dear-claire-bear

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

I am cold.  Rachel is cold.  Everything is cold.  Also, I forgot to tell you I got the first scissor injury of my life!  I was weatherproofing our front door and as I was cutting the foam to fit I cut my finger.  I cut it with the tip of the scissors.  I cut a V into my finger and bit bled a lot more than I thought it would.  So Rachel out a bandaid cast on it and it’s making it really hard to type... oh and of course it’s the tip of my pointer finger on my left hand.  It was super fun.

Anywho, have so much shit to do today... Butttttt Rachel and I are going to make a blanket fort and watch TV all day.

Also, I miss you a lot and want to hang out with you! Either I need to come to you or you come to me... I wish you skied.  My family is going to a ski resort up north.  I have never been skiing and I’m gunna learn!

Anywho, I’m rambling.  I miss you and want to see you and I hope you stay warm in this crazy, crazy weather!

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

My life is a mess

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

These two are about the only ones the really keep the loneliness at bay

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

Do you ever just feel so restless that you just want to implode?

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

I got a new phone. It took forever as the apple store is super slow and the WiFi at home is super poopy so I couldn’t backup my phone.

Anywho, apparently one of my dads former co-workers is head hunting me! It’s kind of exciting and I have to send her my resume and cover letter. I also got further with Under Armour. I have to send them a video of me answering questions.

I think I may need to go on medication for the SAD. The light hurts my eyes but I guess I can keep trying it. I broke down crying after 😉😏 because for some reason it just released all the built up stress in me. C says I can talk to him about things but I just feel so bad putting things in people. People have so much of their own stress they don’t need me adding my stress to theirs. I just feel like I should be there for others and helping them with their stress not putting my stress on them.

I feel like I haven’t been writing to you as much as I was or should be. I feel like I have so much going on when it really isn’t. I guess it’s because everything seems to stress me out on some level.

God I really need to get this under control...

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

This is going to be a shorter post but I feel I should tell you the story about my sandwich today. 

It was a snowy Thursday, mid-November.  As I sat at the table eating my french toast sticks and drinking tea I wonder what I should make myself for lunch.  I ask Rachel and she says she has enjoyed the turkey sandwiches she had been making herself the past few days.  I decide to follow suit and make myself one as well. 

Now some background, I have been surviving off of trail mix and a banana for lunch for the past 3 days now so this was a much-needed change in meal.

In preparation to construct my soon to be masterpiece, I take the bread out of the freezer and place it in the toaster oven to defrost putting it on the lowest setting.  I go back to sitting at the table, sipping my tea, chatting with Nick (who had spent the night).  Eventually, Rachel says, ”Josie, your toast is burnt”.  So I spring up and pull my now toast out of the toaster and much to my dismay it was indeed burnt, like black burnt. 

Now, being the poor college student I am, I had no choice but to accept my fair and make a sandwich with to burnt pieces of bread.  So I put the “bread” in the fridge for a few minutes to cool it down.  I then take it out and make my turkey, cheese and mayo sandwich and packed it in my lunch with my trail mix and banana.

Fast forward to lunchtime and I bring out my hardened bread sandwich.  Lemme tell you.  The main thing I tasted when I bit it to that sandwich was not the turkey or the cheese or the mayo or even the burnt bread.  Oh no. The main ingredient was PAIN!  PAIN in my mouth from having burnt as bread SCRAPE the top of my mouth! I could not even bite all the way through.  I had to semi tear my bites off.

In conclusion, do not make a sandwich with two pieces of toast.  It will hurt and you will regret it.

Thank you for reading.

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

I have gotten to the point in the semester where my brain wants to do anything but work. It would rather sit and do nothing. It’s making it increasingly hard to focus on work and school work. And it probably doesn’t help that I wake up tired every morning. I haven’t been able to sleep in in some time now. This has just been such a busy month. I need a break. I wish my school had a fall break.

I’m also freaking out about my graphic design assignment. I have no clue what band to do and what the poster would even look like!! Also I hate my French class. Absolutely hate it.

On the other had it was super great seeing you yesterday and I’m glad you got to meet the kitties!!! I am also excited that you like the foam pad, it’s super comfy and really made my bed the past two years very nice.

I look forward to the next chapter of your story!!! I know it will be amazing just like you are!!! I hope I get to see you again soon and that you have a great week!!!!

Lots of Love,

J ❤️

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

I have no classes today!  My Tuesday and Thursday classes are both in the same room but he’s out of town so I have no class!!!

I miss you a lot!! It feels like an eternity since I have seen you last.  We need to see each other sometime soon. 

Lots of love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

I am so sorry I haven’t written to you in a while.  Life has been so busy and I feel like I have had the busiest week of my life.  I have SOOOO much to tell you so I will try to cover it all!

Firstly, my new job.  So I just finished training.  I was weird, the training was all online and I got to go at my own pace.  I finished on Monday and was given my first course to remediate on Friday.  I am super excited and It’s funny that my first course is “Intro to Wine”!!! So I get to go through a bunch of material on wine!! I’m almost done with it but I may have to go in and hand caption some things which won’t be fun.  I really can’t wait to be paid tho but I think I have to wait another 2 weeks :(   I WANT MY MONEY!! I’M POOR!!

