cynical-kitten

[cynical-kitten]

On one hand, I need to put work in on my current fic.

On the other… I just finished the main questline for Hogwarts Legacy and Sebastian’s side quests. I’m ITCHING to write the little worm that’s wiggled its way into my brain because there’s no way it just ends here.

UPDATE: I have no self control. I created a whole ass plot line in 30 minutes.

[cynical-kitten]

And then dive into the new obsession that replaced it

[cynical-kitten]

It would be really cool if people could stop using the Alastor x OC tag on x reader fics.

x reader and x OC are not the same. One is an empty, flat mirror and the other is a fully developed character with a backstory, a distinct appearance, opinions, and depth. I don't need to be an 18th century English governess to step into Jane Eyre's shoes. I don't need to be a young black man living in The House to empathize with and step inside Piranesi. I don't need to be an immortal unicorn to understand and feel Amalthea's regret and sorrow. That's what imagination and empathy are for--I don't need to be in love in order to powerfully feel someone else's.

I'm ace. I do not imagine myself railing Alastor until he cries, that's what my OC is for. I do NOT want to be involved in any fictional sex, let alone someone else's sex fantasies that the writing structure tells me I personally am involved in. It's a big squick for me.

I fully believe in ship and let ship, don't like don't read, etc, which is why I've struggled silently against this endless tide of x reader fics for a year, watching my own work and the work of friends get buried. But people are making 'don't like don't read' really hard when this is what the "top" section of the Alastor x OC tag looks like (and it goes on for a very long time before even one x OC piece comes up):

This fandom already has a very low engagement rate for authors and artists, and Alastor x reader has its own tag--please use it! The way things are right now makes it very hard to find fellow x OC shippers.

If you like both x reader and x OC, follow both tags! It's as simple as that.

Let the few of us making our lovingly crafted Barbies kiss our favorite blorbos in the sandbox have a little room to do so, please.

[cynical-kitten]

Men in reality

Men in fiction ✅

maybe i was born to read fanfic and obsess over fictional men idk

[cynical-kitten]

And then they write the most beautiful fic that alters my entire soul 😭

“english isn’t my first langua—“ say no more.

[cynical-kitten]

IT’S WEDNESDAY, LOVELIES

And I fuckin’ updated today, so we got some content 😎

[cynical-kitten]

So tonight I've discovered that my daughter has been hiding cans of tuna fish in her bed.

Happy New Year, I guess?

[cynical-kitten]

I can’t help but laugh when people say Lucien feels “entitled” to Elain or is “being pushy” because WHAT LOL

“Hey Rhys, what’d you do when you found out Feyre was your mate?”

Rhys: Ah, yes. Well naturally I didn’t tell her, forced her into a bargain that ensured she would be stuck with me for a week each month and then stole her from her wedding and made her train for her own good!

“And Cassian? What did you do?”

Cassian: Um, I … didn’t tell her, got really mad when she started spinning out and then forced her to be stuck with me and to train for her own good!

“Cool. And Lucien?”

Lucien: I betrayed my oldest friend and travelled with her sister across enemy territory, risking my own life just to be able to SEE my mate. Spoke to her once and made the only suggestion that helped her feel better. Then I went off on another life threatening mission and found her father, tipping the scales of this war and then I left Prythian entirely, giving her space. I come to the city where she lives with presents once or twice a year just to check in.

Lucien is objectively the best male in this series lol. He isn’t even my favorite (because I have bad taste in men oops), but I can admit that he is objectively the best one. Like PLEASE!! It’s fine to ship whatever you want to but let’s not defame my boy for no good reason.

[cynical-kitten]

Posting on AO3 is like, I'm doing this for myself, but also immediately refreshing the page every 5 seconds to see if you get any hits comments or kudos. But totally only writing for me.

