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Grasshopper's Dream Cafe Located: Jeongseon, South Korea

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Reblog to give prev the power to write their fanfiction

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"Give me your Batman brain."

Bruce, who has been tracking criminals at the batcomputer for hours, stares at Dick. "What?"

Dick, only about twelve years old, is looking up at Bruce with ominous sincerity. He makes grabby hands. "Give me. Your Batman brain. Give it."

Bruce raises a brow, but figures this must be a strange thing children do. Perhaps Dick has brain damage from training, who knows. He hesitantly mimes grabbing his brain from the top of his head and putting it in Dick's hand. Dick sets the pretend-brain off to the side, placing a pretend-glass case over it for later.

Dick seems satisfied. "Okay. I threw a block of legos at my classmate Tarence. He was giving our teacher a panic attack and had to be dealt with."

Bruce raises a brow and opens his mouth to speak, but Dick cuts him off. "Wait wait wait, your Batman brain is over there. Now you only have Dad brain. Gimme Dad."

Bruce, unfortunately, cannot argue with that logic, so he pats Dick's head and asks for a step-by-step reenactment of the event so he knows how to best defend his son at the meeting with the principal.

As with many things Dick randomly invented as a child, the metaphorical exchange of brains stays in the family forever. Bruce will often catch Damian being grumpy and go, "Hey, give me your Robin brain. You've been using it for too long, it's getting overcooked." And Damian, relunctantly, will suction cup his head with his fingers and deposit his Robin brain in Bruce's hands, who will hold it very carefully while Damian, using only his 10-year-old Damian brain, grabs his largest stuffed-animal and squeezes it to self-soothe.

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Metropolis has one of the least corrupt police departments in the DCU, because some sneaky bastard reporter who looks like a nerdy lumberjack keeps sniffing out and exposing all the racists in the department. (This is because Superman, while not always listening, can always hear when one of them to start saying racist things and once he does he immediately starts investigating as Clark.)

Who watches the watchers? Some hulking bespectacled doofus, apparently.

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Gothamites are the unholy combination of Massholes and New Yorkers

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Guys, it got so much freaking worse. KOSA is bad, but SCREEN is even worse, somehow.

"Sen. Mike Lee has introduced the SCREEN ACT, a bill that applies the "harmful to minors" standard used to ban LGBTQ+ books and resources in schools and libraries and apply it nationally to the internet.

Any site that has any amount of material "harmful to minors" would be forced to employ surveillance tech (biometric scans, ID uploads, background checks) to prevent minors from accessing "pornography."

You will not be surprised to learn that this is backed by the Heritage Foundation.

Unlike some of the state age-verification laws, many of which are being challenged in court, SC will be enforced by the FTC, which has the ability to levy fines, raid business and freeze bank accounts. Yes, meaning that even non-for-profits like Ao3 will suffer.

This is something for all US users to keep on their radar. Call your reps, call your senators, and spread the word to protect our archive!"

- When talking with Republicans play up the fact that this would force Elon to implement age verification systems on X (yes do call it X during the call). Elon's been threatening to primary Republicans who stand in his way so there's fear of him. Also play up concerns about "Liberals" doxxing people or Chinese hackers.

- When talking with Democrats, play up the connections to Project 2025 and suggest voters will not be happy to see Democrats siding with it.

Republicans:

Ted Cruz, Texas (Chairman) - Phone: (202) 224-5922

John Thune, South Dakota - Phone: (202) 224-2321

Roger Wicker, Mississippi - Phone: (202) 224-6253

Deb Fischer, Nebraska - Phone: (202) 224-6551

Jerry Moran, Kansas - Phone: (202) 224-6521

Dan Sullivan, Alaska - Phone: (202) 224-3004

Marsha Blackburn, Tennessee - Phone: (202) 224-3344

Todd Young, Indiana - Phone: (202) 224-5623

Ted Budd, North Carolina - (202) 224-3154

Eric Schmitt, Missouri - (202) 224-5721

John Curtis, Utah - Phone: (202) 224-5251

Bernie Moreno, Ohio - Phone: 202-224-2315

Tim Sheehy, Montana - Phone: (202) 224-2644

Shelley Moore Capito, West Virginia - Phone: (202) 224-6472

Cynthia Lummis, Wyoming - Phone: (202) 224-3424

Democrats:

Maria Cantwell, Washington (Ranking Member) - Phone: (202) 224-3441

Amy Klobuchar, Minnesota - Phone: (202) 224-3244

Brian Schatz, Hawaii - Phone: (202) 224-3934

Ed Markey, Massachusetts - Phone: (202) 224-2742

Gary Peters, Michigan - Phone: (202) 224-6221

Tammy Baldwin, Wisconsin - Phone: (202) 224-5653

Tammy Duckworth, Illinois - Phone: (202) 224-2854

Jacky Rosen, Nevada - Phone: (202) 224-6244

Ben Ray Luján, New Mexico - Phone: (202) 224-6621

John Hickenlooper, Colorado - Phone: (202) 224-5941

John Fetterman, Pennsylvania - Phone: (202) 224-4254

Andy Kim, New Jersey - Phone: (202) 224-4744

Lisa Blunt Rochester, Delaware - Phone: (202) 224-2441

SCRIPT

Hi, my name is [], and I am one of Senator []’s constituents. I live in [city, zip code - leave your full address if leaving a voicemail].

