cryptiql

[cryptiql]

Can I just say the way u write is so beautiful like the way u describe things is so magical

this is probably so late i am so so sorry 😭 but thank you so much, it always means a lot to hear that <3

[cryptiql]

no way u just compared my writing to one of tumblr’s it girls i’m flattered omg thank u ,, and as always ur tags r ridiculous 💀👎🏽 fym u want that on ur tombstone are u deranged 😭😭😭

we. are going to ignore that this has been collecting dust in my inbox!!! and ofc i did?? i don't compare people to him lightly, u deserved it 🤨 OKAY YEAH they are but i'm always right sooo idk what to tell u

[cryptiql]

hurts like hell⠀ ꕤ⠀e. kirishima

ෆ note: i haven’t written in ages so this is a little rusty. fairest of warnings. enjoy :) wc: .06k.

his gaze is empty. haunted beyond despair and uncharacteristically broken, dark circles hang underneath his eyes like stalactites.

“eijirou…?”

he’s not sure if the blood on his hands belongs to him.

“i’m a hero, right? i save people everyday. i go home, i wash the dirt and grime off, and—and i do it again the next morning.”

his gestures are erratic now, panicked as he hunches over himself. dark red fingerprints stain his tattered clothing, drying in horrifying patterns over his skin as well. is he okay? he’s not sure. he’s not sure. he’s not—

“because that’s what heroes do, right? but this—but you—you weren’t in the fucking job description!”

the grated edge to his voice makes you wince, and then groan at the uncomfortable twinge in your chest. something… hurts, but you can’t place the pain just yet.

“sorry—i’m sorry,” he’s quick to scramble to your side, and you can just about make out his state or anguish through the faint light trickling in from behind him. he sniffles once, twice. blood smears on his cheek when he wipes a lone tear away.

explosions sound off in the distance. he flinches—a strangled gasp of resignation, and rakes trembles hands through his hair.

“why’d it have to be you?” it’s blurted out selfishly, still trying to grasp at the bits of a fantasy still hanging on one hinge. it makes you look away from him briefly. “i gave you everything, i—loved you! i loved you, and you used me!”

you can’t meet his gaze. but he knew what you were, didn’t he? it wasn’t your fault he assumed everything would be better because he thought he could change you ‘for the better’. his heart was too big, too trusting, too optimistic, too much, just too much–

more expulsions go off, closer this time. your earpiece crackles to life as dust rains from above, coating everything in its wake in ash gray. he tries again, to meet your gaze as you wincing and try to sit up once again. you refuse.

silence hangs heavily in the in between, daunting. a soundless countdown to the inevitable. and when you finally do, your voice cracks when you speak up.

“eijirou, i—”

“go.”

you balk in surprise as more ash coats the area surrounding them. go? it couldn’t be that easy. surely he would bait you to go, and then turn you into the pros just as planned, and you’d spend your life behind bars–if not for the crimes you’d committed, then for breaking japan’s sweetest hero’s heart with little remorse. eijirou could end your life right now even if he didn’t turn you in, so why…

why does he still look like he still loves you?

you can’t do this anymore. not when he looks at you like you’re still the only in the world he trusted and believed in. not when he looks like it’s tearing him apart to make you leave, to run off and charm someone else into your trap. it’s what you did. you couldn’t stop.

not when you had your own debts to pay.

so you slowly drag yourself up and limp towards the exit, tasting salt on your lips. eijirou doesn’t say a word when you pass in front of him, and neither does he call out after you to try and change your mind.

do you think you could stay? he’d asked you once, back when secrets were still secrets and hearts weren’t such fragile things. his smile had been blinding, grin so wide and unashamedly full.

poor eijirou. not knowing the duality of his word choice, then. you couldn’t blame him for keeping his gaze on the colorless ground instead of watching you walk out.

you spare him one last glance before vanishing into the cellar below.

(less than a few minutes later, katsuki barges through the ceiling with a deafening yell. he looks around desperately for who he knew would be there, and resists the urge to light the entire fucking establishment on fire.

