darkot

[darkot]

Oh yeah, Tumblr

Well shit. I definitely didn't intend for my previous post to be my last for so long — but here we are. Let's talk!

With everything Tumblr's been through, I don't even know if any of my old followers are even still active on this site to see this. Either way though — whether falling on a few ears or being cast into the void of Tumblr — I could use this space again to get my thoughts out, and have some form of documentation of the years to come.

Originally, I was going to make this "back from the dead" post on my Blogspot. But I'll be real with you — I don't have the first fucking clue about what's going on with it. The CSS on it has been broken for years, and as a spur-of-the-moment thing today, I decided to try and fix it. However, I got nowhere with it. They updated it in some way that broke the customizations I made to it, and I honestly could not figure out how to make it work the way I wanted it to again. The header's broken, the dynamic theme doesn't apply properly to the page links anymore, and for some reason every post on there got duplicated??? As far as I'm concerned, that blog is now condemned.

I cut my losses trying to figure out how to fix that blog, and instead turned my attention to this poor, neglected Tumblr page. There were some things broken on here as well (infinite scrolling didn't work, page elements were out of alignment, etc.), but I am very pleased to say that all of that is now fixed! I spent a few hours on it, and finished up getting everything right just before writing this.

I know the appearance of your blog doesn't matter all that much since the majority of users are going to see your posts on the dashboard/tags — but the way I look at it, your page is kind of like your first impression. Sure, it's not going to get viewed very much by your followers ongoingly — but someone who is completely new to you is going to have to see it once when checking you out to see if you're follow-worthy. And well, you know how the old saying goes:

You never get a second chance to make a good first impression — Will Rogers

All of that said, I didn't just give up on my Blogspot because it was too challenging to fix (those who know me would tell you that I'm waaaaaay too stubborn to let any form of puzzle defeat me haha). No — even though the time commitment was a factor — I just realized that it was kind of a pointless platform for me. A lot of its features are outdated, and Tumblr (though not perfect by any means) could easily fill its shoes for me — and more!

The whole point of this post when I had originally planned to write it, was to say that I want to start really moving forward with my company/productions, and building a community around them. And while I was futilely working on getting my Blogspot working again, it suddenly clicked that, Tumblr would be way better for that.

On Blogspot.. well, you kind of have to be known, before anyone will visit your blog in the first place. But here, people can discover you and your content! So, all in all, I figured my time was better spent fixing up this page and getting the ball rolling with a post on here, since it is so much more in line with my goals.

Plus.. having 2 blogs in kind of redundant. I don't know why I did that in the first place really (I think it was because I thought my reblogs would drown out my content/make it less seen??)

Phew, okay. Now that all that prefacing's out of the way (no, you didn't read that wrong. Everything above this paragraph was just the preface), strap in! Because I'm about to tell you a story. A story about stories. A story about a storyteller who wants to tell stories, and the story of how he lost his way with the art of storytelling.

What motivated me to fix up one of my blogs and make a post in the first place is that, before this, I just annihilated my Discord friend group's chat with a wall of text about the new issue of the Overwatch: New Blood comic.

This seemingly unassuming (if slightly inconsiderate) action had 3 affects. The first being: it made me realize how much I missed sharing my thoughts on things.

Back in the day on my Blogspot, I used to write long, thoughtful posts on whatever topic I felt like talking about. From my thoughts on art theory, to recent games I've played, to movies/shows I just finished, and beyond. But I haven't done that for ages now — and that's something that's really important to me. I like being understood by those around me — and by extension, I want my thoughts on things to be known as well. So, while I haven't been posting, my friends and family are the ones who I've gotten to listen to me rant on about the things that have my attention at any given point. And while they certainly aren't getting off the hook still — I at least won't feel the need to go as in-depth with it, which leads right into the next point..

Discord spam is inconsiderate. Blasting a chat that has messages in the 1-3 line size range with a fucking essay just doesn't feel right. I wanted to get those thoughts off my chest, but not at the sake of making our chat harder to read. I doubt that my friends were bothered by it all that much, but I'd still rather be considerate towards how everyone might not appreciate that.

Lastly, and most importantly.. it was another reminder of how much I love storytelling, and want to make stories.

Contrary to how much I adored the new issue of Overwatch: New Blood, and all of the things I raved about in it — I was still rather critical of the story structure.

