error404empathy

[error404empathy]

I think Luke took advantage of Nicola at the SAGs to get attention. She doesn’t need him for good PR but he meds her and he knows it. That might not always be the case but it seems like it at the moment.

thanks! i don’t think i’ll be replying to asks like that anymore. it’s not really a conversation. it’s a statement shaped by disappointment. that’s what happens when fandom trust collapses. 👆

here comes the boring part. moral takes based on vibes and edits rarely hold up. we don’t know them. we barely know our friends.

took advantage? that’s like accusing the market vendor of manipulation because he says i have beautiful eyes just to get me to buy three extra tomatoes i didn’t need. it’s not some grand plan. it’s just your perception. one that used to feel flattering. now it feels bitter.

when the woman is more successful or visible (nic), and the man seems messier or reactive (luke, mid-brand confusion), the classic “she’s being used” trope jumps out. it happened with jake too.

personally, i blame the ambiguity more than the men. which is new for me. i’m usually first in line for a gendered callout. 🫣(let’s hope no one i know reads this.)

in reality? just two actors navigating a mess of public expectation, personal comfort, and a fandom that remembers every eye twitch from 2022.

especially after the SAG awards, with how carefully timed the posts and pap shots were.

anyway. sorry if this sounds tired. i’ve read so many versions of this take over the past year, i think my brain now defaults to irony or forced neutrality. at some point, i turned into the grumpy girl who thinks everyone’s overreacting.

[error404empathy]

And what do you think should be done? Not ship Lukola??

who told you that nonsense????

we ship for our own joy. whatever the truth is, whatever they’re hiding, we’re clearly the engine of this whole thing. even if they pretend we’re not.

we’re not the problem. we fill the gaps. we set the tone. we’re the reason someone in PR still has a job 😎

just don’t burn out. don’t turn on each other.

and yeah… i’m not immune, clearly

[error404empathy]

What PR campaign would you propose for a show with a strong fan base, if you worked at a PR firm?

oh god.

i mean, i probably wouldn’t open with my portfolio. it doesn’t exactly scream “TV PR mastermind” but i do know how to make a deck. and slide one would just say, in giant font:

YOU ARE 100% GOING TO SCREW THIS UP

in big letters. and in small print underneath: “accept it. but here are 20 common mistakes and how not to make them worse.”

because let’s be honest. you’re launching into fandom territory. you don’t need a perfect plan. you need a disaster-prep manual.

like:

1. misaligned tone between promo and story? please. they had eight Harry Potter films and a teenage audience. the number of promo/story mismatches could fill several theses

2. leaving the cast to handle the backlash solo? let’s not pretend i don’t have ten annotated slides on that, courtesy of our current fandom. thank you for the material.

3. pretending social media isn’t part of the narrative now? fans are trained in digital forensics. if the TikTok team and the press tour don’t tell the same story, they will notice. and they will build their own.

etc.

obviously, this would all go better if i had, you know, basic info. genre? target audience? platform tone?

but assuming i didn’t i’d still go in with confidence, fandom receipts, and one clear thesis: the more emotional the IP, the more emotional the backlash when you misread the room.

no guarantee they’d hire me. but they’d absolutely remember the pitch. 🙃

[error404empathy]

i feel like my question is going to have a very obvious "they want to build separate careers and not just be this one bridgerton entity forever" but still want to open it out there.

i got into the fandom at the height of the press tour last year. during that time those who were around since day one and fans of the two (and followed their socials) saw that they posted about each other ALL the time, during s1, s2, and s3 filming, and they all knew he was in a very public relationship with his previous girlfriend (one he did openly confirm to the entire world in interviews, etc). but that didn't stop them from acting all bff on social, being spotted in tons of behind-the-scenes clips from all three seasons attached to the hip and giggling away, at public events, at their private wrap parties and so forth.

in s1 and s2 off-screen sharing they of course were selling polin but not to the intense extent they did for s3, but they still showed off how close they were in real life. and again, the real life shipping began early on with some fans when they knew he was in a confirmed relationship with jade. and that didn't still stop either of them from their questionably unhinged bffness during those years.

so i guess my question is, if they acted like this without too much care in the world all those years, and he had a girlfriend that entire time, why the fuck are they radio silent now, especially if they've been seen so many times with partners?

followup question to this - do you think what went down at the SAG awards caused them to stop being seen in public altogether after because even the general audience again (not just fans and shippers, but EVERYONE) began to question what their relationship was and they panicked? and you mention people magazine as part of the pr push - did you think it a bit odd that their sag awards coverage kicked off with the polin reunion caption and photo when there were so many more a-list celebs in attendance and in that recap?

every time i write one of these, i lose 1 HP and gain 3 conspiracy points🙈

i joke, but let’s break it down properly:

so...

📌past behavior ≠ current strategy back in s1 and s2, luke and nicola acted like chaotic best friends online, even while he was publicly dating someone else. it felt organic, maybe just easy. the stakes were low. the fandom was small.

but after the s3 promo exploded, the tone changed. everything started carrying weight. fan narratives, media attention, emotional overinvestment. so the team pulled back.

📌post-season silence isn’t drama, it’s protocol we didn’t get régé and phoebe after s1 we didn’t get jonathan and simone after s2 warm interviews? sure. real post-season interaction? not really. that’s not a falling out. that’s the model.

📌SAG: misstep or meltdown the sag awards felt like a glitch in the matrix. too much chemistry, not enough consistency. if it was spontaneous, it broke the distancing strategy. if it was a throwback tactic, it was poorly timed.

