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i’m not joking when i say i got with a guy in the club who might have been johnny mctavish and i like to think that soap would in fact act in the same feral way that this man did. I’m so serious when i say this man kissed me like a man starved (and i loved itt)

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this is so real (i’m ovulating)

"I want to put a baby in you."

-the only marriage proposal I'll be accepting from Joel Miller

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thank you <333

thinking about the first time that businessman!joel saw commuter!reader bcs i’ve had a lot of red wine and why not. 18+ MDNI !!! unspecified age gap, no use of y/n !!! hope u enjoy <333

The first time you chose to sit in the seat across from him, he didn’t really notice you - although he’s made up for it tenfold with how much he notices now - just a flash of colour in contrast of the dull seats and his own somber work attire.

It only takes a few journeys for him to /start/ noticing, however. I mean how could he not? Your sweet smile and soft voice each time the conductor ( i think?) comes to check your ticket. Joel takes a moment to take you in, to properly digest the view in front of him.

You were young - much younger than him - that was clear. You always wore big over the ear headphones and you always sat in the table seat across from his.

He notices your beaten up bag, he notices how you’re always either tapping away on your laptop, covered in stickers or writing furiously in a well-used notebook - also covered in stickers.

But mostly he notices how much of an effect you have on him. The tightening in his chest when you send a familiar smile towards him as you sit down. How you seep into his thoughts without warning or apology.

He begins to enjoy the endless journeys to and from work - because of you. Even though you don’t talk to him or even spare a glance in his direction that often, just being close to you does something to him.

Businessman!joel who has his own laptop (very plain, not covered in stickers) out each journey but finds himself doing less and less work, instead doing that thing where you look at the person across from you in their reflection in the window.

Businessman!joel who kind of freaks out the first time you come to mind when he masturbates. Just a flash of you, just enough to make him simultaneously feel very strange and very excited, but not so much that he loses his headspace. He continues, of course, and the first time he pictures you he keeps it fairly mild.

Fairly mild.

Just you sat on his lap, moaning sweetly as he leaves decided marks on your neck.

You pressed against the wall as the two of you lose yourselves in each other, kissing like it’s that last time you’ll ever get the chance to touch.

Just you laid out so pretty for him. Whining for more and more and more. Pretty eyes staring up at him as he thrusted into you, revelling in each pretty moan that slipped from your pretty mouth.

The next time Joel sees you in the train he feels guilty about the scenes that his mind conjured the night before. He knows he shouldn’t, but the moment he sees those lips he knows the fantasies will never end.

pls let me know if u want more :)

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thinking about the first time that businessman!joel saw commuter!reader bcs i’ve had a lot of red wine and why not. 18+ MDNI !!! unspecified age gap, no use of y/n !!! hope u enjoy <333

The first time you chose to sit in the seat across from him, he didn’t really notice you - although he’s made up for it tenfold with how much he notices now - just a flash of colour in contrast of the dull seats and his own somber work attire.

It only takes a few journeys for him to /start/ noticing, however. I mean how could he not? Your sweet smile and soft voice each time the conductor ( i think?) comes to check your ticket. Joel takes a moment to take you in, to properly digest the view in front of him.

You were young - much younger than him - that was clear. You always wore big over the ear headphones and you always sat in the table seat across from his.

He notices your beaten up bag, he notices how you’re always either tapping away on your laptop, covered in stickers or writing furiously in a well-used notebook - also covered in stickers.

But mostly he notices how much of an effect you have on him. The tightening in his chest when you send a familiar smile towards him as you sit down. How you seep into his thoughts without warning or apology.

He begins to enjoy the endless journeys to and from work - because of you. Even though you don’t talk to him or even spare a glance in his direction that often, just being close to you does something to him.

Businessman!joel who has his own laptop (very plain, not covered in stickers) out each journey but finds himself doing less and less work, instead doing that thing where you look at the person across from you in their reflection in the window.

Businessman!joel who kind of freaks out the first time you come to mind when he masturbates. Just a flash of you, just enough to make him simultaneously feel very strange and very excited, but not so much that he loses his headspace. He continues, of course, and the first time he pictures you he keeps it fairly mild.

Fairly mild.

Just you sat on his lap, moaning sweetly as he leaves decided marks on your neck.

You pressed against the wall as the two of you lose yourselves in each other, kissing like it’s that last time you’ll ever get the chance to touch.

Just you laid out so pretty for him. Whining for more and more and more. Pretty eyes staring up at him as he thrusted into you, revelling in each pretty moan that slipped from your pretty mouth.

The next time Joel sees you in the train he feels guilty about the scenes that his mind conjured the night before. He knows he shouldn’t, but the moment he sees those lips he knows the fantasies will never end.

pls let me know if u want more :)

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Okay tbf it’s not technically christmas anymore but it was when i wrote the first bit so let’s just pretend :) also i am writing more businessman!joel but it’s taking my brain 5eva to think of it so please enjoy this <33

just because it’s christmas… BnBowner!joel and recentlysingle!reader who has already paid for a non-refundable trip for christmas. (apologies because i change from 3rd to 2nd person)

tw for cheating, a half second of nsfw(there will be more if i continue it) moments of angst, uncooperative suitcase, no use of y/n, not proofread

reader who just got broken up with who forgets they have a non-refundable trip booked in a cutesy cabin in a hallmark town, the “perfect place for couples” until they get an email confirming their arrival time and then all of a sudden the very real and very non-refundableness of the trip was brought to the forefront of their mind.