In this 5 issue comic mini-series McCree (still not quite used to calling him Cassidy..) has been travelling around the world to recruit members for the newly reformed Overwatch, as a lead-up to the point that Overwatch 2's story campaign will be taking place.

To summarize the wall of text that I wrote on this topic already, while I love the characterization, world building, and the mini-plots of each issue (not to mention the artwork. Oh my god the artwork is stunning!!), my one criticism is that the premise is a little too convenient and honestly.. feels kind of lazy, from a narrative perspective.

So far, in the 4 out of 5 issues that have been released. McCree has recruited Pharah, Baptiste, and Zarya — with D.va heavily implied to be his fourth recruit in the upcoming final issue.

The moments between McCree and these characters are an absolute delight, and honestly, they are handling this route about as flawlessly as they could be. But that said.. I wish these characters were being introduced into the core Overwatch plot more organically. Having McCree just go around and round up all of the outlier characters who aren't associated with the Overwatch organization yet feels kind of cheap on the surface — even if the execution under the surface is stellar.

For comparison: In the Overwatch 2 Story Campaign, from what we've seen so far, Lucio is going to become a member of Overwatch in a bit of a more organic way. From the looks of things, Overwatch is going to come to Rio de Janeiro (Lucio's city) in order to defend it against the omnic threat Null Sector — and along the way, they're going to bump into Lucio, who is also defending his home.

That is exactly what I wanted for these other characters. For complex circumstances to bring them in the path of Overwatch, instead of them being pulled into the main story just because the plot demands it.

Now, to be completely fair, I'm 99% certain that, this plot and the whole comic mini-series by extension came about due to time constraints with making the story campaign for Overwatch 2. They probably had to go this route with introducing Pharah, Baptiste, Zarya and D.va to Overwatch ahead of time, because they didn't have time to make an organic recruitment sub-plot for each of them in the upcoming game (especially with the already well known in-game recruitment of Lucio, as well as the heavily implied recruitment of Zenyatta, and potentially many others). But all in all, I think it is still a valid criticism despite the potentially very valid reasoning behind the narrative decision.

All of that said now, I do this a lot with stories. Be it games, movies or shows — I'm constantly analyzing them and considering how they could have done certain things "better." I put better in quotes because, as an art, storycraft is entirely subjective. So, you can't say that one way of doing things is objectively better than another way of doing things (except with Game of Thrones Season 8, because we all know that a toddler writing in the mud with his finger could have written a more satisfying ending to that show). What I mean is, my version of better. What would have appealed to me more, and what I would have found more satisfying personally.

One quote that's stuck with me for a long time (that I sadly don't remember the source/author of) was from someone in the video game or television industry who, in response to someone criticising their game/show, encouraged them to make their own product without these flaws that they saw in this game/show.

While that may have come across tongue-in-cheek, I do think that they were being genuine — and the message had an impact on me. If you have a vision of how you want things to be, rather than sit around and criticise other people's creations for not being that, why not create the thing you want to watch/play yourself?

Often, I find that stories, or moments in stories, juuust fall short of how I would have liked them to be. Where if they pushed this element a little further, or tweaked this aspect a little bit, or emphasized this one thing more, that it would have been so much more impactful to me. Thus, I think that quote is very applicable to me. I have a vision. I know what I like in media. I know what really impacts me and wows me, and as close as my favourite series/games have gotten to that... none ever will. Because only I can make that.

That reminds me of another quote. It was along the lines of "Only you can create the stories you think of, because your world view is unique to you and nobody else could write it the way you would." That is a complete paraphrase, but it gets the idea across. Perhaps as part of my desire to be understood by others, I want to share that unique world view, and tell those stories that nobody else could. To make those series that are perfect in my eyes. The kinds of shows that I would love to watch, and would be heartbroken to see end.

I may have shared this sentiment before (perhaps on this very blog), but I am definitely more of a storyteller than I am an artist. Art is a tool to me — the medium through which I think story can be most powerfully conveyed. Outside of my figure drawings, every single piece of my art has always had a strong story/concept focus. Fix-it Felix as Doctor Who, Vegeta the "pretty princess of all saiyans," Hat Kid using Link's cap to get the power of a deku leaf, Bowser as a genie in a pipe.. rarely, if ever, have I just drawn a character as-is, for the sake of drawing them. I've always needed to put my own spin on it — to have an idea unique and interesting enough to be worth drawing, because otherwise I don't see the point (personally. Absolutely not bashing on anyone else who gets enjoyment out of just drawing characters they like!)

