dawnlune

[dawnlune]

Self change is scarrrrry especially when you use to have a different way of thinking and seeing things.

I’m working on rebuilding a new perspective.

It’s kinda scary to trust people and over and over there’s always a reason why I never should have…

Lately I trust and I believe I strongly believe there’s a reason why things happen. Even when people do things wrong or whatever. I learn about something even if it really messed up my inner world I’m learning something out of the situation.

When I was younger I was okay with solitude since I was often a target for laughter especially for having glasses, I learned it was best to hang alone under the stairs, in dark hallways jumping over fences without permission at school just to hang further away alone and omg no one noticed I was hanging in the grassy area 😂 I was so odd .. with my mp3 and some headphones heck even my sandwich.

I’m more aware of myself today and I would’ve told the version of myself to believe even if you feel hopeless and like a lost soul you honeslty arnt , to close your eyes and feel the air , relax and smell the breeze, not just sit there and stress out. I would say it’s okay to feel super anxious about the PTSD stuff like stop saying “I wish I can die rn.” It’s actually okay to feel shame guilt and anger . It was okay to want to cry it was okay to feel like running is the only solution to this which bled into my other areas in life like conflicts , people who actually cared..

I never thought that looking back was possible without a knot stuck in my stomach. I’m just excited about life bad or good , good or bad. I want to feel life and still be grounded. I want to work hard on my future projects and still breathe. High school me has resurfaced to my view. And I didn’t really feel like I was really inside myself and all I feel is bad for that person like I was so harsh on myself for no reason and I ran away from good people just as much as bad people. I wasn’t trying to make friends… i wanted to keep myself away from harm and people and really just escape my thoughts with loud music and creativity, and climbing trees , and climbing roof tops and jumping fences and one time driving a car that wasn’t mine when someone left the keys inside and it was there alone. I brought it back like 10 minutes after and laughed about it. I snuck away from teachers who loved me and those who hated me because I hated staying on a seat for 2 hrs doing nada.

Like I could go walk around and then walk home. I went to jack in the box 😂, I frikin went to the plushies store and looked around. I tried buying a parrot once on my walk. Damn I needed to be stopped ngl I needed to be told to get home and do my hw but I honestly finished that in the mornings … alright I was a loner with a strange way to rebel. I wasn’t doing bad stuff I was just trying to be a free little kid who didn’t feel okay at all.. and I’m not even disappointed at myself my mom was mad many times she even chased me down once caught me and tried not to be my enemy to get me to stop being this way.

I did stop but I was miserable. I even got a random promotion by my counselor to be her office assistant because to her I was a bright girl , trustworthy , who needs to make more friends and smile more. I wasn’t so comfortable but hey i gave blue slips out why not? I can sign myself out and use the door for once😂 and no I didn’t abuse the power because people assumed I was going to give free blue slips to leave and I can’t believe I followed the rules. I guess this helped me out so much. I started thinking I was capable of talking.

Parents talked to me so that students can leave early , I input information on the computer, I managed lots of confidential informational work in the office that my supervisor was proud of me. This helped me so much I started to see that maybe I can be someone but maybe not? Suddenly I started looking at change 2020 😊 like I didn’t imagine myself ever being enough somewhere or even helpful. I felt happy teachers were super cool with me. And my mom was super happy too.. my sibling laughed at me like out of anyone “this quiet sarcastic goof gets to be an office assistant at school what in the world?” I even started looking into my make up career in spfx but blahhhhhhh there was a strike the next year within my career it messed it up tbh then there was a merge of competitors etc it got slow and I kinda got exhausted with so much moving I had to get a second job away from home and coffee was a temporary deal !!! 😎

2024 was so patient I liked the planning and slowly moving through the year it wasn’t a year of blasting work even if I wanted it to be but at least I was able to plan a new sketch for my life. I saw so much of what I needed to work on especially my Attachment style.

I’m working on this & I just have hope because younger me me felt like I’d never be important, I’d never be someone, I’d never accomplish anything I just wasn’t going to be good enough in anything I did..

But what the heck? That’s not true. I can see my reprogramming has been awesome since my counselor pushed me to see I can do something good instead of jumping fences and running away from authority figures. I really just didn’t want to be watching teachers typing for 2 hours I was BORED out of my mind !!!!!! I did be sneaking out and running away 😭😂. My white converse shoes often ripped because of this!

