exbrows

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the first million people to send me a dollar will get a copy of my e-book on how to become a millionaire

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when Jesus knew Judas would betray him but invited him to brunch just for the drama of it all

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reblog to add +10 haunting power to your ghost when you die

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Attention all customers: our store will be closing in five minutes. If you are present in the store after closing you will be hunted for sport.

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hey guys whats up

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unpopular opinion but people who are righthanded can go fuck themselves. we lefties out here living our best lives

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Me: marvel PLEASE leave tony stark alone im begging

Marvel: ok :)

Me: wh

Me: h

Me: wait nO

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God made me unphotogenic to keep me humble and i respect that

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the fact that my eyes don’t glow when i’m at my strongest is unacceptable and not on brand

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Waking up on september 1st like:

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Hope everyone is well today !

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elon musk and grimes are the weird emo kids who wear matching collars and like meow at each other in public

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Me, looking back at how many books i used to read: I love that bitch, she was going places.

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the green tea got me FUCKED up. i am so crazy right now

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me: *clicks a settings menu*

my family: love having a tech expert in the house :) 

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remember kids: rats are the capri sun of the vampire world

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