Art, by itself, has never been a passion of mine. And I think that's really begun to show over the years. My long periods of going dark and not drawing just go to show that, I don't find art alone fulfilling. Still art with an interesting concept can keep me occupied for a short time until it's complete — but it's not what I ultimately want to do.

With the start of this though, I have a plan.

This is a concept piece I did last year, for Overwatch's "Pachimarchi" event. There's a whole backstory behind the idea over on my Deviantart where I posted it.

Sadly, it didn't do too well on Reddit — but I am still super proud of this piece both conceptually and executionarily (that's not a word, but you know what I mean haha). So, with March coming up again, I think I'm going to dedicate some more time to finishing this piece up, with full rendering, and a back view — whether or not Overwatch decides to do another Pachimarchi event this year. I am so confident in this being a great idea that other people can enjoy, and want to give it another shot, but this time giving it my all!

If you made it this far into the post, did you just skip to the end? Or are you stalking me O.O? Either way, I appreciate you for reading however much of this you did. Stay tuned! I'm going to continue posting here, using the #darkotarts tag for my artwork, and the new #darkotsmind tag for writings like this — as a nod to my now defunct Blogspot's name. R.I.P DarkotsMind 2012-2022. Long live #DarkotsMind!

[darkot]

New Beginning

It has been nearly 3 months since my last post, and I am not ashamed to say that... I failed.

I have not been drawing daily. I have not made much progress on the projects I want to do this year (being a quarter of the way into 2018, now). I have not leapt. Neither have I relented, however. In this time, I have remained poised to leap, and now, I believe I am truly ready.

I had to be surprisingly ignorant about myself, to think that it was as simple as saying “I haven’t drawn in ages, but I’m going to now, and that’s that.” There was a reason I wasn’t drawing in the first place, and I needed to overcome that hurdle before I could realistically do this.

So, I searched, and I searched inside of myself to try and find what was holding me back... and what I found was a residual pain. 

You know aversion therapy? The type where you discourage yourself from doing something using a rubber band? Every time you do that thing, you snap it on your wrist. Then, after a while of doing that, you stop using the rubber band, but you still feel the sting that you have come to associate with that action when you think about it -- thus, training yourself out of doing it.

I found that, something similar was going on with me and drawing. I was afraid to pick up the tablet pen. Not cowering in a corner afraid, or freaking out when presented with the prospect afraid... but, I shied away from it constantly. It would be right next to me, and yet, when I thought about drawing something, I would find an excuse not to do it.

I realized this in a situation where a friend was pushing me to draw. After I had the stylus in my hand... everything was easy from there. I had a blast drawing. I enjoyed the hell out of it, and it felt right. But, that didn’t cure what was stopping me from doing it on my own. I still wasn’t drawing for a good while after that, because I was still weary of taking up the pen myself.

After some experiences a few years back, I started associating the tablet pen with negative emotions. Doubt, stress, sadness, and discouragement -- in the absence of confidence, fun, kindness, and support. Every time I picked up that stylus for a year, I was snapping the metaphoric rubber band on my wrist, and in the end, I stopped picking it up, in order to stop the pain.

Until now, I did not know it... but I’ve been feeling the phantom sting from that experience, every time I’ve thought about drawing. And though I’ve successfully been avoiding that pain simply by not drawing, another type of hurting has surfaced, in its wake -- the pain of not creating.

When I keep all of these ideas bottled up in my head and don’t get them onto the canvas... I am miserable. I am not exaggerating in saying that I feel physically ill, when I am not creating regularly.

This has been the root of the deep frustration that I have referenced in so many of my past posts. The need to create -- knowing that, while I am drawing, my heart sings, but not being able to bring myself to do it.

I think my mother put it best, when she described it as a form of self harm. That, I wasn’t doing what was best for me, as a way of punishing myself. And she was right. Up until a few days ago, I did feel like I didn’t deserve the good feeling that drawing gave me. 

Things are different now, though.

That is still a W.I.P... but I am proud of it. I’ve drawn this over the course of a couple sessions for a larger project I’d like to do -- and I plan on working on it for a few more.

I also did these two gesture drawings in the days before that one, to ease myself back into things. As simple as they are, I am proud of them as well.

