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i’m so late wow please ! forgive me ! i’ve been w the kids i nanny for the past 15 hours why @god ... BUT anyway i’m sus, i’m 18, nd in the est and below is a bit about scott who could have gone pro if it weren’t for his trick knee !!!

so !! scottie grew up in boston ( does a boston accent still slip thru occasionally ? you decide !! but the answer is yes ) w his parents and brother. they sometimes struggled to make ends meet but ?? just ur average family for the most part you kno

he took to ice hockey when he was young and hnestly grew up to be a hockey ~legend~ within their little area, ended up getting a good ass sport scholarship to boston college, literally coasted through on his rep for hockey and never studied, and eventually got scouted by the ny rangers !!! nice ! except i never let my muses be happy for this long so :)

( was not even joking about ^^^^ his^ trick knee. lmao ) after he had been on the team for just under two years, Heavily Fucking w the lifestyle he was leadin due to his career, he got a terrible injury during a game and could never play pro again ! watch as everything he worked for, everything he cares about, gets shattered along w his kneecap !

as you can imagine he’s Bitter. so bitter. before the injury he was a total frat boy ;; always cracking jokes and flirting w people and partying, but nonetheless a good guy™, but now he’s a lot more closed off and isolates himself more often than not . he’s pretty crestfallen but his sadness usually just comes off as broodiness

still can be pretty funny but his humor is way more facetious and sarcastic now /: yike. still into meaningless flings bc he likes to keep emotions out of thing cus look where that got him w hockey SO he doesn’t even bother flirting half the time lmao just waits for people to come to him or has fwb around the city to go to

speaking of people coming to him ,, if he ever seems Extra pissy it was probably because someone recognized him on the street and brought up his old career which just. makes him smad

redeeming traits ?? lemme look brb. even tho scott tries to keep things at an arm’s distance and isn’t good at showing it he still cares deeply about certain people and things and can get super passionate about ‘em. feels things deeply and is in tune w his and other ppl’s emotions even if he hates it most of the time now. u m. i don’t even kno what else. good at making light of serious situations even if it just seems like it’s him being shitty and insensitive. yea !

oh alcohol n drug abuse tw! scottie has kind of turned to alc and drugs ( mainly weed but is definitely not opposed 2 getting into stronger stuff ,, and if he keeps going the way he’s going then that’ll happen sooner rather than later ) to deal w everything and the way he feels

hm a good thing about his injury tho is that he cares a lot less what other people think now like. not concerned w his image and how people perceive him. i.e. he’s bi as Hell and would’ve carried that with him to his grave before but now ? if someone sees a dude leave his apartment in the morning ? he’s mostly just like who the fuck even cares honesltly

this is .... a little long i’m sorry and i need to SLEEP because i’m a BABY and i’m EXHAUSTED. but pls message me to plot if ur interested !!!! or like this and i’ll come to you !! but that’ll prob happen tomorrow ( evening-ish i bet because guess who has to go to class AND nanny for those kids again ) along w me actually bein’ on the dash i’m so rry !! 

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igby goes down (2002)

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‘Isn’t it exhausting?’ ‘What?’ ‘Keeping people out.’

K.A. Tucker, Ten Tiny Breaths (via wordsnquotes)

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When you live in the dark for so long, you begin to love it. And it loves you back, and isn’t that the point? You think, the face turns to the shadows, and just as well. It accepts, it heals, it allows. But it also devours.

Raymond Carver,  Late Fragment (via danselions)

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It is a fire that consumes me, but I am the fire.

Jorge Luis Borges, “A New Refutation of Time” (via fleurdelecours)