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i need you to understand something, right? me and a small group of people have been supporting ammar for months. he's just a baby we watched grow up. and you know? babies are supposed to gain weight over the months. he hasn't. it's horrible. the recent crisis with his medication? when i wrote that post i was in such a state of despair because i was convinced this infant i had watched and supported at great personal expense over several months would die. samah has lost hope for treating her own medical conditions - she's not fully healthy either - but she can't raise the money. people have NEVER donated consistently. me and a few others are at the end of our ropes having depleted ourselves trying to make up for what crowdfunding hasn't done. and i'm so overwhelmingly grateful to everyone who proved me wrong and got ammar's medicine.
but please...
can you help him again?
ammar needs milk too. it's not possible to get in gaza at a reasonable rate. it's $468 per carton and he needs 4 per week, for $1872.
and the thing is.
if ammar doesn't get milk, he will die.
0/1872
proof that this is going to her + her vetting here
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Yesterday a kid said to me "excuse me? Your hair looks like beautiful anime hair" which is already amazing and then she said "watch me on your camera when I go down the slide I'm going to do the Peter Griffin death pose when I come out" and she sure did.
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"Up in our bedroom, after the war..."
[Click for better quality, reblogs and tags highly appreciated]
Bonus: silly Bob and Yelena text thread and close ups
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Thanks, Anon!
-submit your poll!-
#sorta#I really like wearing colors like beige and brown bc I feel it compliments me nicely#and one time a friend told me that I looked great in brown and it made my week lol#polls
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10 or 11 little ducks have been spotted crossing the dash board
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i know theyâre having crazy 1999 green tinted dead end job office sex
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mysteries of our disguise revolve
clark kent (superman 2025) x f!reader

summary: youâre just the new intern at the daily planetâanxious, invisible in your books, and falling for the man who, disguised, saves the world between coffee breaks. he could catch the sky if it fell. but for some reason, he keeps choosing to catch you.
word count: 22.4k (i know itâs a lot but itâs worth it)
warnings/tags: +18 mdni, angst, banter, fluff !!!, clark has a savior complex, friends/coworkers to lovers, intern!reader, slow-burn office romance, lots of feelings and introspection, miscommunication, the readerâs sort of a sensitive and insecure gal at times, clark picks the reader up, mentions of reader's hair, both of them are very awkward at times, idiots in love (proceed with caution), declarations of love, p with plot, fingering (f receiving), handjob, oral (m and f receiving), whiny clark kent !!!, cum swallowing, p in v, missionary, happy ending.
a/n: first time writing for clark kent!!! to say iâm nervous would be the understatement of the century. i finally got to watch superman last week, and let me tell you: iâve been obsessed with it <3 i walked out of the theater and pretty much ran home to start writing this fic. so yes, this oneâs completely self-indulgent. i just got carried away by the feelings and couldnât stop writing, hence the length lol. i really hope you enjoy this story. if you do, likes, reblogs and comments mean the world. and feel free to scream in the tagsâiâll be screaming too đŤ
Sometimes, you truly wished you didnât have a brain.
It sounds ridiculous, worded like that. You know for a fact youâre not the first person to want a quiet mind, to dream of a day when youâre not held hostage by your own intrusive, spiraling thoughts. You take a look around and realize there are much bigger problems out there in the world.
Scratch thatâright here, where every few days, some inexplicable, monstrous creature appears out of the blue and starts tearing through everything that gets in its way, like Metropolis is a giant city made of Legos.
And yet, you canât help but drown in self-doubt. The worst part is how suddenly it all hits you. Thereâs no warning or mercy. One moment youâre fineâfunctioning, even laughingâand the next, something inside you flickers and dies. The illusion of confidence crumbles, and you're left looking for the broken pieces, wondering when youâll finally figure out whatâs wrong with you.Â
If only there were a way to cut it out, the rot, and replace it with something clean. Something shining. Something better.
The day youâre accepted for an internship at the Daily Planet, you stare at your reflection in the bathroom mirror and try to tell the girl in the fogged glass something that sounds like hope:
Itâs going to be okay. Youâre capable of this. Just show them your potential.
But the voice in your head isnât convinced. It places an imaginary hand on your shoulder, deceptively gentle, until its fingers dig in, cold and burning all at once. It leans in, just behind your ear, and hisses the thought youâve been trying to avoid:Â
Itâs only a matter of time before they realize they couldâve chosen someone better.
Just so much for a girl in her twenties.
You squint at the girl on Jimmyâs phone.
Sheâs beautiful. Blonde. The kind of effortlessly pretty that feels unfair. If you didnât know her from these selfies, you wouldâve thought she was some kind of model. Tall, blue-eyed, glowing with confidence. She even looks like the type of person whoâd throw a tantrum if someone accidentally stepped on a catâs tail.
Picking at your nails, your eyes flick from the screen to Jimmy. Then back again. Jimmy. Blonde girl. Jimmy. Blondeâ
âSheâs super pretty,â you say finally, handing the phone back to him over the desk divider.
He stands up with a smug little shrug, grinning as if heâs about to accept an award. âWhat can I say? Ladies just seem to love me.â
At that moment, Lois passes by right on cue, bracing herself on your desk and leaning toward Jimmy with a certain look that usually comes before total verbal destruction. âIâm still trying to figure out why,â she mutters dryly. âGuess I know what my next articleâs gonna be about.â
A giggle catches in your throat, too fast to stop, and you mask it with a fake cough.
Jimmy eyes you like youâve betrayed his loyalty. âYouâre supposed to be on my side. Proximity makes us allies.â
âIâm sorry. I just canât resist a good joke,â you mumble, lifting your hands in mock surrender, earning an exasperated sigh from him.
Lois high-fives you without missing a beat. âYou can always change seats.â
With a scoff, he declares, âTraitors. Both of you.â
As he launches into a dramatic defense of his dating history, Lois unwraps a candy bar, taking a bite before giving voice to her thoughts. âHonestly, I don't know why Clark gets away with disappearing for an hour and a half during lunch. I miss one deadline, and Iâve got Perry breathing down my neck.â
âEver heard of this revolutionary thing called⌠privacy?â Jimmy asks her, raising his eyebrows in her direction.
She rolls her eyes, gesturing with the candy bar. âIf I find out heâs out there eating real food while the rest of us are surviving on vending machine snacks, Iâm suing.â
You're about to jump in with an equally sarcastic remark when the elevator dings.
The doors quietly slide open, and there he is.
Clark Kent. Carrying a cardboard tray of four coffees, his tie slightly crooked and hair looking like the wind styled it for him on the way in. There's a coy tilt to his smile, like he knows heâs late but hopes this peace offering makes up for it.
âHey,â he says warmly. âThought we could all use a little caffeine. Fuel for the hardest part of the day.â
Lois lifts her chin. âLook who finally decided to rejoin society.â
Balancing the tray in one hand, he straightens his glasses. âI brought bribes.â He hands hers over first, the corner of his mouth quirking up. A second later, Jimmyâs follows, and he gives Clark a quick pat on the back.
Then, to your complete surprise, Clark holds one out to you. No matter how many times he does it, you still get excited by his thoughtfulness.
You blink owlishly. Your name's neatly written on one side of the cup with a permanent marker, just above your order: two creams, two sugars. He still remembers your order and has never gotten it wrong. You take it calmly, like it might vanish if you move too fast, struggling to fight the smile wanting to break free. âThanks, Clark.â
He bows his head, scratching the back of his neck, and looks up to meet your pleased gaze, studying how your expression softens. âYou know there's a legal limit to how many times you can say thank you in a day, right? Pretty sure youâve already gone over it.â
No clever, witty comeback comes to mind, so you turn back to your monitor, hoping the screen hides the heat crawling up your neck. Still, you canât help whispering a very soft, âThank you,â just before Clark turns on his heel and walks away.
He pauses for a split second, long enough to glance over his shoulder. His eyes land on yours again briefly, like heâs trying to find a hidden answer in your features, and he gives the smallest nod, almost imperceptible, continuing toward his desk, the hem of his coat swaying with each step.
Your heart flutters in your chest as you chew on your bottom lip, twisting your ankles together beneath the desk to keep from fidgeting, hoping youâre playing it cool.
âJeez,â a familiar voice mutters nearby. Jimmyâs shaking his head, arching a knowing brow. âYouâre down bad.â
âShut it.â
âI swear to God, if youâd just admit itââ
You lob a yellow highlighter at him, managing to hit him squarely on the shoulder with a satisfying thwack. He opens his mouth to protest, but you cut him off with a pointed finger. âKeep your voice down. Thereâs nothing to admit. Iâm just happy I have something to sip while I work. Thatâs all.â
Spinning lazily in his chair, he folds his arms behind his head like a painting of a man at peace. âIâve got to hand it to youâitâs adorable, watching you try to lie to me. Iâve been sitting across from you for what, a month now?â
A faint line appears between your brows, and you catch the highlighter as he tosses it back your way.
He grins. âIâve grown familiar with all your faces, young lady. And that dreamy look? The puppy eyes? That little tight-lipped smile?â He props his chin on his hand, his voice descending to a murmur. âYeah. Those arenât for public consumption. Thatâs VIP treatment.â
Fighting Jimmy is pointless. Heâs the kind of guy who never loses an argumentâmostly because he talks over you until you forget what your point even was.
He just doesnât get it. You can find someone attractive without liking them, right? Itâs just a stupid crush. A stupid work crush, to be precise, which is significantly worse than a normal one, because now the object of your hopeless affection walks past your desk on a daily basis like itâs nothing.
At some point, you stop being sure if you're trying to convince Jimmy or yourself.
Your brain whirs back to your very first day at the Daily Planet. You remember being led around by a chatty woman from HR, who kept smiling at you with what appeared to be feigned sympathy. She pointed out the break room, the vending machine, and in the end brought you to your new, empty desk right across from a redheaded guy who immediately stood and extended a hand.
âJames Olsen,â he commented. âWelcome to hell.â
Before you could respond, he waved Lois over from a few desks away. âLois, come meet the new intern.â
You told them your name, attempting to seem casual while subtly folding your arms across your chest like a human shield. You didnât mention you already knew who they were, or the fact that youâd read Loisâs columns like gospel. Some things were better kept to yourself.
Then, along came Perry White. The Perry White. It only took you one glance at the man to recognize him: the iconic gruff editor-in-chief with a permanent scowl and a cigar that looked surgically attached to his mouth. He stomped over, barely glancing your way.
âWhereâs Kent?â he grumbled, words muffled by the cigar between his lips.
Lois and Jimmy exchanged a look. Silence. Apparently, no one felt like volunteering information.
Kent, as in Clark Kent. The name alone triggered something weird in your stomach. He was the guy who somehow landed exclusive interviews with Superman like it was no big deal, most of which youâd devoured in one sitting.
In the nick of time, as if heâd heard his name from afar, Clark entered through the elevator, brushing his fringe to the side with one hand. Slung over one of his shoulders was a worn satchel bag, and in the other, he carried a cardboard tray, loaded with steaming coffee cups. He spotted Perry and made his way over, towering over pretty much everyone in the immediate vicinity.
âI know, Iâm late again. Sorry, Perry,â he apologized, already reaching into the tray. âMaybe a hot coffee will help start your day?â
Perry grunted, took a cup, and walked away without another word. Clark contemplated him as he got farther and farther away, and once he was gone, turned back to the rest of you with a quiet exhale. âReally glad I bought an extra one today.â
Only two cups of coffee remained. He handed Jimmy and Lois theirs, then scanned the tray, his brows snapping together. His gaze landed on you, standing just a little behind the group, hands clasped awkwardly in front of you. That was when it hit him.
âOh, Iâmââ he stammered, fixing his posture. âI didnât know there would be someone new. Iâm so sorry, I wouldâve brought you something too.â
âThis is the new intern,â Jimmy supplied casually, taking a trial sip of his drink. âStarted today. Doesnât bite, probably. Has a name and everything.â
You offered a nervous little smile, giving Clark your name.
Clark repeated it under his breath, as if he was trying to memorize it. His attention flicked back to the empty tray, later returning to you. âNext time, Iâll make sure to bring you one. What do you usually get?â
Shaking your head, you tried to wave it off. âNo, really, itâs okay. You donât have toââ
But Clark shook his own head right back, stubborn and visibly determined. âI insist.â
Jimmy leaned in, elbowing him. âNo, for realâhe insists.â
Lois smirked into her cup. âHe's going to agonize over this all day.â
Clarkâs ears reddened as he cast a glance at you again. âJust... let me know. So I get it right.â
Ultimately, you ended up telling him your order: two creams, two sugars. He nodded seriously, and repeated it: âTwo creams, two sugars.â
âBetter write it on your arm or something,â Jimmy interjected, sitting down on his chair. âIn case it comes up in your next Superman interview.â
The next morning, you were late. Disastrously, embarrassingly late. Not just five-minutes-past-start-time late. More like why-even-bother-showing-up late.
You burst through the front doors of the Daily Planet like a fugitive fleeing a crime scene, lungs clawing for air, sweat clinging to your lower back and pooling around your temples. The last ten blocks had been a blur of dodged pedestrians and half-choked apologies, and every eye in the office felt like it had turned your way.
Avoiding eye contact, you slid into your seat. It was only your second day, and already youâd earned a reputation: the intern who canât be punctual. What would be next? Forgetting your name? Accidentally setting the printer on fire? Calling Perry âdad���? You were so far inside your own head you barely registered the beverage sitting on your desk.
A lone paper coffee cup. You froze.
It was from the cafĂŠ around the corner, the same one Clark brought coffee from yesterday. An orange Post-it was stuck to the side, curling slightly at the corners, your name written just beneath it.
Hope you have a good time here. The handwriting was clean and tidy, with no signature, though you knew who had written it.
Your fingers brushed the cup tentatively, and the warmth seeped into your fingers, anchoring you in a moment that felt strangely tender. It was a small gesture, but it had found you when you were at your most unravelled, and somehow, that made it hit harder than it should have.
