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How you connect with others: 7th house and 8th house

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When talking about the 8th house in regards to relationships, the first thing that we think of is sex, however the 8th house rules sex because it is all about any type of deeper intimacy in any committed connection. Our 7th house tells us how we relate to others and what type of connections we like to establish with others but the 8th house can tell more about what you need in order to nurture and establish a deeper connection with someone. Of course many other things in the chart are very telling of how you connect with others such as Moon or Venus, but in this post I'll focus on the the 8th house which is all about going past that one-on-one interaction (7th house) to really let the other person in, which is why you may or may not be comfortable with your 8th house energy. This house is very telling of the type of energy you need in order to build trust and strong binding and also how you behave with the people you trust

*Please note:

If you're using placidus and you find that you're in situation where for example you're a water ASC but your 8th house is ruled by water and not air just pay attention to the 7th house description of water asc and the 8th description of fire asc and so on. If your 7th and 8th house are ruled by the same sign for example Virgo, these descriptions still apply cause the following sign (Libra) will still occupy some of the 8th house but you could also relate to the earth 8th house description of air risings

Planets and the rest of the chart will give more nuance and layers to these energies

Earth risings really want to get to know someone on a really deep level due to water DSC. They don't necessarily overshare (they very much can), but they are the ones who can get through to others, they're the type to want to make small talk vulnerable or deep right away and you will notice this with how easy it is for them to get through to others. They are very good listeners and can easily make people feel loved and appreciated even through a casual interaction. They do this because they want to know who someone is deep down so when intimacy comes they feel free enough to show their wilder, adventurous or even childish side without being judged since they have fire 8th house. They want to be pampered back and feel a little "selfish" and free and dominate the situation or their partner doing so. I like to think of it as they charm people in (water 7th house) so they can be adored (fire 8th house) but not in a malicious way of course. The type of dynamic they seek with people they trust always involves playfulness, spontaneity and will definitely be out the door if you judge their personality or ego in some way. If they don't trust you they will be able to stir you up emotionally without showing you their real personality which can result in them leading people on a lot. This does not mean they are fake but since they are earth risings, they are used to keeping it together all the time so they want to be able to let loose during intimacy. They are attracted to people who they find a little daring cause they are looking for someone who takes out their feisty side.

Virgo risings (Pisces 7th house, Aries 8th house) -> their way of making deeper connections is actually very child-like due to the dreaminess mixed with impulsiveness. They can get infatuated quite easily and want a partner that keeps them on their toes always longing. They commit passionately and blindly

Capricorn risings (Cancer 7th house, Leo 8th house) -> they want to feel cared for and pampered so admiration is a big factor here for what makes these natives want to connect more deeply. They are very attentive people and want a partner that respects them and always takes them into account

Taurus risings (Scorpio 7th house, Sagittarius 8th house) -> these people want to go all in in their connections in every aspect, no bs kinda vibe, specially when it comes to intimacy they want to be able to just go wild with their partner, explore the good and the ugly and simply have fun doing so

Fire risings prefer people who give them light-hearted and fun conversations which they genuinely find entertaining and interesting and they’re more open to interacting with all sorts of people due to air DSC. They are easily swayed by other's mind or surface-level charm, but they want to get to know the actual deeper personality of others, so these natives are actually more sentimental than what they may actually look in a casual interaction. Once they've been charmed by someone mentally, when it comes to intimacy they want to feel comfortable enough to show their deeper self and to know each other deeper due to water ruling 8th house. They're the type to want a relationship where you can talk about gossip and their trauma just as comfortably, but they won't trust someone they can only have surface level conversations with or someone who is inconsiderate with their emotional expression or disregards their deeper views of things. As fire risings, they are used to coming across as tough and confident but when it comes to intimacy they need to feel like there's always an open door for vulnerability and softness if they need it. If they don't trust you emotionally, they'll just enjoy having a casual mentally stimulating conversation and then move on, so it's easy for them to come across as charming to many people. They want a connection that has a fun and light-hearted dynamic but with a strong emotional bond underneath it all. These natives are the type to fall for charming and intelligent individuals that are 'softies' on the inside

Sagittarius risings (Gemini 7th house, Cancer 8th house) -> with this mix they definitely will get intimate with someone who says just the right things and verbally comforts them. They want a relationship where they can keep things youthful and emotionally soft with not much turmoil

