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twin quasars of rock (x) (x)

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when i say community

i mean staying with the victims of violence until the emts get there

i mean not letting the cops get them alone even though you just met

i mean carrying around extra pain and allergy meds not just for yourself, but in case anyone else needs them too

i mean giving them to anyone regardless of if you actually like them as a person

i mean password sharing and spreading links to your favorite pirating site

i mean helping that stranger set up a workaround for their broken computer

i mean helping them understand the weird ass language in a job application

i mean helping people understanding medical information when their doctors did a bad job

i mean letting someone sleep on your couch so they don't have to go home

i mean checking if people have rides home

i mean "text me so i know youre safe when you get home"

i mean "have you eaten today"

i mean "have you eaten enough today"

i mean "what do you want, i'm buying tonight"

i mean "hey does anyone have experience with this med, my doctor wants to put me on it but i'm not sure"

i mean "here's a zine on going off of psych meds with minimal risk"

i mean "hey you weren't at the show tonight, are you doing ok?"

i mean "i have a spare room if you ever need it"

i mean "i'm here, i promise i'm here"

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our separation has always been tough. our names, the places where we live, and... our bodies.

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the future of sound in 2020

JF: (singing) I - want to Hear - the Future - of Sound! I Want to he-ear - the Future - of SOUND! people put your hands together, for John Linnell and the future of sound! [audience cheering]

[JL playing random notes on sampler while crowd claps in beat]

JF: PEOPLE, PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER! FOR JOHN LINNELL, AND THE FUTURE OF SOOOUND! [more cheering]

JF: [JL playing the sampler in time with JF's voice] ladies and gentlemen! we're gonna break it down! and give you a preview of two thousand-twenty! when all your children! will be listening to music! that sounds exactly like this! that you really don't like!

let's cut the drums! [audience begins stomping and clapping a beat, JL continues playing the sampler under JF's voice] just break it down - to the people! the future children! and John Linnell! with the future of sound!

JL: [playing sampler in time with singing different notes] eeeeee! eee! eee! eeeooooweeeeeooooh! ohhWeeeeee! eee-awh! eeeoowweeeoohweeeeeeeeooooohh! ee, ee, ee. eeeooooooooo.

JF: in two thousand twenty! you'll be in your space car with your friends! sayin', "my kids turn me on to a lot of music, man! I love this future of sound!" John give another taste! of the music they'll pretend they like, twenty years from now!!!

JL: [playing sampler] eeeeeee! Eeeee! Iiih! Iiih! (voice crack) EEE! EeeooooohEeeeeee!

JF: this- this next part's my favourite part of the song - in the future. 'cause it sounds like it's old! in the future...

JL: which is what we're gonna be! [audience laughing]

JF: one! two! three! (singing) in the spaceship, the silver spaceship, the lion waves goodbye.

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psa

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It Is As If You Were Making Love is a bizarre little game in which you move your computer’s slider to bring it to climax (after all those visits to PronHub it’s probably the least you can do for your computer!)

Read More & Play The Full Game, Free (Browser)

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John Flansburgh Declared Dead By Idiot

[Taken from http://web.archive.org/web/20010302124314/http://sol-d.tmbg.net:80/, all misspellings and malapropisms left intact.]

On Tuesday, members of Alt.Music.Tmbg all recieved messages about the untimely death of their favourite rockstar–Mr. John Flansburgh. Some were shocked, many were skeptical, and no less than three regulars took the initiative to end their lives.

“It was a real bummer,” claimed one reader who managed to de-lurk for this interview. “I mean, John’s, like, invincible and stuff. He can’t die! We won’t let him!”

Apparently, the message of Flansburgh’s untimely demise was first posted by 12 year old Timothy Zarble. When asked how he found this information out, he replied:

“Well, I was walking along the beach when I saw him. He was just laying there, with his mouth hanging open. At first I thought that my eyes were playing tricks on me, but they weren’t! It was really Flansy. I ran over and asked him for his autograph, but he just laid there, unmoving. That’s when I got a real good look at him. He was all bloated, and there was a fly on his face. It was really gross.”

When Timothy got home he quickly posted his message to the newsgroup, where it spread aroung the internet like wildfire. Al Gore, closet TMBG fan, claimed that “…this just goes to prove how wonderful a tool the internet is. When such impotant information can reach those who need it in such a short amount of time..I..I…” At that point, Gore began to cry for dear, long-lost Mr. Flansburgh.

Flansburghologists claimed at a recent press conference that John was not dead but, in fact, pining for the fjords. This statement may have been due to the fact that they had all just gotten back from a Monty Python Convention, and thus should not be trusted. They also went on to claim that if anyone needed a good Linnellographer, their resumes were on the bulletin board by the door.

When John Flansburgh found out the news of his death, he was shocked. “I’ve never been dead before. It’s a real trip,” he said, while washing dishes. “But I guess that no one lasts forever. I mean, one minute you’re asleep on the beach, and the next your fertilizer. it happens to evryone. It will be nice to get some rest for a change.” Then he proceeded to smash every plate in his cubboard and sing a lively rendition of “He’ll Be Cummin’ Round the Mountain,” which he learned in a bar the night before. He also added that he’s not bloated–just big-boned.

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IT'S HIM part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4

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which do you prefer?💚💙

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Hungarian man, Hungary, by Isadora J.

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