crows-sleepy - Tumblr blog

[crows-sleepy]

We love that 😭

Mama’s boy Fyodor but make it a Book of Bill reference 🥰

[crows-sleepy]

See how polite they are? Very mindful, very cutesy, very demure.

9 year old Dick: If you’re a friendless loser and you know it, clap your hands!

Bruce:

Dick: Clap. Your. Hands.

Bruce: *clap clap*

———

12 year old Jason: HEY YOU!

Jason: HEEEEEY YOU!

Jason: HEY! YOU!

Bruce: It’s not polite to not call people by their names, Robin.

Jason: Nice try, Hey You. I know my mentor’s name.

———

13 year old Tim: You see this coffee, Bruce?

Bruce: Thank you for making this for m-

Tim: This is my coffee. You are having water. Only people who don’t break mugger’s fingers get coffee.

———

Clark: Batman, your Robins are so polite. They must have been a joy to raise.

Bruce, through clenched teeth: Such a joy.

[crows-sleepy]

YES

Drops of Starlight

[crows-sleepy]

Me Everytime I read my daily angsty fics

[crows-sleepy]

Transfem Dami au, expect a fic to match lol

[crows-sleepy]

A fluffy + angst one shot of Tim and Damian, no trigger warnings, hope you enjoy!

"Geraniums"

Tim could think for hours, but he would never come up with an answer to why Damian suddenly tried getting along with him.

He supposed only Damian knew the answer to that.

But still, even if it was odd, Tim figured the kid had decided that he didn't want to fight anymore, so neither did Tim.

So there they sat, at a family outing in a park, Tim sat with his legs criss crossed in the grass as he watched Dick and Jason play fight, tumbling around in the grass, which was gold entertainment if you started bets on who would win (It was always Dick, but nevertheless).

The girls stayed out of the grass, Steph talking Cass's ear off as they swung together, Cass never minded, just smiling and nodding, adding in her own whispery words every now and again.

Duke watched the fight, but glanced between siblings every few minutes, seemingly checking on them, Tim thinks he was a great addition to the family.

And over on a bench, together sat Bruce and Alfred, making small talk as they watched over everyone, most likely making sure they didn't burn the park down.

Damian however, sat in the grass at Tim's side, something the teen took pride in.

Take that Dick.

He had thought to himself, he didn't really have anything against Dick, though the man had been the reason Tim hadn't got coffee today, so if Tim was stealing the youngest one's attention away from Dick, well who's to really say.

But suddenly Damian stands, Tim glances up at the now standing child, but Damian just pads off.

No one else seems to pay attention to the action, but Tim does, he can't help from wondering where Damian's going, watching him walk away, though he doesn't follow after the younger one.

Tim thinks for a second, Damian was probably going off to play somewhere else. Then he remembered it was Damian.

He ponders for a few minutes on where Damian had left to, stuck in his own curiosity.

But then he returned, Tim peered at him questioningly, and Damian held something out to Tim.

It was a Geranium.

Tim waited, but Damian didn't just push it into his hands like always, Damian waited for Tim to take it put of his hands himself.

So Tim does, holding it up to the sun, watching the way the maroon petals shine in the light.

"Huh..thanks kid."

Damian smiles at Tim's words, nodding pleasantly.

Damian seemed happier that Tim accepted the present, it was a relief that Damian was still in such a good mood.

Tim smiles back, ruffling the younger's hair.

Damian doesn't pull away or shout like he normally would. Opting to stay, even seeming glad.

It confused Tim, but it was a nice confusion, so he stayed silent, letting the comfortable atmosphere wash over them.

The day moves fast, everyone having fun, but when they make it home, Tim realizes he forgot the flower at the park.

Though he supposes it is just a flower after all.

But when they get home Damian's mood sours.

A frown set on his small face. He brushes past Jason quietly.

"Hey, Dami-"

Tim had begun calling out, only cut off by a door clicking shut, Damian's bedroom door, as he ignored Tim...

Tim didn't know why Damian was so upset now.

Jason let's out a whistle.

"Damn, what did you do to piss off your number one fan?"

Jason was amused, joking, but it wasn't amusing to Tim.

