crystalconfusions

[crystalconfusions]

The outfit manager evolution is the worst evidence of what extended proximity to Hans Capon does to a serf

KCD1

Pleb. Basic white boy. Called the teacher “mom.” Trifler. Can’t fuck.

KCD2

Sir Bitchoff of Cuntington, Esteemed Bailiff of the Dutchy of Pussville by way of Ballervale

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[crystalconfusions]

Good Evening to all 4 people in the KCD tags

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Do you know how I feel right now. I am a chronic rarepair fan and I have NEVER had a ship go canon. Now I am, as a humble lifelong medieval history nerd, after SEVEN YEARS of dev silence (and <20 fics on ao3 last time I checked, many written my yours truly), witnessing the altright fandom melt down into nuclear waste in real time. Because their ~antiwoke hero~ studio just dropped a major sequel confirming my ultra rarepair lgbtq+ nothingburger never-gonna-happen ship was endgame all along. I could bend steel with my pinkies. This is my Roman empire. This is video game Christmas to me. I am unkillable right now do you understand

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the groundhog reportedly saw "a blood red sun. in the foreground a massive wheel framing the sun in the sky. the wheel has ceased to turn". nobody is sure what this means but its probably fine

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why the hell am i getting suggested a bunch of christianity posts on here?? i keep clicking 'not interested' yet they keep coming

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"it was in 2020" oh so like a year or so ago. a couple years. im sorry 5? did you just say five? five years ago ?

[crystalconfusions]

[remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health] YOU should kill yourself

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i explained the concept of freaking it to my 15,000 year old grandfather and he remained motionless within the glacier

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Found several packs' worth of pokemon cards strewn across a target parking lot and took a pic to show my friends without realizing how much my outfit elevated the scene to "aftermath of a wizard duel"

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i dont know what this means but it has to mean something.

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your unreliable narrator fucking bit me

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compilation

[crystalconfusions]

too many movies have been ruined by not casting ugly people