drshadowwuf

[drshadowwuf]

they've never had sex

[drshadowwuf]

so. tara was supposed to be at camp at one point and have idle banter with gale:

[drshadowwuf]

just musing about gale and his parents:

we only have a handful of conversations where he mentions his parents and when he does, it's usually only his mother, morena dekarios.

his mother is mentioned at several points in the game. during a custom protag playthrough, he mentions her in a datamined conversation that appears to be bugged/broken:

and he mentions her at the end of the game as well when he proposes to the player:

i was also able to find another mention in a banter with karlach that usually happens for me shortly after recruiting her:

from gale's origin, this aspect is explored even more deeply:

there's more, of course, and it very clearly shows that the bond he shares with his mother is a deep and loving one from both sides. it's also very interesting that he is called dekarios after his mother and not--even though naming conventions could certainly vary even in waterdeep--after his father.

who he doesn't mention at all.

the only time we do get a vague mention is during a conversation with the protag after saving mirkon from the harpies:

after that, i haven't been able to find any reference, indirect or direct, to gale's father in the game.

so, here we enter theory territory:

i feel that, from a narrative point of view, in keeping with what i think gale's themes are, gale's father may have abandoned gale and his mother when gale was still young.

gale's character is rife with what might be interpreted as abandonment issue and it makes sense to me at least that those weave through his life up until the point where the protag meets him in the game.

another theme with gale is that he appears to have a lot of female figures in this life, who all had a profound impact on him, whether that impact is positive or negative: morena, tara, and yes, mystra.

it feels like to me that he had no father figure--and i use that term a bit more loosely here--until later in his life with elminster. this is already hinted at in a game with a custom protag, but all the more solidified in a gale origin playthrough:

i think without directing telling you, the game does allow you to sort of guess at that part of his background in this way, and understand why gale is as he is as a consequence. you can also understand why he acts as he does with elminster. seeking his approval. yearning for it. being extremely hurt by elminster having to see him like this when mystra sends him to gale to deliver her... instructions. this almost pointed absence of a mention of his father in all his comments (and tara's too, now that i think about it) when it comes to family is glaring to me.

being left, being abandoned, makes it much more understandable to me why he doesn't speak of him at all: if gale's father had died, it would make more sense to me that he would remark on it or share it in some way or another. it might have come up in a banter with wyll, perhaps, who is struggling with the expectations his own father had placed on him.

"he died when i was still very young." perhaps, or something along the lines of, "i barely remember him; he died when i was only a child.", etc etc etc.

YET if gale's father indeed abandoned his mother--who he holds in such high regard, and not to mention his own hurt--i can easily see and understand why he wouldn't waste a word on him.

anyhow yes, this is long and ramble-y, and i 100% might be reading too much into what may be a simple oversight, but it was interesting to me and i still see it as tying in with the theme of abandonment, even though we don't know the reasons for it in this particular case.

was it not wishing to deal with a child with magical talents he couldn't control yet? was it for another reason entirely?

[drshadowwuf]

ll Nightmare ll

I have no excuse. I just thrive on pain with a sprinkle of wholesome.

PLEASE ASK BEFORE USING!

Leave me a tip! // Commission Info // Patreon // Store // Stream

[drshadowwuf]

Speculating on Astarion and Elvish names, based on this fantastic post by @snailpaste.

So, we know a few things. We know that elves take new names when they reach (cultural) adulthood, at about a hundred years old - a name that's chosen by and representative of them, rather than the name given by their parents. Astarion died at 39, well short of that 100-year mark, and the name 'Astarion' is the one written on his grave. Presumably, this means it was his given/child name, and he's never changed it.

The post linked above goes into a bunch of different components (in Quenya, granted, although we don't have a full D&D Elvish lexicon so Quenya is probably one of the closest options we have), and possible combinations and meanings. One fairly 'standard' meaning for Astarion is 'loyal/faithful son', from 'astar' meaning 'loyalty/faith' and '-ion' being a suffix meaning 'son of'. Let's go with 'loyal/faithful son' as his initial name, given to him by his parents.

Switching tracks somewhat - there's an early-2000s anime series called Haibane Renmei, which does some very interesting things with names. The characters wake up from cocoons with no memories save for a dream, and are named from the content of this dream; the protagonist is named 'Rakka' after her dream of falling. Later on, characters may get the opportunity to earn their true name, which is spoken the same but has different kanji; Rakka's true name means 'connected nut', a nut that has a fused shell, to show the bonds she's made with others.