+ people magazine and algorithm bait of course they ran with the “polin reunion” headline. when a fandom’s loud, emotional, and always online? any headline with their favorites is easy traffic.

As I said in the last post, that spike in attention likely sent the team scrambling and triggered strategic distancing

silence doesn’t fix anything. but it delays the fallout. and sometimes, that’s all they want.

[error404empathy]

I love your blog. It has really got me thinking but not changing my mind.

Could we talk about the SAG awards regarding Nic and Luke, Watching them was like going back in time to the World Tour. The chemistry was amazing. They were so happy and looked so like a couple.

In your opinion do you think this was under the influence of PR or was this real ?

Or was this a PR nightmare?

What do you think they were trying to tell us. Even the press and interviewers were picking up on the chemistry.

I loved that night and it definitely had the fan engagement buzzing. Until a picture of Antonia in an elevator was leaked!!

thanks!

if it was strategic, it clashed directly with the distancing that followed. if it wasn’t, it just showed how unstable and reactive the narrative had become. (yes, that’s exactly how I’d phrase it in a very boring final report). but either way, the chemistry was undeniable.😍

and? that’s what made it so striking. we were lucky to get a season 3 that felt this alive. not just because of the plot, but because something about them clicked. and it’s hard not to get swept up in that, even when you know better. 🤍💛

so maybe “what were they trying to tell us?” isn’t the question. it’s what they accidentally told us and how quickly that moment was buried.

the elevator photo, the shift in tone, the sudden silence - none of it brought clarity. it looked like damage control.

the SAG moment did exactly what press events are meant to do: get people talking again, bring the buzz back, remind fans why they showed up in the first place. but it also showed how volatile things get when you rely on chemistry without a clear strategy.

📌and that wave of attention? probably pushed the team straight into overcorrection mode: separate locations, new couple sightings, radio silence.

[error404empathy]

🙃 thanks, i guess?

not to be dramatic but... who are you people and why are you following me? i was planning to overshare in peace, for like 3.5 people (including myself).

instead, I see comments. people being kind. I don’t know what to do with that, but thanks. probably.

this blog started as a personal archive. it still is. if I spiral, it’s strictly for academic purposes.

and thanks to everyone who sends questions. not just theories, but your own takes, doubts, chaos. didn’t think I’d be attempting balanced thoughts at 1am while dragging them out of my media-fried brain.

you made me think. against my better judgment. with respect 💛🤍

[error404empathy]

So I’ve read through lots of your posts recently. And I’m confused. Do you think A and L / N and J are PR relationships or not?

I know this sounds painfully obvious, but the truth doesn’t really matter here. What matters is what they want us to believe.

Take me, for example. I have a personal brand. My Instagram shows movies, friends, long walks, the usual chaos. But when it comes to my private life? Almost nothing. I’ve been in a relationship for three years. I moved to another country to be with him. But online? He doesn’t exist. My friends joked I relocated for an imaginary man. My mom, on the other hand, knows everything. But that’s a different kind of PR. 🫣

Or there’s a friend I follow in fashion. Very online. And yet I only recently found out she’s been married for over a year and already has a baby. Was it fake? No. Just private. Just selective. Just not our business.

So no, I don’t think everything we analyze is fiction. Maybe it started one way and shifted. Maybe it’s real, maybe not, maybe a bit of both.

But I’m not under their bed. I’m watching the rollout🤷‍♀️

[error404empathy]

I think what is most confusing to me as a fan who has entertained some of the more tinfoil hat theories is how n/l or their teams often seem to forget that, for at least the deep fandom, the internet is forever. I agree that most of their strategy here is targeted at the GA and maybe raising their profiles to other audiences, but the fandom are the ones who will fly to NYC or London and put butts in seats for their theatrical debuts. Casual fans and GA will go if they happen to be in the neighborhood.

I want so badly for this to be a big win for Luke but right now his ticket sales #s are a little weak. Many nights are available with many tickets and A is just so so unlikable; even to the GA. There is something about her when she’s at events with him- maybe it’s the stilted body language. Maybe it’s the way each event turns into promo for her with solo pics (often the only one at the event doing so). Maybe it’s her overall demeanor.

But the people who are going to be die-hard fans, even if they aren’t invested in the Lukola ship, don’t like her. And the online piece is part of it. She was caught running a few of her own fan pages online (with receipts) along with creating an X acct and bullying fandom people online.

I’ll agree people are unnecessarily harsh to her but honestly it comes off as unhinged behavior on her part to bully his most loyal fan base. And the DM story that ran last year and was seen by most in the Luke fan base about her and her mom liking bodyshaming articles about Nic sticks with people. Most fans, even those who aren’t loyal shippers, remember that.

For J’s part, people didn’t even have to look hard in his tags to find things that conflict with him being in a relationship with N during the timeline they are trying to push. And his friend group doesn’t help because a lot of their posting toward him contradicts what she’s trying to push.

I’ll say this: I think more people try to be happy for N bc she came off as the “injured party” following part 2 papgate, even if that wasn’t actually the case.

And then, while L is trying to market to his (primarily female) audience, his gf drops him on her grid for the first time but doesn’t just do that, she does it with her entire rear end in the shot, and for those following, his young nephew is supposed to be there getting a full view of it? Most women get the ick from that.

