ecwredditretrospective

[ecwredditretrospective]

ECW HARDCORE TV - May 4th, 1993 (05_04_93)

Welcome to Eastern Championship Wrestling! Oh boy, we're still in Eastern Championship Wrestling territory? We've got a long way to go. Anyways, we've got two title matches tonight! A rematch from last week with Stetson & Winters taking on The Super Destroyers and The Sandman will take on a new challenger in "Wildman" Sal Bellomo.

Sulli starts talking about Eddie Gilbert's announcement when he gets interrupted by ECW owner Tod Gordon. Tod says that Eddie has been his nemesis since childhood(which if he has, why did you hire him?). Gordon gets into some convoluted stuff here, throwing to a clip from last week where Gilbert was gonna throw to a clip, but Gordon interrupts him then and throws to his own clip, which Eddie doesn't stick around to watch. My head is spinning. This clip is of Terry Funk at his Double Cross ranch. Terry is perplexed because he thought Eddie was gonna meet him there so Terry could explain the rules of Texas Chain Match Massacre. Terry goes looking for Eddie and finds him at the rear end of his horse...his horse's ass. Eddie Gilbert is a horse's ass. Get it? Funk then talks to the horse's ass and explains the rules of the match...It's your basic strap match. 4 corners and all that jazz. Funk asks the horse's ass if he understands the rules, which prompts an audio drop of the horse "farting". Terry finishes off with the line "Your voice has changed but your breath is still the same."

Match: Glenn Osbourne & JT Smith vs. Don Muraco & Eddie Gilbert

ECW really is the Eddie Gilbert show early on. No one gets more TV time than Eddie Gilbert. What's that? Who's the booker you ask? It's Eddie Gilbert. To be fair he hasn't put the title on himself...But he did give himself Jimmy Snuka and Don Muraco. Muraco is really focusing on the throat of JT Smith. First with a sling shot, then dropping him on the baricade, then a spiked thumb to the throat. Osbourne has enough of that and breaks things up. So it's Eddie and Obsourne inside, with Smith, Muraco, and the ref outside...And it's time. FINALLY! There's a run-in! Some dude in a suit runs into the ring and whacks Osbourne over the head with a...telephone? Is it? Could it be?! It is! It's Paul E. Dangerously! The 5 time I-DUBYA-GEE-PEE Cham- Sorry, got caught up in the JBL of it all.

Hot Stuff gets the 1-2-3 and the crowd breaks out into "Paul E!" chants which really takes me by surprise. Had he been in WCW by this point? I guess so. IIRC this should be post Dangerous Alliance. Paul E grabs the mic and heads into the ring and is joined by all of Hot Stuff International and Jay Sulli. Paul E explains that there's been a merger between the 2 most powerful forces in all of wrestling (Hot Stuff International and The Dangerous Alliance). So why here and not New York? Atlanta? Vegas? Cali? Dallas? Why? Because they are determined to make Tod Gordon a broke man(Bet Paul regrets saying that one). He's gonna make Tod a broke man because no one is gonna have enough guts to step up to Hot Stuff International.

Annnd we're back in the locker room. With Hunter Q Robbins again. He calls Stetson & Winters a bunch of cry babies, whining to Tod Gordon for a rematch. Robbins says that this will be their last title match. No more after this.

Tag Title Match: The Super Destroyers (C) vs. Tony Stetson & Larry Winters

The Super Destroyers get themselves all hyped up by giving each other forearm shots to the chest!...And then hugging. What's with these two monsters hugging each other? Stetson pulls out a Booker T move, the one where you twist the arm, side-step, then give them a reverse kick to the head. Other than that it's total snorefest until Robbins passes some brass knuckles to one of the SDs and they use them to pick up the win. Yawn. Let's move on.

Sal Bellomo is in the locker room and he's cutting a promo through his hair. Yes. He has all his hair pulled over and covering his face. He says that he doesn't want Sandman's belt. He wants something else from him, and he's gonna get it. Peaches?