You aren’t quite sure if this is a good idea. But the last thing you were sure on ended up to be cheating on you for over a year, so maybe being unsure was a good thing.

The owner wasn’t lying when he said it was secluded, it was literally in the middle of nowhere. Perfect for a romantic getaway -hopefully also perfect for wallowing in your ruined relationship thanks to your piece of shit cheating ex-boyfriend.

You haul your suitcase up the snowy path towards the cabin, thankful that the cab was even able to make it this far, and for a moment you feel exactly like Amanda in the holiday and who knows? maybe you’ll meet an upsettingly handsome man. Maybe.

Probably not.

-

Joel watches from you from the porch for a little longer than he probably should before striding over to you, arm outstretched, ready to take your bags.

“Hey! i’m glad you found your way here, it’s not the easiest place to find.”

You look up from your uncooperative suitcase to lock eyes with perhaps the most attractive man you’ve ever seen (including Jude Law with glasses on) walking towards you and you’re so taken aback that you are definitely not prepared for your suitcase to start cooperating which in turn sends you flying into the snow.

Apart from it doesn’t, so you’re a little confused when you don’t hit the cold ground but are caught by a pair of warm, strong arms.

“Easy there, I’m happy you’re here too but you could’ve bought me a drink first.” Joel jokes as he sets you back on your feet.

“omg i’m so sorry it’s this stupid suitcase that refuses to move when i want it to i mean it i’m really sorry this is so embarrassing and i..” You trail off when you realise that Joel is in fact laughing. “what?”

“Nothing darlin’ you’re just the first person to apologise to me for the actions of an inanimate object, s’funny is all.” Joel holds out his hand for you to shake “incase you hadn’t figured it out, I’m Joel.”

You bashfully take it, pretending that hearing him call you ‘darlin’ hadn’t affected you in any way shape or form “Nice to meet Joel, you have a beautiful cabin, it really is magical.”

Joel’s hand is large, and warm, and a small part of you wants to feel more of his warmth. Maybe more than a small part.

He easily takes your bags the rest of the way, making light conversation with you, even though you’re still taking in him, responding with short answers and ‘hmms’.

He’s a rugged man, you think to yourself, he’s big all over, large frame, large hands. Your eyes dart towards his crotch for a moment wondering if he’s also large there. Something inside you tells you he is.

“Well here we are doll, let me know if you need anything” Joel puts your bags down just inside the door, the cabin really is the perfect place for a romantic getaway, you feel a pang with the knowledge that you specifically picked this place to spend time with your boyfriend. All you wanted to do now was forget about him, but apparently Joel could sense the singleness off you.

“Oh! where’s this boyfriend of yours, you did book for two, right?”

You freeze as he says ‘boyfriend’ debating whether it would be better to make up some elaborate lie or tell the miserable truth.

“We uh, we actually broke up a few days ago… turns out he’s not the kind of person i wanna go to a cabin with.” you eventually mumble out, followed by an unhappy laugh - mainly because you feel like you’ll cry otherwise.

“Aw shit darl, I’m sorry, and i know i’ve only known you all of five minutes but it’s definitely his loss.” A warm hand gently clasps onto your shoulder as Joel looks towards you with kind eyes.

You allow yourself to take the moment of sympathy from this kind stranger, before composing yourself.

“Thanks, Joel. I guess the only thing i need is directions to the nearest place that sells alcohol.”

“Of course doll,”

-

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                         horny

              horny      ^        horny

     horny               |                 horny

horny                   o ———->           horny

      horny                                 horny

            horny                   horny

                          horny

good heavens look at the time

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so rude that fantasizing about writing alone is not enough to actually get the fic done. you have to actually sit down and write it. insane.

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writing some more businessman!joel and also a separate ceo!joel thingy (bcs i <3 him) atm but it’ll take some time bcs of christmas and stuff, thanks for all the positive comments on my businessman!joel thingys <333333

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nvm i immediately fixed it (i am useless just sometimes)

i accidentally scheduled a post i was like a quarter through writing 😭😭 but i don’t know when it’s going to post 😭😭(help)

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i accidentally scheduled a post i was like a quarter through writing 😭😭 but i don’t know when it’s going to post 😭😭(help)

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i will write it properly,,, when i’m done with my uni work i promise 😭😭

more train crush businessman!joel thoughts bcs he has been /on/ my mind and also i have decided that businessman!joel is enamoured by the reader because that’s the kind of positivity i need rn (18+ MDNI(sorry for any mistakes xoxo))

businessman!joel who gets a promotion at work and definitely could just drive to work but continues to take the train and when a co-worker asks him about it he just mumbles something about ‘the price of parking these days’ ‘saving the environment’, knowing full well there is only one reason he’s taking the train

businessman!joel who can’t wait to see you on the train, can’t wait to see what you’re wearing, how you’ve done your hair. He just can’t wait to be near you.