It feels again like they’re trying to make fetch happen and it isn’t happening, at least for his current fans. Maybe he’ll get a bunch of new ones from House of McQueen, and maybe they’ll be more thrilled at this content. But for the primarily female Bridgerton fandom? Even the ones who aren’t loyal shippers? They’re still going to get the ick.

part two. this isn’t about the posts anymore. it’s about trust (and how fast it eroded)

the first part was about media patterns. this one hits differently. we’re not talking about blurry stories or aesthetic choices anymore. we’re talking about emotional dissonance and the slow unraveling of a bridge - not between two people, but between brand and audience, actor and fan, story and belief.

you’re not imagining the mismatch. none of it feels aligned. not the visuals. not the tone. not the body language. especially not the fan response, which matters a lot when you're selling tickets to a live theatre production.

🧠 emotional memory outlasts media spin. people aren’t reacting to a single post. they’re reacting to a pattern that doesn’t line up anymore.

you’re not imagining it. you’re responding to a promise that’s no longer being kept

so what changed? or rather what fell apart?

🧩 he’s not aligning the message with the market. luke’s early image wasn’t just about looks or casting. it was warmth, softness, sincerity. the good one™. what followed? six months of near-silence, followed by photos that didn’t match the original tone. a brand built on emotional intimacy now paired with visible emotional distance. and no, people aren’t mad he’s in a relationship. they’re confused why the rollout felt like… well, that.

why does it feel like a weird theater?

not because it’s fake. but because it’s incoherent and clumsy.

🔍 PR relationship? nope. not enough control. not enough polish. not even the right tone. if it were a staged romance, it would look way more intentional than this. 🔍 real couple, but he struggles with public dynamics? maybe. especially if he’s introverted. but then… why the overload? why the repeated hints? why keep the visibility just high enough to get noticed? 🔍 a diversion strategy? now we’re getting warmer. here’s the girlfriend. you get it. stop asking. but that’s not connection. that’s redirection. and now the audience is digging even deeper.

fans disengage, not with drama, but with silence the issue isn’t tin hats. the issue is that the official version is weaker than the fanmade ones. and people drift, not because they hate it, but because they’ve lost the plot.

the rise of conspiracy is a failure of coherence fans aren’t delusional. they’re building narratives in response to the collapse of one. silence became the system. chemistry felt one-sided. and the collective instinct kicked in: explain it, or protect the version we loved.

conspiracy is what happens when clarity is replaced by chaos

nic, antonia, and the illusion of resolution

nic’s likes = “we’re good” antonia’s comments = “i’m not the villain” luke’s silence = “anything i say will make it worse” none of this builds a narrative. it just pauses escalation. like taping over a cracked window and hoping it holds.

“but his career isn’t suffering”. true. but loyalty is

on paper, everything’s fine. contracts are active. brands are still here. no scandals, no cancellations. but emotionally? fan trust is leaking. the “open and kind” image is eroding. people aren’t mad. they’re just… elsewhere.

professionally, he’s stable. but emotionally? the foundation’s crumbling

so why don’t they fix it?

because fixing it wasn’t the goal. the real PR tasks are: don’t break contracts. don’t stir more chaos. don’t fuel another cycle. don’t say too much. survive the mess, not solve it. the fandom? not the current target. bridgerton’s done. the focus is now theater, boss, fashion press. Old fans? Present, but no longer the priority.

what does the strategist see?

(a more adequate person than me)

the client’s still working. the press hasn’t turned. no crisis, no headlines. and confusion… isn’t considered a catastrophe.

so where does that leave us?

this was never just about the posts. not even about the relationship. it’s about the empty space where a story used to be.

you wanted clarity - you got ambiguity. you wanted something real - you got distancing signals and PR delay tactics.

and no, people aren’t obsessed. they just don’t like being gaslit by silence.

it’s not about romance. it’s about broken narrative contracts

(more to come)

[error404empathy]

Curious as to what you think about Antonia’s social media activity.

To me she doesn’t seem to use her account like an influencer. The posts are mainly about her vacations or stylised pictures of her life. She doesn’t post much about her modelling and dance jobs and there’s not really anything that clearly shows Luke or that they are in a relationship.

I do believe she is in a relationship with Luke but it seems they have decided (or he has requested) to keep the relationship “private” and off social media. However it never really was private, I wasn’t around at the start but I’ve heard about the hints to Luke in her posts (a hairy arm/leg), the in style matching posts and she never made her Instagram private during the Bridgerton press run.

At the same time it doesn’t seem like she is trying to leverage the influx of followers from Luke. She hasn’t tried to endear herself to his fans with her posts. They are typical for Instagram (ie. vacation pics, curated lifestyle pics of herself) but it doesn’t give anything of her personality for fans to warm up to.

She also doesn’t seem to be using the followers to get more modelling or dance work as she doesn’t really post her jobs and even when she went to BOSS, F1 or Baftas etc she didn’t post any (she did have solo shots without Luke that could be posted).

It almost makes me feel she is just someone like most of us who have Instagram just posting whenever they like and only life highlights who has unfortunately stumbled into this fandom mess due to dating Luke.

But if so, why not make the Instagram private and limit it to friends/family? That would eliminate having to deal with the trolls/haters and she can post whatever she wants in peace. And why comment on Nic’s post (my view is she would know what the fandom is like by now)? Why comment on Nic’s when she has never commented on Luke’s not even his work posts like HoM.