Match: Sal Bellomo vs. (C) The Sandman

This is a title match to be clear. Sandman gets a quick roll-up on Sal, then pats his ass after Sal's quick kick-out. The weirdest thing happens. Sal takes down Sandman then hooks the leg, but the ref doesn't count because Sandman has one of his shoulders up, then we just sit there in that position for like 30 seconds. Sal gets dumped outside and he goes for a stroll, including high-fiving a kid...and he gets counted out. Sal can't believe it. That's all. That's the match.

In the locker room with Rockin' Rebel and Tigra! I'm liking this duo. Rebel says that Sandman knows he's dangerous, and says that he "went surfing on his head" two weeks ago, which gives me a good laugh. Rebel says that Sandman is jealous because Rebel got the hottest girl in ECW and Sandman didn't.

Match: Rockin' Rebel vs. Ernesto Benefica

Rebel is from the Rock & Roll Capital of the world. Cleveland? Either way, Rebel is handling Ernesto with no worries and frequent camera cuts to Tigra. This match is allll Rebel who picks up the win with a spinebuster. It seems that Rebel and Tigra beat on Ernesto some more as we head to commercial.

We're now ringside and Jay Sulli is joined by Hunter Q Robbins and Tod Gordon. Tod has a proposition for Robbins. Tod has a contract in hand which details a match for next week. Stetson & Winters are willing to put their hair on the line(NO NOT THE MULLETS) for another shot at the tag titles in a no DQ match. Robbins snatches it up and signs it in a hurry. Gordon tells Robbins that he should've read the contract first, because it includes another stipulation. During the match Robbins will be ringside, but he will be handcuffed to Tommy Cairo. Robbins is irrate and screams at Tod before he runs off.

LOCKER ROOM! LOCKER ROOM! Yep, we're back. Now with Candido and Hotbody, err, sorry, Christopher Candido and Jonathon Hotbody. Wait...this is just a damn replay of their promo from last week! Damn. ECW boomed me.

Match: Jonathon Hotbody vs. Tommy Cairo

Cairo for some reason is sporting a leather jacket with tassels all over it, a doo-rag, and some ass-less chaps. Quite the look, but he quickly strips out of it with the help of the ref. The pace in this match is must improved. Roid Belly Cairo throwing some suplexes and heel kicks, Hotbody dropping elbows from the apron. They have one hell of a time with these wobbly ropes as they attempt a superplex but basically becomes a DDT from the top-rope. Candido messes up and Cairo wins with a roll-up. Hotbody and Cairo keep brawling as we head off the air!

_______________________

Ohhhh boy. Paul E is here! Now we're cooking. I'm hoping he's on air as much as possible before we head into the Extreme era ECW is known for. We got a promo from Funk, but I still need some more from him. Funk, Gilbert, and Rebel/Tigra are the most interesting things in ECW for me right now.

[ecwredditretrospective]

ECW HARDCORE TV - April 27th, 1993 (04/27/93)

Welcome to Eastern Championship Wrestling on Sports Channel Philadelphia. Jay Sulli is very over-dressed for the occasion, with a full bow-tie and sash. Or maybe he's dressed perfectly for the occasion, because we have two titles on the line tonight! The Sandman defends his ECW Heavyweight Title against the #1 contender, Rockin' Rebel. Surfer Sandman with a speedy recovery from his brush with death last week. And we also have The Super Destroyers defending their tag belts against Larry Winters and Tony "The Hitman" Stetson.

And for the 4th week in a row Eddie Gilbert interrupts the opening intro. Getting a little tired of it to be honest. Eddie tells us that he is our guest commentator this week because he ran Terry Funk out of the town(he's not). Eddie explains that he had an I Quit match with Terry, and won. And he rolls the tape! I thought he was joking at first, but nope, I guess this match actually took place? I don't know.

Hey! We get our very first instance of a classic ECW move, where they say that the censors are not allowing them to show the rest of the tape due to it's graphic nature, but a Tod Gordon voiceover assures us that Eddie did not run Terry out of town, and we will hear from the Hardcore Legend next week.

Back from the break and we have Hunter Q. Robbins III with a mic in the locker room, with the SDs looming behind him. He once again calls Stetson and Winters Homer and Bart Simpson, and again, I'm not seeing what's so insulting about that. Robbins sweetens the pot! Robbins puts up $500 dollars of his own money on the line, if Stetson & Winters can beat the SDs and take their tag titles.

