ditchdead

[ditchdead]

She lowkey toxic af but that Cloaca put me to sleep

[ditchdead]

customer was a shitlib, and treatlerite. one night she orders grubhub, drunker than usual. kamala harris had lost the election. i delivered chipotle as a male driver. she didn't like that. not. one. bit.

[ditchdead]

I’m so hungover at work I am making cocktails of 5 different juices like I’m in the fucking hospital

[ditchdead]

[ditchdead]

while i was trying to wade through the large amounts of people trying to leave the central subway station, everyone abruptly came to a halt in front of the subway turnstiles. two french girls had misunderstood the tap-out process, and one of them was now stuck behind the gate. as i was wracking my brain on how to explain the tap-in tap-out process of the milan metro to both of them with my rudimentary french while they both got increasingly upset at the closed gate between them, a young teenager suddenly pushed me to the side.

i was just about to give him my most scathing disgruntled glare when he took out his ticket and, after realizing they had no common language, started gesticulating wildly in front of the french girl left behind. he pointed at the ticket, then at her, and very seriously said: “on three, we go.” she nodded, and after he counted to three, holding up his fingers so there could be no confusion, they sprinted through the gate together, giggling profusely afterwards as if they had just pulled off the heist of the century,

it was just a small moment during the morning commute. but i realized then and there that the time i had spent trying to intellectualize the problem and wondering if my lack of language skills would be awkward the situation could have already been resolved. and that while i had been mad about being pushed aside, the teenager got it exactly right: no questions, no fear or shyness, just direct action to help where you can and rushing there to do so. i think about him every time now when i run to lift someone’s pram or ask a lost looking person if they need my help despite the fear of being rude. on three, we go.

[ditchdead]

I am not too smart for my own good I am too DELICIOUS

[ditchdead]

update on personal life stuff

got hit by 12 cars and died. sory. all at once. no traces left behind. I think one of the cars was carnivorous

[ditchdead]

There’s a freaking CHEETO in the White House and all you’re doing is blogging about sucking anime cock!

[ditchdead]

Françoise Hardy on the téléphone

[ditchdead]

13 year old me was min maxing fire emblem awakening at 3am when I should have been getting my ass beat. What the fuckk do you mean chrom can’t speak to women until chapter 11 so he auto marries the pink haired dancer so her son from the future inherits Arthur

U are failing MATH bc you are studying MARTH

[ditchdead]

Winter Porch - Amanda Acker , 2022.

Australian, b.  1982  -

Oil on panel , 12 x 16 in.

[ditchdead]

The dog who is so angry he cannot move. He cannot eat. He cannot sleep. He can just barely growl. Bound so tightly with tension and anger, he approaches the state of rigor mortis.

David Lynch, “The Angriest Dog in the World,” LA Weekly, 1983-1992

[ditchdead]

my mouth froths and i twitch uncontrollably when i remember i have a ps vita

[ditchdead]

[ditchdead]

do you think it keeps travis up at night that justin is effortlessly the gayest and cuntiest brother

[ditchdead]

Put me back in the water right now or ill die

[ditchdead]

had a prophetic dream where my dead father was disappointed in me for smoking cigarettes even though I've had life-saving surgery in my time on earth, so it is such a waste for me to ruin the second chance I was given. And this dream caused me so much anxiety, but now... Looking back in the daylight... motherfucker you smoked cigarettes even though you had a wife and a child to take care of AND it killed you so I do not want to hear the anxiety manifestation version of you in my DREAMS talking about this