The whole thing just puzzles me.

i wish i could answer this question like a professional, calmly, objectively, armed with facts, logic, and neutral phrasing. but let’s be real: i’m just like the rest of you. i watched. i read. i stared at blurry screenshots and tried to make sense of it all. and yes. there’s another angle to consider [this message deserves its own archive].

and then, somewhere in the middle of my day off, i caught myself walking through a shopping mall mentally mapping her instagram activity like it was a cold war psy-op. 🕵️‍♀️ the power of internet anons. truly unmatched.

but here’s the thing: i try to look at it like i would with any brand story. not by counting rings on fingers or decoding sunglasses reflections ... but by asking: what are they trying to show me? what patterns repeat? what tone are they setting?

this isn’t about being right. it’s about observing how media works. especially when it gets weird.

i’m always open to being wrong. that’s half the fun. but let’s keep it a real conversation, not a comment section brawl. if you’ve got a theory, i’m all ears. if it’s just trolling... you’re gonna be disappointed. 🙃

(and yes, there will be a part two. but first things first.)

what’s going on with antonia’s instagram? a pr take

antonia doesn’t behave like an influencer. but that doesn’t mean she’s just a regular person accidentally caught in a public relationship. what we’re seeing is something quieter, and more complicated.

back in june 2024, the reaction to those pap photos was brutal. she gained followers, but not goodwill. whatever the original plan was, soft launch, romantic nod, curated intimacy. it backfired. what followed wasn’t privacy. it was retreat. her instagram reflected that. posts disappeared, visual hints were edited out, the grid went quiet. if you’ve worked in PR, you’ve seen this before: someone tested the waters and pulled back when the burn got too hot.

in early 2025, something shifted. she didn’t return with a story. she returned with presence. we started seeing her everywhere: fashion events, press-heavy appearances, brand activations, not as a girlfriend in the background, but styled, visible, documented. there was a clear pivot toward public visibility, possibly to support future casting or professional positioning. and yet… her own account said nothing. no behind-the-scenes. no tags. no campaigns. no context. just aesthetic fragments.

there’s a visible timeline. a slow arc of increasing visibility, not random, not organic, but sequenced. this aligns with what we’d typically call strategic passivity: presence without narrative, visibility without accountability. a quiet rollout, likely aimed at soft brand positioning, but one that never fully landed. the rhythm was there, but the story wasn’t. and in this industry, that disconnect rarely goes unnoticed.

why take this route?

most likely:

a private compromise: you don’t post us, i won’t confirm us

or quiet damage control: appear, but don’t provoke

or brand fatigue: public pushback is too high to sustain momentum

but the most plausible scenario? a stalled rollout the intent was likely there, but momentum got lost what remains is a patchwork of gestures rather than a strategy not a plan, but a holding pattern

and here’s the thing: curated ambiguity only works short-term. eventually, the absence of emotional context becomes a message in itself. people fill in the blanks. they theorize. they spiral. in fashion and celebrity PR, this is known as XYZ logic when ambiguity is sustained too long, narrative ownership shifts to the audience (xyz = when X fades, Y overreacts, and Z loses control)

the antonia problem

she’s not offering a counter-narrative, not softening the edges, not opening a window. she’s not trying to charm the audience, but she’s not leaving the room either. and that’s what makes her presence so frustrating: not for what it is, but for what it refuses to become.

if she posted more, she’d be accused of manipulating. if she posted less, she’d be accused of hiding. by staying in the middle, which she consistently has, she gets blamed for the ambiguity itself.

so here we are. she’s visible enough to keep the discourse going, not visible enough to shift it.

this isn’t influencer behavior, but it’s not unintentional either. the timing, the solo getty images, the absence of luke on her grid, they all point to controlled visibility without coherence. a rollout with no spark. a campaign without a cause. she’s not a character, not a defined persona, not even a consistent tone. just a presence with no narrative structure around it. she’s not a mystery. she’s just there, and that’s why it drives people insane.

tl;dr (but not really):

yes, she knows how the game works

no, she’s not playing it well

yes, she shows up at the right moments

no, she’s not giving anyone a reason to care

yes, fans are dramatic

no, they’re not imagining it

this isn’t branding. this isn’t privacy. this is what happens when a slow-burn strategy burns out halfway through.

i’m not done... part two is coming.

[error404empathy]

I guess I don’t see Nicola as being ambiguous with Jake. I think she has made it very clear she is dating him. Same with Luke and A. It’s clear they are dating. The difference I see is that Luke is clearly using his relationship to get press whereas Nicola just seems to be showing Jake in her day to day life (and I’m sure a staged pap walk here or there but certainly not the circus show Luke has staged).

Nicola and Jake can share eachother on their SM and comment on eachothers posts freely, where Luke can do a staged photoshoot at a big event but still won’t allow comments. And I have no doubt A wants to comment given her SM activity and her commenting on Nicola’s post.

wait wait wait. let’s hit pause for a second.

you’re not wrong. but you’re also proving the point. if you see it as clear, that’s great. but not everyone does, and that gap in perception? that’s the whole issue.

this blog isn’t about digging for what’s true behind the scenes. it’s about how things land publicly. and when the tone is uneven or the rollout feels hesitant, people will react in all sorts of ways, from “this feels real” to “i don’t buy it at all.”

the nic & jake rollout may feel calm and organic to some. to others, it feels vague or inconsistent. same with luke and antonia: for some, it’s “clearly dating” for others, “too polished to be natural.” neither side is necessarily wrong, they’re just reacting to different cues.

and yeah, the comparison is inevitable. that’s how fandom works. we read into comment sections, captions, pap photos, vibes. but it’s less about what they’re doing, and more about how people interpret it.

bottom line? we’re not judging intent. we’re tracking reception. and that’s where the ambiguity lives, in the space between what’s posted and what’s perceived.