“where the hell are they?”

he crowds into his space, dust clinging to cracked gauntlets and furrowed brows. searing hot palms light up in disbelief, but he barely flinches.

eijirou looks like a ghost. red hair dulling against the gray walls, he blends into the dirty almost seamlessly. katsuki bristles with anger, because it doesn’t take much to put two and two together.

the next time he’d see you, he’d make sure you paid for the shit you’d started.)

thank you for reading ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭ reblogs are appreciated!

[cryptiql]

PRAYING FOR JULY.

muriel x gn!reader . . spoilers for muriel's route ahead, proceed with caution !

a/n: this is more of a drabble than anything because i've been putting it off for too long, but i definitely hope to write for him more

muriel had learned to lie in passiveness, back bowed for the devil to give him his lashes. his eyes burned, and he bled—bled and wept with the same raw, warm red that kissed the ground he bore his hands into, searching for a place to rest. he’s bitter—all of him, ash on the tongue that speaks his name as though it was worth being spoken at all—and gods, he feels pathetic clawing at the moss, silently begging to be good enough for someone, anyone, even the earth below. would it take me, if i asked? it’s silly, he thinks he hears a reply rooted in the soil that clots beneath his fingernails, but it’s barely there. he has to wonder if he’s imagined it all as he sits back on his heels, breathing ragged. not yet. not now.

january unfurls like a slow storm, and muriel tries to forget.

he wishes it were as simple for him as it were for you. he almost succumbs to the swarm of the market in his hesitation, glancing over his shoulder at watch you spin round in circles aimlessly. you wouldn’t find him. not that you knew who he was, or would want to anyhow. you could always try, but muriel hates how you try to pick him out, blood-stained, monstrous and all, like the mere sight of him isn’t a curse enough. you weren’t supposed to remember him. what hurts more is that you look relieved to see him again, the brilliance of your smile flickering to a dull shine as you feel his wounds like fruit, patient in how you guide him to sit still, a damp cloth pressed to his skin. 

you’ll leave him in february, he tells himself. gone by morning, the memory of him rotting in the far corners of your mind. you hold the myrrh to your chest like you can’t bear the thought of losing it, and muriel pretends like he doesn’t care, even if his heart knows better, clenching once, twice, three times. if you catch his lie, you don’t press it—only wrap the green scarf around him, fingertips smoothing the fabric over his chest in featherlight touches, as if to say “you’re worth it”. you give him every chance to pull away, and muriel takes it more times than he’s proud to admit, but that doesn’t change how every part of him aches in regret. 

he can’t take the words back now, but he can try to be better. he wants to be better for you. muriel could be like spring, pure and beautiful, marching sluggishly along under the waning moon, but he’s still not there yet. he can’t force the ugly, loathsome thing trapped between his ribs to settle when you curl up beside him on the floor, not anymore than he can force you to run like he told you to. you don’t need to know that he dreamt of you that night; oil on skin, pinks and yellows bleeding into the sky, your lips molded to the shape of his neck. he doubts you would listen, though you say otherwise. 

so when muriel feels april approaching, he starts to trust you; wholly, using every waking moment to pray he won’t be sorry. he could die here, the shadows growing darker behind his eyes as lifetimes whirl past him in a blur, never knowing how grateful you are to share this one with him. maybe it’s just enough that he feels loved in this moment, however often the ghost of himself says it won’t last. 

but the hatchet is buried, isn’t it? more than that—he feels clean, mind, body and soul, and if you could hold them all in the palm of your hand, he wouldn’t even flinch. muriel thinks he can understand now, why you cried for him; why it mattered that he wasn’t afraid of you, and what a surprise that was, because how could he ever fear you? how, when you touched him so tenderly, even after all he’d done, murmuring litanies of praise into the spaces where only he could hear, “i love you”s traded between your bodies? muriel can’t remember all the months that passed, but july is always there in the forefront of his mind, a grained photograph of forking roads and lush verdure leading back home. 

the pale, wonted blues and grays had turned to gold, veiled thinly in a warm orange glow. against the nearest wall there stands a chair draped in tapestries yet to be hung, and muriel’s free hand reaches out to trace their decorative patterns. his trail stops at the crest of a bear’s head, crowned in flowers, and his lips twitch into a small smile. you grumble incoherently from beneath the weight of his bicep, curled around your head to pull you closer into his hulking form, and muriel chuckles, finally sinking into the bed. the mattress groans weakly as he rolls onto his back, and you take the opportunity to rest your chin on his chest, gazing up at him blearily. 

whatever you aim to say in the first few seconds, muriel doesn’t bother trying to translate—with it being nothing more than a string of jumbled garbling, he doesn’t think he’d be able to anyway—but when you manage to gather your senses, it’s well worth the wait.

