diaryofamess

[diaryofamess]

ebay listing for baby shoes, never worn because he grew rapidly into a child and then a teenager and then an adult man who has no memory of me raising him for the past year

[diaryofamess]

TROBED IN THE SAME COMIC AS TWELVECLARA HOLY SHIT OMG OMG

[diaryofamess]

Goals i have for a healthier lifestyle

Make bed daily

Clean room of a morning

Smile daily

Write down goals for each day. (I do this in my notes on my phone and tick off the goals I’ve accomplished)

Journal

Find a mentor

Listen to more mindfulness podcasts

Take time for yourself

Work on weekends

Learn to communicate more with friends and family

Don’t talk about people unless it’s something positive

Use slow cooker more

On Sunday’s work out meals for the week to avoid getting takeout

Drink roughly 2 litres of water or more daily

Wash face/moisture morning and night

Sundays write out or use calendar to schedule the week. (I use app Shiftify)

Stretch daily for 15mins preferably first thing of a morning

Write out a to do list, things such as book doctors appointment, book car service the little responsibilities that slip our minds when life gets in the way. I do this on my notes in my phone and find this easy to add things too

[diaryofamess]

I made this in January and never implemented it🤡

How to get my life together

- meditate

-sit/lay down in nice cozy spot

-listen to calming sounds

-close eyes and focus on breathing, try breathing slowly and calmly

-push away any thoughts

-try for 5 mins a day

- exercise

- download fabulous and Dreamfora

- wake up early

- stop procrastinating

- become that girl

- live your aesthetic dreams

- journal

-words like you're talking to someone else

-or pretend that you're someone you know, talk like you would to a friend

- read daily (esp Quran)

- write daily

- eat healthy

- aromatherapy (essential oils)

- have a schedule on my wall

[diaryofamess]

Also feel free to join our study/mental health server on Discord. We’re doing self help “group therapy” calls, studying together and much more. We’re stronger together!

Lots of love! <3

[diaryofamess]

A survival guide for finals week

It's coming up unfortunately and it's probably the most stressful week you'll have in the semester and for some reason, every time it comes around it seems like the universe has it out for you. Here are some tips that have helped me and hopefully can help you!!! Feel free to add on!

Carry water with you everywhere. Nervous? Drink. Tired? Drink. Angry? Drink. Get hydrated and drink lots of water.

Don't cram. Get GOOD sleep. No all-nighters. Please

Start studying now. When the week comes, you'll be too stressed to actually study effectively

Take walks. When you get stressed and overwhelmed, take a walk! Get out of your room and head and just walk until you feel better (please be safe though)

Caffeine

Eat something healthy. Not everything has to be healthy. But some foods like salmon, broccoli, whatever. Nourish your body and it'll nourish you back

Save some money so you can take the week off.

Have a relaxing outlet that doesn't take energy. Maybe a cozy game? Latte art?

Play with some animals. This is scientifically proven to reduce stress btw so it's for health reasons

Your finals don't always happen when your classes happen so make sure you triple check dates and times

Feel some sunshine

Get a good Playlist that makes you happy

Try some yoga or something to distract yourself when you wanna cry

Learn how to harvest salt from your tears

If it's a cumulative final, go through past exams and quizzes and stuff. Those tend to cover the "important" material and will likely show up

Make cute study sheets! I know if my notes look boring I CAN'T study

Naps! Bonus if they're with animals

Try to get a study group together and study and chill

Believe in yourself! You got this!!!! You're better than you think and I have full faith in you and your abilities!

If you love the class, study because you love it!

If you hate the class, study so you never have to see that fucking teacher and listen to that stupid class ever again in your entire life.

Make yourself happy, cute drinks and happy, cute meals

Celebrate at the end. Please. You deserve it

Don't let it consume your every waking moment. It's just a test. Just another test

Tell yourself how amazing you are. You're doing something not everyone even gets the chance to. That's super awesome!!!

Eat some cake

Gum and crunchy veggies are both great stress busters

[diaryofamess]

Uni students:

Quick reminder: you are not your grades. You are a whole person made up of all of your complexities, experiences, and memories, and more. Your grades are such a small part of that. For all of you studying for finals like me, study hard, I believe in you, remember to rest, remember to forgive yourself. Your best is all you can do. You are loved.

[diaryofamess]

Broke college student tip:

Learn to love cooking. Like get into it. Enjoy it. Get excited to cook. Why? When you learn to cook and enjoy it you'll save money. Lots of money. And you'll be eating better, healthier food too.

