desirousmuse

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PALM SPRINGS 2020 | dir. Max Barbakow

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tale as old as honey, a moment everybody knows History of Man (Maisie Peters) x The Prophecy (Taylor Swift)

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via spotify

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and for a fortnight there, we were forever

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t.s - the prophecy 🌙🖤

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Only when your girlish glow, flickers just so, do they let you know: It's hell on earth to be heavenly. Them's the breaks, they don't come gently. Clara Bow - The Tortured Poets Department (2024)

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all's fair in l o v e and p o e t r y.

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FLEABAG (2016—2019) cr. Phoebe Waller-Bridge

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NCUTI GATWA AND EMMA MACKEY Barbie (2023) dir. Greta Gerwig

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A lot of my posts from when I was younger and in my teenage angst years still get reblogged. Posts from when I was 18-24 and struggling with being a brown girl who just wanted to live her life without the pressure that comes from being the eldest in an immigrant family.

I am 29 now.

So much has changed and the things that I suffered through… my younger siblings no longer have to. The way I was never allowed to express myself through clothes or fashion, my sister does so without reservation. The way I was never allowed to have a social life and it severed many friendships (and brought forth a lot of anxiety and trauma that stems into my adult life), and now my sister is out everyday (whereas I still have PTSD and start having a panic attack if I am out too late and she waltzes in after 2/3 a.m all laadeedaa) The way my parents never supported me and showed up in the way I needed, my sister gets that. The way they used to tell me I would be married off by 23 or that I was expected to do all the housework and now my sister does shit all.

I suffered so she did not. Because my parents saw how badly it messed me up.

Of course, now I am the one in therapy and that is a surplus amount of issues in their own right but I am so glad that she does not have to jump the hoops that I had to. I now set boundaries with my family, advocate for myself and tell my family to get their shit together because I refuse to let them take my adulthood when my teenage and young adult years were snatched from me. And now? They listen. Because they KNOW. They realize. They UNDERSTAND.

So there is hope for all of you that still comment/reblog on all my posts because you relate to my brown girl woes. The woes have been woed. I believe you all. You got this. 🖤

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Ke Huy Quan wins the Oscar for Best Supporting Actor for Everything Everywhere All at Once 

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All my Buffynatural and Dean and Buffy (Duffy) fanfics. https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mythstaken/works

Been apart of the Buffynatural community for almost a decade — it is is nice to see it picking up on here finally.

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the midnights era red carpet looks

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Why are brown men (specifically brown fathers) so fucking angry all the time? You are the reason I never want to get married and am terrified of the remote possibility of ever being stuck with someone like you.

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This is my ‘hi I am alive’ post every 10 months when I log in, lol

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And you know damn well For you, I would ruin myself A million little times