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it's so bad

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tomorrow i will kill myself

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i stop run away when ppl at the bus stop blocked my way and he repeated come on dont joke honey some old lady was scared when i was struggling from him she tried to stop him and said she will call police but he thrratened me again i went with him 3rd time i feel disgusting my parents hate me mom dont answer im in hospital bc of him how can i still be alive even parents dont care it's not funny I can't do anything he know whefe i am now where i live whefe is my school ehere my bf live where my psrenfs work im so fucking scared he can do smth to them im scsred what he can do with me

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even if he thrratened me it wasn't rape bc i agreed i went eith him its my fault

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when i get out of th r hospigal i will be as fucking drunk as ive ever been

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kms

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John Yuyi for MilkX Taiwan (2021) Photography: Zhong Lin

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it's 2:26 at night i feel so bad i see weird things and voices everything is dark and colorful worms I didn't sleep 5 nights it's 6

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im holding a eallpaper knife in my hand

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they hate me everyone hate me my parents friends boyfriend i hate myself my personalities hate

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i deserve to die or it's too easy and i should live in this hell

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what can i do i really dont know

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what must they thinking abt me im fucking disgusting i should kill myself

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i feel disgusting and shame

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i cant tell sbt that snybdody i csnt even use this word

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he did it again

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i call to my mom but she didn't answer i was bleeding and crying I don't remember what happened later