[error404empathy]

Hi! I’m the anon who sent the ask about Nic and J and why the Australia pics felt more like a ploy for brands than for fans.

Thank you for answering my ask. You brought up a ton of great points and I especially liked the one about how perhaps Nic is not selling a relationship, but a lifestyle. In my previous ask, I said that Nic’s persona is that she’s a beautiful smart actress with a great heart, but there’s one more element to her public image, I forgot to mention. She is… Relatable. So the selling a lifestyle theory makes sense because, she often shows us small curated snippets of her private life such as pics of her with friends, pics of her with her brother and sister, pics of her in her pj drinking from two drinks at once, etc. So with that, Jake doesn’t technically feel as jarring and yet… He does. I think the reason why J’s inclusion felt so weird is the ambiguity. No matter how bold Nic and J’s next move is, we never get the one piece of detail, the one clear confirmation to finally put this whole thing to rest. If I compare the two with a freshly established celebrity couple like Megan Thee Stallion and Klay Thompson, it becomes much clearer. Recently, Megan rolled the red carpet with her boyfriend, NBA player, Klay. One thing we witness between the two is the display of affection. It was nothing big, just him stroking her waist. Another thing we witness is Megan talking to interviewers about the soirée and how her boyfriend is so kind and how she’s happy to be with him. Klay does the same thing talking about how happy he is to be with Megan and how amazing she is. The next day, Megan posts a video of the two working out. The rollout was clear, concise, leaving no place for ambiguity. Nic and J on the other hand, absolutely no display of affection or intimacy. The next day, not a single post by Nicola, it’s as if the night never happened. With how much she displays this guy, I would have expected by now, a clearer confirmation. Now going back to Nicola being branded as #relatable. Her personal life, at least what we see of it, becomes a way to generate a false sense of intimacy with her fans. A glimpse into her life. A chance to partake into her lifestyle. Looking at it that way, the ambiguity between Nic and J’s relationship status because a positive, rather it was intentional or not. The lack of confirmation leaves space for interpretation. If the lifestyle you wanna project into Nic is that she’s in a romantic relationship with J, you can, there’s enough of a blank page to write that down. If the lifestyle you wanna see for Nic is that her and J are just friends hanging out, having a good time. There’s plenty of material to support that claim. At the end of the day, it’s all just projection to make Nicola relatable to us.

And of course no matter what’s going on, brands do love this.

thank you again. seriously, reading your thoughts has been a pleasure.

i’ve said it before, but ambiguity like this rarely works the way people hope. sure, it keeps people guessing. sure, we’re all still here. but long-term? it creates more noise than clarity. and once you lose control of the narrative, the audience fills in the blanks in ways you can’t steer.

so no, i don’t think this was ever about “selling a relationship.” not clearly, anyway. and that’s the issue. the rollout never commits — not to romance, not to friendship, not even to mystery. it just... lingers.

the lifestyle angle makes sense. Nic’s always been good at blending glam and relatability. not in a fake way, just... she knows how to read a room. her presence feels natural, even when it’s curated. and yeah, compare that to Luke and Antonia. same ambiguity, way worse reaction (sorry for bringing them up here).

but when jake enters the picture, the tone shifts. not because he’s awful, just because nothing ever lands. theories like “just a friend” or “not straight” aren’t new, but they reveal a lot. not about him, but about what the audience is trying to fix.

he’s not the villain. but he’s also not the hero of her story. he breaks the tone. visually, narratively, emotionally. he just doesn’t fit the version of nicola people had in mind.

because brand tone matters. credibility matters. and you can’t fake either.

maybe this wasn’t a PR move at all. maybe it’s just someone with a strong voice, doing what she always does. only this time, the context made it weird.

[error404empathy]

Lately, there have been a ton of anonymous lawyers and PR folks on Tumblr. Do you get the feeling that's kind of stupid and there's no reason to put your trust in those kinds of specialists?

do you think we have a group chat or something? (technically i do, the lawyers mostly remind us how we could get sued for wording like that)

look, you don’t need to trust anonymous specialists. honestly, you don’t need to trust non-anonymous ones either. i work in marketing, and half the time, colleagues from other departments stop by to explain how they’d handle PR. if only someone asked. 🙄

my favorite workplace quote: everyone understands marketing better than the marketing department

but seriously, trust is up to you. having real-world experience doesn’t always mean it’s relevant experience. we all might know the basics, but portfolios and case history speak louder than opinions.

i’m not claiming to be an expert. this blog is just a mix of:

chaotic fandom memory

actual marketing work

and a very specific obsession with how campaigns unfold

plus the occasional need to talk about it with someone

[error404empathy]

You bring up many good points about trolling and fan exhaustion. I can only speak for myself but some of my frustrations come from how so many women make Nicola’s accomplishments about a man. For me, I kind of cracked when every time Nicola had an announcement or an award there were so many comments inserting luke into it or saying he deserved it too. And given the current state of the world, it just frustrated me that why can’t we just admire a woman for her accomplishments and not make it about a man. But I am learning how male centred the Polin fandom is and maybe that’s my fault for not understanding the audience and partaking in the Polin related social media.

thank you for sharing this. and yeah, i think what you’re describing is real.

as a quiet polin fan, i mostly stick to fic and art (AO3 top 20 by number of works!), and the real-life stuff never felt that relevant to me. and I usually don't write to anyone

but… i totally get why others feel differently. and yeah, the way women’s achievements get reframed through a man? painfully familiar.

in female-led fandoms, there’s often an instinct to center relationships. even at the cost of individual recognition. not because people don’t care about the work, but because we’re used to reading everything through emotional dynamics. success becomes part of a narrative arc.

and if a man’s involved? suddenly he’s the headline. she wins an award and people say “he must be so proud.” like her success only becomes real once it’s reflected through him. not malicious, maybe. just… deeply wired.

so yeah. thank you for saying it out loud. that’s not necessarily bad. just… familiar.

