demonprosecution

[demonprosecution]

wrightsideofthelaw replied to your post: “The Edgeworth-Wright Anything Agency–” “EDNA.” ...

:(

“You know what you have done and no amount of sad looks is going to garner you sympathy when someone is now drinking bleach, Wright.”

[demonprosecution]

“The Edgeworth-Wright Anything Agency--”

“EDNA.”

“The...Edna/Edgeworth-Wright Anything Agency is now closed until further notice. We will reopen when you all learn what is fit for human consumption. Go back to kindergarten.”

[demonprosecution]

wrightsideofthelaw replied to your post: "So, uh-- co-boss? I've noticed the other co-boss...

:/

“Now listen to me young man, I am talking directly into your ear now. I need you to do me a favor. You will do this for me. I need you to go to our house, and I need you to take Pess for a walk back here to the Agency. If you come back empty handed you’ll be in big trouble mister. You will never see the light of day.”

[demonprosecution]

"So, uh-- co-boss? I've noticed the other co-boss is a bit... out there." Mr. Edgeworth might wear a cravat and be adorned in ruffles, but at least he seems to have good sense apart from that. Mr. Wright, on the other hand, seems-- accident-prone, to put it mildly. "Anything I should, y'know, be on the lookout for with him?"

“Anything to be on the lookout for...?”

Hmm...Miles needs to think about that one. His husband is prone to eating paint, microwaving potatoes, filling a bathtub with Orbeez, getting harassed by the goose that is at their agency for some godforsaken reason, touting the pros of Comic Sans (despite the fact that there are none), doing a myriad of things which made Miles threaten to divorce him and then advertised for a divorce lawyer at their own agency and asked for a divorce cake, and consistently harassed his murderous ex-girlfriend.

“...There’s really not much. Just do be careful any time he’s near something inedible. He’s worse than our dog.”

[demonprosecution]

[ (looks at the current nahyuta & phoenix thread in addition to the fuckin potato thread) ahhh the duality of man. (me. i’m man.) ]

[demonprosecution]

wrightsideofthelaw‌:

…

…

…

“…science experiment?”

“Wright, you are quite possibly one of the stupidest people I know. Which is quite frankly concerning and amazing considering we also grew up with Larry Butz, but I digress. You attempted to microwave a potato--at work I might add--when you genuinely thought it could explode rather than seeking counsel from your husband who would tell you that all the microwave will do is heat it up. You also placed a potato in the freezer for--the only reason I could possibly assume--to see what would happen. And once again, I remind you, it would become cold. It is not water, Wright. It would not explode. If anything, it would shrink.”

He sighs heavily and uncrosses his arms. Looking Phoenix in the eyes with one of his signature glares, he steps very, very close.

“You are so goddamn stupid.”

And then he passionately kisses his husband.

[demonprosecution]

wrightsideofthelaw‌:

“Well, I didn’t want to do it at home in case it like, exploded? Klavier told me it might explode.” And the workplace is a better place to clean that up? “We never microwaved potatoes in elementary school, did we? I googled it and couldn’t find the answer, so I took matters into my own hands.”

And as for the other part…

“Er, you might not want to check the freezer, then.”

“Regardless of if we microwaved potatoes in school, you should have enough common sense to know that’s what a microwave DOES. And why are you listening to Klavier telling you things?? You know he likes to bully you-- And you could have simply asked me and I would tell you the answer!”

...

...

.

.

.

Miles turns, and opens the freezer.

“Wright, why is there a potato in the freezer.”

[demonprosecution]

wrightsideofthelaw‌:

“Well…” he looks at the notes he wrote down– that’s what makes it science.

“Put the potato in the microwave, turn it on, see what happens. That’s all I’ve got.”

“It...gets warm, Wright. That’s what a microwave does, it heats things up. This is like you telling me you decided to put a potato in the freezer because you wanted to know what would happen and what would happen is it would freeze. You passed basic elementary school science, Wright, I know this. You are not a complete moron. My next question is why are you doing this at the Agency??”

[demonprosecution]

wrightsideofthelaw‌:

“Science experiment.”

“...Might you enlighten me as to what this science experiment entails?”

[demonprosecution]

@wrightsideofthelaw​

“Wright why on earth is there a potato in the microwave. Were you microwaving potatoes. Why were you microwaving potatoes. Please answer me.”

[demonprosecution]

“I would let Wright make our wedding invitations, but I fear he would do them in comic sans...”

[demonprosecution]

ingoldentent‌:

“Edgeworth-san! Did a tornado pass by here?!”

Hmm...a tornado... Miles thinks about it quite seriously.

“Let me see...Nahyuta, Kazuma, and Edna were throwing papers at some point... I do believe the detectives all got in a fight... One of our interns was screaming about marriage for some reason... And it appears Edna has decided to become the new boss of the agency. But aside from that...no. I don’t believe there was a tornado.”

[demonprosecution]

“That is...probably for the best.”

At least until Miles and Phoenix renew their wedding vows, at least.

Cue Battler happily entering at the agency with pizza on his hands… only to be met with utter chaos and some vague thing about a divorce.

“I… think I’ll go home earlier today.”

[demonprosecution]

“Completely, utterly unrelated is anyone in this city qualified to renew wedding vows--”

[demonprosecution]

“I’m going to sign the divorce papers in fucking crayon, Wright. Because you’re sure acting childish enough.”

[demonprosecution]

"How many times must I divorce you until you learn your lesson?"

“I wonder what would happen if I filled up a bathtub with orbeez…..”

[demonprosecution]

A new form and option has been added to the Edgeworth-Wright Anything Agency! As our agency is now…very staffed (but always taking more applicants!), we are offering a specific form for case assistance, now located on our forms page!

Do you need a lawyer to help you with legal issues? A detective to investigate a mystery for you? A magician for whatever reason you need a magician? Edna? Then feel free to send in a request and one of our staff will be glad to help you with all your needs!

[ OOC: The new form is an optional (but not necessary!) avenue for plotting threads! If there is someone from the agency you would like to plot a case thread with, feel free to request them (and please probably get in touch with them via their preferred means of contact as well) on the blog as sort of formality for threading purposes! ]

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