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cruzerforce4256 · 25 days ago

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Thank you... for playing with me.

Batfam x F!Reader Squid Game AU

m.list|prev|fin.

"Hyeya, how are you trying to leave me? You mercilessly say goodbye with those smiling eyes. Killing me and taking my breath away. The happiness that melody once gave us is still so bright. Please don't leave me, don't leave me" 'Y Si Fuera Ella' by Jonghyun (SHINee).

Divider Creds: @cafekitsune and @k1ssyoursister

It was too late, she was nothing but anther body covered in blood. All those false promises of getting her out of there were for nothing.

Barbara stopped typing for a moment. Was it even worth it now? The silence from the intercom was deafening.

Until a static cut it.

“How close are we from finding the destination?”

“A minute”

She said out loud, It's a little sad now. She was so close yet so far if [name] had held out for a few more minutes.

“Then we’ll have to get a move on.”

“This is the game place, it's giving me the creeps.” Stephanie shuttered, they finally managed to find the damn place and two were left uninformed that someone who resided among them once was dead.

“You can say that again, I think what sucks even more than that though is the amount of people we lost, damn Court of the Owls…” Cassandra followed, then finally finished their section of searching for people and headed back to the main room.

“Find anything?” Bruce asked. The others seemed tense, he did, too, but he always did. That's if you didn't know him very well. His kids, on the other hand, raised an eyebrow.

“No… I heard [name] was here. I hope she's recovering well. Can we visit her?”

"About that, there's no way to say this, [name]'s dead."

Sometimes it was hard for Jason to sleep with all his trauma keeping him up at night.

Sometimes he’d walk to the manor kitchen if that night he decided to stay the night, maybe grab a glass of water, and hope that would calm his nerves.

Sometimes he'd see [name] there, she always looked in a daze and wouldn’t notice him.

Sometimes he'd want to talk to her.

But he’d never go for it, as he was tired, and she was a daughter of the woman who took advantage of Bruce.

Today, he decided to go for it, just his luck, she was right there.

He approached and tapped her on her shoulder, and before she could turn around-

His alarm went off.

It’s been a month since he has seen her alive. To be fair, though, he could visit her every day if he wanted to; her gravestone won’t be moving anytime soon, and neither would she.

Jason sat up and rubbed his eyes, he looked around and nothing had changed. If anything everyday was normal, a quiet house as you’d imagine vigilantes don’t make that much sound and it’s ingrained in them, making it the norm for their gothic mansion to be silent.

But just a few years ago would he wake up, not from his alarm but rather the sound of a girl running up and down and making something in the kitchen, and while it should have made him a little annoyed, he felt at peace at times, maybe this is what a normal life would be like, waking up to go to school rather than suiting up and making sure that Gotham was safe.

And so the first month without it, weird but whatever. A year, used to the silence now. Now, three years later. Why, he can’t help but miss it.

As he finally made up his mind to get his day started he passed the family portrait, but she wasn't there, he never minded before, so today should be no different… at least it should be.

He couldn’t be melodramatic, though; he couldn’t just pass her room and reminisce about false memories as she was hidden away in that lousy guest room, out of sight, out of mind.

For once, he decided that he’d go to that hallway, to the room, and take a peek.

Stumbling on Dick he seemed to have just crashed at her room since no one was occupying it.

The room wasn’t dirty or dusty, it just seemed empty. Alfred always made sure that every room was clean, even if it’s empty or unused.

Dick had always prided himself on being the most reliable sibling, he always tried to make sure to be on top of things, which sometimes led to overworking himself.

Sometimes, getting coffee from the kitchen would be his routine.

Sometimes he’d spot [name] also grabbing a cup of coffee, typing away on her old, broken laptop.

Sometimes he would want to offer to go and hang out to buy a new one, but… she’d probably put up a front of being a broke, struggling girl.

Besides, he’s busy; after all, he came for only one purpose, and being sidetracked would not help.

Now, while he’s grabbing coffee, there would be no girl stressed over normal stuff, typing away on her crumbling laptop and so focused in.

Maybe, if he had just said something to her, maybe he would’ve gotten over this misdirected hatred, that was never even there.

He still felt conflicted at this new development with [name] being dead and all, and once again overworked himself, out of pure curiosity, he went to her room and could only stare at how sad it looked, no decorations or traits that even implied someone lived there.

Collapsing onto her small bed he had let his tiredness take over holding onto the one thing she did leave behind, a stuffed llama, she had to sew it back together a couple of times after Damian would ruin it and eventually just left it.

