dumbesttoy

[dumbesttoy]

[dumbesttoy]

OHHHH okay sorry for crying and struggling and biting and trying to to push you off of me and asking why you were doing this over and over and staring right through you with empty eyes i didn't realize it was for my own good lol

[dumbesttoy]

this is where i'm free to be sick and get off to everything that's twisted or wrong about me

[dumbesttoy]

Forced kissing is so hot, let me tie your arms behind your back and grab you by the chin to force you to make out with me. Let me lick the tears from your cheek and hold them on my tongue so you can taste them as I stick my tongue in your mouth

[dumbesttoy]

wish i had someone sitting next to me on the couch, up close while there are others around. they'd brush their fingers across my clothed thigh, because they know just how tender my thighs are at that particular moment. they know how extremely sensitive i am right there, because what they are caressing through the fabric are the many hidden cuts they made on my flesh only a couple nights ago. they know that the lightest touch to them when they've barely started healing will make me flinch and squirm, while nobody else around us has any clue about any of this.

[dumbesttoy]

last time i hurt myself i really wouldn't want to stop i just kept going and going. counted nearly 70 new marks.

[dumbesttoy]

I don’t want casual I want you to eat me alive

[dumbesttoy]

they need to make plushes who cum

[dumbesttoy]

[dumbesttoy]

Kidnap me so I don't have to suffer anymore. I'll even go on my knees and beg, I hate this life. Take me away even if you isolate me. Suffocate me with your dearest love while you're at it.

[dumbesttoy]

Sorry for becoming violently obsessive after you showed interest, it will never stop.

[dumbesttoy]

one thing about kink is that its play pretend for freaks and i think thats beautiful

[dumbesttoy]

[dumbesttoy]

[dumbesttoy]

i love the freeze response i love how prey animals just freeze up when scared. Completely still, you wouldn't even know anything was wrong except for the rapid heartbeat that shakes their entire body. Eyes wide and dark looking up at you, staring at nothing. picture me at the floor by your feet

[dumbesttoy]

my growing desire to be collared and owned in every sense is starting to make me stupid

i genuinely feel like i was made to live a whole different type of life and it keeps wearing me down by the year

and it's not even just some sex thing

ever since i was very little and got held down, got forced to stay still while strange adults did things to me i didn't understand, i've wanted it again

i've wanted to feel it again, to feel overpowered and helpless until i break, to then get comforted like the most precious treasured thing right after, to get called good and praised when i've just been reminded i have no autonomy

ever since i can remember, i've always given too much of myself to everyone, to the point of people leaving me for that very reason, because it's always been in my nature to become codependent

it's because all i want is for someone to have all of me, to really own me

i want to be codependent

i want to be owned

[dumbesttoy]

dreamt someone raped me

got away once or twice until i couldn't anymore