I laugh at this now like how was I a quiet kid who stayed out of trouble but also did things like that? But I didn’t do stuff that would cause me more trouble just enough to feel a little alive like eating a burger after running away. 😂 reading a book by the little lake someone made in a meadow. Climbing the roof top not to tag or her high like my friend Selena but just to watch the sky alone. And get lost with music. Who was this kid ? 😂😂 I kinda need to be a little of her more again cus sometimes I be staying in for too long instead of exploring new mountains 🏔️ but I don’t need trouble at all literally like being in the shadows 😂 working on something and getting it done .

Like becoming a responsible adult hehe :) I’m getting there it’s tricky sometimes but I have confidence that I’ll be who I aspire to be :D I’m just excited about life again there’s no specific reason I just want to feel that feeling when I finished high school and I was free to own my own time and work on my ideas. New year? New goals to squash hehe :😉 … younger me gives me inspiration to take a leap into the unknown like that kid was broken but brave and I wanna remember that always and forever. Photograph from 2019

[dawnlune]

Sailor Neptune

(PISCES ♓️)

( Sailor Neptune 🙃 is a fav because she’s so dreamy & Awesome🥰)

Pisces is ruled by Neptune , rules over the 12th house & owns the 12th & 24th degrees in astrology

My take on Pisces ♓️

When balanced this sign speaks about. Art , Dreams , love , soulmates , karmic love ,natural mysticism vibes, luck , fortune, theatre , acting , film, spiritual experiences , spiritual healers , light seekers, creators,fashion design , the most intuitive individuals, music creators ,writers, singers , artists & the main sign of naturally creative talented individuals as a well as very energetically in tune to feelings & highly empathic.

People with lots of Pisces placements sun , moon , Venus or rising or any strong Neptune influences makes people fall into a dream state for them. Why? Because they have soft but strong healing aura (NEPTUNE IS ALL ABOUT THAT) energy in fact Pisces is the most healing sign of all when balanced and no need to ever feel weird for being a deep soul of course it’s important to balance out your deep emotions by :D crying , showing yourself some love , treating your love and energy with respect and mindfulness and really grounding yourself hey try looking for your earth friends for some help with grounding since earth will bring you back to earth hehe …

These individuals have a multi thousands of outputs to art and creations. They have so much creativity you can’t even understand how someone can do make up , bake , draw , and paint and so on ! They are amazing individuals when balanced they have something about them very very similar to SCORPIO energy :O. Only these people are like angels ( as in different to Scorpio Scorpio energy causes the same magical allure but it’s more like vampire energy like “dangerous but sexy energy” tbh Pisces is very divine feminine energy this energy attracts people to you in a soulmate way like people really enjoy your fairytale energy if you have Neptune energy your very dreamy and the ideal boyfriend or girlfriend, people can’t get enough of you , your intoxicating and naturally sweet and beautiful even if your a man with lots of Neptune like Justin Bieber is an example ..

But people can tend to put pieces (Neptune) placements on a pedestal until pieces placements don’t accept an offer and so on .. which can cause people to obsessed over you even more , day dream about you , dream about you , wish for you and so on .. be careful 🙂 I’m a Venus in Pisces (thank god it has a Taurus degree & is in a Saturn home) but just be careful if you have Pisces placements definitely gonna add Venus on here because it is a super awesome “lucky and powerful placement to own” but it can sincerely attract narcissists, abusive individuals etc due to you being selfless, giving , loving and always being the person who “fixes everything for people” your also the types to heal with your love like I know this personally with old friends I don’t talk to I often listened to issues that caused me lots of harm but I always thought I had to stick by even if it meant I was being someone’s trash Bag for their anger issues . Find gentle people & music it really helps you feel better heck shower all day everyday 🤣 that’s what I do to feel better sometimes keep myself in warm water until I’m no longer stressed out. Water is awesome for Pisces placements:D .. (lots of celebrities have Pisces in Venus :0 and many wealthy individuals too )

Anyhow be mindful of your space since strong Pisces placements can easily pick up on energy and sometimes even intake someone’s sadness or anxiety etc. Remember boundaries and remember self love and appreciation for your self even if you don’t feel worthy please remember YOU ARE!

