fate2716

[fate2716]

“I don’t understand shippers” me neither. I don’t understand my own inability to consume media without allowing two fictional characters who stared at each other a little too long that one time to completely take over my brain.

[fate2716]

Wednesday: I gotta go

Enid: aren't you forgetting something?

Wednesday:.......uh-

Wednesday: *gives her a light kiss on the lips and then heads towards the door*

Enid: *blush* I meant your snood….but this is fine too

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Enid: (Skips)

Wednesday: (Stares after her in revulsion.)

Also Wednesday: (Falls in love)

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I just keep reading fanfiction and thinking about how fun it will be when season 2 comes out and none of our headcanons will be real, like Wednesday speaking Italian or the nickname "Willa" and in some way, we'll still be surprised that they are not true.

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"Why can't a friendship between those two same-sex characters just be a friendship?" "You guys are pushing it everywhere."

Actually, most of those ships you're getting angry at are not even canon, and there's little to no rep for lgbtq+ especially in mainstream media, while there's a ton for bromance (not for girls friendships but ya know, well written female characters are ALSO lacking in mainstream medias). You'll survive some people having headcanons about two fictional characters (don't interact and you won't see it anymore anyway).

(Yes platonic love matter and stuff and you can see a relationship as platonic if you want but let people do the same. Just stop posting on every post about the ship "actually they see eachother as siblings"/"they're only besties".)

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Wednesday having a one sided beef with Ajax is one of my favorite fanfic tropes. ITS SO FUNNY AND I LIVE FOR IT. Specially when Enid and him already broke up but Wednesday is still mad piss. Ajax either is aware of it and it’s super scared or he doesn’t notice, either way it’s so fucking funny.

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Enid: What in the actual hell is wrong with you!?

Wednesday: ...