Glancing up, you noticed Clark was already seated at his desk, typing with ease. When your eyes met, he didnât look away, just lifted a hand in a soft wave.
Before you could even process it, Jimmy bent over the partition, nodding at the cup. âWow,â he uttered, pressing a hand to his chest. âOn day two? Must be nice to be his favorite.â
âExcuse me?â
âNext thing you know, heâs bringing you lunch and rescheduling your dentist appointments.â
âItâs just coffee,â you retorted, but your hands didnât loosen around the cup, clutching it like it contained the secret to world peace.
âObserve: the flustered intern in her natural habitat, attempting to rationalize a clear romantic gestureââ
âDonât you have any photographs to take?â
His nose crinkled. âDonât worry, Iâll keep your tragic office romance off the record. For now.â
To shut him up, you took a long sip, and immediately burned your tongue. Of course. When you glanced over again, Clark was observing you with mild alarm, eyes wide, like he wasnât sure if he should intervene. But then he returned to his screen, his shoulders just a little stiffer than before, and you looked back down at the cup. The note.
You werenât saying that was when the crush started. But it sure didnât help.
Fast forward to the present day, your fingers have been levitating over the keyboard for an embarrassing amount of time, the blinking cursor taunting you like it knows. You just hope nobodyâs noticed the light leaving your eyes as you spiraled into a memory that felt much warmer than the air-conditioned newsroom.
You turn your head to the left for what you swear will be the last time today, though deep down, you know thatâs a lie. A practiced one at this point. Clark is already typing, posture relaxed but focused, forearms braced against the desk. Heâs moved his chair today, and the faint movement of the muscles beneath the back of his white shirt makes you blink hard, as if that might reset your brain.
âPerv,â Jimmy interrupts your thoughts in a sing-song voice, not even bothering to look up from his computer.
You jab the side of his ankle with your shoe.
He hisses, eyes squinting shut. âTell me Iâm wrong.â
You donât. What frightens you the most is that perhaps he has clocked you right. Straightening in your chair, you roll your shoulders back like you can shake it off. Crushes pass. This one will as well. Maybe by the time your internshipâs ended.
Taking a sharp breath, you decide you need to get back to work. You canât afford another mistake just because Clark Kent exists in the same room as you.
An email lands in your inbox. Itâs one of many, the kind you handled almost without thinking twice. The task in it was far from difficult: skim the article, fix the typos, clean up the formatting, and make sure the version that goes online looked as polished as something with your name near it should. Routine. Safe.
At first, you donât even flinch. Youâre wearing headphones, the world on mute, until Jimmy taps your shoulder and motions for you to take them off. The moment you do, the noise rushes in. You register the low hum of tension in the room, and then comes the voice of one of your coworkers, shouting across the bullpen that an unedited version of an article had been published.
Silently, heads begin turning to find the culprit. And still, you donât let yourself panic. Not until you hear the title.
Beneath the Streets, Above the Skies: The Creatures We Canât Explain.
Itâs yours.
Goddammit.
Your stomach flips as you scroll through the now-public piece on the Daily Planetâs website. Itâs all there: the all-caps notes left by the writer mid-draft, barking out instructions to a future editor.
[FIX THIS. TOO WORDY.]
[DELETE â USE STAT FROM EARLIER DRAFT?]
[MAYBE CHOOSE A STRONGER QUOTE HERE.]
Youâd sent the wrong version. Drafts mixed up, tabs blurred together, one careless attachment. And worst of all? You werenât the one to catch it. By the time someone did, it had already been up long enough to embarrass the paper.
The article is eventually pulled, of course, but it had already been read by others.
A few people come to your rescue, trying to comfort you with those well-meaning phrases that sting more than they soothe.
Itâs fine. Happens to the best of us.
Donât beat yourself up over it.
Itâs just one article.
Lois, in a moment of impossible generosity, offers to buy you an entire chocolate cake if itâll get you to smile. She says it with a lopsided grin, trying to lighten the mood, but you can see it in her face, the silent sympathy. The confirmation that⌠yes, it had been bad.
What makes it worse is that it confirms what you already suspected about yourself: youâre not good at this. The little voice in your head, the one that is usually subdued by the clack of keyboards, is now screaming. You can hear going insane it in the spaces between your thoughts and heartbeats.
You had one job. Youâve been here for over a month, and you still managed to screw it up.
Panic blooms in slow, suffocating waves, rising behind your ribs and poisoning your bloodstream. You walk to Perryâs office on numb legs that barely feel like they are attached to the rest of your body. Your name had been called moments before. Knocking once, you step inside, your back flat against the cool surface of the door.
He doesnât even look up right away. Just keeps reading something on his screen. âSomething bothering that young brain of yours?â he asks without turning. âBecause if youâre not going to be focused, I need to know. I donât do hand-holding. This couldâve been a disaster.â
Your heart pounds so loudly youâre surprised he doesnât pause to comment on it. When he finally decides to spare you a glance, it isnât anger youâre met with. He looks tired, and even irritated, that he has to explain these things to you at all.
âDonât be sloppy. I donât like sloppy. Got it?â
Fervently nodding, you say, âYes, sir.â You might grant him a smile, or perhaps something close enough to one, anyway. Then you leave, holding yourself together, and storm out of his office.
The newsroom is all windows and noise, impossible to disappear into, but taking the elevator isnât a viable option at the moment. The stairwell, by contrast, is dim and forgotten, since no one uses it unless the elevators break down. That makes it a perfect place for you to hide.
You sit on the concrete steps and fold in on yourself, allowing yourself to cry. Sweaty palms pressed to your face, tugging at your hair like it might anchor you in your body. Silent sobs wrack your chest, and tears slip down your face, pooling at the edges of your mouth, making their way towards your chin and neck. Your knees draw to your chest, and you let yourself dissolve into shuddering breaths.
You arenât just crying over the article, or the look Perry gave you, or the shame you saw in every pair of eyes that passed your desk.
Youâre crying because at some point, without you even noticing, youâd let yourself believe that maybeâmaybeâyou were starting to belong here. That maybe you werenât a complete fraud. It turns out it doesnât take much to unravel those thoughts. Just one mistake. One article. One email you shouldâve double-checked.
A couple of minutes pass, and you hear the door being opened and then shut. Youâre too far gone by then: cheeks damp, fingers gripping your knees, shoulders drawn tight toward your ears. The sound of someoneâs footsteps approaching you makes your stomach lurch, and instinctively, you swipe at your face, trying to clean yourself up with the heel of your palm as if that could erase the fact youâve been crying.
You hear it. His voice.
ââŚHey.â
Clark.
You rub your eyes, keeping your gaze fixed on a chipped bit of concrete near your foot, your throat too raw to answer.
Thereâs a pause. You donât even hear him move, yet you feel him there, not close enough to crowd you, but not far enough either. He waits. Itâs his thing, apparently.
Before you can stop yourself, you speak. âIâm fine,â you croak, too quickly. A reflex.
He doesnât reply right away. A beat slides, and he mutters, âDidnât ask.â
That earns a weak exhale from you. Not exactly laughter, but akin to it. You rest your forehead on your knees, and because you canât help it, because itâs bubbling up and thereâs nowhere else for it to go, you start talking. More like rambling, actually.
âI was tired, and I was trying to finish it fast, and I thought Iâd already attached the right file, andââ You stop, inhaling sharply. âGod, Iâm pathetic.â
Clark still says nothing. You risk a glance in his direction and find him standing just a few steps down from you, one hand loosely resting on the railing.
You interpret his demeanor as an invitation to go on. âItâs so stupid. Everyoneâs supposed to make mistakes. Thatâs what they say. But this doesnât feel like a mistake. It feels like confirmation. That I shouldnât be here. That Iâm playing pretend, and now everyone can see it.â
Itâs only a matter of time before your voice cracks, and you suck in a breath like it might steady you, but it only makes your chest hurt.
Gently, without needing to say anything, he sits down beside you, leaving just enough space so you donât feel boxed in. You feel the warmth radiating off his body even through the distance. A comforting kind of heat.
âI didnât want anyone to see me like this,â you croak. âItâs miserable.â
âItâs not.â
You shake your head, and the tears come back again for a second round, your whole frame shaking. More tears. You thought you were done.
Thatâs when you feel it. The hesitant pressure of his hand between your shoulder blades. He doesnât move it, just lets it rest there, warm as you continue to cry your heart out. Youâre pretty sure he must think youâve gone mental. Once he notices youâre not backing away from his touch, he begins rubbing your skin in small, slow circles. No pressure. No expectation.
Eventually, after long minutes of trying to even your breath, you shift toward him on instinct, and he opens his arms, enveloping you. You fold into the space he makes for you, still trembling, trying to convince yourself this isnât humiliating. His chest is solid against your cheek, and he smells like cologne and paper and something sweet you canât quite place.
You donât ask why he came. You believe you already have your answer. Lois probably saw you bolt. Maybe Jimmy sent him. Maybe he drew the short straw.
It turns out you say it out loud, because Clark speaks gently into your hair. âNo one sent me.â
You choke on your own saliva.
âI just noticed youâd been gone for a while,â he adds. âThatâs all.â
Pulling back a little, just enough to look at him in the eye, you find his expression to be unreadable in that Clark Kent way. âI didnât even realize I was gone that long,â you admit.
He smiles, barely. âI know.â
A long silence hangs in the air between you. Not uncomfortable, but thick with things unsaid.
Then he asks, almost like he already knows what youâll respond next: âWhy are you so hard on yourself?â
You laugh, though it comes out watery and bitter. âI donât know how else to be.â
He watches you for a moment. The world outside the stairwell feels a thousand miles away.
âI think,â Clark begins carefully, âyou hold yourself to this impossible standard. You think if you slip up, everyone will rub it in your face.â You stare at him, swallowing hard. âBut no oneâs waiting to punish you,â he explains. âThey already like you. I alreadyââ He stops himself mid-sentence. âYou donât have to earn that every second.â
His hand is still on your back. You donât know what youâre supposed to say to that, so you just sit there with him. With yourself, and with everything youâre carrying. The silence lingers, suspended in time, and you canât help but sniff after all that crying. Youâre certain your eyes must be far beyond puffy and red-rimmed, your face blotchy, and you donât even want to think about what your mascaraâs looking like right now.
âWas itââ You hesitate, keeping eye contact. âWas it a lot? That I hugged you?â
Clarkâs brows bump together in a scowl. âWhat do you mean?â
âI meanââ You gesture vaguely between your chests. âIt was a full, like⌠torso-on-torso kind of hug. Which feels very much like a panic-hug. And Iâve only been working here a month, and youâre⌠you.â
His smile widens, carving those charming, endearing hollows into his cheeks. âI donât mind.â
âYeah, but I do. You probably have, like, policies about emotionally unstable interns clinging to you.â
âIf thereâs a policy, I havenât read it.â
âFigures. Of course, you read everything except the employee handbook.â
Playfully surrendering, he snorts. âGuilty.â
Thereâs a beat. He looks like heâs considering something as those blue eyes of his map your face.
âWant to hear something thatâll make you regret hugging me at all?â
You scratch your nose. âSure?â
âWhat do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?â
ââŚNo.â
He grins, too pleased with himself. âA thesaurus.â
âOh my God.â
âI warned you.â
âNo, butâa thesaurus?â
âWhat do you mean? Itâs a classic!â
âI shouldâve hugged Perry instead. Or the janitor. Literally anyone else.â
âThat hurts. I opened my arms to you.â
âI did the arm-opening,â you shoot back. âYou were just conveniently located.â
Heâs chuckling, but his expression softens again when he sees you swipe under your eyes. You try to smile. You try. And it almost works, until your voice comes out small again. âI just didnât want to mess up. I wanted to be good at this.â
âYou are. Messing up doesnât make you less good. Youâd never say that to another human being.â
You look at him. The way he says it makes you understand he believes it. Youâre not used to that. Most people say things like that with ifs and buts tacked on. Clark doesnât. He just lets the truth sit there between you. Pressing your lips together, you gape at your lap, and then back at him.
ââŚOkay,â you whisper.
âOkay,â he echoes.
A pause.
âWanna hear another one?â
âClark, pleaseââ
âWhat do you call fake spaghetti?â
âI donât even want to think about that one.â
âAn impasta.â
You groan louder, forehead tipping dramatically against his shoulder. âJust fire me already.â
Clark giggles, not moving an inch. âCanât. Iâm just the delivery guy.â
âOf terrible puns?â
âOf coffee and emotional support.â
You laugh, this time for real, short and soggy and kind of breathless. In this tiny stairwell, with your head spinning and your chest still aching, this had been exactly what you needed.
By the time youâre both standing again, your eyes feel like theyâve been rubbed back and forth with sandpaper. You wipe at your face with the sleeve of your cardigan, though Clark hands you a tissue without saying anything. You take it, thanking him while intending to fix your appearance in the reflection of his glasses.
âYou always carry tissues with you?â
âA man needs to be prepared.â
He doesnât rush you, although both of you know that eventually you have to go back. âReady?â he asks gently.
You nod like a liar, returning to the office. Jimmy spots you the second the door to the stairwell opens. He stands near the copy machine, holding a mug shaped like the Daily Planetâs globe, and raises his eyebrows like heâs seeing something scandalous. Lois leans out of her cubicle and gives Clark a slow look, then swings her gaze to you.
âWell, well,â she murmurs, wrapping a loose strand of hair around her finger. âWe thought youâd fled the country.â
Jimmy snorts into his coffee. âI must confess Iâve never tried stairwell therapy. Sounds very promising.â
Clark clears his throat, cheeks just slightly pink. âShe was just upset. Thatâs all.â Inching toward you, he whispers into your ear, âYou sure youâre okay?â
You nod, and this time, itâs not entirely a lie. Your chest twists a little: not from embarrassment, but from the warm way everyone seems to be looking at you. You sit back at your desk, and Jimmy passes you a couple of snacks wordlessly, winking at you.