Aries risings (Libra 7th house, Scorpio 8th house) -> these peeps are the epitome of charming, they want to connect with people that they relate to in some way but will accept and embrace their dark side and secrets, their way of making deep connections is by taking the person into their inner cave with them

Leo risings (Aquarius 7th house, Pisces 8th house) -> these natives have a habit of getting in problematic relationships and romanticizing them for it. They fall for unconventional or chaotic people and then have this "they don't understand that I see past that and I love you for your soul" sort of intimacy

Air risings tend to surround themselves with people that provide them with brand new experiences, people who are entertaining, fun and independent due to their fire DSC. They always want to do new things with the people they like and come in contact with and they also like people who are 'their own person'. These natives are often very blunt and outspoken actually and it's not uncommon for them to be seen as rude, bold or nonchalant sometimes, but as much as they enjoy interacting with stimulating and bold people, when it comes to intimacy and a deeper connection they desire stability and reliability due to earth ruling their 8th house. Basically they won't commit to and specially won't trust someone who is fun but lacks consistency and dependability. Deep down they themselves are very reliable, but they reserve that side of themselves for the people they love and trust, therefore they will commit to a partner that will reciprocate this type of energy. They are very fun people to be around and they're usually rather popular, but once they trust you they will show a more serious and respectful side to them. They will want to connect with people who are independent and stimulating but deep down is chill, low-key and reliable underneath it all. When it comes to deep intimacy they will feel like it's safe to trust someone who shows patience and consistency even if it's not too emotional or fiery. Being air risings, they're very mental normally, so they will like to commit and give themselves to someone that grounds them

Libra risings (Aries 7th house, Taurus 8th house) -> they like spontaneity and indulgence. They are drawn to people who they find immediately attractive and catches their eye, but they like to connect deeply with someone by sharing strong sensuality and calmness that goes beyond a first-time thrill

Aquarius risings (Leo 7th house, Virgo 8th house) -> they love to connect with people who have golden retriever vibe to them and is very loyal and helpful. They will connect deeply with someone by lighting up their day with lots of fun and laughter but also by casually being always there if they need anything

Gemini risings (Sagittarius 7th house, Capricorn 8th house) -> these people love connecting with individuals that bring expansion into their life and will connect deeply with others by giving them some authority. If these people trust you, they will secretly take what you say very seriously

Water risings are quite charming, but they're the type to draw people in while keeping a respectful distance with them. They don't mind being approached but they definitely don't like when people get too close too soon cause they like the process of building a connection. They usually come across as a little serious and stiff when interacting with others and it's not rare for them to keep their social circle small or always interact with the exact same people. This is because they take relationships seriously and like consistency and predictability in their connections and interactions, but when intimacy comes they want to trust someone enough to freely detach due to air ruling the 8th house. They won't commit to someone who is reliable but boring and uninteresting. Being water risings, they are constantly very perceptive of the energies around them, so when it comes to intimacy they will feel very good with someone who they can just take it easy and have a more light-hearted energy. Ironically, these are the most distant and detached risings when it comes to connections and intimacy, but this does not mean they don't love deeply. In fact, this "let's just say, do and talk about whatever, it doesn't matter" side is one they reserve for people who they really trust, that's why they can be dry towards other people who they don't find interesting. These natives usually fall for people who they have to "figure out" in some way sort of like "oh you're reliable and consistant (earth dsc) but I can tell (water asc) that there's more to you and I wanna know more (air 8th house)"

Scorpio risings (Taurus 7th house, Gemini 8th house) -> they definitely want physical attraction paired with some mental thrill so it's common for them to fall for players or be players themselves. They will connect deeply with someone who they can share physical and mental chemistry all in one

Pisces risings (Virgo 7th house, Libra 8th house) -> these natives are naturally very helpful and thoughtful, but they know how to keep to themselves and not give too much. That's why when they connect deeply with someone they're the type to want to share every single with the other person

Cancer risings (Capricorn 7th house, Aquarius 8th house) -> with this double Saturn influence, these natives are the most serious and selective about all their connections, they will feel very connected to someone that gives them a traditional commitment while also opening their minds to new and odd things

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