They had just started to fix their relationship, why did this have to happen. Maybe Damian just changed his mind.

But as the day finishes and the week continues, Damian doesn't cheer up, only becoming his irritable past self.

And Tim decides he's seen enough.

★

Damian was upset, everyone had to know, he was aware of just how terribly he was hiding it.

Drake didn't want to be his brother and that was fine, he just had to let the older leave.

He wouldn't stop him if Drake didn't want him to.

"Damian, we need to talk."

Damian had to admit he was surprised when one day Drake walked up to him, in the living room.

"Yes, Drake?"

Damian prompted, his tone professional, he thought it would be better, thought Drake would enjoy this tone more, but it only seemed to upset him.

"I want to know what's wrong, why are you being a brat again?"

Drake probably shouldn't have worded it that way, and Drake probably knows it too, and just doesn't care, doesn't care about you, stop trying.

Damian pushed all of his thoughts away.

"You disposed of your Geranium."

Damian had informed, as if Drake didn't already know that.

Damian clenched his hands at Drake's next words, his knuckled turning white.

"That's what all of this is about? Damian it's just a flower."

To hear that stung more than Damian thought it would.

"It is not. It is a Geranium, those symbolize siblings, I gave it to you for that reason, I had assumed you left it for that reason. I know I'm not the ideal choice of brother, you don't have to pretend."

After Damian explained Tim fell silent, and Damian just stood, waiting in the quiet, like he had done hundreds of times before.

Although, Damian was confused, Tim had been silent for awhile now, looking almost distraught, it was an uncomfortable look to see on his elder brother.

"I did not know that. Damian, of course you're my little brother. I thought you knew you always were."

Tim spoke through a borderline sorrowful sigh. And Damian couldn't believe his ears.

"And don't talk about yourself like that."

Tim reminds, adding on to his sentence.

Damian can't stand the feeling of embarrassment that washes over him as he listens to Tim.

Was Damian really that ignorant? Not realizing that Tim hadn't even known what it meant to him.

Of course Tim wouldn't know, Damian never told him, not even once.

His face is dusted red, he knows it, but at this point, he isn't sure how much he cares.

He crashes into his older brother with a tight hug, rivaling one of Dick's.

"This never happened, by the way."

Damian murmurs into the fabric of Tim's shirt, a warm smile creeps onto Tim's expression.

"Sure thing, squirt."

---------------------------------

Word count: 1060

[crows-sleepy]

Demon's twin au, except....

A Demon's twin au where Danny and Damian are polar opposites of each other as usual. Damian is the serious and pokey one while Danny is the laid back, carefree twin. Except, Danny is 10x more psychotic than Dami, and his demeanor is somewhat a manipulation tactic. He's still loves Dami vv much and would gladly burn the world for him while Dami is....hm. He envies Danny but in the same time very intimidated by him (read: black cat & golden retriever situation)

One day he gets killed by Damian (may it be a duel that he didn't think seriously because he thought Dami would never kill him or Dami just flat out conspiring against him is your choice) and Danny was FURIOUS at him. Instead, he swore Damian would pay the price for betraying him.

Fast forward after he got resurrected and lived as Danny, he's soften up a bit; more talking and less stabbing, basically. One thing leads to another where he leaves and ends up in Gotham (preferably because of CW) and hey, what dya know. Dami's siblings aren't that bad...

Meanwhile Batfam™ are scrambling because there's a teenager that looks like Damian wandering over Gotham. Damian is perplexed because that could be his supposedly dead brother (eye color).

Everything went wrong when Danny straight up jumped at Damian in costume, trying to kill him.

[crows-sleepy]

(prev anon this is the last one i promise)

instead of the whole revenge-dramatic-reveal-kill-the-joker plan jason just breaks into arkam, kills the joker real fast, but somehow breaks an arm/leg/ribs/some other bone in doing so. and hes in a lot of pain, and hasn't slpet in a while and when he wakes up hes back in the manor, and bruce and dick are staring at him. bruce asks him what he's doing here and jason's pain riddled, sleep deprived brain somehow comes up with "what are you talking about? ive lived here for years?" and somehow, somehow that works. and somehow he manages to gaslight the batfam into thinking he never actually died because he doesnt want to admit that that was the best response he could come up with (and he really fucking missed them okay and no shut up, its just the first reason. really.)

