cursedmask94

[cursedmask94]

honestly tv is really dead. I’m tired of streaming services making those 8 episodes shows that never get the chance to have more seasons after making the audience invested in the characters and also making the cast and creators uncertain and anxious about getting the chance to go back to another season. I miss when we had actual shows with multiple seasons in production from the start to keep the interest going, this format of not quite a show but also not a limited series fucking sucks and I feel so bad for everyone that works for these streamings

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For everyone who didn't like how My Hero Academia ended, what do you think would have been a better ending for it?

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I love making these

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Worlds best worst boyfriend

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I'm just going to give a few more details about my last blind reality shift. I don't have the energy to do a longer post. 1. There was universal health. 2. Everyone had access to the universal ration, so hunger isn't an issue for anyone. 3. Homeless was an issue anymore. 4. There was talk about establishing a basic universal income for everyone.

[cursedmask94]

I just need to get my thoughts together, and I will make a long post about my last blind reality shift.

[cursedmask94]

Oshi no Ko - In defense of Ai's "lies"

Warning: Manga spoilers below.

This post is a reaction to people occasionally saying, "Maybe Ai was the real villain all along" or "But Ai lies" as evidence of her character being sucky. And just... come on. I know, dear reader, that you understand how silly that is but I'm gonna spell it out anyway.

I always want to say in response: "Who did Ai hurt with her lies?" There is one character you may be thinking of and I'll get to that, but the person she hurt the most was herself. Because she told herself nonsense about how she was an irresponsible, dirty liar.

This breaks my fragile heart because this, right here, is the lie. Her negative self-talk stemming from a childhood filled with abuse and loneliness framed her issues with understanding love as if it were her fault and not, I dunno, the woman who fed her glass (see 45510) and abandoned her.

What were Ai's lies? Should they even be classified as such? Let's break it down:

She hid her kids. I would hardly call this a lie so much as a totally normal boundary for a celebrity with a public and private life. It only mattered because of the absurd standards for idols. It was more of a lie by omission anyway, but if someone asked her point blank if she had kids (maybe after one too many times nearly mentioning her kids lol) it would be perfectly acceptable to say no.

She put on a happy face at all times, hiding her emotions. This primarily hurt herself because it increased her social isolation and caused the girls in B Komachi to view her as untouchable and inhuman. Nino wouldn't have been so hurt by their fight if Ai better knew how to express herself, or maybe even if she had shown that she cared by yelling back, but that's a lot to expect from someone with Ai's background and lack of experience with relationships.

There's also Ai's neurodivergence. I don't want to speculate too much about that as I am not hugely familiar with the topic besides what I've learned by googling, but it can cause difficulty with social situations and expressing emotions. Sounds pretty familiar.

We are told in ch 137: "She could neither love nor trust people. She was timid and sensitive. She got hurt after being at odds with her friends. She really was an ordinary girl you could find anywhere. That's why she lied. A big lie that concealed her weak self completely."

Another description for this is a defense mechanism. Ai was not raised in an environment where vulnerability was met with reassurances. Moreover, as an idol it was hammered into her that she needed to hide anything about herself that could be deemed as negative or ugly. Anything that made her human. Ichigo told her at age 12 to lie until she understood love. She was set up from the get go to consider herself nothing but a liar.

She lied to Hikaru when she said, "I can't love you." This is actually not a big lie so much as the most negative take on her emotions. She wasn't sure she could love him but she wanted to. The real untruth is the way she flippantly strolled out the door as if she didn't care about him. But that doesn't make her a villain and her reasons are obvious given everything told to us about her in ch 137 and her avoidant tendencies she used as a shield to protect herself. She handled the breakup with all the grace of an elephant wearing ice skates but I'm not about to blame her for it.

She lied about love. I saved the big one for last. The thing her characterization hinges on. But it was hardly a lie at all. Not only because she actually did love her kids or that she was trying so hard to love which was its own form of love ("lies are love"), but because the idea of having to love her fans in a personal manner that goes beyond appreciation is actually ridiculous.

Nobody expects an office worker to love their clients or someone working at Starbucks to love their customers. But as an idol she was marketed as a perfect, pure girl, someone men could project their fantasies onto and who was supposed to genuinely love each and every one of them in return. It's nonsense. Ai was certainly not the only idol failing to live up to this. She just took it incredibly hard because she felt her lack of understanding of love was a personal failing.

We are told that Ai was a liar but she was honest as often as she hid the truth. She asked Gotanda to film the real her after he called her out about putting on an act. She was candid in the fan Q&A in 45110. In Viewpoint B she wrote a song that expressed her genuine feelings. She adored her kids so much that she slipped up and nearly talked about them on camera. Ai wanted to share how they had impacted her life but couldn't except through veiled statements. She was completely honest with Ryosuke, treating the moment as if she was in a confessional detailing her sins.

