drrobctnik

[drrobctnik]

fyi i do not “crush” i experience violent, all-consuming devotion and yearning that leaves me physically ill

[drrobctnik]

"How can you like these very toxic and horrible characters that have done despicable and unforgivable things?" oh it's quite simple actually, this is fiction and I think with my dick.

[drrobctnik]

Cathy Linh Che, from Go Forget your father//Friedrich Nietzsche// Richey Edwards// // Moss Angel, Girldirt Angelfog// Rainer Maria Rilke, Fragment of an Elegy,// Leila Miccolis, till death do us part.

[drrobctnik]

jaw threatened to flex and twist in the irritation rising from being asked. shame and pride broiled in his chest. through it all julius keeps that smile up, because that's all he's ever known. smile through the agony, the negatives - your feelings and needs and wants don't matter.

"no. everything's fine." what good would telling roman do anyway? as if roman could fix things.

@blckfckinmsk [!!]

· 𓂃 ࣪˖🔪 ˖ ࣪𓂂 . "Why punish someone without reason?"

it was a terribly naive and oddly sentimental statement. one that julius could scarcely comprehend - let alone agree with. he has to bite back the scoff that catches behind teeth. instead, julius flashes a practiced & eased smile.

"if only the world agreed with you, roro. we might be in a better off place." as it stood - being fired from his job, pending acceptance into G.U.N - julius felt a tad, bitter. maybe that was why he had brought up the topic to begin with. of course roman knew none of this: julius saw no point in sharing such developments with roman.

[drrobctnik]

👀

"no." the speed and sharpness with which julius answered that question. he didn't hesitate. an eyebrow rose in criticism, "am I supposed to? why? sentimentality? nostalgia?"

[drrobctnik]

@blckfckinmsk [!!]

· 𓂃 ࣪˖🔪 ˖ ࣪𓂂 . "Why punish someone without reason?"

it was a terribly naive and oddly sentimental statement. one that julius could scarcely comprehend - let alone agree with. he has to bite back the scoff that catches behind teeth. instead, julius flashes a practiced & eased smile.

"if only the world agreed with you, roro. we might be in a better off place." as it stood - being fired from his job, pending acceptance into G.U.N - julius felt a tad, bitter. maybe that was why he had brought up the topic to begin with. of course roman knew none of this: julius saw no point in sharing such developments with roman.

[drrobctnik]

“these characters should be mentally healthy before they get together 😌” ummm no I actually think we should smash their mental illnesses together like clumps of play-doh and see what colors it makes

[drrobctnik]

&. 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝟐 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

(  dialogue prompts taken from the silent hill 2 remake, developed by bloober team. trigger warning for dark themes. feel free to change as you seem fit. )

❛ in my restless dreams, i see that town. ❜

❛ hey, it's okay. i didn't mean to scare you. ❜

❛ i'm kind of lost. ❜

❛ i guess i don't really care if it's dangerous or not. i'm going either way. ❜

❛ what happened to this town? ❜

❛ whatever it is, it's not human. ❜

❛ i didn't do anything! he was like that when i got here. ❜

❛ you wanna come with? maybe together we can find a way out of this town. ❜

❛ sorry, but i can't leave. not yet. ❜

❛ are you afraid? ❜

❛ did you find the person that you were looking for? ❜

❛ don't worry, i'm not crazy. least, i don't think so. ❜

❛ should i go with you? this town really is dangerous. ❜

❛ what's a big dumb-dumb like you doing here anyway? ❜

❛ hey, that's not very nice. didn't your parents teach you any manners? ❜

❛ do i look like your girlfriend? ❜

❛ i can't believe it. your face, your voice... you could be— ❜

❛ i don't look like a ghost, do i? see? warm. ❜

❛ i can show you if you want. unless you have somewhere else to be? something else to do? ❜

❛ hey, easy there. i'm just messing with you. ❜

❛ you're coming with me? can't you just tell me where it is? ❜

❛ what, you were just gonna leave me here? alone? with all these monsters around? ❜

