dcvilgrams-icquotes

[dcvilgrams-icquotes]

[dcvilgrams-icquotes]

[dcvilgrams-icquotes]

[dcvilgrams-icquotes]

Are you trapped on tumblr right now?

Is there something you planned to do before you got trapped in the endless tumblr scroll?

Are you yelling at yourself to get up and do the thing, but you can’t, because you’re trapped in the endless tumblr scroll?

Consider this your save point.

Put tumblr down, stand up, stretch, and go do the thing you planned to do. Future you will be incredibly grateful.

[dcvilgrams-icquotes]

Miscellaneous Dialogue Prompts

“Whatever possessed you to do that should possess you more often.”

“Okay, what did I do?” “What do you mean?’ “You look like you want to rip my head off.” “Sorry, that’s just how my face works.”

“I have a solution.” “Thank goodness.” “It involves fire.” “Absolutely not.”

“This way is more efficient.” “This way is going to get us killed.”

“You scared me!” “Well, I am naturally terrifying.”

“You really think this is a smart idea?” “Nope.” “Good. I’d be concerned if you did.”

“I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.”

“Is that blood?” “No?” “That’s not a question you’re supposed to answer with another question.”

“I’m pretty sure it was a ghost.” “I’m pretty sure it’s not.” “Oh, really?” “Ghosts don’t bleed.”

“I have to take credit for this.” “I think you mean ‘blame.’”

“Sorry I’m not reacting to this news with appropriate excitement, I’m really hungry.”

“Are you clinically insane or just incredibly annoying?” “I don’t know, probably both.”

“Should we do something?” “You mean besides laugh?”

“Will you be quiet?!” “I didn’t say anything!” “Well stop thinking so loud!”

“Just… take a deep breath or something!” “TAKE A DEEP BREATH?! It feels like my insides are being RIPPED OUT!”

“I don’t like saying ‘I told you so,’ but—” “The hell you don’t, it’s your favorite phrase.”

“You’re an idiot. I’m an idiot. We’re the co-presidents of Club Idiot.”

“What’s our exit strategy?” “Our what?” “Oh my god, we’re gonna die.”

“I’m trying to have a serious conversation with you!” “And I’m trying to subtly avoid it!”

“We play dumb, but I swear we know exactly what we’re doing.”

“It’s charming!” “It’s probably haunted and we’re all gonna die.”

“I know there was a compliment somewhere in there, and I’ll take it.” “You piece of shit.” “Ah, there it is!”

“I’m personally offended that you didn’t ask me to be your fake date!”

“Are you sober?” “I’m… moderately functional.” “I’ll take that as a no.”

“Please be quiet. I can’t even hear myself losing the will to live.”

“I would call you an imbecile but that’d be cruel as you wouldn’t be able to spell it.”

“Not everything has to be an argument, you know.” “Yes, but I can tell you that you’re wrong in seven different languages, which gives me the advantage.”

“If we die, I’m gonna spend the rest of our afterlives reminding you that this was all your fault.” “That’s cool, I wouldn’t mind having company while being a ghost.”

“How do we keep getting into these situations?” “[#] years of friendship and I still don’t know.”

“Are you there?” “Physically, yes. Mentally, debatable.”

“You are the least subtle person I know. Your ‘I have a secret’ vibe is literally visible from the moon.”

“Can you hit him with your knife?” “I believe the technical term is ‘stab.’”

“Wanna see what kind of trouble we can get into?” “Oh god, we’re gonna die, aren’t we?” “It’s a Tuesday, I know how to restrain myself.” “You absolutely do not.”

“Whatever it is, I didn’t do it.” “You always say that, and I never believe you.”

“Are you sure I can’t punch him in the face?” “Yes.” “What if I just break his nose a little?”

“I already did my part. If you need anything, ask anyone but me.”

“Can you please go be stupid somewhere that’s far away from me?”

“I had a thought.” “Oh no…” “I swear it’s a good one this time!”

“Don’t mind me, I’ll just be in the corner having another existential crisis.”

“On a scale from one to ten, how bad do you think it would be if—” “At least a twenty.”

“A is for organization.” “According to what alphabet?”

“When this is all over, I want my sanity back.”

“Oh my god, I had the exact same dream!” “Really?” “Are you nuts? Of course I didn’t.”

“So what’s your plan?” “My plan is to follow your plan!”

“This is gonna end in disaster.” “That’s surprisingly optimistic.”

“Unfortunately, there’s no way we can do this.” “Fortunately, you’re wrong.”

“All I know is— one of us is right, and the other one is you.”

“If you tell me again that we can’t do this, I’m gonna kick you somewhere you’re not gonna enjoy.”

“It doesn’t work like that.” “It does now.”

“If you do that again, I’ll throw you out that fucking window you— what are you doing?” “Checking how high the drop is, to see if it’s worth it.”

“Are you even listening to me?” “Yea, it just takes me a whole to process so much stupid all at once.”

“The real treasures were the memories we made along the way.” “I almost died!” “Ah yes, that was indeed a memory.”

“Now that I made it weird, I’m going to make my exit.”

“I’m bitter and complicated. It’s one of my charms.” “I don’t think you know what that word means. Or how to count.”

“Where is the idiot, anyway?” “I’m right here.” “Surprisingly enough, I’m not talking about you this time.”

“Look, if you want to conjure some demon spawn from the great beyond, that’s all fine and dandy. Just wait for me to leave before you start.”

“Nah.” “Don’t you ‘nah’ me!”

“I believe that was the very think I told you not to do.” “Did you really think I’d listen?”

“Well, if you’d woken up properly the first time I kicked you, I wouldn’t have had to do it four more times.”

“… Just to be sure we’re all on the same page.” “Page? We’re not even in the same library!”

“We can’t have a crisis — my schedule is already booked full.”

“I have a plan.” “Is it a good plan?” “I have a plan!”

“The universe just loves proving me wrong, doesn’t it?”

“I suppose I could forgive you.” “Now, or in ten years?” “I don’t quite know yet.”

“Did you see that?” “Um…” “The correct answer is no, no you didn’t. Now walk faster.”

“I would like to join you in acknowledging the difficulties of your life.” “You are the worst at this ‘comfort’ thing.”

“Sorry, I spout out random facts when I’m nervous.”

“You are all remarkably well-behaved tonight… What did you do?”

“That’s not a happy story.” “Well I don’t live a happy life.”

“You have to listen to reason!” “But reason is boring!”

“Trust me, I was an extremely irritating child.”

“I need to go de-stress.” “Where are you going?” “To demolish something— probably the living room.”