depriscila

[depriscila]

they don’t know i’m already gone, my body just hasn’t left yet

[depriscila]

My blade/knife collection, excluding the stray ones I have hidden in my room. Stocked up on my favourite blades because they were on sale <3

[depriscila]

i just want to be held until i stop hurting. i want to feel safe, loved and protected. being alive hurts so much..

[depriscila]

existing and living are not the same

[depriscila]

[depriscila]

I HATE when people tell me "just forget about your trauma" or "just get over it" or even "just be happy".

Like, how?? I get flashbacks everyday and sometimes multiple times a day.

How can someone "forget trauma"?

How can someone "get over trauma"?

How can someone "just be happy" over trauma"?

LIKE, FUCKING HOW???

It really annoys me and VERY triggering too.

Does anyone else get annoyed and triggered by that statement?

[depriscila]

Until you live with bpd you'll never know what it's like to be too much and not enough at the same time.

[depriscila]

It feels like I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life

[depriscila]

[depriscila]

i never felt loved by my family which is why i always searched for it in the worst places because when you’re about to die of thirst, even a drop of poison tastes like heaven.

[depriscila]

[depriscila]

Blades ain't enough I need this

[depriscila]

A minha vida inteira eu fiz absolutamente apenas escolhas erradas, eu sou obcecada por escolhas ruins. Eu não sei pq eu tenho que me aguentar todos os dias, não sei pq eu não boto a cara e morro logo, não sei pq eu ainda tento.

[depriscila]

I could die so easily right now, in this moment

[depriscila]

How could you ever understand the anger I feel? My anger makes me crave blood and pain. I want to tear open my body and consume the blood pouring out. I need to feel something. Anything but anger. I've been angry for too fucking long. I'm going fucking insane.

[depriscila]

Life is torture.

I dont wanna exist anymore, i dont wanna get hurt over and over and over again. But why am i still trying to find love it is just pain. Just suffering. Just torture