I think that, with this, that chapter in my life is now finally, 100% behind me. I’m am ready. I’m ready to make some amazing fucking art. I’m ready to become who I was meant to be. I’m ready to make new connections. And most importantly, I am ready to forge into the future.

To new beginnings.

[darkot]

[darkot]

I was talking with some pals last night, and Mike told me that he got better at drawing by staring at this image until he “understood it.” (from Eric Goldberg’s “Character Animation Crash Course”)

The first image is drawing anatomical/construction first, gesture second. The second image is drawing the gesture/expression first, then the anatomy second. The first image produces stiff character acting, the second image produces explosive character acting.

I’m gonna stare at it too until I understand it. Come on, stare with me. 

[darkot]

Source: [x]

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[darkot]

please do not actually eat detergent pods

i know funny meme haha but listen: pods are not normal soap. the detergent is so concentrated that it is highly caustic.

some (but not all) things that can happen when you bite a tide pod:

skin, eye, mouth, throat, gastrointestinal chemical burns

intense vomiting

burns inside the lungs

pulmonary edema (bleeding in the lungs)

chemical pneumonia

respiratory failure

actual literal death

please do not put yourself in the hospital for a meme.

[darkot]

Source [x]

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[darkot]

So difficulty with posing is usually a symptom of another underlying problem.

I’ll focus on poses for now, and I’ll discuss framing in another post!

Problem one:

Lack of a solid gesture.

I shan’t talk too much about this, as there’s a fantastic video series by stan prokopenko about gesture & figure drawing that you can find here! :

and you can find more on the subject in my gesture tag here:

http://helpfulharrie.tumblr.com/tagged/gesture

Problem two:

You need to reframe your thinking!

Posing is a word that brings to mind picking up a toy to arrange its limbs into a certain position, or asking a fashion model to stand in a way that shows off all their clothes, etc. Ultimately, it’s a very stiff and lifeless word about putting something into a static position, and it’s not how I’d recommend approaching your art!

Instead you want to think about how your subjects are acting - they’re living, breathing characters, and you’re just catching a snapshot of them while they are doing something. The image you’re drawing may be still, but the character inside it is not.

This is especially important in comics and sequential media, but even in a single image you want to think about what your subject is doing, how they’re feeling, and how you want to convey this.

Consider your character’s body language, and when drawing a conversation think about how your character gesticulates.

It’s not uncommon in animation to get up and physically act out what you want to animate. It’s good practice, it’s easier to understand what you’re drawing if you do it yourself!

I recommend studying films and paying close attention to how the characters are acting. try watching a single scene a few times, and watch how the characters express themselves.

For example, watch this clip from kung fu panda 3!

It’s just 12 seconds, but pay attention to how the characters act. If I were to make this into a comic page it’d probably look something like this:

Do you see how the characters’ acting informs the still poses :?

For some further reading you can find some posts about body language in this tag: http://helpfulharrie.tumblr.com/tagged/body%20language

as well as a post i wrote last year about making poses dynamic: http://helpfulharrie.tumblr.com/post/146669907351/do-you-have-any-personal-tips-for-making-and-poses

And an exercise I would highly recommend doing is this body language one: https://paraparano.deviantart.com/art/Body-Language-Meme-182498610

It’s like those expression memes, but instead you’re focusing on the whole figure!

Also, when thinking about your characters’ acting, don’t forget about how they might interact with props or things in their environment!

Part of the problem might be that they don’t feel grounded in the scene, leading you to feel like something is lacking. Roger rabbit is a fantastic example of how to ground characters in an environment:

The toons obviously aren’t real, but they feel like they’re tangible and inside the scene because they pick up props, physically interact with people, smash into tables, and just generally leave a real impact on the world around them.

Try remember to show how your characters are interacting with the things around them to really sell their acting! Best of luck, I hope this helps!!

[darkot]

My favorite childhood shows → The Weekenders

[darkot]

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[darkot]

Fake anime screenshot!! I had been wanting to try it for a while so, take a d.va~

art by tetratheripper

[darkot]

[darkot]

[darkot]

new merch available in white and black on my site, inspired by my spending habits lol 🖤 kieraplease.com/merch

[darkot]

[darkot]

As an introvert, once u find someone that u enjoy spending time with just as much as u like being alone, that’s a big fucking deal

[darkot]

I have bullshitted my way through almost two decades of life