(he somehow manages to get tim and dami in on it too)

this could be a good setup for misunderstandings!

The batfam all come to the conclusion that an alternate universe’s Jason must have accidentally traveled to their world.

None of them are in a hurry to make him go back. On the contrary, they all collectively try to adjust their world around “Jason’s true reality”.

Meaning if Jason told them about that time he got a C- in Literature once (he always had A’s) the others would just nod along, saying they “remember”.

They really don’t want to lose Jason again.

[crows-sleepy]

Not all of these may be for you but there are some rlly good ones in here!

exactly one person asked and i’ve been DYING to make this, so here are all of my favorite long batman fanfics in general and for new readers @twisted-tales-told :)

cards on the table by @wesslan ! 69k, completed. this is one of my all time favorite fanfictions, it’s so funny and tim is a mastermind genius and a little liar <3 he basically pretends to be a fortune teller and gives scarily good predictions and advice by stalking the upper class and eventually gets involved with the batfam and has to maintain his lies while dealing with his issues :) 10/10, very found family, good angst, so much lying

Dark Matter by @mysterycyclone , 221k, ongoing. this is a batman fanfic rec, of course my bbg dark matter is going to be here <3 this is a MCUxDCU crossover where after infinity war (spoilers for that if you haven’t seen it!) peter parker gets sent to the DCU dimension with part of the soul stone and basically is haunted by the ghosts of the avengers while trying to survive in gotham and get back to his dimension. this is so well written i’ve read it at least three times, it’s still ongoing but trust me it is SO GOOD. i can’t properly describe it, but if you like spider-man and you are interested in batman, you’ll love.

Red is the Color of Sinners by @bluelotuswrites , series, 120k, ongoing, M. i want you to look me in my eyes when i tell you this is my favorite series on ao3. it is set after under the red hood and daredevil 3 where jason and matt meet in a church after jason loses his ability to speak following the events of UTRH. they keep running into each other both as matt and daredevil and eventually jason begins helping matt out with injuries and tech. it’s not finished yet, but there is something so compelling about their dynamic in this series as well as jason’s overall character and how he is portrayed. i’m a sucker for mute jason after UTRH and this series does so well giving him a fresh start and a place away from gotham to heal and build relationships. i cannot recommend enough.

buy back the secrets by @vinelark , 71k, ongoing, T. THIS!!! oh my god, so this is a timkon fic where kon still doesn’t know tim’s civilian identity, but whenever he’s in trouble tim calls for superboy which leads to them meeting without kon knowing. shenanigans ensure when kon starts spending more time with tim! it’s still ongoing but the author is currently working on the next part and it is so so worth the wait. chapter 4 ends on a cliffhanger though so be warned :))

Sales People Know (listening is the most important part) by Mayhem10, 77k, completed, T. this has the coolest urban magical realism ever. tim basically runs this magic shop that shows up places and people who need something find it in his shop :) it’s kinda a slow burn found family fic with magic themes and a smidge of angst!

Retrograde Motion by Lysical, 112k, completed, T. this is best de-aged kid fic ever. jason gets turned into a 7 year old and basically the outlaws, artemis and biz, join forces with the batfam to take care of him. but trust me when i say this is worth your time, it might sound tropey but in the best way possible!! and jason’s relationship with artemis is sooo important to me in this!

Hand in Unloveable Hand (a chokehold) by britishparty, 54k, completed, M. this is one of the best psychological torture/grooming fics i’ve ever read. pretty much what if while our taking photos of batman and robin, little tim gets kidnapped and black mask gets his hands on him and decides he’s the perfect size for a protege. years of psychological abuse and insane mind games ensue. also tim is a Badass™️

If He Had Come by bronwe_iris, 45k, completed, T. so i’m a little freak and i love the angst of arkham knight jason, but more specifically the aus where bruce saves jason before he becomes the arkham knight! this is an au where bruce finds jason and saves him from the joker after 9 months of torture and brings him home. focuses on his healing mentally and physically and rebuilding his relationship with his family