Now it’s cotton stuffed insides emptied, and its once pink clean coat is stained as if left on the ground and stepped on.

It was the first and last thing her mother and Bruce had gotten her together, it’s the only connection she had to this family.

So now, blinking open his eyes, he picked up the llama that seemed to bore it’s beady eyes at him as he stared back only to leave soon after and catch a glimpse of Damian and Titus at the family couch, Titus sitting next to Damian let out a bark acknowledging Dick making Damian turn over to look at him.

That’s right, Dick always made excuses for Damian didn’t he?

He’s nothing more than a sad excuse for a big brother, huh [name]?

Damian had this problem of collecting animals like he was a Disney princess, that, and the fact that he felt proud that he had the Wayne flowing through him, making him the actual son of Bruce Wayne, and is the current Robin.

Sometimes he’d go past the kitchen.

Sometimes he’d see [name] making herself something to eat.

And from what he heard from the story’s told by the others she was just like her mother, a gold digging girl.

That made him upset in some way that they shared the same blood, and while she got everything and still wanted more he was different in that spectrum, he had a hard childhood, and is still unable to reach that level of having a normal one.

In some moments, though, he would see this scene and wonder about what-ifs.

What if she could’ve just been content with her life and not been greedy?

What if they bonded and she showed him what a normal life would be like?

But those what-ifs never went into action.

Depending on how upset he was, he’d maybe take action on blowing off some steam, and last time he checked, he didn’t get punished, is it that bad?

Sometimes, maybe Bruce would try to say something, but he knew that someone would come to his defense.

As he sat on the couch, it seemed Titus was starting to get hungry, and he knew Titus was not one to wait, and headed to the kitchen.

There he saw Tim staring off into [name]’s empty hallway, more like a guest hallway.

Tim has always prided himself on being at least what he thinks is the smartest. He knew his way through technology and was clever.

However, he could never understand [name].

For someone who was always ungrateful, why did she look so… pitiful?

It was in those moments that he would see her.

Sometimes he’d be tired from a long day and want to just slam himself onto his bed.

Sometimes, while heading to his room, he’d see [name].

Those memories never stuck with him, though, as they were more like fleeting moments that he now could only look back on.

Walking across the hallway, he saw Duke.

Duke… Well, he didn’t know you, but to be fair, who did? He never spoke about you, nothing good, nothing bad.

The first time he did, it was to defend you on why you were here; he had talked to you once or twice before getting snatched by someone else, so, no, he didn’t know you… But if you gave him a bit more time.

Maybe he could’ve.

There are many things he could’ve done in his life. Once he did speak to [name].

“Why look back on something you can’t change? That’s something many people tell you, but it’s hard, isn’t it?” She tilted her head; she wasn’t smiling, but she wasn’t trying to be rude either.

He wasn’t sure what led up to this moment on how they were able to talk but they did and that question stuck with him.

And now he can’t help but wonder, could you also be referring to how they treated you in the manor?

Blaming you for your mother's actions?

He headed off to the garden, where you once had grown these flowers, and now Alfred took care of them, but some, unluckier than others, wilted.

Flowers are not needy things, they just require little attention to live and survive.

He stumbled onto Barbara, who held a wilted purple hyacinth.

Barbara, never in her million years, would take the time to stop and smell the flowers with the amount of responsibilities she has, on top of the ones she puts on herself.

But it was [name]’s garden she was in, and maybe it wouldn’t hurt to take some time for herself.

Entering in this ethereal place that seemed out of place compared to the rest of the house it wasn’t terrible, and somehow some were still alive.

The place was out of a fantasy novel, especially with conditions Gotham is in, flowers, plants, even a huge cherry blossom tree, and a bonsai tree were there in an arranged circular way with the center bring marble with a supplies there are right next to the podium that had sunlight shining directly on it.

Purple Hyacinths

Meaning: Regret

Below that was the description on how that flower got its meaning from a Greek story but Barbara stopped reading the rest of it but mainly focused on the meaning.

Regret, it’s a terrible emotion.

It could be missing a single item from your bag and having to go back and get it, but for Barbara, she had too many regrets to just focus on one. Until [name]’s death, she had been the one tracking the location, so she thought maybe they’d make it in time; she hadn’t known that the last time she would see [name], it would be a corpse rather than alive.

Not like that had made any difference, as when she was still alive, she still treated her like she was 6 feet under already, so why had it mattered now? Was it guilt? Was it sadness?

Was it regret?