[error404empathy]

“Trolling, Disappointment, and the Mechanics of Outrage”

hi. even my fairly boring blog occasionally attracts dramatic questions. and declarations that i’m either too biased or not dramatic enough. but i’ve been roasting myself longer than you’ve had questions.

(and those are just the highlights)

if you're here waiting for a takedown or a moral verdict, you're probably in the wrong place.

this isn’t a reaction post. so yes, i found an excuse to write another long, boring post. obviously. it’s about the mechanics: trolling, outrage, and what that says about fandom - and about us.

so no, i won’t debate the ethics of rustic influencer nudity or judge a british man i’ve never met for dating someone who posts her own bathtub pics. especially when it’s the same recycled set of stories, circling back every few months with no new facts and even fewer stakes.

but i will talk about trolling. about disappointment. and about why moral panic spreads faster than nuance.

did i promise you an article? and yes. it’ll be boring, too long, and full of footnotes. if you’re going to hate-read me, i might as well give you homework.

🔍 1. The Art of Trolling (and Why It Works So Well)

Trolling isn’t new. But it’s evolved from petty forum baiting to a kind of dark performance art. The goal is rarely to convince. It’s to provoke, exhaust, and dominate the narrative.

In fandom spaces, trolling can take on a strangely personal flavor. Not just “you’re wrong,” but “you need to feel bad about being wrong.” And the line between “disagreement” and “deliberate agitation” gets blurry fast.

Some of it is classic:

👻 anonymous accounts baiting replies 🎯 repetitive moral accusations without context 🪝 loaded questions designed to demand reaction (“Do you think it’s okay for...?”)

But a lot of it isn’t about the topic at all. It’s about control.

🧠 Why people troll — and why it works

Psychological research gives us a few clues — and spoiler: it’s not about the search for truth.

1. Psychological payoff Studies link trolling behavior with traits like sadism, psychopathy, and Machiavellianism. Not as a diagnosis, but as a behavioral cluster.

“Both trolls and sadists feel sadistic glee at the distress of others. Sadists just want to have fun … and the Internet is their playground.” “Of all personality measures, sadism showed the most robust associations with trolling … the relationship was specific to trolling behavior.” — Buckels et al., Personality and Individual Differences (2014)

Some trolls just enjoy the emotional disruption they cause. It’s not about being heard. it’s about being noticed. And irritating others becomes the reward.

🔁 2. Cognitive dissonance relief Trolling can serve as a way to offload emotional discomfort - especially when fans feel confused, betrayed, or let down.

“Trolling allows people to express their frustrations, anger, and annoyance in an anonymous way.” — A Qualitative Analysis of Internet Trolling (2022), summary, p.3

In emotionally charged spaces, trolling provides a pressure valve. The target doesn’t matter - the relief does.

⚡ 3. False empowerment

In fandoms, people rarely have control over the narrative. Trolling offers a temporary sense of agency — even if that agency comes through disruption.

“Trolling [is] ...a deliberate attempt to provoke others by creating conflict and distress.” — A Qualitative Analysis of Internet Trolling (2022)

It’s not exactly productive — but for some, it feels like doing something. Especially when nothing else is working.

🫂 4. In-group performance

Much of what looks like argument is actually performance. It’s not about you — it’s about the audience.

“To grandstand is to turn one's contribution to public discourse into a vanity project.” — Graso et al. (2017), Moral Grandstanding in Public Discourse

Trolling, in this case, becomes a way to gain status — not resolution.

💥 2. What Happens in Fandom Doesn’t Stay There

I’ve written before about the art of provocation - how well-crafted PR language walks the line between teasing and manipulating. But trolling takes it further. It’s not trying to sell a product or build hype. It’s emotional bait.

Because in fandom spaces, the battleground isn’t usually facts. it’s morality.

Not “did this happen,” but

“is he creepy?” “is she manipulative?” “are you enabling abuse by supporting this?”

These aren’t questions. They’re moral framing devices loaded to provoke, not invite discussion.

And they’re designed to spread:

Reposted with captions like “no because THIS”

Dissected in 90-second TikToks and 20-minute YouTube essays

Weaponized against creators, actors, or even random mutuals

The more performative it gets, the less it has to do with whatever actually happened. It stops being about a PR rollout or a couple and turns into a loyalty test.

That’s why trolling doesn’t stay in the replies. It escalates. It spills into tags, DMs, and anonymous asks. It thrives on engagement, and fandom is very good at feeding it.

🌀 3. The Real Plot Twist: It’s Not About Luke and Nicola

It never is.

Every fandom argument eventually circles back to this: someone feels let down. Not by facts. By how it made them feel.

What we’re seeing isn’t really about Luke or Nicola. Or even about who posted what bathtub picture. It’s about disappointment.

The kind that creeps in when the version of someone we built in our heads starts to crack. And we don’t know what to do with that frustration. So it spills out. Into tags, comments, anonymous asks.

