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why are you even talking to him… you know he’s doomed by the narrative right

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christmas is great for me cos every other day of the year i embrace my jewish heritage and honour those before me and live the life my racist mother took from me but as soon as i hear micheal fuckin buble in my woolworths my blue eyed blonde hair radical tea blood comes stomping down and im gonna have to sing silent night with my whole gay pussy.

btw i am both jewish and christian in a weird gay liberal way, i do celebrate christmas and eat latkas later, all the fun of the holidays

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"who is that beautiful man in the fanart on my dash": a guide

he looks terrible and he's wearing long flowing robes: that's jesus of nazareth

he looks terrible and he's wearing a green shirt: that's jonathan "jon" sims the archivist

he looks amazing and he's wearing a green shirt: that's armand de vorced

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Oh sure so it's okay for Jesus to raise people back from the dead, but when I, Victor Frankenstein,

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I don't fuck w nerds, the moment I can smell lore correction coming I'm like "Oh Neptune" and I gotta call my mom and ask her to pick me up

If I'm like "I really liked the scene where Gandalf learns the truth about the Ring in the first movie" and someone's like "Oh you mean when he was in Minas Tirith, originally known as Minas Anor when it was first built in the Third Age?" I am pulling the nearest fire alarm

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the phrase "moon's haunted" rewired my brain the moment it entered my vocabulary never in my life have i encountered a phrase more infectious or fun to use

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writing a message on the bullet you're about to use to kill a billionaire who directly fucked millions of people through their health insurance makes you the coolest fucking person on earth I hope you dont get caught

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also let me know if there’s any context e.g. have you had any culinary training etc…. im curious

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Same question I asked the other guy:

Do you marmite?

Yup, love the stuff. I think it's like a lot of things - you generally develop a taste for it as a kid, and if you try it for the first time as an adult it's not particularly pleasant. That said, the whole "love it or hate it" thing is entirely marketing - the majority of people I know are broadly neutral to positive on it, but certainly don't love it.

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Guys. Christmas is coming. Consumerism is in the driver's seat and GAWD don't I know about the existential ennui of all these faceless corporations trying to schill you their wares. It's cold. Impersonal. Bleak.

So I, a fellow tumblr user, will instead try to schill you MY wares, so that when you purchase these items you can say "Hey, that person from tumblr worked on this", and feel the warmth of HUMAN CONNECTION in a way that is completely normal and not parasocial at all. We really are friends. I promise. Yes, you. Love you, bestie. Remember the boop war? Good times. Fond memories.

THIRTEEN STOREYS and FAMILY BUSINESS by Jonathan Sims

Tumblr's favourite Nightmare Factory @jonnywaistcoat has two novels out and they're phenomenal horror that also punch you in the throat with SOCIAL COMMENTARY and FEELINGS. He's so adept at tapping into the specific part of my brain that feels fear like a small child - not the adult creepy scared that I normally get around horror, but specifically the kind of fear that almost freezes your limbs and vocal chords with a terror you don't quite understand because there is so much in the world that you don't know, but you know that somehow this thing might be quick enough or smart enough or sneaky enough to get you before you can get to the safety of your parents sort of fear.

THIRTEEN STOREYS is a haunted house novel, but set in a refurbished block of flats. Each chapter follows a different resident being haunted in a different way, with a style to match the flavour of ghost. It's all tied together phenomenally and brutally.

FAMILY BUSINESS is a story about ghosts in a different way, following a woman who joins a post-mortem house cleaning service while grieving the death of her best friend. But as she removes the stains from the houses of the dead, she begins to suspect something else is removing even more.

Both of these titles are available from Gollancz worldwide!

THE LAST UNICORN, THE WAY HOME, THE INNKEEPER'S SONG and A FINE AND PRIVATE PLACE by Peter S. Beagle

Obviously Peter's work needs no introduction, and our editions aren't available in the US and Canada, but I've had a wonderful time working with Peter and his team to bring these beautiful books back to the UK. Meeting him at Worldcon this year was such a magical moment, and he was jet-lagged and I had gone through sleep deprived into hyper and was bringing an Extremely Weird Energy to every interaction I had that day, resulting in this photo:

THE LAST UNICORN and THE WAY HOME are a matched pair of wonderful fairy stories. THE WAY HOME has two novellettes in it, and the first - 'Two Hearts' - won the Hugo award. It will also destroy you.

A FINE AND PRIVATE PLACE was Peter's first ever novel, and it's wistful and romantic and so beautiful.