All she could take away was that her younger sister, whom she never gave an effort to care about, was now dead; she was dead with no one by her side to mourn her death, except after her death.

It wasn’t fair, and it would never be.

She walked up to a book crate that was under the bonsai tree.

[Name]’s plant and journey entries, starring my plants!!!

This was the most recent book.

“Today I checked up on my new plant… It’s a Hyacinth! Not just any, but a purple one. I’m hoping this one grows really huge. Another addition to the never-ending collection. Even though I’m graduating this year, it feels like just yesterday when I started this little green house of mine. I’ll be turning 18 this year, hopefully that doesn’t change anything. It’s still been years since anyone from this house has made proper conversation with me, hopefully that means they’ll also forget that I live here and let me mooch off them a wee bit more.

I know that sounds bad but with the amount of money I’ve been raking up from the part time job I’ve had since freshman year would probably last a good year at home, hopefully if I go to a college that provides dorms, or at least a cheap price for them.

I think that’s enough ranting for now, my hand is starting to cramp with the amount of writing that I’m doing.

Love,

{name}

It seemed that [name] either didn’t feel the need to pack anything from her garden with her before getting kicked out, except a cactus.

Barbara remembered her leaving with that.

But everything else, including her journals, all her plants, was left, discarded.

She may have seen Alfred in here once or twice a month but even then he’s a busy man, the only servant of the Wayne house, surely it’s hard enough taking care of their needs on top of some plants.

Everybody has their unique handwriting, and Barbara couldn’t help but admire hers.

She set the book down where it was originally, looking around again to see a withered flower.

“Today I checked up on my new plant… It’s a Hyacinth! Not just any, but a purple one. I’m hoping this one grows really huge. “

That’s right, this was new, wasn’t it?

Now all she held up was a flower that should be thrown away, she admired it, it was more like a weed than a flower. Meaning it had withered long ago.

However, it contrasts with the blue flowers next to it.

Forget Me Nots

Meaning: Never be forgotten

Dusting off her clothes, be left [name]’s once sanctuary and headed off.

“You won’t forget me, will you? I’ve always wanted to have a playdate with you…

Barbara.”

Barbara hurriedly turned around and somehow a Forget Me Not was in front of her, the rest were all in the same place they usually were.

She picked it up and grazed a petal.

Before feeling a tear slide down her cheek, the rest did not follow.

“Of course not, how could I ever forget?”

Speaking of flowers, wasn’t Cassandra buying some flowers right about now?

Cassandra had a knack at reading how people felt, it was quite easy as their body language gave it away.

Either she never cared enough to see [name]’s or the fact that she never gave off any sort of sign.

“Ma’am?”

Cassandra looked up at the florist.

“Any specific flowers you are looking for?”

Now, back to reality, Cassandra took a deep breath and scanned over the flowers in the shop. She had no clue what to get you… Did you like daisies? Maybe sunflowers?

“Do you have any recommendations? I lost someone close to me, and I have no idea what to get her.”

“Another one in these streets, ay?” The florist tried to make small talk, but it seemed Cassandra was still in a daze, so she left her alone and started wrapping a bouquet for her.

Cassandra was born to be made a weapon, a hard tear-jerker kind of story that she tries not to dwell on, and meeting Bruce Wayne had been one of the best things she’d have to say that had happened in her life.

He wasn’t her dad, but he was, and didn’t mind that, and through him she had more family members that she would ever want, but it seems she enjoyed it.

“32.67, ma’am.” She took out her wallet and gave the florist $50, grabbing the flowers, leaving the rest of the change.

Irises. Did you like Iris? You always were there, and then you weren’t, you weren’t watering your garden anymore, you weren’t cooking something that she’d once or twice take a few bites of without anyone knowing, and you weren’t dancing to songs anymore.

She wondered if she had a normal life, would you do ballet with her?

Sometimes, she would take sneak peaks at you when you’d do ballet.

Her favorite was when you do ‘La Esmeralda: Variation’ she loved that version the most even if it was super popular but you couldn’t blame her, it wasn’t just a form of dancing it was an art, it was graceful, and enjoyed each tap that sounded on the tambourine and the fluid motions that [name] seemed to express.

Sometimes she would worry when [name] collapsed before getting up once again. At times, she’d want to stop you, but retreat before even approaching you.

A sound of the phone ringing snapped her out of daydreaming.

“Hey, you coming soon?” Stephanie softly spoke into the phone. It seemed that she hadn’t arrived at their destination not too long ago.