Lois throws a scrunchie at your head, giving you a thumbs up. âFix your face,â she says. âIf you cry again, youâll dehydrate and die. And I donât have time to explain that to Perry.â
Your throat tightens again, but for entirely different reasons.
You like Lois.
You really, really do.
Sheâs sharp-tongued and sharp-minded, the kind of journalist who could scare a senator into answering a question theyâve been dodging for a decade. She doesnât soften herself to fit the room. If anything, the room adjusts to her. You admire that. You admire her.
You trust her, too, in the weird way you trust people after you decided not to trust them at all.
Which is why it catches you off guard, the quiet pinch in your chest when you see her standing next to Clark, cackling. And him, tittering the way he does when heâs truly listening, the corners of his eyes crinkling just barely behind his glasses.
They look like puzzle pieces that have known each other forever.
In your defense, this was all supposed to be a harmless observation. Youâre standing next to the copier, waiting for it to spit out your stack of edited pages.
All of a sudden, the copier beeps, and you jerk away.
âHey.â Jimmy materializes out of nowhere behind you, nearly making you drop your stack. âYou okay? You look like you just found out your favorite character dies in the end.â
You force a laugh, too high-pitched. âNo, I was justâŚthinking. That Clark and Lois would make a good couple. Like, objectively. Theyâre veryâŚcompatible.â
Jimmy blinks.
Then blinks again.
Then tilts his head as if youâre announcing youâre moving to Mars. âWhatâwhy would you say that?â
You stare at him, and the weight of what youâd just admitted out loud hits you like a train.
âIâve picked up this terrible habit of saying my thoughts out loud,â you half-whisper, burying your face in the warm papers youâve just printed. âYou didnât need to know that.â
âHold on, hold on.â Jimmy steps in front of you, looking way too interested. âBack up. You think Clark and Lois are compatible?â
The copier makes an unholy crunching noise, and you yank the paper tray open, because you donât want to meet his demanding gaze. âI meant it likeâŚas a neutral statement,â you lie, badly. âA purely objective, journalistic observation. A general public-interestâŚthing.â
âLike youâre a neutral third-party scientist, observing the wild mating rituals of the office?â
âExactly.â
âYouâre so not a neutral third party. That might be the worst save Iâve ever heard.â
âGive me a break.â
âNo, seriously, this is interesting. Tell me more about this neutral thought process. Was it before or after you began looking at Clark like he personally invented gravity?â
âDrop it, Jimmy.â
Jimmy looms closer the copier, puffing out his chest, looking way too smug for someone who sometimes accidentally deletes half his own files. âListen. I love Lois. Everyone loves Lois. But Clark and Lois? No way.â
You glanced at him. âWhat do you mean âno wayâ? TheyâreâŚtheyâre them.â
âYou said it yourself. Iâve seen Clark, a grown man, blushing when someone compliments his tie. You think Lois has time for that?â
You donât answer right away. Your gaze drifts back to Clark, whoâs now scribbling into his notepad while Lois steals the last bite of his muffin, and you force yourself to avert your attention from that scene. What you believe to be the truth sits heavy in your stomach, even as you joke around.
Because hereâs the thing: this isnât Loisâs fault. Youâd fight anyone who said a bad word about herâso why does it still sting? Why does some ugly voice in your head start listing every way you fall short in comparison? This profound ache that you feel isnât about her, not really. Itâs about you: about how you always seem to be two steps behind the version of yourself youâre supposed to be.
Comparison is a cruel game, especially when the other player doesnât even know sheâs on the board.
Jimmy nudges your arm, the teasing gone a little softer. âHey. Donât overthink it.â
Youâre fiddling with an old bracelet that dangles from your wrist. âYouâre only about thirty years too late.â Gathering your pages, holding them a little too tightly, you take a step back. âI should get back to work.â You choose that to be your response, given itâs easier than saying I donât want to feel like this, or I wish I didnât care, or I think Iâm falling for him, and I donât know how to stop.
And because the alternative is staying here and letting Jimmy be right.
Again.
They arrange the plan casually, almost in passing. Someone mentions something about finally clocking out, someone else brings up the bar a few blocks away from the building, and then Lois chimes in with, âWeâre all going, no excuses,â unwilling to take no for an answer.
And somehow, that settles it.
The sun dips low as the office empties, everyone spilling into the street with sleeves rolled and voices louder than theyâve been all day. You walk a step behind Jimmy, whoâs listing the barâs drink specials like heâs memorized them for a play he forgot to audition for.
The night has that kind of electricity. The possibility of being something good. Memorable.
The barâs noisy in the comforting way only post-work places could be: the hum of old songs, clinking glasses, the rise and fall of casual arguments about baseball, or film, or whether Perry White had once owned a parrot (Jimmy swears yes, Lois says no, and Clark just answers âIâm afraid I have no parrot knowledgeâ).
You don't mean to drink your first cocktail that fast. You just... forget to pace yourself, but it helps, giving you permission to just exist. Laugh at Jimmyâs impressions. Pretend youâre not glancing at Clark more than you should.
The group is gathered near a back booth when Clark slips away. You only notice because itâs like a light flicks off inside you. When you spot him through the bar windowâoutside, on the sidewalk, phone pressed to his ear, fingers pushing through his hairâyou follow without thinking.
You donât hesitate, slipping through the crowd and nudging the door open, letting it swing closed behind you.
He half-turns at the sound, catching you in his peripheral. A tiny smile lifts the corner of his mouth. He raises a single finger as if to say: One sec. So you lean against the wall beside the door, letting the cool air cling to your skin, internally cursing yourself for not putting on your coat before going out.
âOkay, Ma. Yeah, Iâll give him a call tomorrow. No, I promise, itâs fine. Yeah. Yeah, love you too. Sleep tight,â he says into his phone, ending the call and tucking the device into the pocket of his black slacks. âSorry. That was my mom. Sometimes she calls without checking the time first. She gets all excited.â
You smile, your mouth twitching. âThatâs⌠adorable.â
He shrugs, glancing down at his feet, almost bashful. âSheâs always worried Iâm working too much.â
âWell, are you?â
His eyes find yours, and for a second, he doesnât answer. At long last, he retorts, âMaybe.â
You study himâthe way his posture seems to be at ease out here, how the line of his shoulders relaxes in the quiet. Thereâs something about him that always feels held back, as if heâs managing himself carefully, like heâs afraid of taking up too much space.
Which is funny, considering how much space heâs been occupying in your thoughts lately.
âAre you annoyed?â you ask.
His smile fades. âWhat?â
âYou seemed⌠I donât know. Off.â
âNo,â he says, seemingly caught off guard. âNot annoyed.â You nod slowly, unsure if thatâs a real answer or the kind people give when they donât want to be asked twice. âI just needed some air. Thatâs all.â
You let that sit between you. Let the quiet stretch a little. The last thing you want is to pry, but thereâs something you want to know. It seems that lately you always want to know more with him, even when youâre afraid of the answers you might receive.
Next thing you know, your brain, being the traitor it is, decides now would be the perfect time to blurt: âSo, uh⌠are you and Lois a thing?â It comes out too fast and loud, way too sincere. You immediately want to grab the words midair and cram them back into your mouth.
Clark straightens so quickly itâs like someone snapped a rubber band on his arm, his jaw clenching. âWhat?â The pitch of his voice cracks up a little, like his vocal cords havenât gotten the memo that heâs supposed to be cool and composed.
âYou and Lois?â you repeat, trying to style it as harmless curiosity. You throw in a half-shrug that feels more like a full-body spasm. âI mean⌠itâs not a crazy question. Sheâs Lois Lane. Beautiful woman, insanely good hair. Iâd date her.â
âSheâd eat you alive.â
âYeah, but itâd be an honor.â
âLois and I are just friends. Really good friends. Weâve been through a lot together, but⌠itâs never been like that.â
Looking down, you nod in agreement, peering at your heels. Did they always have that much shine? You shift your weight, unsure where to put your hands. âGreat,â you reply. âI wasnât trying to make things weird. Itâs justâpeople talk, you know? Office gossip. Background noise. Someone had to ask.â
Clark cocks his head to the side, his forehead creasing. âSomeone?â
âYeah. I was just the unfortunate soul selected by the people. Took one for the team.â
He smiles then. âThe team.â
âYeah. Julie from Sports. And, uh⌠Carl.â
âCaro?â
âYeah,â you say, faking confidence. âHeâs new. Big into Hawaiian shirts. Youâd remember him if youâd seen him. That dudeâs hilarious.â
âRight.â He huffs out another quiet laugh, gesturing vaguely toward the bar. âWanna go back inside?â
You shake your head. âActually... I think Iâm heading home.â
âOh. You sure?â
âCertainly. Iâm just tired. Itâs been a long week. Brain soup.â
âI get that,â he says, softer now. But he doesnât move. âDo you want me to call you a cab?â
âRelax. I can get one myself. Last time I checked, I still owned a phone.â
He still doesnât budge. âOr⌠I could walk you home.â
âYou really donât have to.â
âI know.â Heâs already turning toward the door. âWait here. Iâll grab our stuff.â
And just like that, he disappears inside, the door swinging shut behind him with an almost faint thud.
The moment heâs gone, you let your head fall back against the bricks and close your eyes. It hadnât been in your plans to ask about Lois. Actually, you hadnât planned for any of this. You just saw him step outside and followed like gravity stopped being theoretical.
But sometimes, he looks at you like he sees something you donât, which is the part that terrifies you.
The door creaks open behind you. You straighten quickly, trying to shake off whatever expression you were wearing. Clark has your bag slung over one shoulder and your coat draped carefully over his arm. He looks absurdly responsible.
âYou really didnât have to do all that,â you say as he hands everything over to you.
âToo late,â he replies. âChivalry wins again.â
You walk the first few blocks in companionable silence. The city has started to go quiet, and even though the night is soft, your brain isnât.
Then, because the world is poetic when itâs inconvenient, your heel catches a crack in the pavement and you go down like a cursed fairytale. âShitâdamn it!â
âWhoaâgot you,â Clark huffs, catching you just in time. His hands are at your waist, strong and certain, and you hate how easily your pulse betrays you.
You wince. âAnkle. Ow.â
He guides you down to sit on the front steps of a random building, pursing his lips. He crouches, eyes scanning your foot like heâs searching for something under the skin. âProbably just a twist. You should be alright.â
âHow do youâŚ?â
âWhat?â
âHow do you know itâs not swelling?â you ask, scrutinizing him. âYou barely looked. Didnât even check it properly.â
âJust⌠a hunch, I meanââ His mouth opens, then closes, and then opens again with a whole new sentence. âLook, I didnât hear anything snap, so... unless your bones are stealthy...?â
âThatâs not exactly how ankles work.â
âI mean, you havenât turned purple. That has to be a good sign.â He laughs, tight and awkward, and you snort despite yourself. His hand rakes through his hair. âSorry. Just trying to be optimistic.â
âYou sure you werenât a paramedic in a past life?â
âOh, no. Iâd be terrible at that.â
Still, you watch him a second longer. He looks... nervous, like heâs afraid he said too much.
He kneels with his back to you. âHere. Get on.â
âExcuse me?â
âPiggyback. Letâs not make it a thing.â
âItâs already a thing. A humiliating one.â
âLet me reframe it: this is me being chivalrous, and you being temporarily horizontal.â
âThat is not how that word works.â You sigh, dramatic. âFine. Just⌠please, donât drop me.â
As you climb onto his back, his hands reach back to catch the backs of your knees, and when his palms find skinâwarm where your skirtâs ridden up slightlyâit short-circuits something in your chest. Itâs not even overtly intimate. Itâs just⌠contact. Unflinching contact. You feel it like a current, a hot spark that rushes up your spine and settles somewhere inconvenient.
âHave I already mentioned this is embarrassing?â you mutter, resting your chin lightly against his shoulder.
âYou say that like Iâm not honored.â
âIâm a grown woman. Youâre carrying me like a backpack.â
âYou are basically a human backpack,â he quips back. âAnd kind of a noisy one.â
You smack his shoulder gently, making him laugh. You let your eyes drift closed for a second, his back is broad under your touch. You become aware of how safe it feels, how easy it is to trust him.
âClark?â
âHmm?â
âYou didnât even blink when I said I hurt my ankle. Like you already knew it wasnât serious.â
He pauses. âI had a feeling.â
You lean back slightly to see his face, though the angle mostly gives you a view of his glasses and the top of his cheekbone. âYouâre weird.â
Smirking, he glances sideways just enough for you to catch it. âTakes one to know one.â
You let it drop, at least out loud. But your brain doesnât. It files this away with the other strange Clark Kent momentsâthe way he sometimes seems to flinch at distant sirens, or how youâd swear he once turned around because someone two desks over whispered his name.
By the time you reach your apartment, your ankle has started throbbing again, a dull ache radiating up your calf. Clark shifts slightly to let you down as you fumble for your keys.
You arenât exactly drunk, but your head definitely feels funny. âHere we are,â he says, and you slid off his back and onto the ground like a sack of potatoes with a masterâs degree.
âThanks,â you mumble, trying to stand in a way that suggests grace and control. âYou can, um. You can go be normal now.â
He sticks his hands in his pockets. âI was normal before.â
âThatâs debatable.â You finally open the door, triumphant, but instead of going in, you linger in the doorway, facing him. âThanks for the rescue. Again. Iâll see you Monday?â
âYeah,â he says softly. âGoodnight.â
He doesnât move, and neither do you. Your fingers tighten around the doorknob.
Thereâs an unexpected pull in your chest. The way his collar is rumpled. The way his hair curls behind his ears. The way the night had been soft, and the sidewalk felt warmer when he walked beside you, andâ
An unbeatable desire to kiss him invades your whole being. You want to touch his jaw and feel the shape of his mouth and know what it would be like to exist under his hands. To be held by Clark Kent.
He finally steps back, appearing reluctant. âYou might want to put some ice on it. Maybe take something for the pain?â
âYes, sir.â
âAnd give me a call if it gets worse.â
âOnly if I want to be carried again.â
âHappy to oblige.â
And thenâfinallyâhe walks away. You close the door behind you, pressing your forehead to the wood, heart knocking hard against your ribs.