For example. I'm eating seafood and veggie pasta right now with a white wine cream sauce. In a restaurant, this would be a fancy meal, costing $20 or so for a small portion. Literally cost me like $5 or so in ingredients to make. And like 20 minutes to cook. And I made enough for lunch AND dinner. When you know how to cook you can make cheap foods taste amazing.

Here's some advice how to make this easier:

Buy frozen things. Frozen veggies, frozen fruits, frozen meats, etc. Frozen lasts longer and saves you money and stress.

Have basic herbs and spices on hand. Salt, pepper (red, black, and white), thyme, rosemary, basil, garlic powder, onion powder, turmeric, bay leaf (chopped is best), cinnamon, paprika, cumin, and sage are my most commonly used ones!

Common recipe ingredients to keep on hand: pasta, rice, lemon/lime juice, garlic, onion, white wine, frozen veggies, potatoes, frozen meats, sugar, butter, pasta sauces, tomatoes, eggs, soda/pineapple juice/beer (great for marinades or cooking meat).

Frozen things when stored properly can be stored for a couple months and portioned out making quick meals easy!

Learn flavor profiles. Citrus, basil, rosemary, butter, salt, garlic, and onion are all fairly universal in their uses while things like cumin and turmeric have a stronger, earlier flavor and are great for stews, curries, pastas, soups, and sauces!

Learn to shop. If it's non-perishable and bogo, get it! Bogo (buy one get one) is basically half off and now you have two things for when you need it! Walmart brand pasta is like $0.98 a box. You can also get a bag of frozen extra small shrimp at Walmart for like $5 and there's about 50 in a bag. Shop non-perishable items by weight (price per ounce) and perishables by size.

Pasta sauce can be put in the freezer and if stored well can keep for like 3 months!

Sauté your veggies! They taste so good that way!!! A little butter, garlic, rosemary, and onion. Sprinkle with salt after and viola!

It's easy to fall into a food rut, so treat yourself every now and then with something different or challenge yourself by limiting yourself to 5 ingredients or something to make you exercise your skills.

Make your own barbecue sauce. It's so fun! All you need is molasses, ketchup, brown sugar, and whatever you want to customize it. I usually put honey and bourbon in mine.

Go on pinterest and find easy recipes! The great thing about a recipe is every single one you see is customizable and was made to the cooker's preference. You don't like mushrooms? Don't put them in and add something earthy and unami like turmeric or sumac in its place.

Tofu is easier than you think.

Rice is very filling and goes with most everything.

Keep fresh herbs fresh by putting them in water. You might even root and grow your own!

Frozen fruits are amazing for marinades or more "tropical" tasting recipes. Frozen citrus and pineapple are great for making a citrus chicken and rice! Just defrost in a bowl and then add the chicken to the bowl.

Tortillas are amazing and keep for a while in the fridge.

Print out recipes and keep them in a binder so you make notes and changes directly on the paper!

[diaryofamess]

         morning routine ideas 🥞🫖

how you spend your morning dictates your whole day. create a relaxing structure to truly get yourself ready before heading out into the world ♡

wake up early; before 8am.

don’t go on your phone. right when you wake, bask in the silence and background noise.

meditate by focusing on your breathing.

say affirmations to yourself: “i have woken up in my desired reality. today will be a good day. i am okay. i’m healthy, beautiful, and inspiring. something amazing will happen to me today. i am kind and gentle towards myself.”

stretch!

open up any blinds to let the light in

make your bed. tidy up your space.

say hello and cuddle with your pet(s)

wash your face & brush your teeth

walk your pet(s)

make a simple breakfast and drink water and/or tea and eat it outside or looking out the window.

journal. self reflect, how you feel, what you’d like to accomplish, etc. make it a goal to be more kind to yourself and keep your thoughts in check.

read a few chapters of your current read. 

what are some things you need to get done today? make a plan and set out to get it checked off.

exercise, try a new routine.

choose an outfit, do your hair, try some new looks for the season. have fun. try new things, who knows? maybe you’ll end up loving it.

go on a walk in your neighborhood. 

get in 10,000 steps

buy yourself flowers.

light a candle

put on your favorite feel good songs. let yourself go and freely sing and dance to it.

begin your studies.

rest if needed!

try a new recipe

spend time in nature

[diaryofamess]

30 Things To Do Alone

Go for a walk. I've been trying to reach 10k steps daily.

Read a book, article, or blog... just like you're doing right now. ;)

Watch a tv show. I'm currently watching Gilmore girls.

Watch the sunset/sunrise. I prefer sunsets.

Try a youtube workout. Daisy Keech is my favorite!

Do your nails. Nice nails make a vast difference in my opinion.