“Yeah, just picked up the flowers.” Stephanie hung up after they said their byes and stared at the view in front of her. It was spring, and the new flowers that blossomed off the trees were detaching off allowing her to admire the petals that decorate [name]’s tomb.

When was the last time they spoke in a normal, positive light?

She kneeled and repositioned [name]s’ outdated photo frame, and stared at it for a good second before brushing some dirt off the stone.

“It’s been a few months hasn’t it? I would have never imagined to see you like this, you were always such a hard worker. Cass is coming soon, so you won’t be too lonely anymore.” she heard footsteps approaching and saw Jason coming which had mildly surprised her.

“Almost thought you were Cass for a second.”

“She could only wish she were as cool as I.”

“How is Bruce holding up?”

“I’m not sure.”

“You know this isn’t healthy.”

Bruce didn’t direct his attention to the voice,

The voice that haunts him.

“I’m not real, and the more that I stick around, the more it’ll negatively affect you. Just give it up. I’m dead.” The ghostly figure got up and looked around the room.

“It must’ve been nice, you know, to see me shot dead.”

“It wasn’t.” His throat bobbed as he swallowed.

“Very convincing, your voice, that tone, it definitely made me believe you.” The entity mocked.

“So now what, you’re just going to keep hallucinating me talking to you? C’mon, you’re the Batman, losing one illegitimate kid won’t kill you, and besides, it’s not like you tried to be a good father in the first place, why try now when the corpse is already frozen.”

That’s right, isn’t it, you were dead and he was breathing, alive, warm.

“Should I call you Bruce? You never liked being my father.” She circled his chair, fading in and out of the room.

“Master Bruce, you should get some rest, it’s not good to overwork yourself, the case over… well, it’s over take a breather before another one.” Alfred approached, ushering him to his room.

As he settled into his bed, leaving him once again with himself and a voice and figure that resembled his lovely, dead daughter.

“If you’re not real, then could you at least stay with me a little longer?”

“Sure.”

[END]

Sorry if this wasn't the final part you wanted, but I'll be honest and say I didn't know how else to add another part. Astro will definitely have more lore and parts, because... well,l our MC is alive in that universe, so stay tuned for that.

I think I'll be doing a rewrite of SMM, which no one asked for, and then I'll try to start working on my WSMCBH. I have the plot for the next chapter yet every time I seem to try and write something my mind goes blank, anyway, YIPPIE school's almost out!!

Taglist time! ❤

Also, I love the idea and from fic from both @jellyfishmoon97 and @not-weirdoshrek, and a new addition that I'm super happy I bumped into @alilobsessive.

@holysoulsweets @sh4rk-k1d @sillysealsies @loomspuddle @cantfindmelol @alwaysholymilkshake @leitor-sonolento @randomlyappearingartist @beyondblissxoxo @sirairi @yhin-gg @frankie-moon3 @welpthisisboring @yokesmam @bat1212 @enchantingarcadecreation @twismare @delias-stuff @ladylupuscrow @ferchu0406 @c4xcocoa @cruzerforce4256 @anonymoushehehehe @godoreo22 @blerp-22 @facelessisnthere @sirenetheblogger @themightybee4067 @boredselkie @tiffyisme3760 @random4137 @midnightgrimoire @mybones537 @chaoticmoontimetravel @jsprien213 @czarinera @exactlynumberonekryptonite @gwyneveire @k-anaru @a-lurking-fae @ryuushou @lizzy-innet

I think that's everyone who wanted to be tagged. I hope I didn't spell any words wrong and tag the wrong person.

Any mistakes, plot holes, corrections, and especially interactions mainly comments are appreciated!!!

Also realized @k1ssyoursister literally has DC divider so will be using those soon 👏😏👏

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cruzerforce4256 · 25 days ago

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🤣🤣😭😭😭

DINNER WAS NOT SERVED

Pairing: Dick Grayson x Reader

divider by: @cafekitsune & @iydiamartinx word count: 842 synopsis: Dick had one goal: to seduce his girlfriend. He forgot the part where he should check for unwanted guests first and narrates his plans in very, vivid detail. warning: talk of sexual themes

Dick Grayson practically bounced through the door. After a brutal day at work and a rare night off from his more nocturnal duties, he was beyond ready to spend the night with you—to the fullest.

He wasn’t even trying to be subtle about it—keys flung onto the counter, boots kicked halfway off, jacket tossed somewhere near the coat rack. His hair was tousled from the wind, and that boyish grin was plastered across his face like he’d just won the damn lottery.