Youâre beyond head over heels.
Another Monday at the Daily Planet. Itâs 8:56am, and as the elevator doors open with a cruel little ding, you carefully step out, checking your surroundings.
Everything looks the sameâthe hum of all those computers, some colleague having a hard time with the copier, Perry barking out unintelligible orders in the distanceâbut you are not the same. Not since last Friday.
Your ankleâs still a little sore, you havenât been sleeping well, and Clark Kent could be somewhere in this building, existing like a real person with real hands and a real mouth you definitely didnât imagine kissing at least ten times this weekend.
You weave through desks, praying for invisibility, whenâ
âMorning, sunshine,â Jimmy sing-songs from his chair, already halfway through a bagel, a smile plastered on his face. âHowâs the foot?â
âClark told you,â you say flatly.
Jimmy gives you a look, his eyes going round with faux innocence. âWho, me? No! I just assumed you mysteriously developed a limp and Clark suddenly discovered how to piggyback people from years of quiet farm strength.â
âI cannot believe he told you.â
âOh, come on. Itâs adorable.â Jimmy leans back in his chair, using his feet to make it spin. âYou? Carried through the city like a Victorian maiden? I wish I had footage. Iâd set it to music.â
âI hate you.â
He stops spinning to point his bagel at you. âYou say that, but I think you secretly love being the main character.â
âDo I look like someone who enjoys attention?â
âNot attention in general. Just his.â
You donât dignify that with a response. Mostly because heâs not wrong, and your face is already betraying you. Sliding into your chair, you pretend to focus on your monitor like it contains NASA launch codes.
Maybe if you donât look up, youâll avoidâ
âMorning,â Clark says gently, materializing beside your desk. You look up, and there he is. Soft smile. Soft eyes. Probably soft everything.
You panic and blurt the most neutral, irrelevant thing your brain can conjure: âDid you see that viral video of the goose chasing the guy through Centennial Park?â
Clark blinks. âI havenât.â
âCrazy stuff. Natureâs relentless.â
â...Okay.â
You clear your throat, willing yourself not to combust.
âAnyway,â Clark continues with his inquiry, âI just wanted to check in. Howâs the ankle doing?â
âFine! Yep. Great. I can do five jumping jacks. Not that I have, but I could.â
He raises his eyebrows, visibly amused. âThatâs good to know.â
âCool,â you reply, cringing on the inside. âCool, cool, cool, cool.â
And then you both just stand there, marinating in awkward silence. Eventually, Clark raises a hand in greeting and excuses himself to his desk, not before placing your usual coffee next to your keyboard. You thank him without managing to meet his eyes.
Your fingers hover near the cup, though you donât pick it up right away. The warmth radiates against your skin. Youâre aware of everythingâyour pulse, your breath, the tight flutter in your chest.
You try to return to your work. Really, you do. Itâs just that your thoughts donât seem to line up in a straight line today, and somehow English doesnât even feel like your mother tongue anymore.
Then Jimmy slides a folder across your desk. âPerry wants you to proofread this by noon. No pressure. Except all the pressure.â
You sigh, taking a sip of coffee and trying to remember how to be a functioning adult. Youâve got a job to do, feelings to repress, and exactly three hours until lunch.
Later that day, after a full shift spent second-guessing every adjective you typed and rereading all those drafts like they were confessionals, you finally make it home.
Shoes abandoned by the door. Work shirt flung somewhere in your hallway. The glow of your laptop waits on the coffee table, your latest half-thought article still open, the cursor blinking, mercifully patient.
You settle into the couch with a sigh and think: this, at least, is something.
And thenâyou notice it. A crucial absence.
Your charger.
Still plugged in beneath your desk at the Daily Planet like itâs mocking you. Of course. Of course the universe wants you to suffer. As you reach for your phone, ready to spiral, it buzzes in your hand.
Jimmy Olsen.
You answer blandly. âIf this is about that goose video againââ
âRelax. Itâs not.â He speaks as if heâs chewing something. âAlthough, side note, thereâs a new edit where the goose honks to the beat of Eye of the Tiger andâanyway. Thatâs not why Iâm calling.â
âThen what, Jimmy?â You drag a hand down your face, dreading every second of the call.
âYou left your charger hereââ
âDonât even get me started on that.â
ââbut I already gave it to Clark.â
Silence. Heavy, jagged silence.
âYou what?â
âGave it to Clark. Figured he could drop it off, since he already knows where you live.â He pauses, then adds, in the worldâs most audible smirk: âWink wink.â
âYou didnât actually wink just now, did you?â
âOh, I did, physically. With both eyes.â
âJimmyââ
âYouâre welcome. He said he was heading that way anyway.â
The line clicks dead. You stare at your phone for a moment longer, and then, because thereâs nothing else to do, you stand.
You wander to the balcony, scanning the street in search of a man you know very well. Thereâs no way youâre mentally or emotionally prepared for this. Murmuring something unspeakable, you dart to the bathroom mirror. Itâs too late to fix anything. Nevertheless, you splash cold water on your face, wiping under your eyes and blinking at your reflection like thatâll make you look alive.
Three polite, measured taps on your door have you looking at the doorway with utter fear, and thatâs when you consider faking your death.
In the end, you open the door. Clarkâs wearing a big coat that makes his shoulders look broader than human decency allows, holding your charger like itâs something precious.
âHey. Delivery service. Courtesy of Jimmy Olsen.â
You draw in a long breath. âThank you. IâIâm sorry you had to do that. He really didnât need to drag you intoââ
He shakes his head before you get to say more. âItâs no trouble. I was happy to.â
You step back, thumb tapping the edge of the door. âDo you wanna come in for a minute? I mean, you donât have to. Obviously. But if you want water orâtea? Bad tea. Thatâs all Iâve got.â
He smiles, stepping inside as if he were trying not to track in mud. âWaterâs perfect. Thanks.â
You leave him in the living room while you hunt down a clean glass, and as you pour, you curse yourself for the mess of dirty dishes on the counter. Once you come back, heâs not moving. Just standing by the couch, staring. At your laptop.
âI didnât mean to meddle in your stuff,â he says gently. âBut⌠were you writing something?â
You make your way around the couch. âOh. Yeah. No. Itâs nothing.â
He sits after getting rid of his coat, seemingly not believing your words. âCan I ask what itâs about?â
Placing the glass on top of the table, you take a seat beside him, your knees folding under you, fingers worrying at the seam of your pants. âItâs kind of dumb.â
âI doubt that.â
âItâs justâsomething I started on Saturday night. I donât know. Itâs not an article, really. Not for the paper. Just⌠thoughts. About Superman. Or not him exactly. More about what he means to people.â
He says nothing. So you keep going.
âI guess Iâve been thinking about why people need something to believe in. Like a⌠structure. A symbol. Something to hang all their hope on. And for some people, thatâs Superman, even if heâs flawed. He gives people permission to believe the world isnât doomed.â
You pause. âAnd Perry would throw it in the trash if he ever came across it,â you add, bitterly. âSo. Doesnât matter.â
Clarkâs gdoesnât tear his gaze away from you. âIâd like to read it.â
You blink. âWhat?â
âIf youâre okay with it,â he says, nodding toward the laptop. âIâd really like to.â
Hesitating for a second longer, you eventually slide the laptop in his direction. He adjusts on the couch as he leans forward, careful with the device, treating it as something delicate.
âBrace yourself for excessive metaphors.â
âOh, I love metaphors. The more excessive, the better.â
And so he begins to read.
You try not to stare. At him, at the screen, at anything. You focus on the ticking of a clock you didnât even know had batteries, wondering if Clark will also think that what you wrote is too silly. Too emotional or abstract. Perhaps he'll want to know why you were writing about Superman in the first place.
Thereâs a sudden shift in his demeanor. Itâs subtle, barely anything. His shoulders drop a fraction, and when you take in the full sight of him, heâs grinning, reading all the way through.
âThis is good,â he says, still concentrated on the screen. âReally good.â
âYou donât have to say that just to be nice.â
He shakes his head once, firm. âNoâI mean it. The structureâs clean. You build your argument gradually, but it doesnât drag. Your transitions are solid. And your toneââ He glares at you now. ââitâs vulnerable without tipping into sentimentality. Thereâs conviction in it, but you donât preach. It feels like a conversation.â
Your mouth opens, but nothing comes out. âItâs not finished yet,â you manage eventually, voice tight. âI still have to go over the middle section. I think I wasnât that clear once I got into the part about collective memoryââ
âEven so. Youâre onto something. If you let me, Iâd love to help you get it in front of Perry.â
Your eyes bore into his, edging closer to where heâs located. He looks entirely sincere. A sharp pressure envelops your chest, and you want to thank him for his kindness, but what comes out instead is a hoarse: âReally?â
âReally. We could try and talk to him one of these days.â
Before you can stop yourself, you lean in and hug him.
You donât even think about itâyour body just does it, and then youâre flushed against him, arms around his neck, your face tucked against the warm fabric of his coat. He smells like paper and some brand of laundry detergent you donât recognize.
He hugs you back, and itâs not one of those loose, polite things. His arm curves around you like he means it. You close your eyes, just for a second, just long enough to remember what it feels like to be held like that.
âI keep doing this,â you utter, voice hushed by how near he is. âRandomly hugging you.â
âI donât mind it. Not at all.â
When you pull back, youâre still half in his space, breathing a little faster than usual. The relief is short-lived.
You ask for the antidote to the ache that keeps you up at night, something to quiet the want that only he seems to understand. âCan you please do it?â
âDo what?â
Does he want you to say it?
You stare at him, and something in your stomach dives. âPlease, kiss me,â you plead, your voice barely rising above the hush of breath between you, and yet it seems to echo in the small apartment. Your cheeks feel burning hot, but you donât, canât, wonât look away. Not now. Not with him so close youâre convinced your skin might start fusing with his.
That seems to shake something in him. It might be the first time youâve seen him truly stunned. His lips part slightly, eyes flicking from yours to your mouth, trying to make sense of the fact that this is real. That you want this from him.
One hand lifts reverently and settles along your jaw. The pads of his fingers cradle the hinge of it like youâre beyond fragile, afraid of pressing too hard. His thumb barely skims the corner of your mouth, and you perceive a jolt going down your spine.
His touch is featherlight, but his breathing is not. Itâs affected, perhaps as much as yours. âYou really want me to?â
You nod. Or try to. It comes out more like an eager lean into his palm, your body already answering before your mouth does. Itâs been too long since youâve been touched this way, like you mattered.
Your thighs press against his, knees brushing the outside of his, as if you were nearly straddling him. When your hands move instinctively to his chest, you see it: the first button of his shirt undone. The faint rise and fall beneath it.
You glance up, asking without words. He doesnât back away, and you press your fingertips lightly there. His pale skin feels smooth to the touch, and his heartbeat flutters beneath your fingertips, stuttering out of rhythm.
He wants this as much as you do. The human body doesnât lie. It canât. It doesnât pretend to want something it doesnât crave.
âI do,â you insist, the words catching faintly at the back of your throat, transfixed in a whirlwind of emotion. âI need you to do it.â
A shallow breath leaves him. Thereâs a thin, glowing ring of blue circling his pupils, his gaze so dark it nearly swallows the light. His other hand slides around to the nape of your neck, achingly gentle.
Clark pulls you in, and his lips meet yours.
At first, itâs a series of tender collisions, just the press and lift of mouths, as if heâs testing the shape of you against him, trying to memorize it in pieces. One kiss. Another. And another. They donât last long because they donât need to.
Itâs when you tilt your head and open your mouth to him that he gives in. Thatâs all it takes.
He deepens the kiss instantly, as if heâs been waiting for that signal all along. His mouth claims yours with an urgency that feels both new and inevitable. His lips are plush, cool with mint, probably the vague trace of chewing gum still clinging from earlier.
Your hands fist the fabric of his shirt like a lifeline, his glasses knocking into your nose once, twice. Your body shifts, and then youâre fully perched in his lap, thighs spread over his. His arms adjust around your waist, steadying you there, holding you like he canât bear the idea of you leaving. One of his hands slides to your lower back, while the other, still at your neck, traces along your jaw, then behind your ear, fingers tangled in your hair.
Sighing into him, your breath gets caught in the cavern of his mouth. The world gets smaller, somehow quieter. Just the sound of his breath mixing with yours, the thud of your pulse in your ears, the heat pooling between you like a live wire.
And even through it, he never stops being gentle. He doesnât rush it. Doesnât push too hard, though his body trembles beneath you every time he elicits a new sound out of you.
At some point, your lungs scream for oxygen, having grown unaccustomed to the sheer indulgence of kissing for several uninterrupted minutes. You pull back only enough to press your forehead to his, gasping his name. Youâre kissed raw, lit from the inside out, and the only thing anchoring you is the reassuring pressure of his arms, still wrapped around your frame.
Your lips linger over his, and when you open your eyes, you find his still closed. Neither of you speaks for a moment. His thumb traces a distracted path across your lower back.
Then:
âYou should start forgetting your charger more often,â he murmurs, voice a little raspy.
That alone has you focusing on evening out the creases of his shirt with your palm, mostly to avoid combusting. âI swear it wasnât on purpose.â His finger gently lifts your chin, coaxing you to meet his gaze. The quiet ache of tenderness in his eyes nearly does you in. âHey.â
âHey.â
The words youâve been actively trying to cage in for months fall out of your mouth without permission, but you donât regret them. âI like you.â
He gathers you tighter against his chest. âWell, I canât say Iâm not flattered,â he says, teasing, that crooked half-smile already returning. A laugh bubbles out of himâbut itâs giddy, boyish. You cut him off by covering his mouth with your palm.
âDonât make fun of me. Iâm trying to have a moment here.â
He gently peels your hand away, lacing your fingers with his instead, and brings them to rest against his chest. âIâve probably been dreaming about this since your first week at the office,â he admits.