[cynical-kitten]

Update, Update, UPDATE

Three for three this week, bitches. I'm on a roll.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/56646082/chapters/157868296

AND ON TOP OF THAT, I ADDED AN ALASTOR POV TO THE BEGINNING (CH. 4)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/56646082/chapters/157868827

"Well," the Baron began, his voice sounding impatient as it sliced through his thoughts. "Answer me, boy, I ain't got all night. Places to be, people to see." Alastor dared to glare at him, annoyed by the audacious demand coming from the loa that ruled over his life. Of course, Samedi only chuckled, amused by his blatant irritation. "Why bother asking when you lurk over my shoulder like a damned parrot?" he grumbled, debating on stealing the bottle of rum from the Baron's hand. Baron Samedi roared with laughter this time, the sound of it rattling through the house. "Don't tell me a harmless young woman's got your knickers all twisted." He slapped his knee, releasing another round of booming guffaws. "Lawd, Brigitte is gon' get a kick outta this!" "Harmless!" Alastor scoffed, staring at the Baron with disbelief. His cigarette threatened to fall from his lips as he gestured with incredulity. "You've tied my soul to one of the most irritating, foul-mouthed creatures in existence! She's a monster!" The Baron sucked air through his teeth in a scolding, yet teasing manner. "I think you oughta go look in a mirror, my boy. That girl ain't the one terrorizin' a whole city with her bloodbath tomfoolery."

[cynical-kitten]

Now that I’ve finished a major plot point, I don’t know what to do to get to the next. It’s fine. Everything is fine.

being a writer is wild

like there are some days where all the words click into place and the sentences flow like silk and then there are other days where your plot is undergoing radioactive decay and you're about to punch through your laptop screen in frustration

[cynical-kitten]

Baby's First One Shot

I had a scene I cut out from my long fic that would not leave my head. It's cute. It's smutty. It's... mine :3

[cynical-kitten]

(Late) WIP Wednesday

I'm late to the party because I've lost all concept of time. I've been working on this doozy of a chapter, so have a snippet :)

(part 1 has already been posted, part 2 is still in the works)

Alastor couldn't quite recall the last time he indulged in the pleasures of sleep.

Had it been days? Weeks? He didn't know, for time had become blurred in a haze of static. What he did know was that this couldn't go on. Although he had conquered worse, these conditions were truly testing his limits. His power was wavering, the strength of it tied directly to his sleep— or lack of it, in this case. The magic that he had kept sharp and steady was dulled by his exhaustion. He was irritable and impatient, more so than usual. In the wake of his frustration, he had accumulated quite the number of souls to broadcast on his show.

The solution was simple: sleep! Yet something so natural, so easy, had become unattainable.

Something had to be done.

Alastor glanced down at the sleeping woman clinging to his lithe form, her arms wrapped around him in a death grip as if he was a safety floatation device in the middle of the ocean. For now, she was silent, aside from the soft snoring that slipped between her lips. From the deceptive expressionless look on her face, she appeared to be resting peacefully. However, if tonight played out like they had over the last several weeks, this would not last long. He knew better than to trust the fragility of this peace.

Ever since the extermination, Manon had been plagued with night terrors that left her sweating and trembling in his arms. She refused to leave Alastor's humble abode, claiming she slept better when he was by her side. What a joke! His poor wife hardly slept at all! Manon would go days without closing her eyes, dreading the moment she would drift off to dreamland. She would do whatever it took to remain awake, which in turn kept Alastor from sleeping since she somehow needed his presence at all hours of the day.

Oh, how he tried to reason with her! Perhaps he was too stern a time or two, but her sobbing pleas for help were proving to be difficult to ignore. Alastor would never admit it, but there was something within her desperation that awakened something foreign and unwelcome within him. Was it sympathy? Hardly, Alastor found it difficult to sympathize with anything. Perhaps it was fascination, a desire to see what would become of her should she be allowed to break completely. 

Or even worse, he just simply couldn't fathom the idea of sharing space with the hollow, unremarkable shell of the force this woman had once been. 