“Babe?” he called out, already unbuttoning his shirt to reveal that smooth, unfairly sculpted chest. “I’ve been thinking about you all day. You have no idea what you’re in for tonight.”

You glanced up from the couch, eyes widening in horror.

Too late.

“Been thinking about that mouth of yours,” Dick continued, blissfully unaware of the audience. “You saying my name, choking on it… You better not have eaten yet,” he smirked, prowling closer. “Because tonight, I’m the only thing on the menu. And if you’re really good, I’ll make you my dessert before tying you up like you asked—”

You opened your mouth—something, anything—but the words got stuck somewhere between your brain and your mortified soul.

Dick wasn’t done.

“—And if I do it right, baby,” he added, voice dropping into something criminal, “you won’t be walking straight tomorrow.”

“Please,” Tim begged, his voice hollow—like something inside him had just broken. “Stop.”

Dick screeched.

His head snapped up like a man slapped by God himself.

Jason was sprawled across the other couch, mid-bite of pizza, now frozen with a look of stunned horror.

Tim was slouched in the armchair, pale as death and clutching a throw pillow to his chest like it might protect him from the trauma.

Damian sat cross-legged on the floor, one eyebrow twitching in confused revulsion. “What… what do you mean by that?”

Dick flailed like a man caught with his pants around his ankles—and spiritually, he was. “I—You—WHY ARE YOU ALL HERE?!”

Jason stood up slowly, face blank. “No. Absolutely not. I’m done. I’m leaving. My ears are bleeding. I need holy water. Maybe therapy. And a priest.”

Tim slowly turned to you, deadpan. “You asked for that?”

“I didn’t know he was going to narrate it like a damn porn script!” you hissed, trying to wedge yourself deeper into the couch cushions as if you could disappear entirely.

Dick groaned, dragging a hand down his face as he stumbled backwards. “Oh my god.”

Jason made a sound like he was dying. “He means sex, Damian! Dear God, why do I have to be the one to explain this?!”

Damian blinked. “…Then why are they the meal?”

Tim looked like his brain had short-circuited. Again.

Jason threw his hands up. “Nope. Not walking him through this. I’ve done my time.”

Dick, flushed all the way to the tips of his ears, turned to you helplessly. “I swear I thought we were alone.”

You glared at him, mortified. “You described yourself as the entrée,” you snapped. “And me as dessert!”

Damian, still thoroughly lost, narrowed his eyes. “But neither of you are edible. That would be cannibalism.”

Jason grabbed his keys. “I’m going to pretend this never happened and go directly to the manor. If anyone ever speaks of this again—I swear—I’ll shoot them.”

Tim trailed after him, defeated. “I’m going to need a drink. And bleach. And maybe a lobotomy.”

The door slammed behind them, leaving only an awkward silence—and Damian, staring between the two of you with narrowed eyes.

Damian, still staring between you and Dick like you were an unsolvable puzzle, slowly tilted his head. “Is it… normal to talk about being consumed before intercourse?”

You made a strangled noise and grabbed the nearest throw pillow, mashing it to your face.

Dick groaned, dragging a hand down his face as if he could physically wipe away the humiliation. His voice was low and exhausted. “Damian. Leave. Before Jason drives off without you and pretends it was on purpose.”

Damian huffed through his nose, clearly unimpressed. “Tt. As if I would lower myself to ride with him.”

Still, he stood up and brushed the invisible lint from his trousers. He shot you both one last perplexed glance, muttered something in sharp Arabic—definitely a curse this time—and swept toward the door without another word.

The click of the door closing behind him echoed through the now silent apartment.

Dick finally turned to you, face still beet red, hair a mess, shirt half-open and forgotten.

“So…” he began, voice sheepish. “Not the night I had planned.”

You hurled a couch pillow at his head.

He caught it easily, the bastard, flashing that boyish grin that somehow still managed to be charming after all this.

“Still love me?”

You pointed at the door. “Ask me after they recover.”

He winked, his voice dipping back into that sultry purr. “Bet I can make you forget about it.”

You paused.

“…Shut up and lock the door.”

That grin of his widened as he rushed to do as you said.

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cruzerforce4256 · 1 month ago

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BatFam x Batsis Reader.

SYPNOSIS: Batsis is us.

The Whole Family Sitting Together To Discuss About Damian's Problem Of Chocking Criminals.

Dick: "It's against our moral to restrict their airflow... You're not going to listen huh."

