deathgasmic

[deathgasmic]

if i were the virgin mary i'd be pisseddddd. imagine not even getting the fun part of getting pregnant and then "oh yeah, you're giving birth to god's baby, surprise!"

[deathgasmic]

i smoke a lot of weed and have a lot of trauma don’t expect me to remember anything ever

[deathgasmic]

i volunteered at a light show tonight and the space they had me working in had a tree in the way so all i could see from the "happy holidays" sign was "happy ho"

[deathgasmic]

i love how in zombie movies they'll be like years and years into the apocalypse and still having kids. personally, if i were living in the apocalypse and i found out i was pregnant that would be the thing to put me on the show snapped

[deathgasmic]

[deathgasmic]

pet play but it's you putting me down

[deathgasmic]

[deathgasmic]

remember to live laugh limp bizkit today

[deathgasmic]

absolutely not

[deathgasmic]

almost got hit like three times just in a 20 minute drive home pls you all know we get snowstorms every winter

[deathgasmic]

i have no reason to act like mikey milkovich, i just do

i'm like a deadbeat dad if he was a woman in his 20's

[deathgasmic]

i'm like a deadbeat dad if he was a woman in his 20's

[deathgasmic]

Happy 52nd birthday that year 🥳🥳🥳🥳

omg thank you you're the first to say it 🙏🏻

[deathgasmic]

What's happening in 2052?

lmaooo i'm talking about the movie but that's the year i'll turn 52 so that's something i guess

[deathgasmic]

Where do I want you to cum? To your senses motherfucker

[deathgasmic]

i'm so fucking excited for 28 years later

[deathgasmic]