Banshee in a Well by liverobinreaction (bugbee), 43k, completed, T. veeeery good angst. basically what if tim couldn’t die? 43k of tim drake whump where he just dies a bajillion times and eventually his family notices <3

The Birds: Hatching a Family by Oceanera12, 81k, completed, T. this is like “what if the batkids weren’t adopted by bruce, but instead they were all foster siblings who can’t seem to stay out of gotham at night and batman happens to find them and decides obviously he can’t leave these kids to their own business, he has to stick his nose in it” and there’s some angst and heaps of found family

The Hellblazer’s Apprentice by @bluelotuswrites, 29k, ongoing, M. what can i say, im a simple woman, i love to see jason with literally any older male mentor :) basically in UTRH what if he took up an apprenticeship under constantine to learn magic to piss off batman! so good, i really love constantine so seeing him and jason interact in a long fic is so good. also ALL BLADES JASON TODD SAVE ME… ALL BLADES JASON TODD-

something in the static by bonerot19, 101k, ongoing series with three main completed works, T. this is a jason centric series where jason still lives in crime alley with his mom and dad and never stole the batmobile tires. it follows his life in crime alley with an addict mom and an abusive dad and one night when his dad is whaling on him nightwing finds him and the bats just can’t seem to leave him alone after that. steph is his neighbor and best friend also and their relationship is so good. this is a “what if jason took a different way home to the wayne’s” fic series and i love it so much <3

catch the asteroids that come your way by ThePackWantsTheD, 54k, completed, T. i don’t read a lot of ships in the batman fandom i’m sorry, but this kyle/jason one is sooo lovely. basically the two of them growing up together and falling in love and then dealing with the aftermath of A Death in the Family and finding each other again :) really sweet and nice!

hope you find something you like! i realized the majority of these are tim or jason centric, and i love them all dearly, but if anyone has any recs for long fics focusing on any of the other batkids lmk! and any other recs in general, i am a fiend for new fics

[crows-sleepy]

Look at this... 👀

Look at this... 👀 https://pin.it/5YSOpbWRA

POV- Some little assassin is trying to lower your guard but its summer.

A drawing of mine with the base from the link, I would like to make it apparent that this is not my idea, and the only part that belongs to me is the added design.

[crows-sleepy]

Chapter three of, "Robin's are meant to fly, how did you lose your wings?"

This one will have a content warning for slight depictions of self harm, if you are sensitive to this do not read the last paragraph or the chapter, stay safe!!

•

The sound of cutlery against porcelain screeches in Damian's ears as dinner goes on, and on.

He hates it, hates the sound, hates the room, hates the people in the room, hates that he loves them, hates that he knows normal families wouldn't find family dinners strange.

But he does, he did, for so long, but how long until they are just a distant memory?

How long until he no longer has these?

These beautiful fond memories, these wonderful, lovable family members, how long exactly until he, Damian himself, is a long lost memory?

Long since living? Long since a part of this family?

He wasn't completely sure when his head had tilted to the side slightly, barely noticeable to anyone else.

Anyone except everyone in this house.

He didn't know when he leaned closer to Grayson, he didn't like that at all, didn't know when his fork paused over his meal.

How had he missed all of this?

Missed the way Grayson snuck worried glances to him, missed the way everyone stared down at him, like he was some kind of exhibit, like he was some kind of product.

But then again, that's what he always was wasn't he?

Why had he ever thought he would be anything more...

Even to any of them .

They were wonderful, beautiful human beings...how could he be anything more than a weapon, that was it wasn't it?

They kept him around because of what he could do? Because they hated him.

They thought he would be better left watched , like some kind of ticking time bomb.

That is exactly what they thought he was!

He hated them, hated, hated, hated, hated, hated!!!

Oh, how he loved them...

Grayson's worries gaze wouldn't leave him, it was as if the man didn't care that he was caught staring, how could he be so blatant?

Damian could almost roll his eyes at the observation, how dumb was he? Being so obvious, at least try to hide it.

"Hey, you okay kiddo? You haven't been eating.."

Grayson's sentence softened at the end if that was even possible, everyone was already speaking so softly to him nowadays.

"I'm fine, Grayson."

Damian had been quick to assure the man, he could still do that much at least, but that didn't make Grayson look any less upset, maybe even made him look more so than he did before...maybe Damian couldn't successfully assure anyone.