🔍 A 2022 study on parasocial collapse outlines fan types: from “loyalists” to “justice seekers.” The biggest flips often come from those who cared the most. Loud defense becomes loud betrayal. Same emotion.

Some of the loudest trolls were once the most devoted defenders. They didn’t change. They flipped.

And in fandom, that flip often becomes a performance. A way to reclaim power. “I was loyal. Now I’ve seen the truth. And I’ll make sure everyone else sees it too.”

But it’s not really about truth. It’s about resolving the tension between who we thought our fave was and who they seem to be now.

👵 4. So what, you think you’re better than everyone else?

Absolutely not.

p.s. Yes, I’m too old for this. That’s why I’m here I’ve lived through fandom meltdowns way messier than this. Back when I had more time, more feelings, and fewer boundaries.

If I find myself spiraling over fandom drama or moral outrage, it usually says more about how burned out I am than about whoever the drama is about. Sometimes it’s conscious. Sometimes it’s not.

And if you think I’m here to lecture you, I’m not. I’m here because this chaos, for better or worse, feels familiar. Not because it’s healthy. Because I know what I’m doing.

Fandom saved me from worse things. Alcohol. Cults. And apparently it somehow saves you. Whatever you do here. However messily. 💛🤍

[error404empathy]

🗂️ masterpost / promo, parasocials & pr panic

🙋 new here? start with the author’s take: “is it PR or not?” → a personal post short answer: truth doesn’t matter. what matters is what they want us to see.

hi. welcome. we like theories here. we like overthinking. we don’t blame fans for being confused — confusion is often part of the design. and we definitely don’t blame the actors.

this blog is where i spiral about promo timelines, soft launches, parasocial messes and PR moves that feel like they weren’t approved by anyone over the age of 25.

i don’t claim to know the truth — i just pretend i’m a mid-level strategist with too much free time and a document full of blurry screenshots. sometimes i’m right. mostly, it’s just for fun.

✨ we talk about ships, launches, media logic, narrative vibes and emotional clickbait. ❌ we don’t dunk on other fans, we don’t dig into personal fandom drama, and we don’t assume bad intent from people doing their jobs. 📎 mostly, we just keep asking: what are they trying to show us — and why did it turn out like this?

scroll down for links, thoughts, and maybe a few regrets. (or don’t. i’m not your manager.)

PR & Rollout Logic

📋 “confusion isn’t a strategy” how I’d fix the rollout, or at least stop making it worse. and admit it’s not all a disaster (but realistically, I’d just cry in a Google Doc)

🛠️ “good intentions, chaotic execution” messy rollouts and why fans end up writing the script

🔍 “accidental chaos is more common than you think” premiere night, blackgrid chaos and the silence that followed

🔥 “clickbait, chaos, and the art of professional provocation” breaking down the Telegraph’s piece how pros pour fuel on the fire, and why the smartest move is not to take the bait

Launches, Relationships & Pap Media

📋 “did they call the paps?” decoding staged exclusives, media playbooks and what PR really wants us to see

🎯 “for fans or for brands?” (NEW!) Nic & Jake: a PR lens on the rollout, the branding logic, and why it still doesn’t land with fans (part 1 / part 2)

🍷 “We Need to Talk About the Neighbors” parasocial meltdowns & PR chaos why everyone’s delusional, and how bad promo makes good detectives

🎭 “awkward ≠ fake, but someone is still curating” lukola rollout logic, Antonia visibility & why no one’s covering our breakdowns

🪞 “if a bomb ever drops, I’ll applaud the setup” lukola ambiguity, promo fatigue & moral warfare in the tags

🧩 “they’ll stabilize eventually” season 3 fallout, brand logic & Nic’s steady climb wasn’t expected, but it made sense. reactive PR always shows, but it could’ve been worse

Fan Reactions, Conspiracy & Silence

🧠 “this isn’t about the posts anymore” (NEW!) Antonia’s Instagram, curated ambiguity and why trust is gone for good a breakdown of her passive visibility arc and the quiet failure of rollout logic. fans didn’t turn away because of romance, they turned away from a story that never arrived. trust cracked, silence stayed, and no one seems interested in fixing it (part 1 / part 2)

🗃️ “editing the same draft without ever publishing it” first impressions, vanished posts and why ambiguity leaves an aftertaste

🌀 “not made for tinhats, but feeding them anyway” how vague rollouts and disappearing posts unintentionally fuel conspiracy waves. (part 1 / part 2)

📉 “it played out exactly as expected” soft launches, career stalls & the hype machine trap what happens when your show sells chemistry, not careers — and no one controls the narrative

🕳️ “used for what, exactly?” fan rage as fuel, fake momentum and what happens when chaos isn’t a strategy

🤍 “save the drama for the PR team” burnout, blocking wars & why curating your feed is self-care now

🎭 “SAG: PR win or PR panic?” (NEW!) A look at the post-season silence after Season 3 (yes, it’s a pattern), the unexpected buzz from the SAG Awards, and the clumsy PR clean-up that followed (part 1 / part 2)

📓 field notes

a casual log of fandom patterns, parasocial research & thoughts that don't fit in neat theories. (in progress)

📓 field notes, vol. 1 starting to think this fandom chaos might actually be… interesting?