THE INNKEEPER'S SONG is his epic fantasy quest, it's an adventure story that reads almost lyrically. Also there's an orgy in the middle which caught me by surprise when I was reading it for the first time on the train into work.

HIGH VAULTAGE by Chris and Jen Sugden

It's possible that someone on this website doesn't know I was involved with this book but don't worry, I will HUNT THEM DOWN AND TELL THEM. This is the first book I took all the way through the editorial process from end to end and I am SO PROUD of it and Chris and Jen and their wonderful world of @victoriocity. Officially one of the seven funniest books published in the UK this year, shortlisted for the Wodehouse Prize for Comic Fiction. It's a chaotic, bonkers murder mystery set in an alternate Victorian London which is the most gleeful dystopia I have ever encountered.

Featuring:

Grumpy Sunshine besties

The Victorian Equivalent of the Chuck Norris Meme

A robot who undertook a course in People Management

An indefatigable beagle

This is another book that you can get from Gollancz all over the world, and you SHOULD because it's amazing. Go into your local bookshop and ask them to order it into stock. It's a great Christmas present. It's my firstborn book baby (like that's a completely normal thing to say when I didn't even write it). Also if you're a fan of the podcast, why not tell the Guardian how great it is, and make a nuisance of yourself until they review. (I would, but the form asks for your name and then they'd know I didn't suddenly discover Victoriocity this year. Either that or think I was a very careless editor.) If you've not listened to the podcast yet, you absolutely should. It pings all my Douglas Adams receptors in the best way. If you like HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE, if you like CABIN PRESSURE, VICTORIOCITY is the perfect addition.

HAMMAJANG LUCK by Makana Yamamoto

SLIGHTLY cheating because HAMMAJANG LUCK isn't out in North America until January (pre-orders make great Christmas presents guys), but it IS out in the UK and the rest of the world next week! This is my second big editorial project and it's a Big Gay Space Heist ft. disaster lesbians, trans characters, and a tech billionaire getting put in his place. It's joyous and energetic and crammed full of Hawaiian pidgin as a love letter to the diaspora. @makana-yama is a phenomenal writer and this is their love letter to their communities, families both born and found, while also a statement on the victims of gentrification (and how those are disproportionally BIPOC communities). PLUS:

friends to enemies to cautious allies to lovers

trans cyborgs

Suck It Space Elon

You know that One Scene in Charlie's Angels where Cameron Diaz is in the white body suit and breaking into the safe and has to stretch out to hit two buttons at once? Yeah. That's the vibe.

Being able to work with Makana is a delight, and HAMMAJANG tapped into all the feelings I got watching LEVERAGE for the first time, so I went to watch it again while I was editing. Also OCEAN'S 8.

DEEP BLACK by Miles Cameron

So, barring Branderson, Miles Cameron may be one of our most prolific authors. He writes a minimum two books a year, one SFF and one historical fiction (as Christian Cameron) and he is... An absolute phenomenon. He IS the Chuck Norris meme. I'm obsessed with him. He's former US military intelligence turned naturalised Canadian Hippy, has written over fifty novels, can turn his hand to any genre and write it fantastically, is a practical archaeologist - running large scale re-enactments from a variety of periods ranging from Bronze Age right the way up to the Victorian era, using traditional techniques to allow academics to study how the practicalities of weapons, clothes, food etc. would have worked in practice. Two years ago he won a medieval combat tournament in Verona, a clear ten years older at least than the next oldest competitor, he teaches Historical European Martial Arts, but ties it into the history of martial arts globally. He can make his own clothes, ink, leatherwork. He's a ballet dancer. I once took him for a day out and he ended it in a different shirt and shoes from the ones he'd started in. I asked him for an author photo and he sent me this:

DEEP BLACK is the sequel to his critically acclaimed SF debut ARTIFACT SPACE, where he has taken his research and experience of global historical cultures and extrapolated to create an interplanetary future where the best of all are celebrated. And then Aliens Happen. And then, in reaction, Capitalism Happens (which is covered in the short story collection BEYOND THE FRINGE).

He's such a thoughtful and erudite speaker, if you're curious about his work, I'd recommend listening to his episodes on the Friends Talking Fantasy podcast, and also his appearance on The Publishing Rodeo.

If SF isn't your bag, he's also got:

Arthurian fantasy

Bronze Age fantasy

Medieval Mages fantasy

A CURSE OF CROWS - Lauren Dedroog

I actually inherited Lauren when a colleague of mine departed for fresh pastures, which gave me the great opportunity to work on this series which is so vastly different from my usual fare. It's epic, sweeping, romantic and lush, with such detailed description and complex political machinations, while also being brutal, dark and heavy (tw: for sexual assault, torture etc, etc.). If you like Sarah J Maas and Cassandra Clare, this should hit the sweet spot. Lauren is an ICU nurse when not writing, and this was somehow created when she was putting in a million hours in hospitals during COVID. The feat boggles my mind.