There's also a darker side. The deuteragonist, Reki, is named 'pebble' after her dream of walking down a pebbled path; she later interprets her true name as 'run over', and almost gives in to her despair and depression. It's only later that she's given her real true name, 'stepping stone', indicating that this is just another step on her way forward, and is able to start healing.

(It's an absolutely beautiful anime, and short at only 13 episodes, but fair warning, it deals heavily with depression and suicide.)

So, how does this relate back to Astarion? Well, with all these interesting meanings, what if Elvish worked a similar way? Same sound, but different meaning, based on tiny differences of pronunciation or stress, or the way it's written in Espruar, or something like that? I can see Astarion, initially named 'loyal/faithful son', being forcefully renamed by Cazador - 'Astar + -ion' becoming 'Ast[o] + ar- + -ion', the components meaning (respectively) 'dust', a prefix for a royal title, and 'son of'. Son of the King of Dust, or 'Prince of Dust', a deliberately cruel reframing to show Astarion that for all his attempts at airs and graces, he's still just nothing. Prince of Dust. His early life is gone, he's the Loyal Son no more. He's just... dust. As he forgets his early, mortal life, the name Cazador has given him defines his entire existence.

More hopefully, however, this could change again, post-Cazador. He's free now. It's a rebirth, as much as becoming an adult in elven culture is; it's a good opportunity to take an adult name. Astarion has used his name for over two hundred years, far longer than elves normally would keep their child name for, and I can see him wanting to keep something of his past while also moving on; he could reframe the name again, and find a new aspiration in it as well.

'Astar + -ion' -> 'Ast[o] + ar- + -ion' -> 'Ast(ar) + -ion'; he returns to the Loyal/Faithful Son, but this time adds in 'ar' as a noun, overlapping the 'Astar' part. (Essentially, 'Ast(ar)ion' or 'Astarion'.) Now, it can be translated as 'Loyal/Faithful Son of the Sun/Day/Warmth'; it's an adult name that he's chosen, and promise to himself - that he'll find a way to walk in the sun again.

[drshadowwuf]

Blank bloodweave gifs for your imagination!! Let me know what you think they're saying here :)

[drshadowwuf]

u ever think abt how xie lian said himself that other than him few can compare to jun wu the emperor of the heavens and king of the gods in terms of fighting prowess u ever think abt how xie lian can immobilize a heavenly official w.o spiritual power using solely his physical strength u ever think abt how xie lian was the one who taught the oh so great martial god of the east tai hua how to fight and given his humble and self deprecating nature said plainly that if they were to fight to death the prince of yong an would Die for sure u ever think abt how xie lian is 5 foot 10 / 180 cm of what SURELY is pure Muscle ? anyways in conclusion: Daddy Dianxia 

[drshadowwuf]

Nezumi & Shion - NO.6 | Vanitas & Noé - The Case Study of Vanitas 

Dancing with No Music (Part 2/2) requested by solarshadow

[drshadowwuf]

I just realized that Riku's hand visibly shakes when he tenses his fingers and wrist during his idle animation.

[drshadowwuf]

[drshadowwuf]

[drshadowwuf]

Quote from James Baldwin, Giovanni's Room

[drshadowwuf]

Vanitas no Carte [Volumes 1-10], Jun Mochizuki.

[drshadowwuf]

daffodils

[drshadowwuf]

Hey everyone! This is my lovely friend Cyrus Nemati, who many of you may know as Theseus, Dionysus and Ares from the first Hades game.

He has spent the last couple years developing his very first indie game, Vampire Therapist, which plays with the many vampire character archetypes from across media.

It's been reviewing VERY well but it's not getting very many wishlists, so if you're interested in vampires, fantastic art and clever, funny, and thoughtful writing about vampire mental health, go wishlist it on Steam!

And listen, Cyrus may be too humble to leverage his colorful career as your favourite Hades hotboys, so I'm gonna do it for him 😌 GO SUPPORT FANTASTIC INDIE DEVS LIKE THIS ONE!

[drshadowwuf]

[Zosan modern life - social media AU]

IG Live gone... wrong(?)

backstory: 1. they are in their 20s something year old 2. and.. yes they dont live together yet(?) i guess? 3. sanji is a popular chef-influencer(?) on IG

[drshadowwuf]

twilight au except lance is both bella and jacob