Strong Pisces placements strongly attract soulmates since a young age. I’ve seen my Pisces friends do so they also attract karmic lovers or negative people aswell. It’s important for Pisces placements to really not get so lost in love , do not forget your self worth and make a list of someone you truly see good for you because you guys are pros at manifesting LOVE! It’s your super power , make a list of a healthy , lover who will actually be there for you in a positive way because if you don’t have an idea you will always always attract lovers yes but maybe lovers who match the respect you have for yourself. If you hurt yourself your partners will probably lay hands on you which is not at all beautiful it’s not love please leave if someone isn’t treating you right . Out of most of the signs I wanna just protect you guys because you guys are usually angels who love to know me deeply and it scares me sometimes but most of the time you guys really love to be kind to me and help me feel safe thank you :).

Also thank you guys for always predicting things I don’t think you’re delusional 😅 I know you guys are connected to other realms and it’s different for other planets that are more connected to other things. Thank you for your healing vibes and your deep energy it’s not unbearable it’s okay :) being around my Pisces friends makes me feel like I’m floating 😭 NEPTUNE stuff yk

I know an astrologer who said thank you “Venus in Pisces” 😂😭 for helping other Venus signs remember that true love does exist , for being ideal lovers , for being ,ethereal ,cosmic, magical and healing towards your friends, family and lovers. It made me less shameful to have this placement 😂 like I was so against emotions back then as a kid I was like noooo not me and I was very disconnected from feelings I was kinda a mean kid I won’t like but only to people who kept bothering me because mainly I was a quiet mouse in the of the room looking 😂.

Anyhow Pisces is magical, artistic , dreamy but there’s also Pisces energy that is not balanced and …

When this planet isn’t balanced well it can be flighty , it can be unpredictable, you might struggle to stay awake because sleep really feels safe to you , you might be really lazy, can become addicts to substances, to drinking in order to get lost from this reality , you might like to stay in day dream land instead of focusing on your tasks or taking action to your wants , you might hurt yourself to please others or even your partners , if you got cheated on or emotionally harmed you guys end up becoming the people who hurt you and not healing or changing, you guys might not care about reality, you guys might be extremely insecure, you guys might seem like a Libra at times aswell when both of you guys are not balanced those signs tend to run to a new romance every chance you get and it never ends for you guys it gets bad to the point where you realize you never had feelings for anyone or was just the highs you were chasing or it can be that you realize you had feelings for someone but libra & Pisces can be this way where they play around for too long and it’s too late to fix what you self sabotaged on purpose. Idk why you guys do this I’ve seen it in people around me who have Venus in Libra or Pisces ! Anyhow :) I get confused with Libra placements & Pisces placements since it’s such a similar vibe sometimes:) so lovy dovy like who’s who 😭😂 but Pisces is more selfless which kinda hurts to see how far they can go to show people how much they care even if it means they will get harmed I usually push them to love themselves before someone else because I don’t like how people easily take advantage of Pisces placements like NOO 😭 leave them alone.

In conclusion Pisces placements are awesome healing friends when balanced thank you 😊 but please please please remember not to empty your cup for someone who wouldn’t do the same for you or who does it too late when you healed and moved on . You deserve happiness, peace and love may you guys find ideal good positive energy.

[dawnlune]

Sailor Jupiter (Sagittarius ♐️)

(One of my favorite sailors for 🥰 being so protective of her friends)

Sagittarius ♐️ is Ruled by the planet Jupiter and the 9th house with the 9th & 21st degree

My take on the planet Jupiter.

When balanced this planet is all about luck , abundance, fortune, naturally gives someone an inner child healer vibe to those around them. People with strong Sagittarius placements tend to be the smarty pants with a free spirt very golden retriever energy, very energetic individuals. This planet makes people adventurous, positive,philosophical , professors, spiritual lovers, optimistic, open minded , loving , compassionate and overprotective energy. They usually love to spoil everyone they love like the other lucky planets ( Pisces , libra & Taurus)