Match: The Super Destroyers (C) vs. Larry Winters & Tony Stetson

I'll be shocked if the SDs lose this one. Mullets. I'm so perplexed by mullets. How did they become a thing? Why did people think they looked good? How do you even grow one? The Super Destroyers dominate this match early, which makes me a little less confident that they'll win. As soon as Winters gets going, the SDs get DQ'd when one of the SDs interfere with Robbins' cane. There's a weird scuffle where nobody really comes out on top, but Winters and Stetson are our winners by DQ.

Match: Sal Bellomo vs. Glenn Osbourne

Hot Stuff barges in and grabs the mic. He's got a big announcement! Glenn Osbourne takes exception and starts shoving Hot Stuff. What's this? Snuka is making his way down to the ring, and he's not alone. It's "Magnificent" Muraco! He shouts a bunch of nonsense into the mic. The long and short of it is that Muraco will be joining Hot Stuff International in their quest to takeover ECW.

We're back in the same locker room that Robbins was in a few minutes ago, it's time for the debut of The Suicide Blondes! And they want to go by their proper names, Christopher Candido and Jonathon Hotbody. They're here to take on all comers!

Match: The Suicide Blondes vs. Tommy Cairo and JT Smith

Yeaaaa. I'm pumped to finally get some more of the big name ECW guys, I'm excited to see what Candido's got in store for us. Sulli points out that they're called The Suicide Blondes, but Hotbody is not blonde. Yeah, I'm confused too Jay. Action is actually pretty decent. Good tag work from both teams. Smith is a bit of a sleeper. He's a Philly boy so the crowd loves him and he's got some athleticism. The Suicide Blondes pick up the win with some heel tactics.

We're back in the locker room with Muraco and Snuka, teasing what's to come. Snuka seems to want to get over this new catchphrase. TCB, as in Taking Care of Business. Is that what you call it when you kill your girlfriend? Just wondering.

Match: Muraco & Snuka vs. The Hell Riders

It starts hot with Muraco and Snuka rushing the Riders before the bell goes. This match is a formality, we all know who's getting the win here. They dominate the whole way until they pick up the win with Muraco pressing Snuka then dropping him on HD Ryder.

And now Sulli is back in the locker room! Man, we really love this locker room tonight. Sulli warns us about the footage we're about to see, which is a replay of the whole Rebel/Sandman incident last week. They cut out right before the best part! "HE COULD BE DEAD!!" Oh well.

Match: The Sandman (C) vs. Rockin' Rebel

We join this one in progress for some reason. Peaches is in The Sandman's corner and Tigra is in Rebel's corner. Nice little added layer of drama. Tigra is um...I'd like to see more of Tigra. And she gets involved, raking at Sandman's eyes as the ref's back is turned. She's horrible at making it look real, but it is what it is. The match eventually gets tossed as Tigra jumps in to save Rebel, and prompts Peaches to jump in and attack Tigra.

Stevie's certainly no Joey Styles. As the women shove each other in the corner Stevie gives us this call: "meowwww...meowwww." Rebel takes Peaches off of Tigra then quickly bales once Sandman comes at him.

We get a a recap of the TV Title Tournament...Okay.

And then the show still isn't over. Sulli is ringside with Hunter Q. Robbins. Next week we've got a rematch for the Tag Titles and The Sandman will also defend his title, and the return of Terry Funk!

___________________

That's the show. Two Title matches, two fuck finishes. Pretty disappointing to be honest. I'm still interested in Rebel vs. Sandman so it's not the worst thing ever that this feud will continue. And I wanna keep an eye on Tigra. Seems like they want to transition her to a full-on valet. She got very involved in the match and would stare down the camera and give her little tiger claw pose every chance she got. She's clearly got some ambition, but I've never heard of her so obviously she doesn't go very far, so I'm interested in seeing what happens with her.

The show was really missing the energy of Terry Funk, so I'm looking forward to his return next week.