Wednesday: *pulls out ridiculously long and color coded list*

Wednesday: I've been waiting my entire life for somebody to ask me that question, mi amor.

~~~~

Yoko: really?! That's how you two started dating?!

Enid: You didn't see the way she smiled when she got to the pyromania section! What else was I meant to do?!

Yoko: Call the police?!

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During an investigation in the woods, Wednesday and Bianca hunt for clues with a leashed Enid in wolf form.

Wolf Enid: *leads while sniffing*

Bianca: Isn’t this demeaning?

Wednesday: Requiring your assistance as a third pair of eyes? Yes, it is.

Bianca: No, bitch, the leash.

Wednesday: Ah. It is an unfortunate necessity.

Wolf Enid: *ears perk*

Bianca: Seriously? Enid is an intelligent werewolf and your girlfriend, not some dumb dog. It’s not like she’s gonna run off.

Wednesday: *shoots Enid a glance*

Wolf Enid: *tail tucks*

Wednesday: I have my reasons.

Wolf Enid: *sheepish* Growf.

— On a previous investigation. —

Wednesday: Enid, don’t you DARE! That corpse is evidence! EVIDENCE!!

Wolf Enid:

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Wednesday: Betrayal. And by the one whom is supposed to be my closest ally. Now I see where your loyalties truly lie.

Enid: ...Babe, this isn't about loyalty, it's just that it would be, like, super illegal for me to use my wolf form to threaten the sherif into dropping all 22 of your felony charges.

Wednesday: What I'm hearing is that chivalry is dead and you don't love me

Enid: ...

Enid: *Sigh*

Enid: *transforms*

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Enid: *dances around her room alone*

Enid: 🎶 What is love? 🎶

Enid: 🎶 Oh baby, don’t hurt me— 🎶

Enid: 🎶 Don’t hurt me— 🎶

Enid: 🎶 No more! 🎶

Wednesday: *from behind Enid* My apologies.

Enid: *shrieks and stumbles*

Wednesday: *downcast* I was… unaware you felt that way.

Enid: Wh-What?

Wednesday: I shall banish myself from our—no, your room—until you find it within yourself to forgive me.

Wednesday: *picks up BDSM trunk and leaves*

Enid: *processing*

Enid: Oh that stupid freaking— IT WAS JUST A SONG! COME BACK! *chases after Wednesday*

— Moments later, outside in the courtyard. —

Bianca: And this is Ophelia Hall, winners of the last annual Poe Cup. You can read about the exciting event on page seven of our broch—

The doors to Ophelia Hall burst open as Wednesday strides out and past Bianca’s tour group.

Enid: *frantically follows* Baby, hurt me more! I really mean it! PLEASE!

Bianca and tour group:

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Wednesday: did you get the dozen eggs, like I asked you to?

Enid:

Yoko:

Wednesday: what

Enid: We got something even BETTER

Wednesday:

Yoko: *holds up a chicken*

Enid: Her name's Henny Penny Addams

Wednesday:

We all know that Wednesday accepted Henny Penny as her own child

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Wednesday: Did you eat all the powdered sugar donuts?

Enid: *mouth full of donuts* Uhm. Mno?

Wednesday: Then what's all that white powder on your face?

Enid:

Enid: Cocaine?

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Random Wenclair headcanon inspired by recent fanart

Wednesday is gonna buy Enid a Polaroid camera. Just cause she loves that wolf to death. Enid is gonna document all their special anniversaries and bdays and outings with each other and friends and have a whole section of wall in their dorm room to post the Polaroid pics. Wednesday rolls her eyes every time Enid takes a pic but inside she fucking loves it and goes to look at the pictures and smiles and reminisces when Enid isn’t in their room 🥰🖤🩷

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Wednesday playing with Kitty the Lion.

Enid: Wednesday, that is- that’s a predator.

Wednesday, with the most childish smile on her face: He’s not a predatorb

Kitty the Lion chuffs happily as Wednesday continues to mes with his ears.

Enid: Oh my god.

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Enid: So like—I’m kind of crushing on someone, but I’m worried about saying who it is, because none of you are going to like it

Yoko: Girl, just rip the bandage off.

Enid: It’s Wednesday.

Yoko: *stands*

Divina: *begins weeping*

Bianca: *rubs Divina’s back*

Enid: *confused* What’s going—

Yoko: We are gathered here today to honor and celebrate the life of Enid Sinclair—

Enid: 😦

Yoko: —which was cut tragically short when she fucked up and got down bad for Psycho Bitch Sailor Doom.

Enid:

Enid: OH COME ON!!

Divina: It’s… it’s like she’s still here. *sobs*

Bianca: I miss her too, Div. I miss her too.

Enid: 🤬

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Bianca: What’s wrong with Xavier this time?

Wednesday: He is suffering from comphem.

Bianca: Uh—no. That boy is actual factual straight. Nothing compulsory about it. And why the heck would he be in the infirmary for that?

Wednesday: I said comphem, not comphet.

Bianca: The fuck is that?

Wednesday: Compulsory hemorrhaging.

Bianca:

Bianca: What?

Wednesday: *matter-of-factly* Society pressures him to bleed profusely.

Bianca: Society.

Wednesday: Precisely.

Bianca: Does this ‘society’ happen to be a five foot three blonde with hair dyed like Harley Quinn and a possessive streak wider than the fucking Amazon River?

Wednesday: Whatever are you implying?

Bianca: Bitch, I’m—

Enid: *runs up* Willa, where’s the spare bleach?!

Wednesday: My closet, right wall, second shelf from the bottom, next to the Luminol.

Enid: Thank, babe! *kisses Wednesday’s cheek*

Wednesday: *merely nods*

Enid: Oh hi, B! Bye, B! *scampers off*

Bianca:

Wednesday:

Bianca: *smirks*

Wednesday: *glares* What is it?

Bianca: It uh—looks like society left some pink lip gloss— *points* —on your cheek.

Wednesday: *sighs* Society is quite, shall we say, compulsively homosexual.

Bianca:

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Enid: Okay, babe, truth or dare?

Wednesday: Truth.

Enid: How are you planning to murder my mom?

Wednesday:

Wednesday: Dare.

Enid: Don’t murder my mom.

Wednesday: I loath this game.