dizzyrace - Tumblr blog

[dizzyrace]

thinking out loud, given our current society, there are people who believe in extremes like anarchy, [insert-race] supremacy, communism... and those groups are growing in influence in response to culture. But the people who truly just want to do what will make society better for everyone are being distracted by those extremes so you get people equating left with socialists and right with racists?

[dizzyrace]

a spiral

maybe it’s accutane or my aunt is coming or maybe it’s just maybellinfj

today feels like.. if I didn’t speak up, would my coworkers think to invite me to meetings -_- if I didn’t ask first, would people ever want to hang out with me? ever? like me specifically.

[dizzyrace]

I went on a detour but I think I found my way back.

[dizzyrace]

The point is not that God will refuse you admission to His eternal world if you have not got certain qualities of character: the point is that if people have not got at least the beginnings of those qualities inside them, then no possible external conditions could make a 'Heaven' for them -- that is, could make them happy with the deep, strong, unshakable kind of happiness that God intends for us.

“Mere Christianity”, C.S. Lewis

[dizzyrace]

Revisiting tumblr for the first time in months bc I can't fall asleep. I like the stuff I wrote before because it's like past-me knew future-me would need to see these truths written out and isn't that how truth is, timeless. Anyway, I guess I can't sleep bc I slept almost half the day and drank milk tea when I woke up around dinnertime. But also thoughts. Yesterday was our high school 5-year reunion and it was a lot less awkward than a lot of us expected (thank God for alcohol). For a moment, I was scared to see the friends that I haven't seen in years... but then we joked around and talked about life things like old friends. I felt relieved... part of me regrets not keeping in touch better and I was scared it was too late. Speaking of too late, it's 3:18 and I decided to start waking up earlier so I can go to work earlier and do devos/breakfast. GG~ =_=

[dizzyrace]

lol...

24 Struggles All INFJs can unterstand

1. INFJs are extremely private. They are constantly building a world inside them and can take awhile to unleash their secret hidden world till the timing is right, if ever right. Think of the movie Amelie.

2. INFJs have a horrible time revealing their true feelings romantically. They are overly concerned with perfectionism. They have a calm exterior, but underneath are riddled with questions and hope. How many of them move on into relationships is a mystery. BUT THEY WILL BE THE BEST DAMNED PERSON TO DATE YOU’LL EVER FIND. Because they’ll make you cookies. Guide you well into your future. And really care about treating you and themselves right.

3. Can be rock solid calm, then a strange wind happens that carries a dead bird. Then they are super sad, and say lots of deep things from nowhere.

4. With the giant imagination / visionary minds, they can have a tough time dealing with daily, practical matters. Not able to answer the question “What’s the point?” can lead to neglecting cleaning, financial responsibilities, etc.

5. Tendency to hyper organize certain things and code them. Such as wearing earrings that match shoes, bookshelves ordered by specific genres, or aligning objects for no reason. General okayness with a few piles. General madness when there is too much out of control. General concern if around people who hyper clean, “Are they OCD?”

6. Perfectionists. The worst thing you can do to an INFJ is set the bar too high. “What do you mean that the only way to get an ‘A’ is a 98%?”

7. They’re super hawks of insight. INFJs struggle all the time on whether to tell people that they’re about to go on a path of destruction and terror, or if they should just let people find that out themselves. They have excellent clarity for the future, but they don’t want to lose friends with their candor and weirdness.

8. There extreme insight for the future can cause a sudden, “Oh, God! The world is going to end!”

9. Insomnia. Splurges of hyperactive thought. An overindulgence of creativity. Alcohol and caffeine are more there nightmare than you could arguably understand. Caffeine causes too much creativity, alcohol causes too much honesty.

10. Mega decisive. It can be tedious to watch people struggle to make decisions, especially on basic things like ordering food, what to wear, etc. This is why an INFJ will get involved to help you make a decision, not just out of kindness, but probably because they can’t stand the trivial indecision.

11. Being so involved in other people’s lives that they don’t understand themselves. They like to counsel people. They’ll spend days with you. They’ll spend days studying you. Then all of sudden they realize they’ve been a chameleon. And they’ll seek solitude.

12. Super emotional childhood moments. Being an INFJ evens out as you get older because you have the joy of language to express yourself. Can you imagine being a kid who is constantly evaluating death, disease, murder, creatures in the closet, missing parents, and did I mention death? INFJ kids are aware of death all too young. They may cry a lot and have a hard time expressing it to adults.

13. Loving a lot of creative things and not sure what they like the most. INFJs are some of the greatest students. INTPS and INTJS might be the only better students, and with INFJs perfectionism, it’s probably their social concerns for their network of giant friends that corner their grades. INFJs struggle over what they like best, so they may double major, get multiple Master’s… they just really want to explore stuff they like.