[ecwredditretrospective]

ECW HARDCORE TV E03 - April 20th, 1993 (04/20/93)

Of course ECW has an episode on 4/20.

Okay. It's time to address this. Is it Jay Sulli or Jay Sully? Because it seems like ECW can't make up their mind. I'll check later when we get there, but I'm pretty sure Jay shows up in the post-show credit roll as Jay Sully. Maybe Jay Sulli is his kayfabe name? And for the 3rd straight week Wonderful set-up the intro for Terry Funk to join them, but instead it's Hot Stuff Eddie Gilbert who comes out.

Funk follows him out shortly, but we've got a change of pace! Gilbert is humbled and apologizes to Terry, who accepts it but is still gonna keep an eye on him.

Match: The Super Destroyers vs. Super Ninja & The Wolfman

Destroyers get off to a hot start jumping their opponents before the bell rings. We've seen everyone in this match except for The Wolfman, who is not impressive in the slightest, and pretty hairless for a supposed Wolfman. This match is allll Super Destroyers who pick up the win with a simple senton.

Funk interview the manager of the Super Destroyers - Hunter Q. Robbins III - The interview only lasts a few seconds before Eddie Gilbert runs in and blasts Funk with a chair. Hot Stuff continues to beat him down as we head to commercial.

Semi-Final Match: Tommy Cairo vs. Jimmy Snuka

Gilbert is back ringside with Snuka right after his attack on Terry Funk, who is absent from the commentary team. Remember, Cairo is still un-beaten in ECW but he's got a tough one here against Snuka. Gilbert grabs a mic from commentary and does a Funk impression, proclaiming Eddie Gilbert to be the best at everything. And thank God Sulli pointed out that it was Gilbert on the mic and not Terry, otherwise I would have NEVER figured that one out.  

Stevie: Let me ask you something Sulli, why is it called a squared circle?

Sulli: I don't know.

Snuka is clearly past his prime here, but he's still clearly head and shoulders above everyone else in this company. Mostly when it comes to portraying his character, mannerisms, and facial reactions. RUN-IN! It's Johnny Hotbody, he's not able to do much other than knock-down the ref and cause a distraction, letting Snuka take advantage as he pulls out some brass knucks and pops Cairo with them. The crowd get to their feet as Snuka lands the Superfly Splash and gets the 1-2-3.

Sulli conducts the post-match interview and he is not having it! He gets in Gilbert's face, calling him a despicable person. Gilbert continues impersonating Funk but quickly switches it up to putting over our future ECW TV Champion Jimmy Snuka.

Semi-Final Match: "Hot Stuff" Eddie Gilbert vs. Glenn Osbourne

So, Gilbert realizes that if he wins he's facing Snuka for the Title, right? Does he plan to lay down for Snuka? We'll see I guess. Gilbert grabs the mic and gives Osbourne the chance to walk out now, and of course he doesn't take it. Match is off to a slow start but picks up when things head to the outside. Sulli is disgusted by Eddie's tactics of using tables and chairs, refusing to call it wrestling. Just wait a few years, Sulli. Just you wait. Longggg rest hold where the most interesting action is my fight against falling asleep. But God bless Stevie, calling out Osbourne for some...ILLEGAL TACTICS! Gilbert one-ups those illegal tactics with a shot to the face with everyone's weapon of choice - brass knucks. 1-2-3, Gilbert is our winner...OR NOT! Sulli won't stand for it and informs the ref of Gilbert's cheating. Ref reverses the decision, now Osbourne is our winner!

Gilbert confronts Sulli post-match but almost instantly he gets PEARL HARBOUR'D by Terry Funk! Funk's swinging a chair at him wildly, missing more than he hits. Funk beats on him until Hot Stuff runs away and the crowd is loving it, chanting Terry's name.

Funk is on fire and now he's in Stevie's face, calling him out and then calling out Gilbert. Funk cuts one hell of a promo here, putting himself over as a certified badass. "I am Terry Funk and I am the meanest fucker in the town!" Funk barrels towards the camera as he throws chairs off to the side, challenging Eddie, just name the time and place.