Sagittarius is naturally a sign that can manifest a life they desire. Due to having that planet it’s very easy to wish and it will happen for you. I believe strongly that if you have Jupiter or Sagittarius in your 1st house it’s like hitting the jackpot 🎰 you not only have inner child healing energy but you also have this big light of energy that’s so strong to your aura that can definitely cause jealousy to individuals who don’t have a spot light, you might even be the type to get free things , win those contest gifts , get a winning lottery ticket, fierce to make moments happen for you , you may attract wealthy partners, you might attract very attractive partners as well , your the types that can get turned down but you randomly got chosen for a price or you get other offers … sorry but Sagittarius is one of the effortlessly luckiest signs. Also let’s not forget the glowy skin I think working out really helps your skin glow. You usually have a glowy smile if you have lots of Sagittarius to your birthchart or if you have Jupiter in the 1st house. Honestly this sign is also a positive sign for marriage like I see Sagittarius as the type to marry the person they love for reals like they have the luck to marry soulmates for reals I’ve seen it 😂. All my Sagittarius friends usually end up with who they want even if ngl in the process they don’t always choose green flags. They tend to not see it and even I miss that with even my friendships like I use to spoil my friends until hahahah 🥴 some of them betrayed me and all but why go there I began protecting my peace and continue to stay away from groups of friends I have very little friends for safety now hehe :) I feel good this way. People with strong Sagittarius placements are literally the most fun sign , open minded , thoughtful, caring , the types of friends who will take you out of your shell , like to learn about you.. literally the colorful souls who would honestly do anything you want for the thrill of it and as long as they arnt making a spot for too long they love exploring and jumping and working out.

(I can’t complain I have Jupiter in my first house and Pluto aspecting it 😩 I also have Sagittarius in my 7th house I can’t complain on the Pluto conjunction to my 7th house aswell like why me 😫 yet I’m one of the luckiest people and I dont like bragging like I hate feeling better than others because no one is better than me and I’m not better than anyone. One time I wasn’t given gifts as a kid for my birthday because I only had a mom there for me really but an elderly man gave me a lottery ticket he asked me to smile & apologized for only getting me a lame 5 dollar ticket I smiled and took it , scratched it omg what do you know I got 100 dollars 😭 I was so happy and thankful 🥹 ) people sometimes call me “god’s favorite or someone’s favorite because I might get harmed , stabbed in the back but in the end up getting gifts I never asked for or excepted like whatttt? Awwweee you didn’t have to 😭) i have strong pluto & saturn stuff so you can imagine how stressful life is with me but come on i appreciate my Venus sign as well (yes im an air sign rising in the 1st house but Jupiter being there really gives me an optimistic vibe to life. And yes I’ve been dragged by life like im some worthless piece of garbage all the trauma and harm done to me but I believe that this planet still delivers to me some sort of sunshine so that I smile about something even if it’s a humming bird running into me when I’m having a bad day or seeing a lizard do pushups in front of me 😂. I’m alone and suddenly people want to be friend and I even get people fan girling about my existence like grown men have really made a big commotion without knowing me 😭 it’s scary and funny. Woman too 😂 I’m literally at the store and people treat me like a celebrity and I’m not I’m not I’m not 😂 like please don’t 🥴 do this it’s embarrassing and i get scared. (I’ve also got chosen to work for celebrity models right off the bat in my MU career like how the f? 🤣 idk thank you Jupiter & venus

Sagittarius is a happy go lucky sign , it’s usually said that if you create something you usually right off the bat get attention, noticed and so on. Jupiter is literally about “ATTRACT”

When this planet is not balanced

It can turn into an “I know it all” placement with no room for learning anymore it can turn into the no sympathy or sugar coating person. It can be the noncommittal sign , it can be the sign that doesn’t know how to respect other people’s boundaries , might become passive aggressive , might have a hard time regulating emotions, might be very impulsive, arrogance can be big , ego might also be unbalanced , easily can move on , easily likes to run after what’s next.

This sign can sometimes remind me of Leo like sometimes I can get confused because those two signs are very sunny signs. I’ve seen other astrologers say “Leo can find Sagittarius placements a little hard to accept because Sagittarius can be very bright aswell” I think both signs are bright signs. I see lots of cool things :D since my 7th house and my 1st house has Sagittarius yes I get along with Sagittarius easily Juno I got it in Sagittarius too :) love you Sagittarius buddies you guys treat me like a kid and I appreciate 🥺🙂 but I’m a grown up so yes we can go dare each other to see who can go sky diving 🤣