drowning-bones-whump

[drowning-bones-whump]

I Want to Leave

With all of the things coming up, my head feels like it will physically split apart, and all I want to do is cry. Cry, and cry, and cry.

Cry until I melt into nothing. It makes me not want to feel anything anymore. It makes me wonder if there's something wrong with me when I want to lock myself away and never see the light of day anymore. When I just want to be alone, yet I still ask for attention from friends and family otherwise I'd feel lonely. It makes me ask if I'm really depressed, or if I'm just lying to myself and playing victim. After all, my life isn't that bad at all. It's not bad at all. I wonder if I'm ruining my own life. If I'm self-sabotaging. Thinking about it, I probably am. I can't bring myself to do anything except stay on my phone and scroll into eternity, even when there are important deadlines and assignments approaching. I end up not doing anything at all except just feeling pain from stress and muscle tension. I try to improve, but every time, I feel like I just drown and sink even deeper into what I tried to escape from. I feel like no matter how much my mother means well, I cannot help but put so much blame on her. I try to love her still. I try to listen to her. But it feels like she never listens to me. It only ever feels like she's talking at me, rather than with me. Nothing ever gets through, and I doubt it ever will. Every time we argue, or I am in her vicinity. Every time I hear her voice, it frustrates and annoys me. I hate that I resent her. But it's almost like I reject her to the very core of my being. I feel like there's always something wrong with me. That I'm wrong for the things I like. That the way I act is weird and never fits in quite well enough with the social norms. I feel restricted in my situation, and I wish I could just leave. But I can't. I just grow more tired. I still try, but I want to leave even more. I don't want to have to experience anything anymore, even with how many things I love, and knowing there are things I have enjoyed. What use are those things, if they can't help me when I'm in such deep pain? I hate that there is a side of me that has so much self-restraint that I can stop myself from disappearing. I wonder when that chain of restraint will break because there is nothing left to hold it together anymore. I wonder when my mind will erode enough, that I do just decide to bring myself to an end.

[drowning-bones-whump]

Stress and Tension Pains

Whumpee feeling so stressed, the tension and pain in their neck and shoulders being unbearable. No matter how much they try to stretch and flex, the pain always returns in a couple minutes because the stress never ends.

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How to serve c*nt in a $$60,000,000,000 way

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Drawing his scars made me so sad

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TW: whipping, blood

Everything hurt.

Every stroke of the whip scorched my back in flames of pain, every fiber of my resonating in absolute agony. Fresh blood from my back dripping down to bright marble floors, only making Master angrier.

The tender and sensitive skin of my ribs had already been abused, bruised from previous punishments when Master taught addressing them as “you” implied my position was not that of an inferior pet, but one of equal standing with Master. Now the whip’s end, with Master’s unskilled hands, licks around the same soft skin of my ribs and waist from my back, tearing it raw.

It hurts. I cry and beg but Master does not cease. I lose my senses.

[drowning-bones-whump]

Whumpee’s inability to sleep until they’re utterly exhausted from overworking themselves for their master. They’ve been well trained to do everything possible to please their master until they either collapse or faint from a forced shutdown to instinctually preserve themselves.

Whumpee who is too anxious to sleep/fighting the urge to sleep because they feel like don’t deserve it. After all, why would they deserve rest if they’re useless to master in all ways but one? When they’re only useful to master when they are in pain?

[drowning-bones-whump]

There is nothing more precious to me as a writer than the comments left on AO3. Whenever I get that email notification, I wonder what kind of comment was left. To have a little fun, I'm going to sort the typical comments into a few different categories and share my reactions to them as a writer.

If you feel I missed a comment type, please let me know. I'm curious to learn what other classifications you think exist (positive comment types only please - let's not make this negative). Also, if you wanted to tag yourself, I'd love you know what type of commenter you think you are.

The Polite Conversationalist - Your comment confirms that you read and enjoyed the fic or chapter. You offer praise for the author's efforts and encouragement for them to continue. - If this is you, please know that I'm imagining us holding a book club together. I brought us snacks.

The All Caps Reaction - You left the most unhinged comment. - You were screaming as you read it? I was screaming as I wrote it. Let's be friends.

The How Dare You - The angst is real. And painful. And I'm sorry but the story needed it. - This is a compliment of the highest order and I'm so glad you left it.

The Conspiracy Theorist - You are so invested that you are trying to figure out what comes next. - I'm so excited to read your ideas. They let me know the story tracks for you. And I'm either smiling because you guessed right and I'm excited for you to read what comes next, or I'm grinning because I know the plot twist is going to blow your mind.

The Catch-Up - You haven't commented in a while and are letting me know you are catching up. - I'm so glad you are back! I missed you. I know life gets busy and it means a lot to me that you took the time to read my story.

The Giggle - You laughed at my jokes and let me know. - Did we just become best friends? I'm already making you a bracelet.

The Callout - You found my favorite line in the chapter or fic. - I love you so much. You just made my day, my week, my month. Seriously, all the love for the reader. xoxo

[drowning-bones-whump]

Whumpee whose body is too used to being stressed. When their body isn’t stressed enough, their relaxed state is the trigger for their panic attacks. As such, whumpee can never truly relax and rest.

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TW: physical (mouth/dental) whump

Please let me know if there are any other TW I may have missed bc I’m very new at tagging and can miss (sometimes be just completely unaware out of ignorance) what should be mentioned in TW and tags.

Anyways, I hope y’all enjoy!

Maybe whumper restrains and forces whumpee to wear a metal contraption in their mouth causing immense aching/soreness and it keeps their mouth open so that whumper can access whumpee’s mouth whenever they want and press on the contraption to give them more pain.

Being unable to close their mouth, whumpee’s mouth becomes dry and their throat hurts. Only when whumper presses down on the contraption in their mouth and causes pain does their mouth begin to salivate excessively and drool to relieve the dryness in their mouth and throat. Whumpee begins to rely on whumper to sate their thirst.

Maybe whumper is trying to move whumpee’s teeth using the contraption to install something like a bit and bridle (permanently) into whumpee’s mouth using methods similar to how they drill dental implants into the jawbone to ensure it’s securely installed.

Now whumper can yank and tether whumpee’s head back by the reins when/wherever they want.