We're back from break with the #1 contender to the ECW Title, Rockin' Rebel. Rebel is on the mic and calls over Ring Girl Peaches, who if you don't remember, planted a kiss on The Sandman last week. Rebel can't understand what she seems in The Sandman and he wants a kiss of his own, but instead Peaches slaps the taste out of his mouth.

Rebel runs into the ring and takes care of his opponent in a matter of seconds, he then chases down Peaches and drags her back to the ring by her hair. Surfer Sandman is here for the save! Surfboard and all! He pounces on Rebel, but wait! Tigra(another ring girl) jumps onto Sandman and starts gouging his eyes! What the hell?!

And if you thought that was bad, Rebel grabs Sandman's surfboard and cracks him in the head with it, breaking it into two!

Stevie: The Sandman is hurt.

Sulli: HURT?! HE COULD BE DEAD!!!

Holy shit I'm dying laughing. Calm down Sulli. Locker room clears to break up the action and scare off Rockin Rebel. Peaches rushes to Sandman's side and does what I'm sure all medical professionals advise you to do with a head trauma victim - rock their head and neck back and forth as you pretend to be distraught.

ECW TV TITLE TOURNAMENT FINALS: Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka vs. Glenn Osbourne

Stevie Wonderful is in the back checking on the status of The Sandman, so ECW owner Tod Gordon is here to fill in. Gordon puts over the show and refers to ECW as "out of control hardcore haven". Foreshadowing what's to come for the future of ECW?  

Match kicks off with some arm drags! We love our arm drags in the early 90's. Pretty standard match until it's time for a ref bump and some more cheating from Hot Stuff International. Doesn't take long for Snuka to hit the Superfly Splash. And our inaugural ECW TV Champion is Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka. Not much fanfare and we quickly move on.

We're backstage with Stevie now who's trying to get a word with The Sandman. Peaches answers the door in tears, explaining that Sandman probably has a slight concussion but they're waiting to get him to the hospital.

_________________________________________

And that's the show! That was actually a lot of fun! A lot of shit went down and I'm excited to see where we go from here, especially with Funk/Gilbert and now Sandman/Rebel. I mean, Sandman could be dead!!! Gotta tune in next time to find out.

[ecwredditretrospective]

I will watch, recap, and review every episode of ECW | ECW Reddit Retrospective | Post #2 | E02

ECW Hardcore TV E02 - April 13th, 1993(04/13/93)

We are greeted by Jay Sulli and Stevie Wonderful. Wonderful is going to bring in our guest commentator, "The King of the Texas Death match!"...Hot Stuff Eddie Gilbert. Ah, classic switcheroo from that jokester Stevie. Gilbert is drinking a bottle of Perrier for some reason.

Sully gives us our REAL guest commentator, Terry Funk. Gilbert and Funk get into it, until Funk grabs Gilbert's Perrier water and dumps it down his shirt and tosses it in his face, which makes a squealing Eddie Gilbert run away. Seems like we've got a feud on our hands, wonder if this will lead to an in-ring feud between Funk and Gilbert. Only time will tell!

Match:  #5 Johnny Hotbody vs. #3 Glen Osbourne

The TV Title tournament continues right here on the famed Sports Channel Philadelphia. There is a fantastic line as Hotbody is announced. "He weighs 300 pounds counting his ego, Johnny Hotbody!" and then Osbourne is announced as "The Madman from the Badlands". God bless these guys, just doing everything they can to get over.

"Hotbody knows what he's doing in this ring, and I think Osbourne does too." Great insight from Terry Funk.

And Wow. As someone who's watching wrestling in 2018, it is tough to watch this wrestling. The most exciting move you see is a vertical suplex. Whoa! I take that back, there's a german suplex from Hotbody! Hotbody has Osbourne in a sleeper hold down on the mat, so Osbourne starts slapping the mat, rallying the crowd behind him! Well, he got about 4 fans to clap along with him.

REF BUMP! REF BUMP! And Hotbody goes downstairs with the Nakamura Special, then following it up with a piledriver. Hotbody's got this in the bag...until Tommy Cairo interferes, leading to Osbourne getting the W, and Osbourne moves on, in the TV Title Tournament.