Dick: "Reader, tell him why we don't chock people"

*Reader Standing Dramatically Near The Window Looking Out Into The Forest.*

Reader: "I once was just like you Dami... Chocking people out like it was a side hobbie"

Reader: "But... Damian, I realised that..."

*long pause.*

Reader: "That some people liked being choked"

Reader: "I learn it the hard way, he told me to chock him harder and ever since that day I haven't even have the gut to stare at anyone's neck for even a minute."

Dick: "You're just traumatizing him!"

*Damian haven't tried to chock out any person from that day... due to disgust.*

*Dick checking out the new upgrade Bruce made for the batmobile.*

Dick: "I don't see much change... It's just the belt is made from better leather and alot wider... Why is that?"

Bruce: "I've noticed that Reader like to rest their head on the belt and sleep, I assume it must be uncomfortable for her to sleep on so I've improved it."

Dick: "You couldn't add more seat but can improve the belt so that it would be more comfortable?. Your favouritism is showing clear as day, B!"

Bruce: "Priority."

*Superman Decided(Begged) to babysit you and now you're stuck with Luthor for some reason.*

Luthor: "What is so funny?"

*Reader on the ground laughing so hard that they are literally crying.*

Reader: "You got... the second sun on your head!"

Reader: "Ha! Is your ultimate power your baldness?!"

Luthor: "That isn't funny kid"

Reader: "How could you ever ambush anyone? Your shiny head is a dead giveaway!"

Reader: "I can see my reflection on your head!"

*Luthor always wear a hyper realistic wig near you to protect his ego.*

*Reader Got kidnapped by deathstroke.*

Reader: "Too scared to show your true face? How ugly are you?"

Deathstroke: "Im not here to entertain you, but I supposed I rather have you see my face before you die."

*Deathstroke taking off his mask.*

Reader: "HOLY SHIT... you're atrocious! Put that shit back... You should put trigger warning next time my PTSD almost activated!".

*Reader trying to show Tim how the mission should be done."

Reader: "See ain't that hard... Just following the plan invade, destroy, put away for the popo and explode"

*Tim reading the plan.*

Tim: "There is no explosion here... it's leave. The last step is leave."

Reader: "Oh, im dyslexic-"

*The villain hideout exploding on the background."

Tim: "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!"

Reader: "Can't a girl be dyslexic in peace?"

*Jason introducing Reader to his (gang) members.*

Jason: "This is my rat, sell drugs to her and I'll have your hands for decoration"

Reader: "Isn't that abit too much?"

Jason: "If you dare ask for drugs I will personally hang you from that celling."

Reader: "... Okay"

*Few days later. Reader being hang from the very celling.*

Reader: "I only did it to see if you actually would! I would never do drugs and you know that! Please take me down from here! I think there's cockroaches up here!"

Jason: "Well, you're going to be part of the celling unless you rethink about your life decisions!"

Roy: "How can a mere human hang another human that high up?"

Jason: "Raw Disappointment".

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cruzerforce4256 · 1 month ago

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"THE WAYNE SIBLINGS READ THIRST TWEETS"

requested by anon

summary: the internet is horny for you, your brothers suffer for it.

pairings: platonic! dick grayson, jason todd, tim drake x batsis! reader

A/N: 18+, on account of horny twitter users ;)

You and your brothers are lined up in a semi-circle, Dick, you, Jason then Tim, each of you sporting different expressions as the cameras begin rolling.

You and Dick are cheerful mirrors of each other, while Jason and Tim look like they'd rather be anywhere but here as the four of you settle into place.

"So today we're going to have you reading thirst tweets, but the twist is, they're all about your sister." The producer says from out of frame. Abruptly, your brother's moods swing violently.

"No!" Dick cheers, the blinding smile plastered across his face never even twitching.

Jason's frown has evolved from "mildly disgruntled" to "about to start shooting people."

Tim, meanwhile, appears to have stopped working altogether. "Timmers?" You giggle, waving a hand across his face.

"Ew... I mean, people find you attractive?" He scrunches up his nose, and your face turns murderous.

"RIGHT! Listen here you little - " you lean across Jason to strangle your little brother when a giggle from somewhere on set reminds you where you are, and you paste on a practised grin.

"I can see why Damian wasn't invited now."

"None of us should have been invited, this shouldn't be happening." Tim mumbled with a thousand yard stare.

Relishing in his stress, you quickly pull a piece of paper from the oversized thirst jug, staring directly at Tim as you read. "Bruce Wayne's daughter could smack me across the face with a brick and I’d say ‘thank you, mommy’"

Tim dry heaves, face a little green.