You glance up and notice his glasses have slipped down the bridge of his nose. Carefully, you push them back up with a fingertip. âI was always looking at you, you know,â you confess, quieter now. âCouldnât help it.â
âYou talk like I didnât bring you coffee on your second day,â he teases, brushing his nose against yours. Leaning back just enough to take you in, his eyes sweep slowly across your face. âI havenât been able to stop thinking about you.â
The words melt straight into your spine, and before you can think better of it, you surge forward and kiss him again. He meets you without hesitation, and when you break away, you leave a trail of humid kisses across his cheeks, down the line of his jaw, until your mouth finds the curve of his neck.
âI think my kissing might be a little rusty,â you croak into his skin. âCould probably use some improvement.â
âYouâre kidding? It was fantastic. What are youâoh.â A beat. Then: âOh. Sure.â Heâs grinning like an idiot now, draping an arm around your waist. âI mean, I can help you with that. Practice makes perfect.â
âHow noble of you, Kent.â
Your first kiss (kisses, pluralâyou lost count around the third) marks a shift in the fabric of everything. Youâd seen it coming, even gave yourself a pep talk in the mirror that morning.
But then Clark sets a coffee on your desk, just as he always does, and says, âHope you have a really good day today,â and suddenly your pep talk is useless. Youâre smiling like someone who knows something others donât. Because you do.
Together, you find a rhythm. You donât talk about what this isâyetâbut somethingâs shifted. No overt PDA. Not even flirtation, not really. Just⌠little things. Things that no one else clocks. The way he passes you a folder with an unnecessary brush of fingers. The way he saves you a chair in meetings and pulls it subtly closer to his, so that your knees bump under the table.
Itâs the kind of thing that would be completely invisible to anyone else, but to you, itâs everything. Itâs a love letter made of glances and millimeters, what you replay at night before bed, giggling at your ceiling like a fool.
Weeks pass in a blur of late nights and whispered conversations in elevators, and work has never been this motivating. Even Perry has stopped looking at you like youâre one bad coffee spill away from being escorted out by security.
One of Clarkâs articles makes the front pageâagainâand when Jimmy sees it, he promptly rolls up the newspaper and smacks Clark in the arm with it. âAlright, headline hero. At this point, youâre just showing off.â
Clark ducks his head with a laugh, caught mid-fumble with his bag, a coffee, and what looks like three different folders sliding out from under his arm. You want to help him, but instead you just stand at your desk, watching like an idiot, warm with the kind of affection that makes your hands feel too light.
Lois arrives like sheâs been summoned by sarcasm. She chews the end of a pen and corners Clark against his desk, watching him try to stack his chaos. âYou know, Kent, I find it fascinating. You always seem to be conveniently nearby when Supermanâs handing out interviews like candy on Halloween.â
He doesnât look up, adjusting his monitor as if that could save him. âWhat can I say? Maybe Iâm his type. We havenât kissed yet, if thatâs what youâre wondering.â
She narrows her eyes. âDonât try to be clever with me. What do you give him? Why does he only let you interview him?â
âHave you considered he just⌠likes my writing?â
âSo now youâre accusing him of bad taste?â
Jimmy slides into frame, palms raised. âOkay, okay. Timeâs up, guys.â He puts both hands on Loisâs shoulders with exaggerated care. âYou, my friend, are tense. Breathe. Maybe try yoga. Or tequila.â
Blowing air through her cheeks, she finally peels away, muttering, âI just wish Superman would leave his favoritism aside.â Before heading to her desk, she gives Clark one final, mysterious look.
Jimmy drops into his own chair dramatically, putting his feet over his desk. âWell, at least I tried.â
The day presses on. When lunch rolls around, youâre still grinning. You spot Clark at his desk, half-eaten sandwich in one hand, the other scrolling through something on his monitor, glasses barely askew. You approach with your hands clasped behind your back, adopting a mock-serious tone.
âMr. Kent.â
His eyes flick up, and he swallows a bite too quickly. âOh. Hi. To what do I owe the pleasure?â
You tilt your chin toward the newspaper near his bag. âJust wanted to congratulate you on the article.â
He lowers his voice until itâs almost inaudible, cheeks going faintly pink. âThank you, baby. I would've hugged you the second I saw it, but, you knowâŚâ
âTo celebrate⌠I was thinking dinner? I could make homemade pasta.â
âGosh, Iâd love that. Your place?â
âYeah.â
âI wish I could kiss you right now,â he murmurs, gaze soft and so full of feelings it nearly unmoors you. âYou look beautiful today.â
It hits you in the ribs, the way he says it. You offer him your fist. âFist punch?â
His smile is half laughter, half reverence. He bumps your knuckles with his own, his fingers linger a beat longer than necessary.
As night folds in around your apartment, youâve been stirring the sauce for the past twenty minutes, though itâs been done for at least ten. The smell of garlic and basil lingers in the air, the wine is uncorked, and the candles you litâjust two, nothing too obviousâare dripping lazy wax trails down their sides and onto the counter.
Your phone buzzes where itâs propped upright beside the sink.
Clark: Hey, Iâm so sorry. Something came up. Can we rain check dinner? Promise Iâll make it up to you.
You just stand there, wooden spoon in hand. No call or explanation. Just the same vague apology he's given you three times now, each time with a different flavor of excuse. Each time with the same effect: you, left waiting with something you didnât mean to take so personally.
Thereâs an answer teetering on the edge of your tongue. You even type, Itâs alright! :-), with the smiley face and all, mostly to seem breezy. Effortless. But your thumb pauses, then backspaces slowly until the message disappears, and you leave him on read. Not as a form of punishment, but because you donât know what else to reply.
You try to be patient. Try to be the kind of person who shrugs things off, who doesnât take a rain check as anything more than bad timing. The problemâs that youâre not wired that way: you feel too much. You think too much.
Turns out, keeping your brain from imploding is the hardest part. Youâve even been practicing it lately, this thing of not jumping to the worst-case scenario. Telling yourself not everything is a sign, and that people get busy and have lives.
The thingâs that your brain has a voice of its own. A mean one, which sounds an awfully lot like yours.
Maybe he kissed you because he felt like he had to.
Maybe he doesnât know how to say it, but heâs changed his mind.
Maybe he never wanted something serious, and youâre the only one building stories out of crumbs.
Dragging your feet back to the living room, you sit down in the nice pair of clothes youâd chosen for the occasion, and blink at the empty coffee table. As your body sinks into the couch cushions, the fatigue of disappointment sinks deeper than any full day at the Daily Planet. The TV throws shadows on the walls, some sitcom playing to an invisible audience.
And when your eyes finally close, you let sleep take the shape of mercy.
The pasta incident, when the spaghetti went cold and your heart even colder, wasnât the last time he left you waiting.
Almost two weeks later, it plays out again.
The door clicks open an hour and a half past when he said heâd be here. You donât greet him. Instead, you remain in the kitchen, back precisely angled away from the entrance, pretending to be focused on dinner even though itâs gone cold.
Clarkâs footsteps are calculated, a careful shuffle across the living room carpet, testing the silence. He pauses just inside the kitchen's threshold. âHey, honey,â he says, a little too bright, a little too loud, his greeting threading through the stillness. âSorry Iâm late. There was something I had to take care of.â
You crane your neck slowly. His hair is damp, curling at the edges, exactly as it does after sweating. His shirt is inside out, rumpled, the collar a crumpled mess. His cheeks are flushed, a deep, uneven red, and his chest rises and falls in quick, shallow breaths, as if he sprinted the last few blocks. He looks utterly disheveled.
You donât ask where heâs been. Not yet. âYour shirt's backwards,â you retort instead, the words flat, neutral.
Startled, he bows his head, looking down and letting out a short, forced puff of air as he rubs the back of his neck. âMy bad. I didnât even notice.â His eyes, meeting yours, hold a flicker of surprise, quickly veiled.
âYeah. You seem⌠in a rush.â
He doesnât contradict you, just watches, completely tongue-tied, his posture subtly tightening. You drop your gaze back to the casserole dishâstuffed eggplants, roasted earlier in the dayâand put it back into the oven, hoping itâll survive the fifth reheat of the night.
Behind you, you feel him inch closer. A familiar warmth spreads across your back as his body presses gently against yours. His arms wrap around your waist, his hands resting lightly on your stomach, chin settling onto your shoulder while he brushes his lips against your cheek. âYouâre quiet.â
You lift your shoulder in a half-shrug. âAnd youâre late.â
His hold around you tightens, rocking both your bodies back and forth before spinning you around to face him. His eyes, filled with longing, seek yours. âI missed you.â
If only that could be enough. You wish you could live off the sound of his voice and the weight of his hands on your body, letting his presence fill all the empty spaces, though you canât help craving the one thing he wonât grant you: clarity.
Clark kisses you hungrily, a low, frustrated sound catching in his throat the moment you open to him, your tongue clashing with his. His cold hands glide up your back, slipping beneath your shirt to find bare skin, and you gasp as his fingers knead your lower back, the swift curve of your spine.
In one seamless motion, he lifts you onto the counter, and the kiss evolves into one heated and consuming, more of a desperate embrace. It's almost like heâs trying to make up for every second heâs missed, every moment of absence now erased by the force of his presence. Your fingers tangle in the damp hair at his nape, giving it a firm tug. That has him groaning against you, stepping further in between your knees, pressing flush against you.
His kisses deviate, trailing south, turning sloppy. "Itâs been two months since our first kiss," he rasps against your throat, lips dragging over your damp skin, leaving open-mouthed kisses and a trail of heat.
For a moment, you let yourself vanish into him, surrendering to the overwhelming sensation, the promise of fleeting oblivion. You swallow hard, a whine bubbling up in your chest as his hips grind into yours with rhythmic pressure.
A sharp sizzle coming from the oven cuts through the haze.
You stiffen, hands finding his chest, pushing against him, breathless. "The eggplants."
He lets out a dazed breath, his forehead still resting against your clavicles before you manage to slide off the counter. You crack open the oven just in time, a cloud of smoke puffing out.
Plating the food, you meticulously avoid his gaze. The comfortable intimacy of moments before has been shattered. âYou couldâve let me know youâd be arriving this late.â
âI told youââ
âI know,â you cut in. âSomething came up.â
He exhales, planting hands on his hips. His body remains a few feet from you, a physical barrier building. âOkay. So youâre mad.â
âIâm not mad.â
âDisappointed, then?â
âClark, itâs not even about tonight.â
âThen what is it about?â
You hesitate, picking up both your plates. Then: âWhere were you?â The silence that follows stretches too long, and he merely stands there, observing you âRight.â
âI donât want to fight.â
âIâm not fighting. Iâm just⌠tired.â
He takes a single step closer, his brow furrowed. âYou donât believe me.â
You glance at him, quietly. âShould I?â
That hits him like a slap. âI told you I liked you, that I care about you. About us. Iâve shown you that.â
âBut then you vanish,â you say in rejoinder, voice trembling. âYou show up looking like youâve just escaped a fire. You donât answer calls. You donât explain anything. Donât you think that drives me crazy?â
âIâve been telling youââ
âClark, itâs not about you saying it! Itâs about me believing it. And you donât exactly make that easy.â
âThe real problem here is that you donât trust me.â
âYou think I want to be like this? You think I like doubting people when theyâre kind to me? Well, Iâm sorry,â you snap, the words coated in sarcasm, a desperate defense. âWould you like me to book a therapy session mid-dessert?â
âMaybe you should,â he agreesâand the moment he does, his shoulders slump, a quiet wave of regret washing over his face.
Biting your tongue, you carry your plates to the table, placing them down on the wooden surface. He stays in the kitchen, breathing hard.
âIâm sorry,â he says again, softer now. âI justâ I donât know how to do this when you already assume Iâm going to leave.â
âIâm not assuming,â you say, barely a whisper, sitting down at the table. âIâm just preparing for what usually happens.â
âYouâre staring at me like Iâm about to vanish.â
You blink, wounded by his accuracy. âBecause people do. They do that.â
âIâm not people!â he exclaims, suddenly louder, cracking with what you perceive as frustration. His fists clench at his sides, knuckles white, though he remains rooted in place. "Iâm me. And Iâm standing right here, arenât I?"
âFor now. Who knows if something else will come up?â
Something cracks in him then. He exhales a sharp sound of utter defeat. His blue eyes dart around the kitchen, looking everywhere but at you, like he suddenly doesnât know where to put his hands. With a jerky motion, he turns abruptly and moves to the couch, grabbing his bag, and after a quiet clink, he places the set of keys you gave himâyour apartment keysâ on the table.
He doesn't look back at them. Or at you. âOkay,â he mutters under his breath. âOkay.â
âClarkââ you start, a desperate plea forming in your throat.
âThank you for the food,â he says, slinging the bag over his shoulder. âIâm sure itâs great.â
Then the door clicks again, and heâs gone.
The Daily Planet office, once a source of nervous excitement, now feels like the perfect stage for an excruciating play, where every creak of a chair, every muffled phone call, and every far-off laugh from the newsroom, feels amplified.
One day bleeds into the next. Two become three. Three into four. Time unspools in quiet, colorless strands, and you and Clark donât speak.
You develop a radar for him. The way his broad shoulders appear in the periphery of your vision when he walks past your desk. The clean scent that lingers for a moment too long in the air after heâs been near. The rustle of his coat, the click of his shoes.
Each tiny signal sends a fresh jolt through you, a cocktail of longing, hurt, and a futile sense of hope that he might just look at you differently.
He never does. His gaze, when it lands anywhere near your orbit, can be described as nothing more than fleeting. His profile, when you cast him a quick glance, is unreadable, stony. He still places your usual coffee beside your monitor. The one you havenât asked for. The one you donât touch.
Itâs the careful avoidance of two people who know too much about each other, and yet, not enough.
Jimmy, bless his usually boisterous heart, is the first to notice the shift. The absence of his jokes feels heavier than any of his previous teasing. He watches you some mornings when you walk inâdoes a quick, puzzled double takeâthen looks away with a frown youâre not supposed to catch.