Go to the grocery store and buy some snacks that you've never tried before.

Try a new recipe. I'm trying carrot cake oatmeal later!

Write a letter to your future self. <3

Test old pens and throw away the dry ones.

Make a birthday wishlist. one of my favorite things to do when I'm bored and have nothing to do.

Take the 16 Personalities test. I'm an ENFP :)

Make a bucket list. I just started writing my autumn bucket list!

Research something or watch a video essay on youtube. One of my favorite channels at the moment is Mina Le.

Make a mood/vision board. You can check out my Twitter or Tumblr for some inspiration.

Scroll Pinterest for the next 6+ hours; we've all been there.

Take a long bath. Do a full skin/hair care routine.

Cut/dye your hair. I just cut curtain bangs, and I'm loving it!!

Bake something for a loved one; I made lemon-poppy seed cookies for my Dad.

Create a new playlist. I've started making an autumn playlist, lol.

Make a photo wall. I made one last year and still love it!

Accomplished your to-do list, and you'll feel great once you're done.

Get rid of old clothes, make room for new stuff.

Go to a new coffee shop and get something to try.

Learn how to crochet. I made a sweater for my dog, lmao.

Make yourself a drink, like a tea, coffee, or smoothie!

Declutter your digital space. (emails, photos, apps, etc...)

Make your room cozy and take a nap, or just relax for a bit.

Plan some outfits and look for things to buy online.

Apply a facemask and watch a coming-of-age movie. (my guilty pleasure, lol..)

Please feel free to add more suggestions in the comments! <3

✩‧₊*:・love ya ･:*₊‧✩

[diaryofamess]

Femme Fatale Guide: How To Reduce Social Anxiety To Boost Your Confidence, Make Friends, & Become Magnetic

Some practical tips to reframe your thoughts going into social settings to help you boost your confidence and step into your power. Here's how to hold your own in every conversation, connect with anyone, and use the art of seduction, influence, and charm to become a social magnet to level up in every area of life.

HOW TO MANAGE SOCIAL ANXIETY: 

Everyone Is Self-Conscious: Remember that, like yourself, everyone is more focused on (and critical of) how they’re presenting themselves and their actions, not yours. People care too much about how they look to overanalyze what you do. They often forget most (if not all) of the things you say in a casual conversation by the next day. Realizing that we all are too self-focused to really care about the small things others do or say is freeing. This reminder can help calm your nerves and reframe the situation to ease anxiety when you start to worry about what others are thinking of you in a social setting or during a conversation.  

Prioritize Self-Presentation: Consider how confident you feel with your actions and self-presentation when interacting with others before worrying about their impressions of you. Focus on how you can show up as your best self when engaging in social activities and conversations. People notice when others like and feel comfortable with themselves. This quality is attractive to others and will make them feel more at ease when speaking to you. Interactions flow better when your conversation partner is relaxed, so finding ways to stay calm when speaking makes it easier to manage social anxiety. Allow your self-assurance to speak for itself. This ability to hold your own will radiate through your words, tonality, delivery, and mannerisms during any conversation. Simply put – People like others who already like themselves. Who you attract into your circle reflects the person you've decided to be.

Listen. More than you speak: This tip kills two birds with one stone – it allows you to sit back without worrying about what you need to say while allowing the other person to feel heard. The easiest way to be well-liked is to give people the space to share their thoughts, have them be valued, and feel understood. We have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Practice active listening to increase your charm. Use the information you uncover to drive the conversation. You don't necessarily need to be chatty or extroverted to be charismatic (more on this point later). 

TIPS FOR SOCIALIZING & MAKING FRIENDS: 

Get Curious To Connect: Follow-up questions are your best friend if you get nervous and anticipate a wave of social anxiety. These questions have a dual benefit: You’re allowing others to indulge in subjects or experiences that resonate with them and helping to guide the conversation. Listen to ways that you can branch off into related topics, mutual interests, and shared emotions or experiences. Ask relevant questions to keep the conversation flowing and demonstrates your interest and desire to connect with the other person. There’s no quality more charming than making others feel special and understood. This interpersonal skill allows you to connect with others without feeling like you need to fill up air time or be more vulnerable than you’re comfortable. It can be especially helpful to remember this advice when conversing with a stranger, authority figure, or someone else you want to impress without looking inferior (teacher, boss, industry leader, partner’s parents, etc.).  

