esther-mwananshiku-blog

[esther-mwananshiku-blog]

'We need to talk'

Who else finds this message disturbing? I definitely do, the moment I receive such text, my mind start to wonder, I start asking myself what wrong did I do? I become restless.

You must be wondering where all this is coming from. I wake up at 2am, as usual I check my phone for time. I see a message that came at 10pm from sugar man. The message says 'We need to talk'

My brain freezes, I don't know what to think, did I say something or do anything that might have hurt his feelings?

I rewind my day. We seemed to be okay, to be fine. My day started early just like any other Saturday because I have sports update with George, it went well, I enjoyed because sports is my thing. After that went to the ground kariba fm had a football game with Nyami Nyami of Zimbabwe.

I had fun, like a lot of fun, it was fun to see how some DJs were running away from the ball. Others were just running around without direction, they should just stick to playing music and not soccer, yeah we lost 3-1.

After the game we went out. Played pool, danced a little and made noise. I almost lost my voice, I don't know if it was because of screaming at the ground or the aftermath.

We seemed fine. Very fine. I have no idea why we need to talk. The time he said he was coming draws near and sadenly I feel the edge to go to the toilet, oho my God am I having diarrhea? My heart is racing and my eyes watering.

I take a glass of water and tell myself to calm down, at least until I hear what he has to say, what if it's something good, I have to be positive for once in my life.

I'm calm but a little scared if not a lot. Gosh I hate the 'we need to talk' message.

[esther-mwananshiku-blog]

My Crush

Well, well, well!!! Some topics are better not talked about, but someone insisted I talk about my Crush, I was even punished for not telling him who I crushed on when I first started work. I might say he has a weird way of punishing me.

During my three months stay in Siavonga, I have met a number of men, some are nice and others are weeelll, yeah, they are okay.

If you know me well enough, you should know my definition of handsome, but I will still tell you. I am not a complicated person, I don't have a long list. I just what my man Tall, Dark and a beautiful Smile is a must have.

I have seen different smiles so far but only two have caught my attention but between the two only one stands out, this guy's smile brightens my day, It is probably the most beautiful thing at the station.

I don't really remember what happened when we first met, because I did not pay attention to people's looks particularly guys. I considered everyone to be my coworkers and I had no plans of crushing or liking anyone not even falling in love.

I started noticing this particular guy when I got his number, and the first thing I do when I save someone's number is to look at their profile picture and Damm, I liked what I saw. I found myself looking at his profile picture, just staring at it, I begun to notice his smile. I know I sound stupid right now but yeah.

I begun to pay attention to his looks in reality of course. I realized that his tall, he is actually tall, I stand on my toes when hugging him. Oho yes, he is dark and a smile to die for.

I kept it to myself, maintained my cool and distance, I made sure to keep myself busy whenever he was around.

So fast forward, my first cursh in siavonga is still my Crush upto this day. He doesn't even know that it's him, he suspects other guys but it's you sugar man, it has always been you.

[esther-mwananshiku-blog]

About 9.07.22

[esther-mwananshiku-blog]

Work or Home sick??

Why do I feel not good enough for the job? Am I really up to the task? Or maybe I have failed to perform? Or maybe I'm just home sick?

It's exactly midnight, in my bed, Of course trying to sleep but I just can't. I have tried everything possible just to have some sleep but my mind keeps wondering, trying to find answers to the above questions.

I can't lie I have cried a little the past two days. Yeah, I'm a cry baby sometimes but I make sure no one sees me. Why am I even crying? Maybe it because I miss home, I miss my babies, Buseko especially, my Buseko.

I recently traveled to Lusaka but it was just for a day. I saw Buseko, she has really grown but she is still the same, I guess you know what I mean.

She did everything she did for me before I left but I guess we didn't get enough of each other. She danced for me. She told me all that had happened at school, what teacher told her and my favorite part of the day is when she makes me a cup of tea. Nothing beats Buseko's cup of tea, the best tea I have tasted so far.

It's been three months since I left home and I thought I'm used to staying alone but I'm getting flashbacks but I'm fine. I know it will take a bit longer but I will survive.

Then, there is work. God knows I'm trying my best but there is just this guy that is always trying to make me feel incompetent. Maybe I am. Maybe I am not. I don't know.

But I'm grateful to God, Siavonga has given me the best support system, they always have my back even when I'm not around.

And my greatest support system is my sugar man, he is always around cheering me on even on simple things like switching on a microphone, he will be like 'my ka girl, I'm proud of you'. Oho I'm a chi girl by the way but I'm grateful for the support, it keeps me going.

And I'm working on changing my paradigm. I know you will ask what I mean. I will explain in my next write up.

What is really making me cry nowadays? Is it work or home sick? Or maybe both? I don't know, still trying to figure out.

It's now 1 AM, I'm even hungry. Let me check if my house has something I can eat... Why am I not even gaining? I wonder.

[esther-mwananshiku-blog]

Twaambo Movie

When Josphant aka Future light asked me how I felt after seeing the movie Twaambo, I just opened my mouth. Having worked with me for a while now, he knows I'm always blank when asked to say my last words.