Another thing that happened to me this week is I went to a job fair at the Engineering college and by some miracle got job interviews with FCA (Chrysler) and Ford.  I was so nervous before the interviews and my parents had to give me so much coaching.  I also had to go out and buy dress pants.   Girl.  I am so short.  I bought pants that are like the shorter size.   AND THEY WERE STILL TOO LONG!!!  THe struggle.  Anywho, I am waiting to see if either of the companies want to hire me and I need to look at other internships for the summer. 

My classes are going okay.  I had to skype with someone in French which was horrible and I have to write a transcript for it!!!!  I have two projects dues this week and have to present a third.  So we will see how it all goes. I’m stressed as usual.

I miss you so much! I would love for you to come and see the house and I would love to see your dorm room!! I hope you had a good weekend and have a great week ahead of you!!!

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

You are away at camp and that makes me sad.  I miss you.  A lot.  I want to do things with you like go shopping but you are oh so far away.  I wrote to you tho, just like I said I would.  I’m hoping you get the letter otherwise, I will have lost all faith in USPS and my ability to correctly address envelopes.

On another note, I think I don’t drink enough water.  I keep getting really bad headaches.  Like today my headache started around 1 PM and has lasted until 10:30... I took two Ibuprofen at work which helped a little but my headache actually got worse after that.  Like I felt sick it was so bad.  it probably didn’t help that I ate an entire small pizza (I have zero self-control).  So, after talking three Excedrin it has finally gone away but will probably be back later.  I guess I just need to drink a ton more water. or I have a serious health issue.  

In other news, I will be getting the key to my house on Friday!! I am super excited! Tho we still need to get all the utilities in our name.  But still, it will be cool to finally have the keys.  I really want to do a MTV Cribs style video because I’m lame like that.  You should come up and see the house when you get back.  Maybe help me move in a little.  I put in my last day as the 16th so I am finally free from that wretched place after that!!

I miss you and am looking forward to your return!!

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

I had a great trip t I have so much going through my head right now. I feel off in some way and I know know why and I don’t know how to explain it. I also feel like I have so much emotion trapped inside me that I could cry.

I think I have post vacation blues and I think it’s from spending so much time with people I never get to see and you never really how much you miss someone until you see them in person.

I missed you too tho. I haven’t seen you in a while and we need to talk!!! I can’t wait to see you tomorrow!!

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

Love is a personal journey. Dating should be in your own terms and something that you enjoy. Not something you fear or dread or makes you uncomfortable. Yes you will have bad experiences with dating but if you can avoid distasteful before it happens that’s a good thing. You know what’s best for you so don’t let others try and tell you different. You should not feel bad for saying no to people. You don’t own anyone a yes if you don’t want to say yes. Your dating life is your choice and I respect that. You just can’t help it that you’re so damn attractive and have to turn do many guys down (it’s a gift and a curse ���).

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

I know I’m a little late but I would like to thank you for having me over for dinner.  It was delicious and now I am regretting not taking some to go. It was also great spending the evening with you and getting to see your doggos again!!  I really do spending time with you, you are such a great friend and sometimes I do feel like we are the same person!!

Also, just found a Harry Potter marathon on TV (USA and SFY)!!!  It’s gunne be a good day!! getting my nails done, my hair cut, watching a Harry Potter Marathnon!!!! I hope you have a good day as well! 

Lots of love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

I rewatched three of the Twilight movies the other week. My love for Taylor Lautner has been rekindled.

#teamjacob

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

Do you ever wonder what the purpose of everything is?  Or think about how we kinda have a set path in life?  We go to school, get a job, retire, then die.  Like most people conform to that general structure.  We don’t see much variation.

Do you also ever think about how we glorify people who are singers and actors because they are good at what they do but we don’t do that for people in other fields of work.  We don’t fangirl over really skilled doctors or really good teachers.  We live in such a weird world where we put these people up on their pedestals and then make them untouchable.  Like they can do no wrong, the rules that govern normal people don’t apply to them and we as the public say that’s okay.  

I don’t know why I’m typing this.  It’s kinda just what goes through my head sometimes and I never really talk about it with anyone.  It’s one of those things you observe but never talk about.  The world changes and society changes and we say change is slow but we see it in each and every generation.  Change can be good or bad but I feel some of the changes we have seen lately have been towards the bad.  I want the world to be hugs and rainbows but I know it never will be.  People have too much hate and bad in them for the world to be without conflict.  

Maybe life is short because if it were longer we would not be able to handle all the hate we would witness.

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

When we got home the house was a mess.  One of Dad’s nice bikes was in the front yard and Mom’s guitar was on the deck.  people had been in every single room in the house. Everything was moved and every pot and pan had been used.  We still can’t find some things. It was clear after looking around that people had been living in the house for the entire week.  People had been sleeping in every single one of our beds and on the vouches.  They got into my college stuff that was stored upstairs and used EVERY SINGLE ONE OF MY BLANKETS! They even watched War Horse on the TV in my room.  We are all pissed and I don’t know what will happen next... anyways.

Lots of Love,

J

[dear-claire-bear]

Dear Claire,

This vacation was so amazing with you along.  You are such a joy to be around and someone I love talking to.  I hope you had a great time as I did and enjoyed the wonders of Canada.  Thought you snore in the car you are a great travel buddy and I appreciate you braiding my hair so much!!  I am so bad at it and I really appreciate you.  

Anywho, thank you again for coming.  I love you. We shall hang out soon and as always I will see you at work!

Lots of Love,

J