Read & Develop Interests/Opinions:  Expanding your knowledge base provides an entry point to more people, engaging conversations, and opportunities. It’s easier to speak to people when you have some understanding of relevant topics others are discussing around the table or are of interest to the person in front of you. Take time to read about and study topics you’re interested in. Stay on top of cultural topics (movies, music, books, TV shows, etc.) and news within your chosen industry (or one you’re hoping to break into), different destinations you’ve been to or want to go to, favorite products, etc. Develop some robust opinions (don’t share those on hot-button topics like politics and religion) on these subjects and current events. Having the ability to listen to others' perspectives on a topic with an understanding of the subject matter and dive further into the topic with a distinct POV makes for an engaging conversation (and a potential new connection). 

Learn The Art of The Follow-Up: If you hit it off with someone, exchange contact information (social media, phone number, email – depending on the context of the situation and level of initial connection). Send them a relevant message at some point over the next few days to stay connected. Try something related to the conversation – like an article on a topic you discussed, or a recommendation for a coffee shop in the area. Or, get more personal if you’re comfortable, and ask how a meeting went, if they ended up liking a certain show, movie, or book, or whether they want to grab lunch at that place they mentioned they love. Remain thoughtful and interested without looking desperate. People want to know others are thinking about them as long you’re not obsessive. 

BEING EXTROVERTED VS. SOCIABLE:

Extroversion vs. introversion is about how you recharge. You can’t change this part of your nature. For some people, being around others for too long makes them feel exhausted no matter how comfortable they feel in the situation or enjoy the company. As an extroverted introvert, I’ve noticed that learning to be sociable is the key to connecting with others – even if you realize mid-conversation that you might need a week of reading a book in bed to bounce back from attending a couple of events. 

Learn how to present yourself with relaxed, open body language. Smile, and make eye contact (but not too much). Speak slowly and carefully with pauses, so your conversation partner latches on to every word and is intrigued to hear more. Use your tone of voice to communicate the emotion behind your words. Ensure the other person is done speaking before responding. Nod your head to acknowledge the person’s talking points and show they’re heard. Laugh at the correct times to bond and share your sense of humor. Shake their hand firmly. Wave and hug goodbye (when appropriate). 

[diaryofamess]

Getting in touch with your Feminine-Energy

As teased in Part 1 of my femininity series, Today we will discuss how to get in touch with your feminine energy. Fully connecting to yourself might take a while, but it will be worth it. <3

Setting clear boundaries. You don't have to let people be all up in your business if you don't want to! "I'm sure you can respect that" is a great line to use.

Meditation and visualization. This kind of goes into manifesting; visualize the life and the person you want to be and have.

Keep your space clean. You can also decorate with things you love!

Slow down. You got time! Don't let society tell you that you must have it all figured out before even graduating from university.

Journaling, reading, writing. Keep your head clear, write down your thoughts and treat your brain to a good book. <3

Don't suppress your emotions. It's okay to feel. If you're sad? Cry. If you're happy? Smile. Don't push it away.

Pay attention. Keep an eye on the people surrounding you, and catch the little things most people miss.

Being thankful and expressing gratitude. It makes you happier. Trust me. :)

Investing in yourself. This could be anything, time, money, or materialistic things. You deserve it.

Showing up as who you want to be. Fake it until you make it. ;)

Surround yourself with people who respect you. You won't get far on this journey if the people around you drag you down. Cut out toxic people if you can. <3

Focus on your education. Whether you're in school or not, try learning as much as you can. Read, learn a new language, focus on your studies...

Nourish your body properly. Take care of yourself.

Stay out of unnecessary drama. Don't waste your energy if it doesn't involve you or your friends.

Don't overthink. If you can't fix it, you might as well stop thinking about it.

Let the past go. Focus on the present and future because that's what you have control over.

Explore your style. Stop following trends and start dressing the ways you really want to. Express yourself!

Don't compare yourself to others. You literally gain nothing from it.

Learn to say no! Self-respect!

Be kind. Being kind feels so much better.

Allow yourself to be confident. This is a big one; you need to see your potential. Don't hold yourself back! <3

As always, feel free to add something positive in the comments, but if you don’t have anything nice to say, please keep it to yourself. I hope you have a beautiful day! :)

✩‧₊*:・love ya ･:*₊‧✩

[diaryofamess]

friendly reminder that you are worth everything you desire in this world !!! pls don’t ever let external factors tell you otherwise because you are so incredible and you have so much to offer to this world

[diaryofamess]

Woke up at 6am, made a bunch of plans for the month , week and day. Really feeling the productivity today. To all my millions of fans and followers, I'm back on track babyyy! Let's rock this day to the best of our abilities. Peace✌️

[diaryofamess]

Entry #2

Today I feel good. Actually good. Sure I woke up with a hangover and spent money I don’t have on a takeaway but it was incredible and cured me so I don’t regret it!