Match: Tony Stetson & Larry Winters vs. Chris Michaels and The Samoan Warrior

It's my boy! The most average there is, the most average there was, the most average there ever will be, Tony "The Hitman" Stetson! He's back in action with his tag partner Larry Winters. Early on in this match all 3 commentators go off on a tangent about the hot ring girls, so that was a thing.

I just wanna see this Samoan dude, and find out how he's related to the Anoi'i Family. And of course, we get the classic "Samoans have hard head" gimmick. I both love it and hate it at the same time. Winters and Stetson pick up the win with a...cradled leg drop? Winters holds Michaels, with Michaels legs around his waist, then Stetson drops the leg from the top.

Funk's got a post-match interview with the winning team, which gets interrupted by the Manager of our Tag Champs, The Super Destroyers. Honestly, I forget his name, and Funk doesn't seem to want to hear from him because he never sticks the mic in his face, so the only part of the promo I caught was when he called Stetson & Winters Homer and Bart Simpson, which for some reason was insulting enough to provoke an attack from the tag team.

BUT THE SUPER DESTROYERS ARE HERE! Mayhem between the two teams! Which means it's perfect time for a commercial break.

"One of the great athletes in the world today." Well, that's certainly one way to describe The Sandman, Terry. So...Either I'm very confused, or Terry Funk is very confused, and I'm willing to bet that 1993 Terry Funk has a lot more concussion than 2018 Me does.

Terry says that the winner of the tournament still has to beat Sandman in order to win the title. So, either the winner of the tournament gets the TV Title and a shot at the ECW Title, or Funk has had one too many concussions.

Ahhhhh yeahhhh! Here he is! Surfer Sandman makes his way down and it's time to get interviewed by The Funker! Sandman cuts a super whitemeat babyface promo, thanking Terry for all that he's done, and thanking the fans because he wouldn't be Champ without them. This is so weird. Surfer Sandman is blowing my mind. I can't wait to watch his transformation.

Match: The Sandman vs. The Kodiak Bear

The Kodiak Bear looks like bingo hall Luke Harper. Before the bell rings, our 3 lovely commentators go off on another tangent about the Ring Ladies, Funk willing to give the earlier one - Tigra - to Stevie if he can have the new one - Peaches. Things That Wouldn't Fly Today for $400, Alex.

And a moment later, Funk is betrayed by his beloved Peaches as she grabs ahold of Sandman and lays one on him, then eye-fucks the camera.

"Take a look at the Champion. The tan, the charisma, the looks, the moves, he's got it all!" Sully might be crushing on our ECW Champion, Surfer Sandman.

Surfer Sandman has got to have some of the worst ring gear ever. A multi-coloured wetsuit that appears to be VERY tight. No wonder he wrestled the rest of his career in track pants and a t-shirt.

I'm no submission savant, but the move Sandman wins the match with appears to be very similar to the Tazmission. Either way, there it is, The Sandman picks up the win with very little trouble.

Match: #2 Hot Stuff Eddie Gilbert vs. #7 J.T. Smith

Commentary team breaks down when Stevie tells Funk to shut up, which he takes VERY personally and makes Stevie take it back, making him drop a few yes sirs and no sirs along the way.

Back to the match! Things go to the outside very quickly, Hot Stuff is all over Smith, including whacking him in the head with the ring bell which is not a DQ somehow. Stevie later accuses J.T. Smith of using some...ILLEGAL TACTICS. Booker would be proud.

Smith goes for an ugly moonsault and gets nothing but mat. Hot Stuff pulls out some brass knucks to take the win and Funk takes exception to that. At this point I'll be shocked if we don't get a Gilbert vs. Funk match some time soon.

Match: "Ironman" Tommy Cairo vs. Super Ninja

We join this one in progress! Why is there another match? No idea. Why are we joining it in progress when this is clearly a taped show? No idea. And yes, of course Super Ninja is a white dude in a ninja costume.

Every punch and kick from Super Ninja is either a "martial arts punch" or a "martial arts kick". You know, now that I think about it, he IS wearing a black belt, so he must be a master of the martial arts. Who am I to doubt Super Ninja?