“i love you.” muriel cranes his neck to look at the ceiling, hoping it will hide his blush, but it’s a poor attempt at best. you hum into his collarbone with amusement, fingers threading through his hair and tugging gently as if to tell him “look at me”. the things you don’t say, muriel finds, speak volumes. he complies eventually, albeit with a pout that is quickly ushered away by your lips on his, the first signs of dawn pouring from your lazy movements. 

“i love you,” he whispers in reply, thumbing your cheek before kissing you once more. muriel thinks it could be december by the time he pulls away, flushed and panting softly. then, you hook your leg around his middle to pull him flush against you, sighing into the heat of his mouth and reminding him that summer is just over the bend. inanna grants you both this mercy by keeping to her rug by the fire, and muriel silently gives his thanks while tugging the covers over your bodies. from the corner of the window, he can see the lemon tree flourishing, and it’s just like he dreamt: oil on skin pinks and yellows bleeding into the sky, your lips molded to the shape of his shoulder. morning yawns across the horizon, and muriel lies with you like it’s all he’s ever known, and it’s all it ever should have been. 

sleep comes easier in july.

© cryptiql 2022. please refrain from copying to other sites.

[cryptiql]

get your cracker off my fyp 😒

you first with yours 🙄

[cryptiql]

UM YOUR BLOG THEME AS MY BF HAS ME LEVITATING <333

THANK YOUU I KNEW YOU'D LIKE IT >:)

[cryptiql]

url change !!

katsvgous ➜ cryptiql

moots please reblog for a kiss on the forehead and a fresh loaf of bread <3

[cryptiql]

ahem. if ur hot go follow my new main >:)

@viktwh0res

moots please rb!!

[cryptiql]

i haven't seen ur face reveal omg :(( but u were super cute from what i remember, you had like really light brown hair almost like blonde?? and brown eyes and you were wearing a pretty green hoodie that i totally didn't steal and wear <3

dw about it, it's old and ugly so i might post a new one at some point or just dm you a picture <//3 LMAO irl my hair is really dark around the roots and blonde at the tips from when i dyed it a couple years back, and my eyes are grayish blue. but i do have a green hoodie from grad >:)

[cryptiql]

DEAD SERIOUS !! like at first it was just us texting and being all cute (as usual) and then u like ?? came to my house and we hung out, ofc i showed u off to everyone cuz i love u, and i finally got that cuddle session i wanted 😋 then i woke up 💔💔

damn why can't i have dreams about you like that 😔💔 BUT THAT'S SO CUTE WAHH i can't wait to do that with you irl. but i'm curious, what did i look like?? idk if you saw my face reveal from a while back lmao

[cryptiql]

you’re such an idiot. i will literally kiss you on the mouth.

[cryptiql]

I DID DREAM OF US but it didn't involve sailors </3

WAIT YOU'RE SERIOUS???? tell me all about it,,

[cryptiql]

passionately makes out w you ok goodnight ily

goodnight i hope you dream of us dancing under starlight on a ship while dressed as sailors <3

[cryptiql]

dreary days

[cryptiql]

ALSO WERE U THAT ONE ANON THAT SENT ME THAT THINGY

i was waiting for you to figure it out 🙄

[cryptiql]

i was gonna send u the essay i made about how much i love u but 🙄🙄 u answered late so take these

WWJGHWKWH I?@?@ i need to get up earlier so i'm not leaving you on the line like that I'M SO SORRY 😭

[cryptiql]

i'm going on a killing spree do y'all want anything