"Damn, now I can never use that in bed again." Jason grumbles, causing Dick to spit out his water as Tim gags once more.

"You're disgusting." He kicks Jason as you hum in consideration.

"I don't know, I think I could get behind it."

"Never speak again, actually." Tim fires back.

"Well, if you liked that, then you'll love this one: Sit on my face, I'll pay you, anything! please, SIT ON MY FACE! SIT ON MY-” Dick, who's only just recovered from his previous near death experience starts choking again, making you hit his back a little harder than strictly necessary.

Jason starts attempting to take the jug off your hands, but you quickly dance out of the way, "Oh look, this one's not even that bad." Your brothers look sceptical, but they don't stop you, "She's so fine, I'd kill a man just to breathe the same air as her."

"What is with people and committing crimes?" Jason seems genuinely concerned. How chronically offline of him.

"I attract a very passionate demographic." You shrug.

"You attract future convicts," Dick mutters in devastation.

A shit eating grin covers your face as you read the next one, having lulled them into a false sense of security.

"Need her to pull on my hair like a leash as she fucks me into next week with the strap." Dick wails, falling sideways off the chair like a fainting Victorian woman.

"Hmm, you want the pink or the green one, baby?" you smile seductively at the camera.

"That's it! You're done, you're done!" Jason lunges for you at the same time as Dick, your older brother getting the jug whilst you're hauled over Jason's shoulder.

You shriek, but you refused to be deterred, unfolding one of the papers you'd managed to grab before Dick attempted to thwart your fun. "Not to be dramatic, but if Jason’s sister looked me in the eye and said ‘kneel’, I’d hit the floor so fast I’d break my - hey."

Tim pulls the paper from your hands, staring at it like it killed his puppy. "Why are you encouraging this?" Tim gestures accusingly at the Buzzfeed staff members laughing behind the cameras, before he does a double take at the twitter handle.

"Wait... This is from Roy's Twitter account!" Tim yells, whirling on Jason like he's personally responsible for all of his grievances.

"There's one here from Conner too," You clear your throat, holding the paper far above Tim's head with your superior height courtesy of Jason's unwilling help, "I’d treat you right. You ever want someone to make you cum till you forget your own name, hit me up babe."

Your brothers scream, and you’re having so much fun that you only mildly worry about Conner’s safety in the near future.

(You wonder if you’ll have time to take him up on his offer before his inevitable funeral.)

The video ends with a message flashing across the screen: "Several of the tweets submitted came from Wally West's Twitter account. Some were deemed too explicit to share."

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cruzerforce4256 · 1 month ago

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Bruce, actually being genuine and concerned: why are you still single

Jason, offended: i know you did not just say that

Jason: you? of all people?

Jason: being gotham’s most eligible bachelor for 30 years straight isn’t a compliment

Jason: the public only votes for you ‘cause they have daddy issues and they like silver foxes

Jason: but youre not even a silver fox anymore, youre an arctic fox

Jason: no ones’s lining up for your wrinkly ass

Jason: god forbid they find out youre a furry too like damn

Bruce:

Talia al Ghul, watching them from the window, covered in blood after taking over the LOA so that she, Bruce, and Damian can ride off to the sunset together:

Selina Kyle, next to her, holding Grace Kelly's $38.8 million Cartier ring as an engagement ring to Bruce:

Harvey Dent, in therapy for Bruce:

Superman, rearranging the stars to make a Batman/Bruce constellation:

Wonder Woman, picking out wedding dresses (for Bruce):

Hal Jordan:

Hal Jordan: what

Hal Jordan: im not in love with mr dark and brooding

Hal Jordan:

Hal Jordan, screeching at the other Green Lanterns to stay away from Gotham because Bruce didnt want anyone messing with it:

Ra’s and Joker, dead, still pining, but mostly dead:

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cruzerforce4256 · 2 months ago

Text

*50 year old Dick Grayson time travels to the past*

Jason, looks him up and down: gol-LY what happened to you

Dick: *rolls his eyes*

Future Dick, absolutely delighted: oh my god little LITTLE wing

Tim, fiddling with Future Dick’s equipment, stars in his eyes: this is genius! why haven’t we thought of this before i need to-

Damian: richard. you have not aged well.