His lips quirked into a humorless grin. That had to be it. God forbid it actually be because he was a sentimental sap that missed his wife (newsflash: he was). He couldn't possibly mourn her for what had been… could he? No. He honestly found her more entertaining when she had fight in her. 

Reasoning with himself, to prove that he hadn't been reduced to such a sorry state, was pointless. Alastor had always been putty in her hands. He loved her, after all. 

Because of that pestering adoration he held for his wife, Alastor refused to stand idly by while she suffered. Going back to his roots, he had experiments with every remedy, ritual, and even the prayers his mother taught him as a child in order to give her as dreamless of a sleep as he could, but to no avail. He found himself in a relentless cycle of exhaustion: watching as Manon drew closer to the brink of succumbing to sleep, listening to her sob and beg for him to do something, trying yet another method of madness only for it to fail, and sitting vigil as she warred with her demons. 

What an absolute mess she had made of him.

[cynical-kitten]

Wishing you all of winter's joys; full of love, light, happiness, health, wealth, and good fortune. May the New Year be kinder, granting every grace to mistakes, solutions to problems, and fruition to dreams. 💕

It's nice to hear from you, friend! I hope this winter season is treating you kindly and the New Year brings an abundance of good luck!

[cynical-kitten]

And the moment we've all (maybe) been waiting for...

A NEW CHAPTER.

Here's a little snippet, but you can read it all here :)

(Psst, this is a flashback)

In the flames, I could see the memory of Alastor surrounded by his aura of shadows as he faced down the angel with an unsettling calmness. He exuded a lethal energy with an intent to kill, even though he knew he was unable to eliminate a heavenly being. His laugh, once a lovely sound to behold, was static-charged and mechanical, like the gears of a radio straining to do their job seamlessly. 

"Did you know," he drawled, twirling his cane as though he was taking a stroll through the city, "that I have a particular fondness for tearing apart those who dare hunt down my wife?"

I had been tossed to the side as the angel posed to launch their attack on Alastor. They snarled, their blade glowing with a righteous fury. My blood still stained the tip of it, illuminating it with a crimson glow. Alastor's eyes narrowed as he caught the glint of it, his smile deadly. Static crackled around us with his rage.

"You'll be lucky to escape back to heaven with all of your limbs for drawing her blood," he said through gritted teeth.

"HA! As if you could even lay one of your filthy fingers on me!" The angel bellowed, their voice ringing throughout the night. "You'll be the one praying for mercy as I end your pathetic existence— permanently!"

With that, the angel lunged with lethal grace, their blade aimed for Alastor's throat. Alastor sidestepped the attack effortlessly, his movements fluid and unnerving. He moved like a predator that toyed with his prey. This was Alastor completely in his element. And he was beautiful. 

"Stay still!" the angel demanded, lunging again. Alastor avoided them once more, moving like he would on a dance floor.

"Ah, ah, ah!" Alastor teased, wagging a finger like he was chastising a child. "Where would the fun be in that? I thought you wanted a dance!"

Alastor was overconfident and would likely get himself killed if this didn't end soon. The angel slashed at him, managing to bypass Alastor's defense and slice open his cheek. Fucking called it.

"Alastor!" I called, my voice strained with worry. 

His eyes glowed red and the shadows became tinged with green as his power flared. The angel knew they had Alastor where they wanted him— angry and blinded by his need for revenge. Before the ethereal being could strike again, a certain ball of fur darted through the shadows, her tiny form weaving in and out of the chaos. I saw her as she leapt through the air, landing on the angel's back with her needle-like claws and slicing through their wings, effectively saving the day.

[cynical-kitten]

Turns out this dumb bitch isn’t all that dumb. Just received my letter of acceptance from my number one choice for grad school 🥳

[cynical-kitten]

What does it feel like to update your fics on a consistent schedule?

Asking for… a friend.