doingnotsogoodalso

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thunderbolts came out on streaming so I finally watched it with the missus. who decided to name them all.

(and at the exact same time as walker decided that bob was stupid and that he was Bobby and Bobbink for the rest of the movie)

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GAG REEL IS OUT....

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GAG REEL IS OUT....

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again mcu pr is fucking CRAZY wyatt russell for being funny has single handedly made people worship marvels manged animal of a shallow police brutality allegory except it's not even allegorical he just does that now they throw in by the scruff sometimes

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I think 'its like a frank miller creation' is a good descriptor for what comics usagent is like. like oh god here's this absolute fucking freak he's back in the canon it was uncomfortable in a semi predictable way and then deeply fascinating and now uncomfortable again.

I think they should let frank miller get his grubby paws on john walker. I really don't mean that but I'd be fascinated.

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I think they should let frank miller get his grubby paws on john walker. I really don't mean that but I'd be fascinated.

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My fiancé calls the ugly horrible john walker plush our son and I'm about to be Emma Walker

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thunderbolts wing thoughts under tha cut because it's actually long.

Now you might be thinking (as in I am always thinking) there are so many guns all the time so much concrete and glass and dangerous materials for such delicate limbs to be out. Which is why I'm implementing the common sense rule of keep-it-in-your-fuck-ing-costume(and-stop-wearing-just-hoodies-yelena) or KIIYFIC. When applicable.

The bird of prey wings I give super soldiers (Bradley with epic hawk wings dot png he deserves them) and supers of that general type are often too large proportional to their lame human bodies to fit comfortably. Maybe an in world point for Why The Shield? Wing Shields!

It's fun to draw big wings shielding people you understand.

What does this mean for the taco shield literally do not even worry about it. Don't worry about it.

Ava keeps her hummingbird wings proportionally small and easily foldable in her suit, easy! Do they phase also and need to be covered with torches or material? Why does her suit material turn invisible? I do not know and I'm not willing to watch AMatW after being burned by Quantumania.

Bucky I've seen be given metal wings in times of old but I'm kind of unwilling to fuck with the extent and implications of his disability and limb differences for funny bird when it's already so mishandled, so sorry James. So we're keeping the bat hawk wins because they're Metal in Style. Sleek and swag. Congratulations James.

Yelena also has smaller wings, they're also black and white and I personally think they would look great with her outfits. Monotone as they are. Does she disguise her wings for operations don't know she doesn't change her hair. The red room isn't crazy about disguises. Maybe because they're so good you'd never get a profile on them ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

Alexei I don't like you but I think that your Black Widow Ohio Look is the funniest thing and I think this random Dahmer-looking suburban guy should have giant fuck off wings.

I'm attached to pigeon Bob now thank you commenter. I hope he leaves dust all over everything all the time. I hope someone startles him and it's the loudest thing in the world (pigeons have a 'noise feather'). Godspeed.

John I'm putting in a blender. I think he's just as awful with regulating with his wings as he is everything else like a giant emotional banner that's knocking over furniture and probably Bob. Ruffled feathers. Why are you posturing in the kitchen you're fine. You're hitting the ceiling.

Did super soldiers have different wings before if they're so personal in choice? Yeah Probably but I don't know how that'd work and I'm unwilling to figure it out right now. Steve Rogers grew new bones and muscles in like ten minutes they'll be fine.

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I trip and fall and several photographs of clé bennett battlestar fall out of my pockets

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By Your Mandates FINSIHED and I literally cannot bring myself to read anything else for a WHILE I've lost it. I'm gone . Go read it Please (it's sentryagent)

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thunderbolts*!

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ueg...

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daemon assignments hear me out.

• yelena snowshoe hare (know it in my heart, it will also do that scary ass wide pose florence does have you seen hares do that. change colour per season for camouflage and I think yelena should have white animal association in general)

• ava dragonfly (same reason in as hummingbird. also im scared of dragonflies, incredibly competent hunters, come out of nowhere)

• john golden malinois (gestures vaguely at the themes. golden and mix and malinois you get it. smaller than the traditional k9. so fucking desperate to jump into the line of fire please god let them bite)

• alexei bear (some say bear dog for a more manageable size I say dogs are too loyal. big lazy bear out of their prime)

• bob hognose snake (snake, funny snake. I think they hide in his clothes. snakes represent duality. more going on than you'd think. surprisingly bitey.)

• bucky tabby cat/white wolfdog (I think his true nature is tabby cat but I like the idea of hydra splitting and reforming daemons at their convenience. sorry about your personhood and identity king you are irrevocably changed even if you know it’s not You)

you could not pay me to figure out naming conventions here

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HELP MEEEEEEEE

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SpongeBob Hands Out Image im literally a huge John Walker fan I just remembered something about ‘would you like your favourite character in real life’ and went Ourgg….

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It’s easier to sympathise with characters behind a screen so I understand how you can forgive John for being the way he is in abstract but if a white man was condescending to my face ("Tie yourselves up.") I wouldn’t care how much military training he had I’d tear him in half. Ava and Yelena are stronger than any marine.