I am calling in regards to a bill that was recently introduced in the Senate Committee on Commerce, Science, and Transport: the SCREEN act.

I am asking Senator [] to either take no action or vote against this bill because of its implications for freedom of speech. [insert one of the other concerns listed above]. Thank you for your time and for listening to my concerns.

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Bruce, coming back from his training years as a new Eldirtch Being and praying Alfred won’t notice: “Alfred, I—”

Alfred, who was secretly an Eldritch Being the entire time and can suddenly See Bruce who can suddenly See him too:

Bruce:

Alfred:

Bruce: “…well.”

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*Damian and Jon on a stakeout in Gotham (he literally just showed up and wouldn't leave)*

Jon: "Dang, Dick's allergic to kiwis? Human allergies are so weird?"

Jon: "What are you allergic to?"

Damian, deadpanned: "Pomegranates."

Jon: "Pomegranates?? That's like the most random fruit ever? Your bodies are so strange."

Damian: "Says the one allergic to a rock?"

Clark, 2,400 miles away in Metropolis: "Damn..."

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somehow instead of saying "as a treat", I've started using the phrase "for morale", as if my body is a ship and its crew, and I (the captain) have to keep us in high spirits, lest we suffer a mutiny in the coming days.

and so I will eat this small block of fancy cheese, for morale. I will take a break and drink some tea, for morale. I will pick up that weird bug, for morale.

I'm not sure if it helps, but it does entertain me

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Types of brain fog:

Brain is primordial sludge & you are drowning in it

U are a ghost and nothing is real

Mental equivalent of attempting to stream some high-res video game when all you have is dial-up

The thing you want to articulate is *right there* but you're just scrabbling at it like a cat continually failing to catch the bird on the other side of the window

The Void

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Clark is like one of those therapy dogs who can just detect sadness in people.

He's been able to do it for as long as he can remember. As a kid, he could just inexplicably feel when his pa was stressing about bills, or when his ma was upset about burning the Christmas pecan pie.

So when Clark starts working with Batman regularly, he damn near falls out of the sky, because gadzooks, this man needs help. Batman is almost perpetually oozing the silent signs of depression. Clearly, he needs a buddy. A pal. Someone to hover super close to him until he starts to feel better.

Bruce is constantly wondering why the hell Clark feels the need to press against his back instead of just standing a few feet behind him like a normal person. He never quite figures out that Clark (again, like a therapy dog) is trying to regulate his nervous system with warm and friendly physical contact.

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You have lived for months as a “pet” to a cruel vampire, and it has been miserable. You’ve nearly resigned to your fate when two new vampires show up to the residence claiming to be from VETH (Vampires for the Ethical Treatment of Humans).

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I didn’t take many photos this weekend, but you can enjoy this one that made me laugh.

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i wish mosquitos didn't make you itchy and give you horribly infectious diseases. i wouldn't begrudge them a humble nibble were it not so

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Ok so my kid had an ear infection, right? As kids often do.

The doctor scraped out a bit of earwax to have a better look inside.

I was sent a bill for $200 PER EAR for this 5 second procedure which I did not give permission for them to do.

That was key- they did not ASK me if they could do this "procedure". And, as I OWN a medical practice (it's me. The medical practice is me, sitting in my house on video calls) I knew to call them when this bill came in to be like "You did not obtain informed consent for this procedure, and it was not en emergency procedure. You had full ability to gain my consent and didn't. I'm not paying."

And the massive hospital who owned the bill said "yuh-huh you do have to pay."

And I said "I own a practice. I know these laws. I do not owe you money for this."

And they conducted an "internal review" and SURPRISE! Decided I totally owed them money and they had never done anything wrong ever.

And so I called my state's Attorney General office, and explained the situation because, as I mentioned, I know the law. The AG got in touch within a couple days to say they were taking the case and would send the massive hospital conglomerate a knock it off, guys letter.

Lo and Behold, today I have a letter where said hospital graciously has agreed to forfeit the payment.

"How not to get screwed over by companies" should be part of civics class.

Know your rights and know who to call when they're infringed on. This whole process cost me $0 and honestly less effort than I would have expected.

May this knowledge find its way to someone else who can use it.