businessman!joel who thinks of you in the early hours, as he strokes his cock lazily, imagining you kneeling between his legs, taking his length in your pretty mouth, imagines having you in the train bathroom, large calloused hand covering your whines as he thrusts up into you.

businessman!joel who watches you as you scribble something down in a well-used notebook, wondering what thought you deemed important enough to immediately note down, wondering what kind of things occupied your mind. For a moment he allowed himself to wonder if he occupied your mind as much as you occupied his.

businessman!joel who silently moves his businessman ™ backpack for you to sit next to him when the train is busier than usual. He’s trying his very hardest to act cool and casual when he smells you (someone pls free this man from his mind) and sees you up close.

commuter!reader who can’t believe their luck wh en they realise the only free seat is next to the man they’ve been drooling over ever since they first saw him sat across from them.

businessman!joel who almost short circuits when you ask him ‘d’you know why it’s so busy today?’ in a quiet voice almost making eye contact.

businessman!joel who leans into commuter!reader to answer even though he doesn’t really need to, but if it allows him to be closer to you even for a moment, he’ll take the opportunity.

And when joel does answer his voice is low and gruff ‘arts festival in town, supposed to last a week. Guess we’re stuck next to eachother for a while.’

And commuter!reader almost throws themselves on joel in that moment because he’s just so… dilfy, and how is commuter!reader supposed to cope with the salt and pepper hair /and/ the gruff but somehow honeyed voice /and/ the kind eyes!

neways… businessman!joel and commuter!reader apologies bcs drunk me is posting what (kinda) sober me wrote)

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seriously s2 roy kent is something i need biblically

biblically

rewatching ted lasso and s2 roy kent might be the sluttiest thing since ankles

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this is how i feel about 95% of the time

i’m 10 minutes into saltburn and i wanna fuck jacob elordi so bad

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more train crush businessman!joel thoughts bcs he has been /on/ my mind and also i have decided that businessman!joel is enamoured by the reader because that’s the kind of positivity i need rn (18+ MDNI(sorry for any mistakes xoxo))

businessman!joel who gets a promotion at work and definitely could just drive to work but continues to take the train and when a co-worker asks him about it he just mumbles something about ‘the price of parking these days’ ‘saving the environment’, knowing full well there is only one reason he’s taking the train

businessman!joel who can’t wait to see you on the train, can’t wait to see what you’re wearing, how you’ve done your hair. He just can’t wait to be near you.

businessman!joel who thinks of you in the early hours, as he strokes his cock lazily, imagining you kneeling between his legs, taking his length in your pretty mouth, imagines having you in the train bathroom, large calloused hand covering your whines as he thrusts up into you.

businessman!joel who watches you as you scribble something down in a well-used notebook, wondering what thought you deemed important enough to immediately note down, wondering what kind of things occupied your mind. For a moment he allowed himself to wonder if he occupied your mind as much as you occupied his.

businessman!joel who silently moves his businessman ™ backpack for you to sit next to him when the train is busier than usual. He’s trying his very hardest to act cool and casual when he smells you (someone pls free this man from his mind) and sees you up close.

commuter!reader who can’t believe their luck wh en they realise the only free seat is next to the man they’ve been drooling over ever since they first saw him sat across from them.

businessman!joel who almost short circuits when you ask him ‘d’you know why it’s so busy today?’ in a quiet voice almost making eye contact.

businessman!joel who leans into commuter!reader to answer even though he doesn’t really need to, but if it allows him to be closer to you even for a moment, he’ll take the opportunity.

And when joel does answer his voice is low and gruff ‘arts festival in town, supposed to last a week. Guess we’re stuck next to eachother for a while.’

And commuter!reader almost throws themselves on joel in that moment because he’s just so… dilfy, and how is commuter!reader supposed to cope with the salt and pepper hair /and/ the gruff but somehow honeyed voice /and/ the kind eyes!

neways… businessman!joel and commuter!reader apologies bcs drunk me is posting what (kinda) sober me wrote)

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rewatching ted lasso and s2 roy kent might be the sluttiest thing since ankles

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random thoughts that might not make sense bcs my brain is scrambled bcs it’s the end of term but basically i was on the train today and there was this total dilf across from me and it got me thinking about businessman!joel-

businessman!joel always sitting across from you, always on the same train, always the same, focused look on his face as he types away on his laptop.

businessman!joel who recognises you from the clockwork journeys to and from, to and from, notices how you also pick the same seat, headphones in, who notices all the times you glance over at him as he quietly admires you through your reflection in the window.

businessman!joel who only seems to wear perfectly pressed suits, sharp and clean, and a tie that he loosens with one hand, continuing to work with his other.

businessman!joel who gently wakes you up for your stop after you’ve fallen asleep after a particularly difficult day, a gentle touch on the shoulder and a gruff “don’t want you to miss your stop”

yea just businessman!joel as your train crush