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We looked inside some of the posts by dekuofficial and here's what we found interesting.
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Notes Per Post
16
Likes Per Post
15
Reblog Per Post
0
Reply Per Post
1
Time Between Posts
6 days
Number of Posts By Type
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17
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i cant sleep i feel like im gonna throw up
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idk why i ever expect to have good mental health during may, when its my least favorite month
#little moth spotted#i always lie and tell people its my favorite month but its not i hate celebrating my birthday and i hate having to always mask#and i hate being alive so much why do i have to be alive when i hate it so much im doing so bad all the time and i have to act like im not!!#i relapsed self harm a couple days ago it was awful but i cant fuckimg tell anyone because what do i even say?????#i started hurtimg myself again feel sorry for me pity me god i wish i could vent to someone im so tired of bottling shit up#but im so fuckimg ashamed of myself i wish i would just drop dead i wish si badly i didny have to keep going im so tired#people say they care but even if i wasnt there they can go about their lives like usual so it wojdlnt even matter what happened to me#im just so fuckimg tired
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it is officially bug month!!! (a whole month dedicated to me and my birth) happy bug month!!!
#little moth spotted#not really obviously lol i just like keeping up with this very silly joke i started years ago ^^;#anyways i hope everyone has a good may cuz like yikes we really need a win rn everything is stressing me out and i can barely afford therapy#rn like its crazy how expensive it is just to exist and live 馃拃#also my new QPP has been having major friend issues with a mutual fren and i need alone time with milky to yap more aggressively#like no shade to my beloved QPP but she is so soft on that mutual fren its killing me i hope when they actually get to talk it out#she's much more firm with him#anyway done yapping lol its been a minute cuz im been majorly stressed out about finances but what can ya do sigh living is costly 馃様#im not even tired but i should eep so i can reschedule :') that appointment bright and early tomorrow#then spend the rest of the day anxious about it#i hate anxiety so much lol ^^; its so irrational even about things i've done a million times
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i hate shark week man, it always makes me feel horrible and emotional and sad for no reason ugh
#little moth spotted#i wish someone would take care of me but :( no one ever keeps me company for as long as i want#and i cant ask for attention cuz i dont want to bother anyone so i just go lay in bed and mope#i hate the way shark week makes me feel so gross and icky in every way possible
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feeling like a gross emotional monster everytime i don't feel mentally well really sucks lmao
#little moth spotted#i cant even ask anyone for reassurance that they still love me and i'm not secretly hated because i believe im loveable#im sure everyone just puts up with me because they think im sad and pathetic like i know they exclude me all the time so what's to say they#dont secretly hate me and just keep me around for no reason#if i stop talkimg to my friends i dont think they'd ever talk to me again
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feeling very overstimulated tonight ;;
#little moth spotted#i think its cuz im so overtired but it could also be cuz i have been spending a lot of time doing stuff with frens with no bug only time#hopefully sleep helps me feel better lol
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i am once again plagued by tummy ache for no reason because of my chronic stomach issues wahhh its been hurty all day and i feel nauseous;;
#little moth spotted#i'm use to stomach pain but ughhh it's so bad today that i basically couldn't do anything and its not even shark week!!!! wtf dude ughhhh
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you ever have those days where you're really needy and feel like clinging to your partner like a small child for reassurance and affection? haha no? me either,,,,,, :')
#little moth spotted#im not really feeling mentally unwell i am just a litol tired and stressed lately and i feel like i have barely gotten enough affection from#my beloved partner but they have a full time job and i hate bothering them when i know they're busy and stressed even tho i know they would#just happily give me all the love i desire willingly and without complaint because they like feeling needed but wahhh idk i miss them#its hard being long distance i wanna cuddle them irl so badly wahhhh qwq
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i've been so hecking tired i keep going to be early only to wake up early and repeat the horrible cycle of going to bed early the next day sigh
#little moth spotted#i'm on a new antidepressant and idk if that's the reason i'm so tired or because i'm just more stressed and thats making me more tired???#its not a big deal but god i am so tired all the time lately and i just wanna feel rested so bad
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my mom's kitten got on my shelf knocked a bunch of stuff down and broke one of my miku figures and i am devastated to say the least
#little moth spotted#i am trying so hard to be okay about it because she is a cat and does not know any better and its not like she meant it#but god it is an understatment to say miku and my figures of her are so very important to me i worked so hard to find the one she broke#like the figure is fixable but idk it'll never be the same and i'll look at her and think about how sad i am she was broken#even after she gets fixed hhhhh anyway i'm being overly emotional for no reason like she's fixable i'm just really sad about it lol
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i am havung a mini panic attack and wowie i am so stressed abkut eveything all of yhe time
#little moth spotted#yeah idk but it sure is happening to me rn#my chesg hurts and breathing is hard having yhese alome is so scary omg
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on my hands and knees devastated that i cannot but the shadow milk cookie plush
#little moth spotted#you do not understand my mental state is so fragile rn and knowing i cant have that little guy i love so much is beyond devastating#fuck literally gonna cry over a stupid plushie why am i like this lmao i'm such a freak
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my dumb idiot brain cannot contain my gay heart sigh
#little moth spotted#i miss my partner :') we hungout yesterday but still ajhddjkw i miss them wahhh and they have plans all day#so i'll only get to see them again tomorrow sighhhh i'm going to waste away here!!!
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:( once again i am stupid and should have just asked instead of assumed ughhhh
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the fact that as a human i can't just scratch my claws against a large tree or scratching post like a big cat to maintain them is awful,,,,,
#little moth spotted#i hate clipping my nails its so time consuming and my hands are so shakey sometimes i accidentally cut them too short so it's uncomfortable#i wish i could just do a big cat stretch and scratch up a tree or smth instead sighhhh
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ughhh shark week is kicking my ass :'( my tummy is so hurty and i can't turn up the heating pad anymore its maxed out sobbing,,,,,,,,
#little moth spotted#pain stuff barely helps me as well ugh its the worst qwq at least its snowing real bad so i don't have to grocery shop today sigh#my kins don't deserve my period cramps so i'm forcing them onto my partner's kins#sorry kacchan but i'm in so much pain i can barely move and i'm so nauseous i cant eat so you're gonna take all my pain#and make me feel better qwq pls i'm so hurty waahhh tummy hurts so bad
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hmmm do i go to bed early (doomscroll), keep gaming at my computer, or is it floor time? so many options, and so much time to waste sigh
#little moth spotted#its been a minute since i posted lol#anyway i got abandoned and all my friends are busy and honestly its just making me kinda sad and tired so i might just go to bed early lol#or play DR1 on my switch or smth idk im tired enough that sounds like the superior option#:') its my comfort series ngl
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