A CURSE OF CROWS is out now in the UK, Australia and Europe, and it won the People's Choice for Standaard Boek's Book of the Year award in 2023, in her home country of Belgium. It will be hitting shelves in North America next September! A DANCE OF SERPENTS is where I get to pick up the editorial mantle, and that has just landed in my inbox this week so I am excited to dig in.

Featuring:

Harold, they're lesbians

Murder baby is actually a cinnamon roll

Sensitive wings are sexy

For serious, though, I'm lucky enough to work with a lot of authors I'm genuinely obsessed and astounded by. And yes, I do get to work on Joe Abercrombie, Brandon Sanderson and Andrzej Sapkowski, but they're not MY authors - they're led by the incredible Gillian and Marcus who I'm not 100% certain sleep. There are so many people on the Gollancz list who I could recommend for DAYS (and will, if you so request), but this is my stable of superstars.

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your outwardly violent attitude towards any and all romantic & sexual arrangements that don't mirror your good wholesome vanilla monogamous ideal is actually not made quirky and lovable by your queer identity. people who do the "if my partner even asked about polyamory i would buy a gun" schtick on here are pretty functionally identical to straight people who joke about murdering their partners if they came out as bi

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anyways im going to scroll thru my fav ns/fw artist for a bit bcos im annoyed and need serotonin

yknow when one thing happens that rlly just ruins the entire day for you and now youre mute for lord knows how long? yeah

uhg i just got screamed at for… not having a filter, even though this person knows i physically can’t have one?? i hate when ppl say theyre fine with your autism until it actually inconveniences them. Like dont get me wrong i feel bad that it was a burden in the first place but yelling at me for something i cannot control seems pretty shitty. Especially if its something i had no bad will intended.

im sick of ppl thinking im just quirky and weird and not wanting to see that fact that no im just fucking neurodivergent

im so sorry instagram failed you and im not just some silly guy who likes rocks and bugs, im actually a guy who unfortunately doesn’t understand social norms.

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yknow when one thing happens that rlly just ruins the entire day for you and now youre mute for lord knows how long? yeah

uhg i just got screamed at for… not having a filter, even though this person knows i physically can’t have one?? i hate when ppl say theyre fine with your autism until it actually inconveniences them. Like dont get me wrong i feel bad that it was a burden in the first place but yelling at me for something i cannot control seems pretty shitty. Especially if its something i had no bad will intended.

im sick of ppl thinking im just quirky and weird and not wanting to see that fact that no im just fucking neurodivergent

im so sorry instagram failed you and im not just some silly guy who likes rocks and bugs, im actually a guy who unfortunately doesn’t understand social norms.

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Hi 🌟,

I hope you're doing well. We're struggling to reach our fundraising goal to support my family and me during these difficult times in Gaza. We've only raised a small amount so far, and your help could make a big impact. 🙏

If you can't donate, could you please help by sharing or reblogging my pinned post? Spreading the word would mean so much to us. 💪

Pinned post: https://www.tumblr.com/ahmedharara/757031731268386816/weve-been-able-to-raise-only-120-so-far?source=share

Donation link: https://gofund.me/f751a38a

Thank you so much for your kindness and support! ❤️

hi!!!! unfortunately i cant donate but please for anyone seeing this do donate if you can!!!!

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If the podcast ain’t about a stressed-out British man who doesn’t know what the hell is going on, then I don’t want it…

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uhhhmmmm anyways heres the summery for the fic im working called “blue” (may change, just a lil placeholder for now yippee)

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hello lovelies!! quinn here!!!!

so, uhhhhhh sorry i havent been active?

you see, i havent been doing okay, and like thats a whole bucket of worms i will NOT open.

i do want to talk about sslily?

so i have not abandoned or left it to rot, despite it being months, chapter 2 is in the works however whilst writing chapter 2 multiple devastating events have happened to me and, you see, i have ocd. and my ocd has decided to blame myself for those events because… i worked on chapter 2? logically thats very very silly and its very coincidental that it happened but you have to understand, i wrote 200 words, went to bed, and woke up to my place being robbed.

so yeah, i will continue to write for it however i want to when im more mentally… sound?

uhhmmmm however i have been writing bit of a vent fic involving Martin and my weird hatred for the colour blue. so uhm maybe ill publish that once im done