None of this is to say Ai was perfect. We're bonked over the head with the fact that Ai was a regular person who could get angry, who was too timid to push herself to connect with her fellow members of B Komachi, who undoubtedly did and said things that did not reflect her best self just as we all do. But I don't think liar is her defining trait. It's probably not even in her top five. I would describe her as sensitive, loving, mischievous, playful, and intelligent (she could be airheaded but she was incredibly savvy about her image) before I'd call her a liar.

There is no Real Villain Ai. And I can't tell you how glad I am that the theory some people held about her forcing sex on Hikaru was thoroughly debunked. Right up there with people speculating that Crow Girl is actually reincarnated Ai. That just made me laugh. The last thing reincarnated Ai would do is jerk her kids around.

We're told Ai was a liar because that's how she viewed herself. It's not an objective fact or at least not a fact that trumps everything else about her. So the next time someone says "Ai was a liar" my response would be "OK. So what?"

[cursedmask94]

your fanfiction is valid

[cursedmask94]

Focus on the result, not the process.

I've spent the last couple days researching LOA and while lurking on r/NevilleGoddard, something clicked for me.

You want the end result, not the process.

Example:

You don't want a job offer, you want a job

You don't a pizza delivery, you want a pizza

You don't want a text, you want attention

You don't want 'symptoms', you want the shift

When attempting to shift, you're paying way to much attention to feeling 'symptoms'. You are acting like the shift is happening in the 3D instead of the 4D.

Remember you are shifting your consciousness not your body. Stop focusing on the act of shifting and start focusing on your life in your DR.

Feel the thoughts and emotions of your DRself. What are your goals for the day, how do you feel about your S/O/BFF, what are you excited about, etc.

Once you shift the 4D, the 3D must reflect it.

"Assume the feeling of your wish is fulfilled and observe the route that your attention follows." -Neville Goddard, The Power of Awareness

[cursedmask94]

I love when trauma makes characters messy. I love when characters don't know how to show love. I love when they lash out. I love when they're vile and break down. I love characters who aren't perfect victims. I love when stories don't excuse behaviour but allow you to understand it

[cursedmask94]

you have free will bro. make multiple drs. have pets in your dr. add your ex into your dr. have your dream wardrobe in your dr. script out that annoying character in your dr. it's your dr.

[cursedmask94]

my friend shifts without even knowing what shifting is

I find it very interesting to tell you about something that happened to my friend few months ago.

We were doing math homework together when, at a certain point, she stops me and says, “Celine, don’t think I’m crazy, but I have something to tell you.” I nod, expecting the worst revelations. She continues, “Sometimes I have dreams that are too realistic, as if they were reality.”

She tells me that she often experiences these dreams, describing them as so real that they feel like actual life. In these dreams, she goes about her normal daily activities: she wakes up, goes to school, travels, and attends concerts. She also mentions that there are small differences: her house is arranged differently, her mom has a different haircut, or she argues with people she hasn’t had conflicts with in real life. However, when she falls asleep in the dream and wakes up, she starts to notice details that don’t add up, like the time on her alarm clock, realizing it was just a dream.

I am convinced that she is unconsciously shifting into parallel realities. I tried to explain a bit about shifting to her, but she remained skeptical.

[cursedmask94]

I'm still going to do a more detailed post later, but I just want to give a quick summary of my last blind reality shift. I spent some time in a reality where if I could describe it with one word, it would be melancholic. It was a reality where, due to a combination of various accidents with biological and chemical agents being released into the environment, large sections of the world were made barren and uninhabitable, and it wqs rare to find an animal large then a dog out in the wild. Most of humanity in that reality was unable to have children, and the few who were able to have children were required to have at least one child.

It was basically kinda of a Children of Men situation in that reality. I think that pretty much sums it up. So I'm just going to give a more detailed post later on.

[cursedmask94]

[cursedmask94]

if you're using the law of assumption and it's not working right away, remember that you're the one in control. it can happen as quickly as you decide. but also keep in mind that you've been holding on to the old story for so long—thinking things like "i can't shift," etc. so, after just a few tries with the law of assumption, it's normal for your 3D reality to still reflect that old story. the key is to persist until your reality changes.

[cursedmask94]

Shifting is your way of stepping into the life you deserve, beyond the limits of this reality. One step closer to the reality you choose. Infinite realities, infinite possibilities.

_YOUR REALITY IS JUST A THOUGHT AWAY_

[cursedmask94]

I'm going to do a more detailed post later about my last blind reality shift, but if i had to sum up the last reality that I went to in one word, it would be it be melancholic.