📓 field notes, vol. 2 “Trolling, Disappointment, and the Mechanics of Outrage” what trolling teaches us about fandom (and ourselves)

———

💬 “not a theory, just a reply” here’s where I answer if I’m Lukola, PR, bored, or all three. and other boring answers. #inbox chaos

[error404empathy]

How long do you think it will take for our fandom to open a PR agency?

maybe we open a detective agency first?👀 you know... match nail polish across timelines, identify locations by floor tiles, figure out who that hoodie actually belonged to. just the basics.

then we pivot to PR. depends on the model though — are we talking registered agency or just vibes and spreadsheets? because if it’s the second one, we’re already in business. there’s enough of us to fill an org chart.

some of you are running full-blown comms audits in the tags at 2 a.m. we have working theories, media calendars, crisis protocols.

we’ve cracked all the formulas for a soft launch. add one ambiguously cropped photo for extra intrigue. leave one suspiciously warm comment for your boyfriend’s coworker. etc.

wait.👆

we have actual numbers on engagement. comment spikes, follower growth, story views. you have no idea how much free labor this fandom generates. 🤭

[error404empathy]

Hi! I’ve been enjoying your blog and am happy to find another blog that can show some nuance for this whole situation.

I’ve been thinking and I would like your opinion on this as someone who works in pr.

I think what I find odd about this whole thing, especially with Nicola and J, is why the weird push? Pr stands for Public Relations so it’s about the image the celebrity projects to the public. Nicola’s pr has been phenomenal thus far and many people love her. She’s politically engaged, seems to like to uplift women, lgbtq folks and, all and all , the oppressed. It’s shown from what we hear from interviews, her social media and the shows she chooses to be part of. Like her being in the new season of I Am, which has a strong feminist tone and I am looking forward to seeing her in. Her fans follow her for her sweet heart, her great acting and beauty. She never came across as someone who makes men her entire personality. So that’s why J comes across as a stain on the portrait. I’m not saying that J is ruining her image (he doesn’t have that power), but I’m still thinking about when Nic posted this cryptic photo of her and him in that hotel room to her story and then followed by posting him in her Australia tourism photodump. When she posted that story, I thought it was odd, because I thought. Who is this for? She posted to her 6 million of followers, her fans. At first I thought, is it for the Jakolas? I don’t think so, because assessing the general consensus of the fandom, it’s either, they try not care and just mind their business and mostly ignore him (they’re the majority). The second part is Lukola with different degrees of investment and they don’t like him. And finally we have the Jakolas who quite frankly are a very very small portion of this fandom. So I don’t think we could say she posted this story for her fans and definitely not for the general public, because they don’t care. So all I’m left with, is that she posted it for brands. Rather we want to admit it or not, Nicola is an actress as well as an influencer. The Australia vacay was still an advertisement opportunity. So the portrait of just a girl enjoying her vacay and displaying her healthy relationships (whatever the nature of it is), I assume is definitely what brands would like. The Australia pics were literally an ad for Australia tourism. People “exploiting” their relationship for money is nothing new, but I just don’t think it suits Nic’s branding and even makes me question the validity of what I’m being presented with. I think another thing that makes it weird is how J has been presented to us. The countless pap pics, the weird social media tease, the amount of time she would post about his projects… It just felt like we were being fed an unwanted intruder. Like repeating what I said earlier. Nic’s persona has never been about men and suddenly I was being made aware of that guy. It felt weird. Then the cryptic Instagram story came out and I was even more in the blue, because I was thinking is this a public relationship? Is she trying to pivot to being a celebrity making her relationship a part of her lore? Then on J’s part, there’s the whole thing of him posting HER announcements before she gets the chance. He did it for the Bafta and even now. There’s overall a feeling of imbalance in which he definitely seems like he’s using her fame to make himself known. I feel like if they would have been less public about this “relationship”, I would have been more prone to believe in its veracity. To the point that I could even go as far as to say that they are not dating. I just don’t believe they are. From Nicola, I sense this weird wishy-washyness of both making him public, but at the same time not truly confirming anything. I could take those Australia pics as just friends hanging out. Friends hang out together in vacations all the time.

anon, thank you. genuinely. for the thoughtful ask. i’ve been thinking along similar lines, and you articulated it really well. so here’s my take: part PR lens, part late-night spiral.

i’m usually annoyingly cautious about this stuff. i don’t think the plan was ever to highlight the relationship that much. just some messy damage control after season 3 premiered. nic was giving interviews about how exhausting it is when women aren’t seen as separate from men. and then... came the rollout.

a soft confirmation. just enough to quiet the questions. the kind of thing you post so people stop asking why you’re still single at every family dinner. (except in her case, it’s for 6 million people. not just my mom.)

and yeah, it’s very her to support her friends. he did the same. in their circle, that kind of thing seems normal. but we don’t have to act like we’re watching a love story unfold.

the brand theory makes a lot of sense. the australia posts, the photodump pacing, the “organic” moments that read like recycled ad copy. influencer logic, dressed up as intimacy.

so maybe the goal wasn’t to sell a relationship. just to pitch a lifestyle. and the more i think about it, the more i’m convinced this story was never really meant for fans. (i know i’ve said that before. but it’s becoming my favorite theory.)

he never quite fit the narrative. just drifted into frame and stayed. and now everyone’s using the setup to their own advantage. maybe fair. maybe not.

not that it’s fake. but that they’re all trying too hard to make it feel real. maybe that’s why there are so many theories. none of them fully land, but each of them makes a little too much sense.

maybe the plot twist never existed. maybe we’re just watching a highlight reel of people keeping up appearances and calling it a story.

so here we are. overthinking the fourth repost of the same photo, waiting for a plot twist that was never in the script, and still hoping it’ll somehow make sense the next time.