Your new routine includes staying late at the newsroom. Not because youâre more productive, but because being alone in the office feels better than being alone in your apartment. You stare at the same document for hours while words blur and sentences unravel in front of you.
But when your mind finally stills, it drifts to the article. The one you wrote about Superman. The one Clark urged you to show Perry.
Youâd written it during a different time. A better one. It had come from a place of awe, from a belief that Superman was more than a shiny cape and strengthâthat he was what Metropolis aspired to be: a symbol of better days, of striving, of hope.
Now, hope feels like a language youâve forgotten how to speak.
Today, you donât believe in hope. You believe in a man who held you like he meant it, once, and canât meet your eyes now.
Nevertheless, you print the article, not really knowing why. Maybe because itâs the only thing in this building that still feels like it belongs to you.
Gathering the pages, you breathe in, hold it, let it out. Outside Perryâs office, you linger for a full minute before knocking.
His office is its usual chaos: tottering stacks of newspapers, coffee cups in varying states of decay, and the smell of old cigar smoke clinging to the walls like wallpaper.
âWell, donât just stand there,â he grunts. âWhatâve you got?â
You step inside slowly, article in hand, your grip faltering slightly as you set it down on his desk. âI know this isnât what I was assigned, but Iâve been⌠working on something for the past weeks.â
He squints at you. âYou been using our electricity for your side projects?â
âNo! IâI wrote it at home. I swear.â
He huffs, puts on his reading glasses, and begins scanning the first page. You try not to stare at him, but itâs impossible. Your eyes cling to every twitch in his jaw, every slight narrowing of his eyes.
His face gives away nothing, and you brace for the worst. That itâs too sentimental. Too soft. Too young.
Finally, he leans back, lifting his chin and pinning you with a piercing look. âDo you like it?â
You blink owlishly. âWhy are you asking me?â
âBecause I want to know.â
âItâs not up to me,â you deflect. âYouâre the one who decides if it runs.â
âI know that. But you wouldnât bring me something you didnât believe in. So Iâll ask again: are you proud of it? Do you think it belongs in the columns of this paper?â
For a moment, your throat closes up. You hadnât realized how deeply youâd buried your own opinion. Youâd been so focused on disappearing, on not making noise, not taking up spaceâespecially this weekâthat you forgot to consider what you thought of your own work.
Perryâs looking at you like heâs not going to breathe until you answer.
So you speak, nodding in agreement, and right after adding, âI believe people will find it comforting.â
âThen you know what comes next.â
Your confidence may not be at its best, neither is your hope, but this is enough. At least to keep writing, to walk back to your desk.
Itâs enough to make it to tomorrow.
Sleep wonât come.
Youâve tried everything: writing until your hand cramped, scrolling endlessly, even lying on the floor like a starfish, begging the ceiling to knock you out. Meditation felt like self-punishment tonight. Silence only made the memories louder.
So you call him. Once, twice, but youâre met with nothing else than his voicemail. You donât leave a message. What would you even say? Hi, I know you said you cared about me and then walked out of my apartment looking like you were breaking from the inside out, but I miss you and I canât breathe right now, and can you please justâ
You decide to hang up, tossing your phone onto the couch and flicking on the television. Static. Infomercials. Cartoons. Some old film from the 1940s.
And thenâLois Laneâs voice. The screen flickers to life, showing a live, chaotic feed. A shaky handheld shot from a rooftop shows a scene near Metropolis General Hospital. A glowing creature, a blur of silver and blue and fury, throws what looks like an empty city bus like itâs paper. A streetlamp explodes and sirens scream in the distance.
It all makes you wonder where Superman is.
Heâs not flying in for a rescue, not beaming reassuring smiles, not waving at kids from the sky. Heâs in the dirt, bloodied at the temple, gritting his teeth as he lifts a half-crushed ambulance off the street.
You sit up straight, your heart climbing to your throat.
Loisâs voice crackles through the footage: ââbeen a difficult few weeks for Metropolisâs hero. Fans online have pointed out the change in his demeanor: less smiling, more⌠focused. Almost withdrawn. Weâve reached out to the authoritiesââ
Itâs physically impossible for you to hear the rest because youâre entranced watching him. Heâs moving like someone who hasnât slept in days. Fighting like he doesnât care if he gets hurt.
You canât look away.
The camera pans wildly as Superman lunges forward, slamming his shoulder into the creatureâs ribs with a sound that resembles crumbling concrete. Thereâs a fresh gash across his cheekbone, his hair disheveled, not in the windswept, magazine-cover kind of way, but genuinely messy: flattened in places, curling in others, soaked with sweat.
For the first time, youâre not watching Superman. Youâre watching someone else. Someone who looks likeâ
No. No, that would be insane. The idea is so preposterous, your mind rejects it, but the seed of recognition has been planted. It can't be. Not him.
Once again, Loisâs voice cuts through the footage, her tone sharper now, edged with that reporterâs concern she usually hides under cool professionalism.
âSuperman was spotted fighting alone for nearly half an hour before backup arrived. And while officials say the Justice Gang is expected to contain the situation soon, many are asking the same question: what happens when Superman is no longer invincible? What happens when he burns out?â
Staring at the screen, you contemplate his eyes flickering up for a secondâjust a secondâlike heâs heard something above the noise. And theyâre blue. The exact kind of blue thatâs filled your mornings for the last three months.
Your breath stutters. The camera angle shifts. This time, it shows his jaw flexing as he takes another hit, wiping the blood from his lip with the back of his hand.
Youâve seen that gesture. Too many times. âNo,â you whisper out loud. âNo, thatâs not possible.â
Youâre already moving, with your heart in your mouth. You donât even know what youâre reaching for at first, until your hand brushes something at the back of the drawer beneath your TV. Itâs a pair of old prescription glasses you never quite got used to, the ones you always said gave you headaches.
Holding them up, you hover them in front of the TV, and your world rearranges itself.
There he is.
Clark.
Clark, with that same square jaw, that same tilt of his mouth when heâs gritting through something.
Clark, who stammers when heâs nervous, who brings you coffee even when you wonât drink it.
Clark, whose shoulders you could rest your whole weight onânot only because heâs strong, but because heâs been carrying the sky for so long and somehow still made room for you.
Clark, who sat next to you on the stairwell that day when you felt like quitting.
Clark, whose kindness never felt performative, who looked at you like you were worth listening to even when you were barely making sense.
Clark, who vanishes into smoke and ash and headlines. Who leaves through the fire escape and returns hours later. Who smiled at you across the office like it meant something, and maybe it did, maybe it always didâbut now you know the cost of that smile.
If you lower the glasses, heâs Superman again.
If you lift them⌠itâs the Clark you know.
Theyâre the same man. Two halves of a single truth.
âOh my God,â you whisper again, this time not out of disbelief, but something much deeper. Something hollow and shattering.
Loisâs voice keeps going, but itâs background noise now, a murmur beneath the ringing in your ears.
You sit back on the couch, eyes locked on the screen, heart thudding like a trapped bird. Every memory starts to rearrange itself, clicking into a terrifying, undeniable pattern. His sudden disappearances. The uncanny way he knew you werenât hurt that night at the bar. The tension in his voice each time he apologized for being late. The way heâd always kiss you like it was the last time heâd ever get to.
The truth has slipped through a crack you never saw until now, and thereâs no unseeing it. He was lying to you, but not in a cruel way. He was just trying to protect you.
The monster finally goes down in a shuddering collapse of concrete and bone. The camera shakes violently, jolting as dust swallows the scene, and then steadies just in time to catch Supermanâor Clarkâlanding hard on one knee.
Green Lantern, Mr Terrific and Hawkgirl all converge around him, bruised and dust-streaked, checking in on each other. But your eyes wonât leave his face. Thereâs a scratch across his brow along with many others. His mouth twitches into a faint smile as the crowd outside the hospital begins to clap, nodding at them. He doesnât need to say anything, at least not right now.
For one suspended second, his gaze falls directly into the camera lens, and itâs not the kind of look meant for press or headlines or statues carved in his honor. Itâs private, and heavy, and it feels like heâs looking straight into your apartment, straight through the screen.
Straight through you.
Loisâs voice snaps back into focus: âMetropolis, you can rest easy tonight. For now, Superman and the Justice League have subdued the threat.â
You press a hand to your mouth, the glow from the television casting his silhouette across your walls, larger than life, yet so impossibly familiar now it almost hurts to look.
He steps away from the others. Sirens flash red against his suit, casting ripples of color through the smoke. A few children break from the crowd, darting past yellow caution tape, their small arms wrapping around his legs in awe-struck gratitude. He kneels momentarily, accepting their hugs with the kind of gentleness that breaks you open.
You canât hear what he says to them, but it softens their faces. One of them gives him a flower. Another just holds his hand.
Then, without fanfare, he lifts off the ground, launching himself into the sky. The wind kicks up rubble, camera crews duck, the picture shakes, and he vanishes into the sky like he was never really there.
Gone.
You stare at the empty space he left behind on the screen, breath snagged in your lungs.
âWhere are you going?â you mumble, reaching for the screen. âWhere are youââ
The muted clatter of ceramic on concrete interrupts your rambling.
Slowly, you turn your head to your balcony, afraid of what youâll find. Out past your window, a potted lavender plant lies cracked and wilting. Clarkâs standing there, just outside the glass. âIâm sorry,â he says, voice muffled, wincing is he gestures to the shattered pot at his feet. âI didnât calculate the landing right.â
Rooted to the floor, as if your feet have been sealed to the carpet, you stare at him through the glass as if heâs a hologram. A turbulent mixture of strange feelings clashes inside you, and you fight them back, stepping to the side as you open the window. His boots scuff against the floorboards, dragging slightly as he steps inside
At first, he canât seem to bring himself to look at you directly. He paces around the living room, running his hands through his hair, sighing like someone whoâs rehearsed this moment a thousand times and still doesnât know where to begin.
âClarkââ
âThis is why I disappear all the time,â he blurts, abruptly stopping in front of the television. âWhy I cancel our plans. Why I show up late, or leave before Iâm supposed to, or text you lame excuses like âSorry, got held upâ when Iâm halfway across the planet.â
Itâs hard to make the connection. The leap between the man who fumbles with his tie and tells bad puns over takeout, and the mythological figure on screen who bends steel and outruns storms, whose every move seems broadcast across the globe.
Theyâre two versions of a whole you never imagined could overlap. And yet⌠it makes sense, somehow. Of course Clark would be Superman. A man so genuine, so generous, who expects for nothing and finds the way to see beauty in rusted scraps and broken thingsâwho better to carry the weight of hope?
âI shouldâve told you sooner. God, I meant to. I wanted to, I swear. I was going to, that night after I read your article. You were sitting there, talking about Superman like he was some kind of miracle and I justââ He breaks off, shaking his head. âIt got too easy to pretend I could have both. Be with you. Protect you. Keep it all going without having to risk what we had.â
Interrupting him now would feel like an act of pure cruelty. You see the disoriented anguish in his gaze, the way his fists clench and unclench with each passing second, how desperately he seems to need to unburden himself.
You wonder what wouldâve happened if, instead of crashing onto your balcony and shattering a pot in the process, he had simply returned to his own apartment. Would the love you hold for him feel so present in any other scenario?
âI know this is a lot to process, but I came to understand something about you.â His voice holds such certainty it frightens you, because lately it feels like everyone else can decipher whatâs happening to you except for yourself. âYou think youâre just this temporary thing, because you donât see yourself the way I do. Thatâs why youâre always bracing for things to fall apart.â
You want to explain yourself, to give a reason for your not-at-all-desirable behavior, but you realize you canât in this moment. Not when honesty radiates from him like heat.
In the blink of an eye, heâs holding your hands in his, his grip gentle yet firm, and he brings them to his lips to press a short, tender kiss to the back of them.
âI canât seem to make sense of it. Iâve tried. But itâs been impossible for me to find a single reason why you should believe that about yourself.â You brush a tentative finger along his injured cheekbone, stopping just before you swipe dried blood, though he still offers a soft smile. His gaze is so profoundly tender you wonder if this is the first time you're truly contemplating the depth behind them. âIâm in love with you. And if I could show you your reflection through my eyes for one day, youâd understand why youâre the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing before I fall asleep.â
You never thought this type of experience could be granted to you. The belief that such moments were reserved for certain people feels now demystified. Perhaps no other moment in your life couldâve prepared you for this.
Of all the unrealistic scenarios you'd concocted over the years, mostly in your adolescence, when fantasies of a pure and overwhelming love did nothing but numb you, you never wouldâve imagined someone would love you in this way, declaring their love for you so sincerely.
The need to get rid of the blood on his face gnaws at you, and you find yourself gently tugging him towards the kitchen, neither of you saying a word. You search for a clean dishcloth in some forgotten drawer, holding it under the faucet for a few seconds. Once itâs dampened, you press it softly against the bruised areas on his lip and cheek.
He tries not to move, placing both hands flat on the counter behind you, caging you with his whole frame. This scene reminds you of the last time you were both here, the day that marked two months of seeing each other.
A day to forget, actually, because it devolved into a complete disaster.
âI got used to living with this voice in my head that sabotages me. I donât know when it started. Part of me thinks itâs always been there. Sometimes itâs quieter. Other times, itâs so loud I canât think straight. But Iâve never been able to shut it up completely.â
You take a shaky breath, putting down the cloth once itâs no longer useful. Clark doesnât pull away, nor does he move closer. He remains right where he is, poised, his entire being waiting for what youâll say next.
âI never feel like I deserve the good stuff that happens to me. I wish I did. God, I do. Perry even said heâs publishing the article I wrote and I still have to convince myself heâs not just doing it out of pityââ
His eyebrows lift, and he canât help but cut you off. Waitâreally? Heâs publishing it?â A broad, genuine smile blooms on his face, almost illuminating the dimness of your apartment. âThatâs amazing!â
âThank you. I was planning on telling you, butâyou know.â Your gaze drifts to the symbol on his suit, and you trace it with a tentative finger, the synthetic material feeling utterly strange under your touch. âThe thing is I overthink everything. Always have. And I donât know if youâll think Iâm crazy or exhausting or whatever, but I canât control it. I wish I could. So every time you went away, when you started canceling plans or looking at me like you were somewhere else entirely, I got scared.â
So this is what it feels like to truly open your heart to another soul.
