curse-weaver

[curse-weaver]

Mother.

[curse-weaver]

[curse-weaver]

I keep trying to get it together,

I can only tie it together with string.

[curse-weaver]

300 hours of spider solitaire, maybe more

[curse-weaver]

It only took blood, sweat, ruining my life several time, several years of waiting, two decades of work, the fall of an empire, the loss and reconstruction and loss again and reconstruction again of my humanity, so many deaths I lost count, and tears to figure out what my fucking problem was.

[curse-weaver]

This is how my thought patterns & neuro-pathways feel on a meta/physical level btw. If you even care.

[curse-weaver]

Always awake.

[curse-weaver]

That old man showed up again.

[curse-weaver]

Certainly the results don't lie, but the meta-analysis is subject to human folly, so jot that down.

[curse-weaver]

Men love me for my cadaver swag. The way my skin is cold like a corpse, my off-putting demeanor, and the way I stand in the threshold of the still-living and the dead.

[curse-weaver]

...These were likely already present; hungry, and fatigued from sickness, all of which make it hard to think, make me “tired”. I know that I could rest my eyes and be aggravated by the ending of a conversation arriving too quickly again for our experience. Though I believe right now most of that meeting would be nonsense trying (and failing) to mature anyway.

Survival frustration CNS.J page 68

[curse-weaver]

He kinda went off with referring to our meetings as nonsense trying to mature. He's right. Idek who he is and technically he's one of me but he's right.

[curse-weaver]

Focus on the centre

Make it a stream

It's made of what's consistent

That's solid ground

You can stand on that

[curse-weaver]

why iS HE MULTIPLYING

[curse-weaver]

I'm consistently inconsistent.

[curse-weaver]

looking at the brain with out all the veins in it feels inappropriate...he's naked...

[curse-weaver]

A brain can girate! Start spinning!