Match gets thrown out when Hotbody runs in and attacks Cairo. They then brawl to the back to close the show.

Terry Funk is joined once again by owner Tod Gordon to say farewell and preview next week, and again Terry says that the winner of the tournament will face the Champion, so I have no idea what's going on here. So next week we'll have our semi-finals and the finals! And we'll find out what the hell the winner gets. The ECW TV Title? A Title match against The Sandman? Both? I DON'T KNOW!

__________________

Overall I'd say it's a decent show. We've got a few feuds brewing with Funk vs. Gilbert and Hotbody vs. Cairo. I'm actually interesting in seeing who's gonna win the tournament.

Again, I won't have a fixed schedule for these posts, just trying to do them as often as I can. So until next time, adios partners!

[ecwredditretrospective]

Starting today I will watch, recap, and review every episode of ECW | ECW Reddit Retrospective | Post #1 | E01

A little background on me to get us started. I'm a 24 YO Canadian and have been a wrestling fan for as long as I can remember. But what I can't remember is much of anything that took place during the 90's, which includes our beloved ECW.

So for some reason I've decided to watch every (available) episode of ECW, including PPVs. We'll be picking up at the first episode that aired on April 6th, 1993. At this time Paul Heyman is not involved, Tod Gordon is the owner, Eddie Gilbert is the booker, and ECW stands for Eastern Championship Wreslting and is part of the National Wrestling Alliance.

Depending on how things go, I may try to breeze through the Eastern Championship Wrestling era of ECW, as I sense it might be a bit of a slog.

ECW Hardcore TV E01 - April 6th, 1993(04/06/93)

EASTERN CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING!

We kick off with a title card that showcases some of the big names that have stepped foot in the ECW ring: Jimmy Snuka, British Bulldog, Jim Neidhart, Don Muraco, Nikolai Volkov, Nikita Koloff.

Our hosts for the inaugural episode of Eastern Championship Wrestling on Sports Channel(Philly) are Jay Sully and Stevie Wonderful. Yes, Sports Channel, very creative naming.

Todd Gordon joins them with the  newly minted ECW TV Title and the show looks to be taking place in the gymnasium of a local high school.

Gordon teases that there will be a 3rd member of the commentary team, saying that he's a "Living Legend". Gotta be Larry Zbyszko, right? Nope. And it's not the Gilbert guy that's barging in right now either...it's THE FUNKER! Terry Funk is the 3rd man. He looks young! Gilbert runs him down, but Funk scares him off, preventing further embarrassment lest the Funker kicks his ass. Funk thanks the "hardcore" fans, because they've made ECW viable. Funk pushes the TV Title tournament.

Was Terry looking to make a move out of wrestling and into commentary at this time?

Match: The Super Destroyers vs. The Hell Riders

We come back from the break and are introduced to our ECW Tag Team Champions, The Super Destroyers! Which are two hulking white dudes in what look like gimp masks. They're here to take on The Hell Riders! HD Ryder & EZ Ryder. The one dude(HD) looks a lot like Mick Foley.

Good line from Stevie Wonderful. "Yeah they're(SD's) getting tested, but they wrote all the answers!"

"Terry can you tell which Super Destroyer this one is?" "I know for sure it's either 1 or 2."

This match includes exhilarating action such as a BACK RAKE!

Fuck is actually decent on commentary. Pretty smooth. Quick thinker.

SDs win with a running senton. Quick, and very bad match. Not sure the other Ryder even got in the ring. The BIG. HUGE. INTIMIDATING. SUPER DESTROYERS...share a hug before their manager comes back into the ring and gives them their Tag Titles.

Funk interviews the Manager post match. He's very shouty, his voice cracking everywhere. Mr. Hunter Q. Robbins III.

SANDMAN Vignette!

IT'S SURFER SANDMAN! He wrestles in a wetsuit and has those weird glasses. Surf's Up. Hang Ten. Surf Board. Is he a heel? Because he does some heel moves in the video package. Holy shit Surfer Sandman is the ECW Champion. Did not see that one coming.

