Looks like shit.

[fcktylerw]

Not to some people.

I thought froyo was an all year kind of thing?

[fcktylerw]

I work all year round, and it seems like very little people are interested in froyo in autumn and winter. A little in spring.

People buy frozen yogurt only in the summer? I buy it whenever I want some, the season doesn’t matter to me…

[fcktylerw]

I can't wait for summer, maybe then people will start to buy froyo.

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Not me, my car's in it's usual spot.

Which one of you idiots thought it was funny to block my car? There’s an entire cul-de-sac to park in. Now get off my fucking driveway before I tell my dad on you.

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@tywats: Look at this little cutie!!

[fcktylerw]

Well the... package did look familiar.

Plot twist where they totes didn’t, though.

[fcktylerw]

So basically... you want a doll?

I really want a baby. Minus all the crying, and screaming, and pooping. And having to pay for things for them.

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@mattnolan: @tywats omg really?? that's great I actually wrote it with a male voice in mind i'm so happy

[fcktylerw]

I got nudes sent to my phone today.. — I think they might have got the wrong number.

[fcktylerw]

I spend my time wondering the same thing.

Has anybody ever actually gotten salmonella from eating raw cookie dough or are people just trying to stop me from living my life?