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Drew a couple of outfits from some mmo's ~

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beautiful ghost flies thru my window and lifts me to the sky

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one of my Catchable Monster designs…maybe a simple name like "Celky"

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she going to space

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ギャングなすいちゃん | さむ

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Silent Hill (Otherside) ‘Silent Hill’ PlayStation Akira Yamaoka Support us on Patreon

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by 阿+@abbear157

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Scarlett

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low-poly, ps1-ish Batter

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Inktober 9: The Hermit

(Slim, a repenomamus. the dog is simosuchus, a very little type of crocodile.)

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魔女の嫁入り

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funny couch char belongs to @theborealyoako

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for any who have been following, I have considered and accepted the criticisms made in my posts about crimew's essay.

my posts had two flaws: one being a use of charged language (sucking and fucking, primarily) which generated some misunderstandings on the nature of the point being made, often towards a more moral or ascetic argument, neither of which were my intention. the second follows similarly, the use of the word decadence, which in addition to the above issues carries a history of use in reactionary contexts that I was not aware of and have now noted.

that said, this past day has been a deeply wretched experience, watching my timeline fill with posts vaguing me, ridiculing me or putting words in my mouth. nobody criticized me directly, so I had to go on a paranoid dive through as many blogs as I could will myself to in order to learn what people were saying about my post and what the nature of my error was. this was all very distressing.

on one hand I do not particularly blame anyone, as you were simply responding to what you saw from your own frame of understanding. and if making a flawed post serves to provide a basis for further productive discourse and public education, then maybe that's not so bad.

on the other hand, it was a humiliating and helpless experience. nobody discussed anything with me directly and so many went straight to judgement and shaming. I have a small following without a lot of reach and not a lot of people know me-this simultaneously made it easier to be dogpiled on and harder to course correct, which I could have done immediately if anyone talked to me or addressed me directly.

but, whatever, right? that's just how social media can be? indeed. and now that I've had a (even relatively small) taste of it I've had to carefully consider if this is worth my time, for all the duress it has caused me. I have a history of being socially murdered to a point I was nearly homeless, in addition to the myriad experiences of being talked to behind my back. yesterday had echoes of those experiences in a way that I simply am incapable of coping with.

I needed tumblr as an outlet to make friends with comrades and have productive discussions, but even more I need my mental health and energy, which needs to be directed towards the more imminent issues in my life. I had hoped to participate in some level of reform to the environment of social media, at least within this little bubble, to be more straightforwardly constructive. I see now that I am not cut out for that job, and that it is likely not even possible at all due to the structure of the site. anyhow, I am going to take some time away from tumblr and focus on other aspects of my life.

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Cosmic knight comm for spidershat 🤍

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It's hard being a single mom of four to eight kids (she's bad at math)

Also self imposed design challenge to design an infant rodent that doesn't look like eraserhead baby