Jason, throwing his head back, wheezing: im pissing myself. holy shit im gonna piss myself

Dick: *rolls his eyes harder*

Cass, signing: ‘don’t listen to them, you look good’

Future Dick, hugging her: this is why you’re my favorite

Cass: 😇

Cass, discreetly signing behind her back: ‘he is going bald’

Jason, on the floor, clutching his stomach, crying: im dying. death by laughter. here laughs jason todd-wayne

Dick: that’s. it.

Dick, inhaling:

Dick, screeching: DAAAAD!!!

*heavy footsteps*

*a crash*

*vase breaks*

*alfred shouts*

Bruce, running in the room, panicked: what happened?

Dick, huffing: they’re bullyi-!

Future Dick, quietly: …dad?

Bruce, blinking: dick?

Future Dick, tearing up: dad!

Bruce, utterly baffled: dick???

Future Dick crashes into Bruce, desperately clinging to him. Dick’s heart sinks to the pit of his stomach.

Damian, fearfully, instantly understanding what the reaction meant: richard, get up. stop bothering baba.

Future Dick, clinging harder: dad…tati…

Jason, all amusement gone: stop playing around, dickhead.

Tim, teary-eyed: it’s not true…

Cass, shaking her head: no. no!

Bruce, slowly realizing what was happening, hugs Future Dick back: oh, sweetheart

Future Dick, sniffling: …dn’t you…

Bruce, rubbing his back while smiling reassuringly at his mourning children: im sorry baby, what was that?

Future Dick, lifting his head, sobbing: WHY DIDN’T YOU LET ME BUY MY OWN CIRCUS?!?!

Bruce:

Dick:

Jason:

Tim:

Cass:

Damian:

Future Dick, wailing, shaking Bruce: you’re rich! i’m rich! timmy’s richer! do you just nOT LOVE ME

Jason, hiccuping: im going to kill him

Damian, wiping his tears: i shall do it first.

Cass, eyes red: bald-head deserves death

Dick, about to commit suicide:

Tim, under Bruce’s arms, kicking a weeping Future Dick away:

Bruce, so done: death is my mercy

Batkids, as one: NO!

2K notes · View notes

cruzerforce4256 · 2 months ago

Text

HAHAHAHAHHA

i hand batman a baby. batman takes the baby. bruce wayne adopts the baby. the baby is introduced to the family. the family is not impressed.

Bruce, cooing over his new baby: aw, good evening honey, did you have a nice nap? of course you did, daddy was here the whole time! *proceeds to kiss the baby’s cheek multiple times*

Damian, beside them: *actively bleeding*

Tim: do you feel it now

Tim: do you feel your significance slowly dwindling

Tim: you are a middle child now damian

Tim: do you understand your fate. a middle child, damian. a middle child.

Damian:

Damian, unsheathing his sword: not for long

Before the baby’s Arrival…

Jason, admiring a motorcycle:

Bruce: *buys five*

Jason, glances at a shirt:

Bruce: *buys every color*

Jason: *stomach growls*

Bruce: *books the most expensive restaurant*

After the baby’s Arrival…

Jason: b

Bruce, attentively listening to the baby’s babbling, not even turning his head: hm?

Jason: can i buy this

Bruce, imitating airplanes to feed the baby: sure *tosses card*

Jason:

Jason: im hungry

Bruce, playing peek-a-boo: alfred. kitchen.

Jason:

Jason: *pretends to faint*

Bruce, moves baby away to safey, not sparing him a glance: yes sweetie that’s your brother jay. can you say it? say j-a-y

Baby, giggling, slapping jason’s face: da!

Bruce, gushing in excitement, picking the baby up: da?! did you say dad?! im right here baby! dad’s here!!

Jason:

Jason, still laying on the floor:

Jason, curling up:

Tim, walking by: middle child…the curse of the middle child…

Baby:

Dick: BABY :DD!!

Baby, with Bruce:

Dick: baby :D!

Baby, with Bruce, whose time and attention is now solely dedicated to the baby:

Dick: baby :)

Baby, with Bruce, whose time and attention is now solely dedicated to the baby, which means he no longer pays attention to his first child:

Dick: baby :(

Baby, with Bruce, whose time and attention is now solely dedicated to the baby, which means he no longer pays attention to his first child who just wants to spend time with his dad again because he misses him so much:

Dick: BABY >:[

Cass:

Baby:

Cass:

Baby:

Baby: *cries*

Cass: *narrows eyes*

Baby: *cries louder*

Cass: *hears bruce’s footsteps*

Cass, eyes narrowing again: smart baby

Baby: *stops crying* *smiles* *starts crying again*

Cass: you think dad will pick you?