❛ is it because i remind you of... her? ❜

❛ this place we're going to, what is it, exactly? ❜

❛ you ever stay in a place like this? the walls are so thin you can hear everything. love, hate, jealousy... ❜

❛ i think you just saved my life back there. ❜

❛ hey. you think i'd look good in this one? ❜

❛ this room... there's something wrong with it. i think we should leave. ❜

❛ oh, loosen up. it sure beats running around with those monsters out there. ❜

❛ what will you tell her if... when you find her? ❜

❛ oh, c'mon. don't give me that look. i was just kidding. ❜

❛ can we stay? just for a little while? ❜

❛ this place, this whole thing, it's like a nightmare. i just wanted to get away from it, even for a second. ❜

❛ here. something to take the edge off. ❜

❛ we should probably get going. ❜

❛ we could come back later, if you want. you know, in case we need a break. ❜

❛ i wanted to ask you... what if you can't find [ name ]? what will you do? ❜

❛ thanks for checking up on me. it's very sweet of you. ❜

❛ how do you know my name? ❜

❛ i'm sorry, but i can't let you just run around this place. you might get hurt. ❜

❛ please open the door. there's something in here. ❜

❛ i was almost killed back there! i've never been so scared in my whole life! ❜

❛ all you care about is that dead wife of yours. ❜

❛ you couldn't care less about me, could you? ❜

❛ stay with me. don't leave me alone again. you're supposed to take care of me. ❜

❛ i don't know, for some reason i feel like it's up to me to protect her. ❜

❛ well, whaddaya know... a stroll in the rain. how romantic. ❜

❛ i'm trying to keep things light. just humor me, okay? ❜

❛ you think you could give me a hand? ❜

❛ you're supposed to be the big man around here. how's a little girl like me supposed to help? ❜

❛ what's wrong? i thought you wanted to get out of here. ❜

❛ this place is different from what i remember. i guess... things never really stay the same, do they? ❜

❛ you... still don't want me to go with you? if we stick together, we just might make it out of here. ❜

❛ ain't no big deal. just put the gun to their head and... pow! ❜

❛ you can't just kill someone 'cause of the way they looked at you. ❜

❛ please. i'll be good. i promise. ❜

❛ it's always the same with you. you're only after one thing. ❜

❛ i don't know who you think i am, but i don't want to hurt you. ❜

❛ i thought that thing killed you...! are you hurt? ❜

❛ but that thing... it stabbed you. there was blood everywhere. ❜

❛ stabbed me? what do you mean? ❜

❛ honey... did something happen to you? ❜

❛ are you confusing me with someone else? ❜

❛ you said you took everything. but you forgot the videotape we made. ❜

❛ it doesn't matter who i am. i'm here for you. ❜

❛ see? i'm real. ❜

❛ don't you want to touch me? ❜

❛ i'll come back, i promise. ❜

❛ how many times do i have to kill you? ❜

❛ it doesn't matter if you're smart, dumb, ugly, pretty... it's all the same once you're dead! ❜

❛ you wanna talk down to me some more? tell me to relax? ❜

❛ you know i'll find you! ❜

❛ guess i deserved it, huh? the fartface that i am. ❜

❛ you got any other things planned? i think i saw a dark room back there you could lock me up in. ❜

❛ where are you? i'm waiting for you. please, come to me. ❜

❛ i think you were right. what we're looking for... it's not here. ❜

❛ thank you for helping me earlier... but i wish you hadn't. ❜

❛ i know what you are. i know why i needed you. but it's all over now. i don't need you anymore. ❜

❛ it'd be easier if they just killed me. ❜

❛ why are you still here? i told you to go. ❜

❛ wait! please don't go. don't leave me alone. i didn't mean what i said. ❜

❛ please... tell me i'll be okay. ❜

❛ i'm here for you. so what if i'm not her? ❜

❛ i can give you what she never could. i can be better than her. ❜

❛ what else do you want me to be? ❜

❛ i won't let you do this to me. i won't let you go. ❜

❛ the truth is, i hated you. ❜

❛ i wanted my life back. ❜

❛ i tried. i really did. but... i just... can't go on without you. ❜

❛ i can't forgive myself for what i've done. ❜

❛ i want you to go on. i want you to live. for yourself and for others. ❜

❛ you made me happy. ❜

[drrobctnik]

Commission finished for my mutuals and their wonderful AU.

