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Jaune: i have a plan

Nora: me too

Jaune: whats your plan?

Nora: to listen to your plan

Jaune: good plan

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the leaves of the ever after tree looked a lot like something from home

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Don't Drink, And Swim

Jaune: Uhh, Weiss?

Weiss: Yes, Jaune?

Jaune: Are you just doing a bit with your shark plushies, or is this a a comment on your mother's drinking habits?

Weiss: Yes.

Jaune: Okay, but what did, Sir Bittington do to deserve this?

Weiss: He knows what he did!

Jaune: But...?

Weiss: He KNOWS!

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Doctor: *wheels Pyrrha out in a wheelchair*

Pyrrha: Wheeeooooo…! 🥴

Doctor: Sir. your wife is so muscular that we didn’t have enough anesthesia on-site to perform the procedure. You’ll have to take her home and schedule another appointment later.

Jaune: Wow… 😦

Pyrrha: *holds up her hands in amazement* Jaune…! They made me into a superhero!! 🤩

Jaune: So, she has no filter at all right now?

Doctor: Absolutely none.

Jaune: Pyrrha, what’s your opinion on Professor Goodwitch?

Pyrrha: *snorts* That lady needs to smoke some WEED! 🤣

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Jaune: Ah, damn... Low on energy... Hey, Nora? You got a socket I can use?

Nora: Sure~! Let me just sliiide this stuff in the way over so you can plug it into my socket~.

Jaune: Ngh! It's... a bit tight...

Nora: Oh, is it~? Maybe because nobody's ever used it~. You're the first person to EVER use my socket~.

Nora: Oh! Look at that! Your scroll is charging!

Jaune: Great! I was worried my plug wasn't gonna fit!

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Yang asked Jaune if he could help her try out her new exercise machine...

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Jaune: Wait a minute... This isn't an exercise machine! This is just your bed!

Yang: (Shuts door, Locks) It's a special exercise machine...

Yang: The kind that takes two people to operate~.

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BANZAI!!!

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Weiss: I want a man who's strong like Zoro, cooks like Sanji, and is as handsome as Shanks.

Jaune: ...I'm goofy like Luffy.

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Jaune: Alright, let's have a look.

Yang: (Sighs, Pulls down shorts, Bends over)

Jaune: Uh, okay? So, here's everything I found wrong with your bike...

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Logic

Jaune: I'm sorry Neo, but what's the point of putting a ball gag in your mouth when we do it when you're mute?

Neo typing out a response.

Neo: Excuse me, I'm trying to be horny, quite ruining it with logic!

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Jaune: A week after we met, Pyrrha started training me for combat, and over time she transitioned from combat training to teaching me to perform her favorite sex acts on her so smoothly that I honestly can’t pinpoint where any changes took place on the way.

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Jaune: Oscar, I choose you!

Ironwood: And I choose...

Ironwood: Alright, hand over your money. Now.

Jaune: Y-You can't do this! That's not even a Pokémon!

Ironwood: Sure it is. It's a... glock... achu. Yeah. A glockachu. Totally legit. It's super-effective against... Well, everything.

With Glockachu at his side, the champion's rise was the fastest in recorded history. His unique... strategy instantly revolutionized the art of Pokémon battling. The ensuing arms race was both terrible and swift. THE WORLD OF POKEMON WOULD NEVER BE THE SAME.

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Why dad?! Why?!

Blake: *Hugging Jaune's arm* Dad, can I be with him?

Jaune: *Waves his hand*

Ghira: *Smiling* Of course. Jaune is a great young man.

Blake: WHY PAPA!!!

Ghira: *Confuse* What?! I'm telling you to be with him.

Blake: *Crying* But I love him!

Ghira: I like him too, he's from a good family and treats you well.

Blake: Why are you trying to separate us!

Ghira: I don't wanna separate you two!

Blake: Please don't do this to me! Please, I wanna run away!

Ghira: You can run away with him! Kali, can you help me please!

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A whiteknight ask when weiss gets horny she gives jaune this look:

Weiss: "Jaune. You, me, bed, Now!"

*Jaune was talking with his parents, who looked at the middle Schnee child with wide eyes*

Jaune: "I'll catch up with you guys." *gets dragged by Weiss*

Papa Arc: "Remember: Pace yourself!"

Mama Arc: "Also, pulling out makes the God of Light cry!"