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Ive said this before but swear the biggest skill to learn as an adult is how to resist high-pressure sales tactics. You do NOT have to answer questions with anything other than "Sorry I'm not interested." No matter how nice they are or no matter how many follow up questions they ask or even how agitated they get when you stand your ground. Just keep saying I'm not interested. Don't answer their questions. Don't give them an opening to try to push back on your reasons. Be a fucking brick wall of I'm not interested.

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This article title made me laugh so hard for being so absolutely savage

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Hey i’s me. Monkey Overwatch. Hope you all had a lovely summer. Your dad loves you. Your dad loves you so fucking much. please return my texts. Enjoy the burger i sent you in the mail.

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joining discord servers for local groups rules. sometimes someone will be like "i'm trying to make some more room in my garage :/ maybe a long shot but is anyone interested in several chests full of gold dubloons, precious gemstones, etc"

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instead of worrying abt whether or not yr scaring the hoes y dont u find some hoes that dont get scared, brave hoes. indomitable hoes

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Gotta love the British press.

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Can I get awesomesauce on my nothingburger

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A gray alien has slipped and hit his head on the corner of the freezer box thing at 7/11

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my son got all A’s in school so i got him a happy meal

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shut up and look at this photo of Marsha P. Johnson smiling and holding a Snoopy plush.

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obsessed with the girl who says that if you lie on the floor long enough you will start to cry and shake because your body is 'releasing excess cortisol' like i just think you might be going through something girl

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THIS IS KILLING ME

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i feel strongly about this