âI thought that voice was right, and that you were pulling away because you regretted it because youâd realized I wasnât worth the trouble. And maybe you just didnât know how to tell me, since we work together, and we share the same friends. Plus, things between us have beenââ Once again, your words tangle, and you internally blame the raw emotionality of the moment. âI canât get away from myself, Clark. But other people? They can walk away. And I thought thatâs what you were doing.
Thereâs a pause, and his advice seems to be: âDonât trust your brain.â
âWhat do you meanââ
âDonât believe everything it tells you. I mean it. If you need me to tell you I love you, I will. If you need me to tell you how beautiful and sweet you are, Iâll do that too, and happily. Because I want to help you. Itâs not like I can spare you from those thoughtsâbelieve me, I wouldâve if there were a way. The least I can do is make you realize that voice in your head isnât always right.â
Some things cannot be put into words, and you simply have to act in their name. You kiss him, your arms finding their way around his neck, pulling him as close as possible as you smile against his lips, trying not to generate any pressure where heâs hurt as you say, âShit, I love you so much.â
Itâs incredible how one can transition from immense sadness to something that must closely resemble the deepest tranquility ever known to humankind. He holds your face between his hands, his thumbs caressing your cheeks with such fondness it could make you sick. You donât know how someone can look so happy and so overwhelmed at once. âSay that again.â
âI love you.â
âAgain. Please.â
You kiss him between each word, letting them stretch longer and deeper until your mouths canât bear to part. âI. Love. You.â
He tilts your face toward his, his hand cradling the back of your head as if heâs afraid youâll float away. âPlease tell me your brainâs not saying anything right now.â
âItâs been surprisingly quiet.â
âThen letâs keep it that way.â
You make a strangled noise as the kiss turns fierce, not knowing exactly where to put your hands. Thereâs so much you want to do, so much of him you want to touch and skin to trace with your fingers. That simmering desire had grown between you both, never quite breaking through the surface. Not because you didnât one want it, but because you'd asked him to hold back.
Remember that tiny voice in your brain? The mean one? That one had told you several times that you had to wait a certain amount of time before sleeping with him. Because if you didnât, if you got too close too soon, he might realize he wasnât into you. Physically speaking. And you had done just that: waited.
But now, all patience shatters. Thereâs no room for cautious stretching of things anymore, not when the man you love, the one youâve been pining for months, stands before you
He doesnât get the hint when you kiss back or when your teeth nip at the skin of his throat, not until you take his hands, which are resting politely on your lower back, and push them lower, guiding them up to cup your ass through the layers of clothing.
You hear the way he breathes out, a grunt caught somewhere between surprise and shock, as you shift even closer and speak softly over his lips. âI want to do it. Tonight.â
âAre you sure? Because we could totallyââ
âClark, stop being such a gentleman.â You tug him toward the couch and fall back onto it, kicking your shoes off without grace or ceremony, your heart gallops with anticipation as you stretch out, swallowing hard.âIâd like you to touch me, then Iâd like to return the favor, and then I want you to fuck me. In that specific order,â you admit. So as not to lose the habit, you whisper the word that never fails to soften his expression: âPlease.â
You notice the impressive bulge straining at the front of his suit, and he nods his head in earnest, one of his large hands pushing your thighs open. âYeah. I can do that.â
Electricity now runs through your veins, each part of you igniting under his hands as he touches you. He doesnât rush. Doesnât rip your clothes off or fall into clichĂŠ. He wants to take his time with you, grazing the soft curve where your neck meets your shoulder. As his hair slips through your fingers like silk, you clutch at him, sighing into his touch. Your eyes flutter open to ask him: âDoes the suit stay on?â
âWell, that depends,â he replies, lifting his head and meeting your wanting gaze. âDoes itâturn you on?â
A low fire spirals in the pit of your stomach, your chest heaving with a shaky inhale. âItâs certainly doing the job.â
âSo first you write about Superman like a professional journalistâŚâ he trails off, his palm smoothing his palm over your stomach to undo the button of your jeans with ease, lowering the zipper of your jeans millimeter by millimeter, â... and now you get wet for him?â
Wiggling your hips to help him peel off your pants more easily, you gape at the ceiling momentarily. âIâm sorry. Do my inappropriate thoughts bother him?â
âI actually believe heâd very pleased, to be fair,â he murmurs, settling on the couch beside you. His hand returns, slower this time, tracing over the cotton that clings to your heat. âYou see, heâs a simple man. Safe to say heâd really like you.â
Clark teases his thumb to your clit through the cotton and your back arches from the couch. âClark, Iââ
âIâll go slow.â He presses his lips against yours briefly, running the length of his nose along yours, your skin buzzing where it brushes his. âDo you trust me?â You nod, unable to speak, struggling to keep your eyes open. He presses against you again, this time with purpose. Slow, deliberate circles over your clit, his free hand curling around your waist to keep you steady as you writhe beneath him, holding you down to the earth. âThen relax. Iâve got you.â
You werenât a virgin, but heâs making you feel like one. Or maybe something even more tender than that, like youâre being touched properly for the first time in your life. Every graze of his fingers sends heat crawling under your skin, his ministrations alone having you whimpering into his neck, tugging at his hair.
âTake them off,â you beg, your hips bucking up to meet him, chasing his hand every time he attempts to pull away, needing more. Itâs more of an instinct at this point.
He doesnât make you ask twice, your underwear being gone in a flash and ending up dangling from one foot. He parts your folds, and you see his eyes darken with unfiltered awe, staring for a beat longer than expected. âJesus,â he mutters, almost to himself. âYouâre gorgeous
Clark spreads your slick across your swollen flesh, his long fingers reverent in their exploration, never faltering. When he circles your clit again, raw and bare now, you jolt, the pleasure pulsing bright and fast, like youâre going to blow up at any given moment.
He seems to enjoy watching you squirm, listening to the whimpers torn from your throat. âYouâve got no idea how hot you look right now,â he pants beside your ear, voice ragged and affected by the noises he keeps pulling out of you. His own hips grind lazily against your thigh, the pressure of his cock unmistakable, rock hard behind the fabric. âI want to see you come.â
âJustâkeep doing whatever youâre doing,â you gasp, clinging to his arm and biting back a moan when he kisses you languidly. A new wave of warmth runs under your skin, and you swear you can feel your blood rushing south. âClark, Iâmâdonât you dare stop.â
Your words spur him on, and he tightens the circles, faster now, his other hand closing around your inner thigh for leverage. That ache in your belly sharpens to a desperate pressure, and your whole body looms into him as if drawn to gravity itself.
âOh my GodâClarkââ You grip his shoulder, nails scrapping against the harsh material of his suit. Itâs too much and not enough, and every time he flicks just right, youâre launched impossibly higher. Youâre a panting mess, legs starting to tremble as pleasure coils tight in your gut.
âCome on, youâre almost there,â he encourages you, kissing your sweaty forehead. âYouâre doing so good. Let go, baby.â
You break. It starts at your core, deep and volcanic, spreading like a spark catching on dry leaves. Your thighs clamp around his hand, head thrown back as the orgasm ripples through you, crying out his name with a sound borderline raw and unrestrained. He doesn't stop until your hips stop jerking and your back settles against the couch again, twitching with aftershocks.
Youâre left gasping, eyes blurry, vision haloed in white. âIââ you try to speak, but your voice fails, coming out broken. Instead, you let out a sigh. âJesus.â
He presses a kiss to your shoulder, then slowly works his way up to your mouth. âI came as well. Mentally.â
A disbelieving laugh bubbles out of you, and you swat at his face, covering your eyes with your forearm. Youâre about to sit until you feel his breath ghost across your belly, shoving your shirt further up. You rake your hand through his fringe, brushing it back, hissing when his lips graze the patch of skin just above your clit. âAre youââ
âItâd be stupid not to take the opportunity.â He finds your legs and places them over his shoulders, effortlessly dragging your body to the edge of the couch, kneeling by the carpet and between your thighs, his large hands framing your hips.
Clark licks a broad stripe up your folds, collecting your arousal on his tongue, and you cry out, shoulders slumping forward from the overstimulation, still sensitive from your first orgasm. Yet he peers up at you with feigned innocence, kneading the flesh of your thighs. âI can stop if you want me to,â he says, a husky edge to his usual tone.
âDonât want you to,â you purr, guiding his mouth to where you need him the most. âMake me feel good.â
Devotedly, devastatingly even, he takes your words to heart, lapping at your clit with careful, coaxing pressure, sometimes flicking with the pointed tip of his tongue, sometimes flattening it to trace languid strokes. He groans at the taste of you, sinking a finger into your heat and making you clench instinctively around the intrusion.
âItâs tight in here,â he ponders aloud, not sparing you a single glance, much more preoccupied with the way youâre squeezing him. âWeâll have to see if Iâll fit.â
You mean to laugh, but it comes out as more of a sob the moment he adds another finger to the equation, and you can hear every single squelching sound your cunt makes in response to his movements.
âGod, it feelsââ Your voice cracks as his lips seal over your clit again, drawing firm circles around it, the pacing of his digits inside you forcing you to alternate your attention. âSo good, Clark. Youâre being so good to me.â
Itâs not that youâre just saying these things out of pocket. Youâve noticed he likes it, likes being praised. Not only in this context, where he has his head buried between your legs, but it usually happened whenever he did something right, and you would be there, praising him, telling him heâd done a great job.
His pupils would dilate a little, and heâd always shut you up with a kiss, but he canât right now. He seems to be destined to hear and acknowledge your words, nearly rutting into the edge of the couch the more you say. His desperation sets something alight in you, and it only makes you want to explore that side of him even more.
âIf you make me come again, Iâll suck your cock,â you mumble, dragging your nails lightly along his scalp. You donât miss how his shoulders stiffen through the suit, and he pushes his face deeper into your core. âI canât wait to have you in my mouth,â you add, smiling through the haze.
âWhatâs got you this chatty, huh?â He pumps his fingers deeper, faster, a relentless rhythm designed to shatter your composure. His teeth scrape along the inside of your right thigh, seemingly enjoying the noise that reverberates in your chest as he bites gently on it. âYou have Superman right here with you and all you do is talk.â
Three of Clarkâs fingers stretch you out and you canât no longer think straight. Neither can you breathe, having utterly forgotten how consonants and vowels combine to form words.
This, it seems, is precisely what he intended: to have you reduced to a writhing, desperate mess that canât stop mewling his name over and over. The questions, the teasing, all of it is obliterated by the rising tide of pure sensation as your world narrows to his touch and everything it means.
When you tell him youâre close, the ache coiling tight in your belly for the second time in the night, every nerve in your body lights up. Heâs a man on a quest, who whimpers in unison with you the more your breath staggers.
He asks you to come on his tongue, because he wants to know exactly what it tastes like. Because he simply must. Heâs been fantasizing about this, he confesses, about touching himself thinking of you, about how soft your skin looked in your work clothes, aboutâ
Your orgasm tears through you, fast and overwhelming, and you cling to his shoulders, riding out the tremors. His fingers remain deep inside you, and he curves them to hit that sweet spot one last time before you tell him itâs too much. His hair is mussed where your fingers yanked it, his chin glistening with your essence, and you tug him closer to kiss him, tasting yourself in the aftermath.
Somehow, without even breaking the kiss, he manages to peel the suit from his body, letting it fall in a heap beside your shoes on the floor. All thatâs left is the snug fabric of his underwear, and the sight of him nearly steals the breath from your lungs.
You trail a hand down his abdomen, fingertips brushing along the faint trail of hair beneath his navel until they meet the solid outline of his cock. You palm him softly through the fabric, feeling the twitch of need under your touch.
Now that heâs bare before you, no more slouchy coats hiding him away, you take in the rest of him. The defined lines of his chest, the softness at his waist, the tension coiled in his thighs. It takes everything in you not to outright stare, not to drool, although your mouth waters anyway.
By the time heâs lying back on the couch, youâve taken his place, kneeling between his legs. He laces his fingers behind his head, muscles taut like heâs trying to anchor himself there, to stop his hips from jerking up on instinct.
You start slow, teasing. Your fingers wrap around his shaft, stroking him lazily as your lips press hot kisses to the tip. You circle your tongue around it, dipping into the slit just to hear what kind of sound you can pull from him.
He exhales like heâs in pain. Beautiful, tortured pain. You hesitate for a split second, uncertainâwas that too much?
âDo it again,â he breathes, voice wrecked, his chest rising in uneven pulls of air. âPlease⌠thatâJesus, that feels really good.â
And you want to please him. You want to give him everything, so you do it again.
The head disappears past your lips. He groans as you sink down a few inches, his hips tensing immediately, and you hum in satisfaction at the sharp hiss he lets slip. You take more of him, then a little bit more, until youâre jerking the rest of him off with your hand, saliva slicking your chin, your throat fluttering and eyes stinging every time he brushes the back of it.
Swallowing around him, your nails scratch the line of dark hair that leads below his navel. Thereâs nothing delicate about this. Not right now, not when heâs chanting your name like a prayer, not when youâre dizzy from the taste of him. His breathy moans echo in your ears, more intoxicating than anything else youâve ever heard.
At some point, you glance up, and the eye contact nearly undoes you. Clark looks ruined, entirely entranced. His brow is furrowed tight, a deep crease between his eyes that mightâve read as frustration if you didnât know better.
To some stranger, he might even appear to be angry. His jaw is clenched, lips parted as if heâs struggling to form coherent thoughts. His hips tremble under your palms, twitching like every nerve in his body is firing at once. Heâs holding himself still with impossible effort, his thighs taut, hands clawed into the couch cushions to stop from thrusting up into your mouth.
âPerhapsââ His voice is hoarse, and he swallows hard. âPerhaps we should stop.â
You slow your pace but donât let go.
