cryinginabottle - Tumblr blog

[cryinginabottle]

Do you ever feel so sad? Very sad until u “shrink”..? Smaller and smaller and smaller.. you’re getting smaller. Like your emotions squeeze you and because you are now just a tini tiny thing, you screams pent. And your tears can’t stop pouring

And realize you never forgive yourself, never loved yourself sincerely

You always hate yourself hardly. Maybe more than God hates you

[cryinginabottle]

Please help me.

[cryinginabottle]

From the First Page

From the first page,

that’s me, who always imperfect, trying to be perfect and good enough for this society. With so many flaws that I know, that’s bad. I’m a person who has a bunch of bad habits. Nobody will like this including my self. I hate myself and no matter what, I always can point out my ugly personality.

From the first page,

that’s me, who always search for happiness, who always pretend to find it. Pretending to be happy, and all is well. And I can smile no matter what. Sadness is bullshit. And I find you. I think you’ll need me.. The uninmportant and imperfect me.

From the first page,

that’s me, who always try to impress you. Trying to get your heart. I’m trying so hard to make you happy, including my own feelings about how sad I am when you didn’t recognize me, when you don’t wanna talk to me, when I know the fact that you didn’t need me. 

I’m crying alone everyday, blame myself about how stupid I am, who always broke my own hardworks and repeat it. I blame myself everyday who always be ignorant girl. I ask myself, 

Am I worthy enough to be loved? 

I have not find the answer yet. And my heart brokes everytime I know that actually nobody loves me.