There are a few weeks to go til uni starts again and a random burst of motivation has hit me. A few weeks is enough time to start incorporating a routine into my life. My housemate and I are thinking about hitting the gym together, and maybe starting swimming again. I do miss swimming.

Maybe I’ll join a society this year. Or at least try out a few taster sessions. This could be what I need! Overall feeling excited for the new semester to start and prepared to get the wheels turning to make my life less dysfunctional 🙌

[diaryofamess]

We talk a lot about productivity on studyblr. And seeing what some people accomplish in a single day is absolutely stunning. Like damn you cooked 3 meals, cleaned, studied for 3 hours, worked for 8 hours, took a walk, made espresso, read 3 chapters, AND made a whole painting? Seeing these lists can make you feel lazy or underachieving. I promise you're not. A lot of times you just don't have small "habits" (I can't form habits for some reason so they're more like small, structured items I make a conscious effort to complete daily) that structure your day and mindset. But even if you do, remember that not everyone is 100% every day and some days, you don't do anything and that's ok! Listen to your body!

Firstly, realize that lists like the one I listed are probably exaggerated. I doubt someone can cook themselves a meal while at work and unless they're getting up at 5am, they probably don't have time to get all of that done. This is the first thing you gotta realize. Social media is full of exaggerations and lies. This includes the studyblr community. So don't fall for the expectations that you see here.

Secondly, get a schedule for yourself. Get up at a certain time, make your bed after you get up, go and wash your face. This gets your mind to transition from being asleep to doing things. Wash dishes after you use them. Hang your laundry after you finish it. Put things away after use them. Keep your shoes in the same spot and get a shower schedule going. These small things are hard at first, but get easier as they become more routine.

By doing things immediately, you don't create much clutter and your cleaning time is cut down drastically. It helps so much. Trust me.

Have relax time. I've posted this before because it's IMPORTANT. SCHEDULE YOUR BREAK AND RELAX TIME AND TREAT IT LIKE ANYTHING ELSE. IT'S NOT LESS IMPORTANT.

Find easy snacks and meals! Look at pinterest or Instagram for ideas! Egg and cheese wraps, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, salmon and mashed potatoes, etc. Especially if you work a lot like I do. The majority of my diet is "easy meals" at this point.

Make time for healthy habits. Meditation, yoga, a jog, the gym, running, swimming, reading by the creek, dancing to weird music, just get up and move and give your mind a break. You charge your phone. You need to charge yourself too.

Sleep. Please. Get a full 6-8 hours of sleep. Don't glorify sleeping small amounts. It's not a competition. I hate seeing people compare how little sleep they got, like bro that's like bragging about eating nothing but bacon and potato chips or something. Get sleep. Have a night time routine. Make sleep a sacred night time ritual even. Please. It's good for your body, your mind, your immune system, your skin, your future brain, etc. It can reduce your chances of getting in a car crash even.

Realize that life isn't a race or a competition. Life is something so short and it's meant to be enjoyed and savored. Please do something every day that makes you smile. Do something every day that makes you laugh. Do something every day that makes someone else smile. Live each day like it's the one you'll be remembered for. Spread love and kindness, especially to yourself and make sure you remind those you love that you do every chance you get. At the end of the day, you're living life, not racing in a societal race to be the most accomplished and you need a reminder about that.

[diaryofamess]

study tips to remember as we inevitably have (mini) breakdowns and burnouts during the semester

- plan out the entire day the night before; set out the next day's clothes and envision the day ahead.

- studies have shown that if we plan out the day, it eliminates the fear of the unknown, reducing the fight or flight response so we can stay calm, collected, and focused.

- exercise twice: once early in the morning to get the day's momentum started and once in the evening to de-stress

- use timers to set hard deadlines for each task

- take mini breaks after each task

- during the breaks, don't scroll through social media or websites; instead, lay your head down and blank out the mind.

- eat healthy meals and try not to consume too much sugar or added fats. post-lunch blood sugar spikes are absolutely brutal.

- GO TO OFFICE HOURS to build and maintain connections with professors.

- practice active recall: don't just read through the study notes; quiz yourself and try to each an imaginary student the concepts

- study (only!!!) 30 minutes for each class every single day to retain the information learned that day, on top of the necessary homework and assignments

- TIME MANAGEMENT IS KEY. you can maintain an active social life while being on top of everything academically by using every spare minute to work on assignments, homework, studying, etc.

- remember: it might be stressful now, but imagine the peace and comfort 5-10 years from now as you're in your dream career, reminiscing and thanking your past self for making the sacrifice and working so damn hard to get to where you are.