âI donât want to finish yet,â he groans, neck strained, his composure cracking under the tension. âNot this fast. I want to last. I wantââ He cuts himself off with a hiss when you press a wet kiss to the flushed head again, pulling back the foreskin. âGod, I just want more time with you like this.
You keep your hand wrapped around him, dragging your palm slow and tight from base to tip, letting your thumb swirl over the sensitive slit. His hips twitch again, betraying how close he really is.
âBut canât Superman come twice?â you ask, tilting your head to the side. He blinks, dazed, not fully registering the meaning of your words at first. You give him another firm stroke and watch his brows knit in pleasure. âItâs been a hard day.â
âBaby, I swearââ
âDidnât you save an entire hospital tonight?â you whisper, leaning in to mouth at his hipbone. âKept it from collapsing?â
âYeah,â he grunts. âYeah, Iâyes.â
âThen you deserve it.â
âBut twice?â
âYou heard it right. Once in my mouth, just like this, and then again inside me.â
Clark makes a sound thatâs somewhere between a gasp and a whimper. His arms collapse from behind his head, hands flying to his face, shielding himself from how hard words just hit him.
âOh my God,â he mumbles, palms pressed to his eyes. âYou canât say things like that.â
âWhy not?â you inquire, jerking him a little faster now. âYouâre blushing.â
âIâm notââ he lies, breath catching when your lips part around his cock once again, still not getting used to the feeling. âI justâIâm so close.â
One of his hands finds your hair, smoothing it back from your face with a gentleness that makes your heart ache. He cups the back of your head as if heâs holding something sacred, brushing his thumb along your temple as his other hand clenches the couch cushion.
âYouâre unreal,â he murmurs, eyes locked on your movements, still stroking your hair. âYou donâtâyou donât even know what you do to me. Youâre gonna be the death of me.â
Your hand tightens around his base just a little, urging him closer to the edge. He grits his teeth, unable to hold on any longer.
âIâm sorryâbe careful, Iâm gonnaââ
He empties his load into your mouth, hips stuttering in jerky thrusts. His entire body tenses beneath you, trembling as the pleasure crashes through him, head tipped back against the couch. Clark comes for what feels like ages, pulse after pulse of heavy release filling your mouth, and you take it all, letting the salty taste land on your tongue and flood your senses.
Shortly after, everything moves in a blur. Clark insists that the couch isnât ideal for whatâs about to happen. Something about angles, support, long-term consequences for your spine. You, naturally, insist youâre perfectly fine where you are.
In the end, the one with super strength settles the debate. Which is to say: he wins. He lifts you effortlessly into his arms and carries you to the bedroom like itâs the most obvious solution. The couch had been fine. Serviceable, even, but it was time for an upgrade.
Now, sprawled across your bed, you kiss beneath the warm press of blankets. Pre-cum smears over your stomach, leaking from him in needy dribbles as he hovers above you, holding his weight on his forearms, cradling your face between his hands.
His voice is low. âJust to be clear. Weâre not using aâŚ?â
âCondom?â
He nods, cheeks flushed. âYeah.â
âI told you you could come inside me.â
That stuns him into silence. âAre you sure? Want me toâgo buy some?â he manages, faltering a little.
âSome?â you echo, amused. Your gaze dips down his body, landing on the leaking head of his cock, his hips twitching as if straining to stay still. âIâm on birth control,â you murmur.
He blinks, his Adamâs apple bobbing. You can almost hear the gears in his head grinding, trying to decide whether or not youâre serious.
âI mean it. It wasnât for sexual purposes in the beginning. Iâve been on the pill for years. But if it makes you uncomfortableââ
âWhat exactly makes you think I donât want this?â
âSay that to your face. Youâre looking at me like I just proposed a blood pact.â
Huffing a breath, he pulls back enough to meet your eyes. âSo⌠weâre doing it. Like this.â
âYes.â
âBare.â
âWould you like to see my birth certificate?â
He lets out a strangled laugh, one hand sliding down to part you gently. His fingers glide through your folds, collecting your slick to lube himself up. Just as heâs about to wretch your entrance, he pauses, brows drawn tight. âReady?â
âIâve been ready since we left the couch.â
âYou canât be joking when Iâm this close to being inside you.â
âClark,â you plead, lifting your hips. âPlease, justââ
He pushes in.
At first, itâs just the tip. The stretch is instant, unavoidable, and you throw your head back, nearly knocking into the headboard.
âEasy,â he grits out. âBe careful.â His thighs tremble where they cage you in, and he slides in another inch, groaning through clenched teeth.
âTh-thatâsâfuckââ Your mouth hangs agape briefly before you shut it again. You canât even think, eyes landing on where your bodies meet, and his whole frame looks huge on top of you, the sight alone making you whimper. âClark, pleaseââ
âWait.â He stills, tearing his gaze away from you, squeezing his eyes shut. âI need a second.â
âWant me to kiss you?â
He lifts his head slightly. âAre you the devil?â
You bite your lip, fingers digging into the muscles of his lower back. âWhat are you doing? Counting?â
âTo a million.â He buries his face in your neck, forehead damp against your skin, feeding the rest of himself into you in shallow thrusts, and the final stretch burns as he bottoms out. âYouâre impossible sometimes,â he growls against your skin, groaning as you clench around him. âJesus, youâre still so tight. I donât evenâI donât know how to move.â
A desperate sound slips from your lips when his mouth brushes behind your ear. His hand strokes up your thigh, bending you slightly beneath him, folding you open. âYouâre so big.â
His arm trembles beside your head. A bead of sweat trails down his temple as you comb your fingers into his hair. âDonât say that,â he pants.
âWhy not?â
âBecauseââ he pulls back, just the head left inside, ââyouâre playing with fire.â And then he slams his hips forward, hard, drawing a strangled cry from your throat. âI usually like how you always have something to say, but right now? I just want to fuck you. If thatâs okay with you.â
Itâs official: your long, unplanned celibacy ends here. Courtesy of Superman himself.
As if heâs learning you by heart, each thrust is measured and unhurried, his hips rolling into yours with a careful intent and setting their own tempo, savoring the way your bodies fit, the subtle give and take of your curves.
Your breath hitches when he finds it: that angle, that precise, exquisite spot inside you, and your legs instinctively tighten around his waist in response. A groan slips from him when your walls flutter around him in gratitude.
He starts to unravel. His body writhes against yours with an instinct he hadnât dared show before now, his muscles working as he moves deeper, hungrier, shedding the last vestiges of his gentle restraint. You press your chest to his, fingers splayed across the flex of his back, memorizing the slope of his spine, the tremble in his arms as he struggles to hold himself back. Every sound he makes, every choked whimper, every whine he later tries to mask, you trap in your memory like precious treasure.
The moment he buries himself to the hilt, you swear youâre going to snap in half. The fullness is dizzying, and you cry out his name in a quiet plea. His lips graze your cheek, his hand smoothing your hair as he whispers something you canât quite catch, lost in the roar of blood in your ears.
Itâs not rushed at all. Heâs learning you second by second, mapping your responses, and each time he shifts the angle or tilts your pelvis just so, it steals another moan from you. He knows now. Where to press, where to grind, where to thrust until your feet curl and your throat aches from trying to hold in the sounds.
âClark,â you mewl, voice torn and trembling. A strand of his hair, dark and damp, sticks to the shell of your ear. He shifts to kiss you there and then stills, forehead resting against yours.
âI thought Iâd lost you,â he chokes out, the words raw and fragile in comparison to your heated skin.
The confession pierces you with more precision than anything else tonight. Your body is still pulsing around him, hips still twitching and asking for more, but your heart stutters, aching with sudden clarity.
You donât know if he means that night you stopped talking, the agonizing silence between you. If he means the days you went quiet and he watched from afar. You cradle his face in both hands, your thumbs tracing the sharp lines of his cheekbones, forcing him to peer down at you. His pupils are blown, his mouth swollen from all the kissing, and you feel a pang in your chest because heâs never looked so vulnerably human.
âYou didnât. Iâm right here. Iâm not going anywhere.â
His throat bobs, and pushes in again, quivering, a silent affirmation of your words.
Itâs like something breaks open inside him. The last of his control gives way.
His thrusts get rougher, more insistent, his mouth finding yours mid-moan, and you kiss him through the frantic rhythm, through the way his hand slides between your sticky bodies to circle your clit, hoping to make you fall apart. He needs thisâneeds you to come around him, to feel you clench and call his name and prove to him youâre his. That you chose him. That youâre still here. That you're real.
Youâre close. So close that the precipice looms. âDonât stop,â you gasp, clawing at his shoulders, needing something to hold onto.
âI wonât. I wonâtââ His groan catches in his throat, escaping as a raw whisper. âYou feel so good. Youâre perfect. Canât believe youâre letting me do this to you.â
The pressure builds so fast it becomes borderline unbearable. Heat coils in your belly, every muscle taut as a bowstring, straining toward release.
âIâClarkâIââ Your body arches, back lifting off the bed.
âCome on,â he begs, short of breath, his hips grinding relentlessly. âCome for me. I want to feel you.â
And when it hits, it crashes. Your orgasm blindsides you, flashing behind your eyelids, and your mouth falls open in a silent scream, body trembling violently under him as incandescent pleasure tears through you like a searing current. Your walls spasm around him, squeezing, and he cries out a primal sound of absolute abandon before surging forward with a final thrust and spurting his release inside you.
Itâs messy. Itâs beautiful and overwhelming and glorious.
He collapses, half on top of you, still deeply buried, his body spamming in unison with yours. Youâre both left shaking and sweating, but in the most magnificent way.
Clark plants a series of tender kisses to the valley between your breasts, the soft underside of your jaw, the corner of your mouth. âI didnât know it could feel like this,â he murmurs, awe coloring every syllable.
You press your nose to his hairline, drawing in the scent of him. âMe neither,â you reply, contentment curling in your chest.
He simply stays there, wrapped around you, his weight a comforting anchor. The moment stretches and neither of you dares speak too loud for a while. Itâs the kind of silence that means everything.
Eventually, he lifts his head just enough to meet your gaze. His lashes are damp, a quiet sigh leaving him, and with an almost reluctant pull, he finally shifts, easing himself out of you. The sudden emptiness is palpable, an ache that makes you want to reach for him again, but heâs already moving, surprisingly graceful as he rises. He glances around your bedroom, then towards the bathroom.
âWant me to get a towel?â he asks, gesturing vaguely between your legs. âA wet one, ideally.â
You blink, chest lifting with a giggle. âOh, right. Yeah, bathroom cabinet, bottom shelf.â You watch him disappear, the absurdity of the moment deeply endearing. He emerges a moment later, a small hand towel clutched in his fist, already damp, and he kneels back between your legs, cleaning you.
The warm cloth against your skin sends a fresh shiver through you, but itâs his focused, unselfconscious tenderness that melts your insides. He looks up, an apologetic grimace on his face. âI just realized I donât exactly have a change of clothes on me.â
You trace his jaw, the curve of his ear. âWell, I mean,â you muse, a playful smirk tugging at your lips, âwe could always see how you look in my pajamas. Iâm sure my oversized college sweatshirt would be⌠form-fitting.â
âI don't think youâre ready for that sight.â He pats your inner thigh, then rises, tossing it to the side. âCome on. Letâs get into bed.â
You slide under the blankets, the silk against your bare skin a welcoming sensation. He joins you immediately, the mattress dipping under his weight, and pulls you close, your bodies spooning, limbs tangling. His arm finds its way around your waist, his hand splayed flat against your stomach. Your fingers twine with his, and your leg hooks over his, pressing your hip to his.
Thereâs a moment in which you turn your head on the pillow, meeting his eyes in the dim light. He now lies on his side, facing you, one hand tucked beneath his head.
âI love you,â you say again, the words unbidden.
A smile spreads across his face, lighting up his tired eyes. He pulls you impossibly closer, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, then looks down at you. âYou know those people who use songs as their alarm?â
âWhat does that have to do with what I just said?â
âThey say you should always choose a song youâll never get tired of.I donât think Iâll ever get tired of hearing you say those words.â
âThat⌠was a weird route to get there.â
He kisses the tip of your nose, lingering on your lips shortly after. âIâm just saying. You could say it every day. Every hour. And Iâd never get sick of it.â His thumb strokes your hand and you melt into him, every molecule of your being sighing in tranquility. âBy the way,â he says, his tone sounding hesitant, âI told my parents about you.â
You pull back, just slightly, enough to stare up at him, your eyebrows shooting to your hairline. âWait. What?â
âIt was like a week ago.â
âWe werenât even speaking.â
He lets out a small, sheepish chuckle. âI know. But I still thought about you all the time. My mom scolded me through the phone for not telling you the truth sooner.â His nose crinkles, probably remembering the call. âThey said theyâd really like to meet you someday.â
âSo, our first trip together is going to be⌠Kansas?â
âSmallville,â he corrects proudly. âWhat can I say? Iâm a traditional guy.â
âWell, to be a âtraditional guy,â you havenât even asked me to be your girlfriend yet.â
âOh. Right. I guess Iââ
âAre you going to?â
âIâwould you want to?â
You laugh, pulling him into a kiss. âYouâre such a dork.â
When you break apart, heâs smilingâreally smiling, the kind that lights up his whole face and carves deep dimples into his cheeks.
âSo is that a yes?â
âYes, Clark. Iâll be your girlfriend.â
âOkay. Good. Because Iâm already very emotionally invested.â
At that moment, you snort into his chest. Sleep begins to pull at your limbs, heavy and soft, and your eyes flutter closed without resistance. His arms tucks your head beneath his chin, his breath steady against your hair, and for the first time in what feels like forever, your mind is quiet. No anxious spirals. No fear of him vanishing now that youâve let your guard down. Just stillness.
Maybe itâs true, what the wise ones say: youâre never too much in the hands of the right person.
Somehow, it feels even truer in his.
dividers by: @bbyg4rlhelps <3
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Help Iâm still at the restaurant (watched f4 and they were all I could think about)
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