But it was different, today I didn't say anything not because I had nothing to say which is always the case but because I was amazed at how much talent Siavonga has.

I have been in Siavonga for only two months and the only thing I know siavonga has is Lake Kariba, the fish and the famous Siavonga kapenta. But that's a story for another day, today I'm talking about Twaambo

Twaambo, Twaambo! Twaambo! Where do I even start from? Twaambo is a young girl who lost her father at a every young age. Being raised by a single parent, Twaambo encountered a number of challenges including failing to pay her school fees.

Wanting to continue her education, Twaambo makes wrong decisions. What are these wrong decisions? And What do they cost her? Well, I will be spoiling the movie if I answered these questions.

The cast was on point, everyone was in character and definitely the director knew exactly what he wanted and that was achieved. By the way, my favorite actor is the accountant, not because he is my boss but because it was nice seeing him in a different setup. 'Eagle one', that's how we call him, he definitely did justice.

And the picture quality is on point, and I asked myself, what if they used big cameras? I doubt if I would have had words to describe the picture quality.

In a Nutshell, Twaambo is a movie series to look forward to, it is based on a true story and you might just pick one or two lessons from Twaambo's story. And with this kind of work Siavonga films is definitely heading to the top.

[esther-mwananshiku-blog]

Life in Siavonga

Woww, Wowww!! was my reaction when I was first told that I was moving to Siavonga to work for a Radio station as a programmes Manager.

I was excited, I got the job and as a programmes Manager, who wouldn't? But at the same time, I was sad, cried a little if not a lot because my moving meant that I had to leave a lot of things behind, My family, my friends, the congregation and just everything.

I can say I have lived most of my life in Lusaka, did my primary and secondary education in Lusaka and My university too.

The time for leaving finally came, it was my first time traveling to the south, Chilanga was the furthest I had traveled in the southern direction.

Reality hit when I saw a billboard with the writing 'you are now leaving Lusaka'. Tears rolling down, memories of my dramatic family, my baby girls who have now turned into my best friends, our late night talks, my music nights with Kasaila and guess what? It was Simi's "Smile for me" playing in my headsets. More tears rolled down and by the time we reached kafue my eyes were swollen, my head paining and I think my shirt was wet. I cried myself to sleep.

My phone beeped, I opened my eyes, looked through the window, I had no idea where I was, I looked at my phone and it was a message from Precious the girl who was waiting for me " hey, where have you reached? drop off at Kaleya junction."

Oho My God, I was now scared, how on earth will I know Kaleya junction, I looked through the window again and I realized it was dark, checked the time, it was 20:15hrs. I felt a big lump forming on my throat, it was hard but I swallowed it.

I took a deep breath and talked to the guy sitted next to me, I did not pay attention to how he looked, so don't ask me, I don't know.

"Hey" I said.

"Hey, you have finally removed your headsets?" he replied.

I was ashamed and glad it was dark because he was not able to see what I have been doing.

"yeah," I answered and continued to say, "Do you know Kaleya junction? That's where I'm dropping off but it's my first time here."

He looked at me and Laughed, at this moment I knew I had no choice but to talk to the bus conductor.

Just before I gathered my courage and strength to shout out, I heard a male voice from behind saying, "we are still far that's where I'm dropping off as well."

Those words were so calming like a cold glass of water on a hot day. That was the sweetest thing ever said to me on that day.

Time check 21:00hrs, the bus stops and a voice from behind says twafika mummy(we have reached), I thanked him got my bag, said bye to the guy next to me and dropped off.

To be continued.....

[esther-mwananshiku-blog]

WELCOME TO BLOG.

My name is Esther Mwananshiku and welcome to my blog.

 I was born on the 9th march, 1993 in Luwingu, Northern part of Zambia. I’m the last Born in the family of eight; I have four brothers and three sisters.  My father’s name is Katongo Mwananshiku and my mother’s name is Esther Mwila Mwananshiku.

I’m Bemba by tribe from the newest province that is Muchinga province but I have never being there from what I have heard it is a nice place.

I started school in 1998 at Muchileka basic school, in 2004 I moved to Lusaka  and that is where I continued my primary school at Libala basic school and i was there  until I completed my basic education and in 2007 I went to Libala high school and that is where I completed my grade 12.

In 2010 I applied at the University of Zambia and I was accepted in 2011, my stay at the university is very interesting and I have learnt a lot and hoping to learn more for the time that I will spend at the university.   

My hobbies are reading, watching movies, listening to music, dancing, cooking and making new friends.

My friends are purity Nkandu, Mumba Shambayi,Ruth kasongo, Benjamin Simutenda and my best friends are my parents. My favorite color is purple and I’m 1.5m tail.

This blog will help me in my academic writing in the sense that my course mate will be able to correct me when I’m wrong and commend me when I write something good.my work will also be used in other class so as help others learn more about writing for feather articles in papers, magazines and other academic writing in the mass communication department at the university of Zambia and i believe this will halp me more in my journalism.