We come back with two wrestlers in the ring. It's time for the first match in the ECW TV Title Tournament. Tommy Cairo is given some promo time from Funk. Hits us with the great line, "The Ironman is here, when he comes to town, sooner or later baby, everbody else goes down!" Yep, can't see why I've never heard of this guy before.

Match: Tommy Cairo vs. Wildman Salvatore Bellomo w The Cosmic Commander

Early on it seems like Cairo could be a big deal here. "Ironman." Undefeated. From Jersey. He's in good shape, not a horrible looking dude. \#4 seed! This is a seeded tourney I guess? Sal is the #6 seed.

Sal is dressed like a cross between a roman soldier and a little school girl. Funk doesn't understand what undefeated means. Says his Mother has never wrestled in ECW so I guess she's undefeated too.

Exciting moves such as an arm drag! And an arm drag! And another arm drag! Cairo's got a good case of roid belly. The Cosmic Commander is wearing a snazzy red coat with a white turbin, and smoaking a cigar. Think he's got several gimmicks mixed up with each other. Cairo was on the ropes, punching down onto Bellomo! Blatant disregard for the rules! WE'VE GOT A RUN IN. JOHNNY HOTBODY! Hotbody tries to attack Cairo, but he ducks and Hotbody hits Bellomo! Cairo wins by count out, as Bellomo bales after this interference. Hotbody tries to attack Cairo post-match, but to no avail! Cairo clears the ring.

We get a glimpse of the bracket!

#1 Snuka vs. #8 Larry Winters. #4 Tommy Cairo vs. #5 Sam Bellomo. #2 Eddie Gilbert vs. #7 JT Smith. #3 Glen Osbourne vs #5 Johnny Hotbody.

Match: Tony "The Hitman" Stetson vs. Rockin Rebel

Something tells me Tony Stetson won't be known as The Hitman for much longer. Rockin' Rebel is the #1 contender to The Sandman's ECW Championship. And I can see why, with a flowing mullet like that. Another sweet arm drag from Stetson! And another 2 arm drags! Stetson uses finger guns, and now I can see why he never got over. Match is better than what we've seen so far. A few more moves and some physcology, with Stetson working the arm a bit. Rebel looks like Thomas Hayden Church...With a longgg mullet. Top rope leg drop from Stetson! Stetson, also rocking a mullet. Rebel wins with a leveraged pin, putting his feet on the ropes.

Rebel cuts a post-match promo, calling out Sandman. Very basic content, but decent delivery. And finishes it off with a Woo!

It's time for the Superfly! He introduces his new manager, Hot Stuff Eddie Gilbert! Gilbert cuts a hyped promo, telling us that Hot Stuff International is gonna take off.

Match: Jimmy Snuka vs. Larry Winters

Funk rambles on about his dislike for Gilbert. Snuka is surprisingly a heel. Figured on name recognition alone he'd be their star babyface. Snuka definitely stands out in this scene. Big broad shoulders, nice gear. Gilbert is getting involved in the match very often, which makes Funk irate. Fans get excited for the first time in this show when Snuka climbs the top rope as we all know what's coming next. He hits the Splash, and it looks great, and he gets the win.

We're back from break with some scrawny dude with a cape on standing in the ring, and Funk is on the mic telling us that we have some room for improvement for this show, including the crowd. Sal Bellomo interrupts! He wants back in!

Sal comes in and squashes the scrawny dude with a cape. Okay. That was a thing. Funk is excited for next week's show! We've got the semi-finals and the finals, don't we Todd Gordon! Uh, nope Terry, we've got the quarter-finals next week, THEN the semis and finals the week after that, Gordon corrects him. But what we do have next week is our ECW Heavyweight Champion The Sandman making his debut!

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Well that's a wrap! Overall, not a good show in the slightest. Lol. Seems like we're gonna have to wade through a sea of boring before we get to the good 'ol EC-DUB we all know and love.

I won't have a fixed schedule for these posts, I'm gonna try to do them as often as I can, otherwise this series is gonna take a long ass time. Saying that, I hope people read and enjoy this, or at least read it and give me some constructive criticism.

So as the great Terry Funk says to close out the first episode of Eastern Championship Wrestling on Sports Channel, adios partners!