[drrobctnik]

[txt:] surprised to hear what?

[txt:] erm, nothing really?

[txt:] well maybe some things.

[txt:] i don't know i've never been asked that before.

[txt]: surprised to hear that. [txt]: so what else about you is old schooled too then?

[drrobctnik]

he's tugged, led really. eyes flicked down, blurred and blackened around the edges. like straws narrowed in and zoomed in on the fact that the hand was still gripped onto his jacket. oh. no one had ever done that before. why was that so...? why was julius so focused in on that? he couldn't look away from that hand on his jacket, to the point where he did bump into him when they stopped abruptly.

julius stumbled back a step, muttering a quickly, flustered and spluttered, "er, s-sorry! i didn't mean to bump into you," finally tears his eyes away in order to look at the place. his eyes widened, a sucked in stuck breath at the sight. glory that had to be the fanciest looking building he's ever seen. "whoa." decent? julius wasn't sure his wallet could afford it from just looking at the building alone.

· 𓂃 ࣪˖🔪 ˖ ࣪𓂂 . "Mhmmm," hummed back before giving Julius' jacket a tug for him to follow. "There's this place just down the block." Assured as he makes his way down pavement, still not letting go of the other's jacket as he lead to the shop. Just to abruptly stop in front of the place so that they intentionally bump into one another. "Here. It's not the best place, but it's decent." They're in the nicer part of Gotham after all, so decent is good really. He's just a bit spoiled.

[drrobctnik]

[txt:] haha er, nothing?

[txt:] i just, haven't had anyone to text before, really.

[txt:] i'm kinda old school like that??

[txt]: really? [txt]: what's wrong with you? [txt]: jk

[drrobctnik]

how to get rid of horrible and traumatic mental imagery and memories without literally turning to lethal levels of substance abuse

[drrobctnik]

@blckfckinmsk

[txt:] hey.

[txt:] sorry i don't really text very much

[txt:] lol

[drrobctnik]

you're not? that's a shame. immediately, a blush rises onto julius' expression, eyes widening a fraction in stunned surprise. o-oh. he clears his throat again as the pretty blonde stands up sharply, agreeing to the coffee. at that, julius flashes a soft, bright smile, "oh that's great. er, is there a shop nearby that you want to go to?" julius didn't quite know the area - newer to gotham - and he figured that it be better to let this guy take the reigns, lead.

· 𓂃 ࣪˖🔪 ˖ ࣪𓂂 . Head raises from magazine he was sifting through when he hears voice and eyes are quick to assess the other man in front of him. Nice face, he looks tall too. Body leans back fully in seat as he remained silent with ramblings, faint smirk on his face the entire time. "You're not? That's a shame." Said offhandedly before abruptly standing. A hand ran through hair to push a few strands out of his face. "'kay, I can go for a coffee. I wasn't waiting for anyone by the way."

[drrobctnik]

[gun shot]

[drrobctnik]

Came because my interest was piqued seeing you on my dash. Stayed because of your unique portrayal and amazing in depth characterization of the character you've brought to the table. Letting the villain be a villain. The amazing lore behind the character really has me coming back to read it over and over again. Also the mun , ive had nothing but amazing interactions with too.

thank you once again kris, your words never fail to leave me pleasantly stunned and smiling like a doofus.

i'm glad you find julius' lore amazing, that really touches my heart. at times i wonder if maybe i'm doing 'too much' with his backstory & his powers. but then i remember this is my blog & i make the rules dammit. it really reaffirms my thoughts to know that other people also enjoy his lore and his abilities. >w<

as always, i enjoy our convos. looking forward to chatting more via discord with ya. ˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