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It's so fucking funny how many people who owned Furbies as children ended up being traumatized by them in some way

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lol

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The Heir from Tunic

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Things about boobs that everyone should know

Because I just keep finding out people don't know these things!

Most boobs "sag."

Actually, on that note: very very few people have the stereotypically perfect breasts that are round and perky and don't touch your ribcage/belly. Here is an entire gallery of non-sexualized, perfectly normal breasts. Here is another one, but in one image. There's an incredible range of size and shape!

Also related: very few people fit those molded foam-cup bras. Because very few people have a boob that shape. "Then why are those kinds of bras everywhere??" Because they're cheap to make and they hide your nipples.

Your "armpit fat" is probably not armpit fat. It is probably your tail of spence, and you have lymph nodes there. Some people have a bigger or smaller tail of spence, and it has very little to do with how fat you are or how big your boobs are. (Some bras can press on it or pinch it uncomfortably, like balconettes.)

When you lie on your back, your boobs will go into your armpits. That is true of EVERYONE WITH BOOBS, with the exception of some implants. Boobs are squishy! This also means that like, lying on your side will cause them to flop over. If that's uncomfortable when you're trying to sleep, there is such a thing as "sleep bras."

Lots of people's boobs get bigger and/or painful before their period starts. Some people gain an entire cup size every month.

Whether or not you wear bras has no effect on "sagging." The one "study" on this that was written about everywhere extremely badly done. The one exception: If you do the kind of exercise that has you jumping around/jogging a lot, and you don't wear a supportive-enough bra, it's possible you can injure the cooper's ligaments. But also: that would hurt, a lot.

Bras also have no effect on whether you get breast cancer.

Everyone has one boob that's bigger than the other. It's just a matter of degree.

The size of your boobs has nothing to do with whether or not you've had sex???? I'm stunned that there are people that believe this, but I've heard multiple people say they had relatives who absolutely believed this--refused to buy teenagers the correct size bra because "only sluts wear D-cups," or insisted a thirteen-year-old was "fast" because of breast growth during puberty...good lord.

It's possible for AMAB people to breast-feed--they have the same mammary glands AFAB people do! Some hormonal issues can cause people (both AFAB and AMAB) who haven't given birth to lactate, but also there's a few cases where transgender women have been given the same hormones that AFAB people's bodies make during pregnancy/lactation, and voila! Breast milk!

(I very intentionally didn't go into bra sizing with this post, but yes, if you hate your bras, you are probably wearing the wrong size and/or style for you. That's a much more finicky topic though, so I'm just going to point out that the letter doesn't mean anything about boob size by itself, D isn't big, and Victoria's Secret's "fittings" are garbage. For more info, go to the subreddit for r/abrathatfits, or try their size calculator.)

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👻 corpsecourse-of-course Follow

Have you ever seen a more obvious mortal pretending to be undead? “everyvone” Okay, just say you don’t understand how harmful the “all vampires have a Transylvanian accent” stereotype truly is. @_bitty-bat get your living shitting ass off of tomblr. fakefanger.

☠️ ghosted-ghouls Follow

and the way he censored “chr*st” in christmas… a real vamp would know that the word only works on its own

as if the name christie could harm us lmao

🧛🏻‍♀️ oldvampyaoi Follow

ehh i dunno, there’s kinda a difference between “christie” and “chr*stmas”

☠️ ghosted-ghouls Follow

doesnt the name christie come from christ too?

🧛🏻‍♀️ oldvampyaoi Follow

HHHHSSSSSSSSSSKKKCKKCKKKKSHSHHKK

🦴 boner-i-hardly-knower Follow

hey wait wouldn’t the X in xmas burn vampires and unholy spirits too cuz it’s a cross?

🧛🏻‍♀️ oldvampyaoi Follow

HHHHHHSHHSHSHSHSSAKKAKAKAKKAKAKAHAHAHAHAHSHSHSHSHSHSHSSHSJSKJDJSKFKDKDJDJD

🫁 body-parts-human-hearts Follow

i know the op of the screamshot, it’s a vampire i’ve seen its fangs before

🧛🏻‍♂️ nosey-furatu Follow

what were you doing looking at its fangs hmm 🤨

🫁 body-parts-human-hearts Follow

fucking it?? obviously????

🧛🏻 bitty-bat Follow

ve have stereotypical transylvania vampire sex ah ah ah

🦇 unsound-familiar Follow

are we just supposed to ignore @_oldvampyaoi typing out burning sounds

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THE SNOOPY SHOW • 2.13

Happiness is the Gift of Giving

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I Want a Dog for Christmas, Charlie Brown (2003)

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i just read someone on twitter saying that sevika met silco because she thought he was a lesbian and tried to flirt with him at the last drop years ago i think im gonna piss myself

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don't be sad, you have good boobs

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Perfectly timed wedding photo

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On this blog we are either:

Romantic, horny, or depressed. Hope this helps.

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rating different responses to telling someone i’m polyamorous / dating multiple people

“oh… but how does that work?” a little annoying but usually comes from a place of genuine confusion or curiosity. 6/10

“but isnt that cheating?” no. 2/10

“so who’s your favourite partner?” believe it or not i dont have one, and even if i did have a fave it’d be shitty to say it out loud. 3/10

“oh sweet me too” FUCK YEAH 10/10

“can i join” well i barely know you so no. ranges from 2/10 to 4/10 depending on who’s asking

“woah so you’re like, an ot3 in real life” fuck your fandom shit. touch grass. 1/10

“i could never do polyamory” you’d think this is a perfectly fine thing to hear until you get it from EVERY FUCKING PERSON. 3/10

“thats cool” hell yeah it is. 9/10

“you'll get married and find the one eventually” fuck you ive already found the several and amatonormativity can go give birth to a cactus out of its asshole. 0/10

“so how do you guys break up” and we’re back with another well meaning question. if you are familiar with among us then that’s your answer. 5/10

“like sister wives” absolutely not. wildly different. 1/10

“rent must be way easier” monogamy? in this economy? yeah you have a point. 7/10

“huh i never thought of that, maybe i should become poly/open up my relationship” go nuts!! but be cautious as it could fuck up any present monogamous relationship you have, make sure to communicate clearly & respect boundaries. 6/10

“damn you must have so many threesomes/orgies” i mean yeah but also thats not how you start a conversation. 3/10

“oh that must be nice, having so many people who love you and you care about” awww thank you. it really, really is. 10/10

“like mormons” die. -10000/10

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my cat Meatball’s hanukkah sweater started kinda coming off, so my girlfriend went to fix it, and as she did so she said to him, in her most tender and maternal voice, “aww, is your shirt coming off? whore”

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#Merry crisis

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my only advice is to BE CAREFUL posting about holiday traditions around europeans. you'll post something casual like "anyone else watch the old Grinch movie every year? what a classic" and a european will appear as if summoned and say some shit like "funny how USAmericans always CONVENIENTLY forget that Not Everyone On Earth is from The USA…….. no of COURSE we dont watch 'the grunch' or whatever the fuck that is…. our tradition is to attend a community showing of Glummdorf the Racial Stereotype"