14. Even though they are introverted, they are not extremely introverted. They generally have a wide, crazy wide network of friends. They connect well with others due to their intuitive-feelers combination, and they also like to run away once the chameleon effect takes place.

15. If they don’t watch their money, it can be eaten away. They are generally altruistic. They want to help. Sacrificing finances isn’t heart break for an INFJ, till it sinks in later.

16. Under stress, INFJs can be super confused about priorities. Like, “Hey, you have a final tomorrow. Why are you baking chocolate pumpkin spiced muffins that take three hours to make? And you’re using real pumpkin?”

17. When they see a vision of the future, they can be stubborn. And think they’re right. And often are. Thus the fews times they are not… they really don’t care about other opinions. They’re trying to steer people away from the big black hole of demons that only they can predict. Yikes.

18. The love of harmony runs deep in this personality. Too extreme of situations can cause an INFJ to run and hide in a closet till things are more calm. Other times, they will be the one leading everyone out of the chaos.

19. Can negotiate well if they think it will harm the friendship. Don’t hurt the friendship! Anything but that!

20. Sometimes people think an INFJ is too nice. An INFJ usually sees themselves as 25% evil due to all the crazy things they come across and all the potential for evil things they could do.

21. If not trained, an INFJ conversation can go like this, “I was going to the store, when I thought about unicorns, so I about JENGA.” Because somehow JENGA connected to their chlidhood. Because somehow unicorns connected to that too.

22. INFJs are some of the best writers. They can fiercely write about everything and anything. And never show anybody out of fear of what people will think of them after they realize how insightful INFJs happen to be.

23. They can become extremely obsessive. An INFJ in love mode is the most obsessed creature on the planet. They may take awhile to warm up to people because they know of the insanity than can brew within.

24. May understand the conclusion incredibly well, but have a hard time explaining it to others through a cloud of beautiful tangents. Drugs are not your friends, INFJS. You are precious, and that stuff is not going to help you explain big picture stuff.

(Source)

[dizzyrace]

Metro thoughts 8.21.15

The scary thing isn't that I'm alone behind these walls. And it's not like I'm afraid that nobody will ever be able to get to me here. The scary thing is that I've actually become so ok being here and I might even push down anyone who tries to climb up the walls.

[dizzyrace]

You can’t spend your whole life holding the door open for people and then being angry when they don’t thank you. Nobody asked you to hold the fucking door.

Orange Is The New Black (via thenovelofus)

[dizzyrace]

It’s not just this one guy doing something crazy but the people who he grew up with, the values reinforced in him, the stuff he watched or read... it’s more scary to think that maybe some people harbor the same hatred and think this guy absolutely did the right thing and maybe they’ll never go to this extent in action but they’ll be influencing the next guy who will go this far

When white people go on shooting sprees, their actions are frequently attributed to mental illness and, thus, they’re not considered fully accountable for the harm they’ve inflicted. This narrative – which is not afforded to people of color – feeds into the assumption that incidents like what happened at Emanuel AME Church are isolated tragedies executed by lone gunmen. Essentially, it excuses the system that allows racialized terrorism to keep happening.

Continue reading…

[dizzyrace]

Sometimes, I really really really wish I weren’t working so close to home.

[dizzyrace]

Learning to give thanks for those small things, to really appreciate them and holding onto the truth behind them, that the Lord has blessed me and his mercies are new every morning.

[dizzyrace]

Revelations 3:15-16 “I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth.”

Really understanding this truth lately. Love me or hate me, but don’t ignore me. I wish that you would hate me instead, then I could at least treat you as my enemy. But when you don’t even care, where do I take this hurt upon hurt?

[dizzyrace]

Be subject for the Lord's sake to every human institution, whether it be to the emperor as supreme, or to governors as sent by him to punish those who do evil and to praise whose who do good. For this is the will of God, that by doing good you should put to silence the ignorance of foolish people. Live as people who are free, not using your freedom as a cover-up for evil, but living as servants of God. Honor everyone. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the emperor.

1 Peter 2:13-17

[dizzyrace]

The last paragraph

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Romans 12:19-21 “Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’ To the contrary, ‘if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.’ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

I used to think the first sentence of this passage was encouraging passivity or putting up with evil. But today I read it again and noticed the stuff after, how active it is. Do these good things instead of repaying evil that’s been done to you. But not doing anything isn't one of the options. Hard teaching for a non-confrontational, passive person like me =.=

[dizzyrace]

And when they had called in the apostles, they beat them and charged them not to speak in the name of Jesus, and let them go. Then they left the presence of the council, rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer dishonor for the name.

Acts 5:40-41