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I don't know where it came from, but several years ago this idea popped into my head unbidden, and for some reason it tickles me. I don't know if it's funny, but I like it and I made it into a zine, I hope you enjoy it.

It lays out really nicely as 3-up spreads on A4 paper, so you can print, staple and fold it, then cut it into 3 zines. It made it really easy to print up 20 of them to trade at this art social thing I went to

micron, rotring and sharpie on printer paper, coloured and screentoned digitally, 2024

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Your gender is now the first randomized wikipedia article you get. No rerolls.

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*doom music starts to play* I actually kindof like scheduling these kinds of appointments now...

but seriously Fellas, don't forget to schedule a pap smear every couple of years just in case. If you still have a cervix you can still get cervical cancer. ilu

this has been a psa

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welcome to the house of leaves now I've come of age welcome to the lion's den³

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³Invoking Madness again with their song "House of Fun"⁴

⁴What, no analysis to draw from the UK no. 1 single about trying to buy condoms without getting caught? I'm almost disappointed. Reminded me of when I first bought condoms from the store. Before that, I just stole them. There was this girl I couldn't stop thinking of... [several pages]

our house... in the middle of our leaves¹

¹This is a humourous riff on the lyrics to the song "Our House" by the English ska-pop band, Madness. "Our House" is considered a working class anthem, which contrasts the bourgeoisie lifestyle of the Navidson family.²

²Alright, while the music stuff is factually correct it's still a huge stretch to connect the song and the family this way. Sometimes a corny joke is just a corny joke.

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Receiving a Werther’s Derivative from my poser grandma

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so like I said, I work in the tech industry, and it's been kind of fascinating watching whole new taboos develop at work around this genAI stuff. All we do is talk about genAI, everything is genAI now, "we have to win the AI race," blah blah blah, but nobody asks - you can't ask -

What's it for?

What's it for?

Why would anyone want this?

I sit in so many meetings and listen to genuinely very intelligent people talk until steam is rising off their skulls about genAI, and wonder how fast I'd get fired if I asked: do real people actually want this product, or are the only people excited about this technology the shareholders who want to see lines go up?

like you realize this is a bubble, right, guys? because nobody actually needs this? because it's not actually very good? normal people are excited by the novelty of it, and finance bro capitalists are wetting their shorts about it because they want to get rich quick off of the Next Big Thing In Tech, but the novelty will wear off and the bros will move on to something else and we'll just be left with billions and billions of dollars invested in technology that nobody wants.

and I don't say it, because I need my job. And I wonder how many other people sitting at the same table, in the same meeting, are also not saying it, because they need their jobs.

idk man it's just become a really weird environment.

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I am truly so sorry for your loss

Finally forced to use windows 11 after my laptop broke.

shitting wailing sneezing etc.

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When you think about the modern computer mouse is such a bizarre hodgepodge of inputs.

an x/y optical sensor

a linear wheel

two big buttons

a third secret button when you click the aforementioned wheel

and, if you're lucky:

two small buttons used almost exclusively for navigating forward and backward in webpages

a left/right tilt switch for the wheel

There's a lot of history behind the addition of these "canonical" features, but none of them really have anything to do with each other. It's like a pure, distilled monument to the past fifty years of human interface design. Every element is a reaction or a response to the others, or to sea changes in the broader tech sphere.

I dunno what else to really say, I just find this all very interesting.

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CALL ME STUPID or whatever i’m curious about how exactly vampires get hurt by the sun. is it just the sun in general, is it sunlight, is it extreme sensitivity to UV rays. basically would they be more severely hurt at certain times of day when the UV scale is higher? And I grew up with polar seasons and my NON SCIENTIFIC personal experience with it is that midnight sun feels very different to regular sunlight, it doesn’t feel warm and i’ve never been sunburnt from staying outside for 5 hours without sunscreen at night. so basically I’m doing research on the UV scale and the midnight sun on public transportation on my way to work because I wanna know if midnight sun would be less harmful to a vampire. but like it probably is not that deep at all it’s just they are night creatures sun bad.

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silly shirt by me

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with the slapping of my ass,

something Baja this way Blasts

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Demon who fucks women: Incubus Demon who fucks men: Succubus Demon who fucks up: blunderbuss

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Honestly, a not-insignificant contributing factor to my mid-20s gender crisis is that I used to think I was viscerally repulsed by playing as male characters in video games, but eventually I realised it was literally just playing as smarmy brown-haired thirtysomething dudes with an emotional range running the gamut from dull surprise to generic rage that put me off, and basically every other sort of male player character was fine. It's just that this happened to be when the Uncharted series was really taking off, so a solid 50% of all male video game protagonist fit that mould! Nathan Drake sucks so much that he made me question my gender, is what I mean to say.

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A cosmic tribute to my current favourite comment in YouTube history