But that was fine, really, he was an assassin after all, he didn't need to assure anyone, he needed to dispose of them, needed to provide pride to his family.

Needed to stop being a failure.

"Are you su-"

Grayson had been cut off before he could finish his question.

"I am positive."

Damian had spoken firmly.

He didn't want to talk about this, didn't want anyone else to know anything was wrong, why couldn't they just leave him alone?

But still, still, Grayson's unwelcome questions continued.

"Damian, you know you can tell us what's wrong, you are allowed to talk to us."

Dick tried to reassure, but it only made Damian feel worse.

Because why, why, couldn't all of them just stop testing him?

Of course he wished it was real! But he knew it wasn't, it was just getting cruel at this point...

Even if he could never admit it, even if he would never be allowed to say it aloud, he loved all of them dearly, why were they so fixated on testing him like this?

Unless it was real.

Unless they actually cared.

Unless they really loved him.

But that couldn't be it, he knew that could never be true, not for someone like him.

"Grayson, I said I was fine, I do not need help, I do not need to speak to any of you, because you can't fix anything!"

Damian regretted snapping immediately as the loud clatter and screech of his fork scraped against the delicate plate, it didn't break thankfully.

It seemed like it might, it felt like it might.

It felt like it might snap in two, right on the table, in front of everyone, as Grayson ever so slightly flinched back at the outburst.

Damian felt like such a disgrace, he couldn't help but be reminded, just how much he hates himself..

Especially in that moment.

He knows he shouldn't care.

He knows that it shouldn't bother him that no one tells him off for it, that they don't grab him by the collar and throw him to the floor, drawing any and all weapons they have on them.

Telling him how terrible he is.

Telling him how he should never have been born, how he didn't have the right to be called human like the rest of them.

How much he hated that he would agree if they ever told him that...

But they didn't, no one even reprimanded him, and he knew he should be, knew he should be yelled at, even Todd didn't say anything!

He wasn't called a brat, why wasn't he berated? Scolded for the defiance, and why, why did Grayson back off when told to?

Why did they all listen to him without question?

His eyes burn with unshed tears, he can only stare down at his full plate as he feels all of their eyes on him.

He just wants them to stop.

Why wouldn't they stop?

Why the hell did it bother him so much?

He knows , he shouldn't be an heir to mother or father, knows that he shouldn't be human, knows he shouldn't be alive, knows he shouldn't have made it past one year old, let alone ten, why did he have to be reminded every day?

He can feel his heart race under his skin, thumping against his bones, desperately trying to escape.

Feels the way the oxygen begs and pleads to leave his lungs to no avail.

Feels the way his thoughts race and run wild as he finally realizes..

He can't breathe.

Slow deep breaths through his nose seem to at least fix the most noticeable problems, but as he glances up, his eyes meet Cain's, almost immediately.

Hers with concern and understanding coiled deep within them, but how could she ever understand?

★

Cass peered at her youngest brother for longer than she had admittedly meant to.

She watched and waited, and observed as his breathing gradually came to a complete halt.

She couldn't help the anxious feeling that enveloped her as she saw that.

She was sure everyone else did too, it wasn't to hard for them to be able to tell when someone was on the verge of a panic attack right in front of them.

She was sure someone would give some kind of signal to help him if it was needed, they wouldn't just leave that alone.

But still, worry crept up her back, clawing at her shoulders as it latched onto her in a surprise attack.

She needs to know what was happening with Damian.

It feels so important, so much bigger than anything she's ever worried about for him.

She is his older sister, it is her job to help him, to know what's wrong, and she should be able to, but she doesn't know.

Doesn't know what's wrong, but she knows that it had to have started one day after patrol.

No one seemed to have picked up on that yet, they all over looked it, she knew they had to step back though.

They were too close, too involved in the issue to ever hope of solving it.

No one could look at it from an outside perspective, but she knew they had to.

She can't help the overwhelming feeling of guilt when even after she tries to look at the bigger picture she can't solve it.

This is her youngest brother, and yet she can't fix it.

She can't be the strong older sister she wants to be.

Cass's eyes drift away from Damian as his gaze quickly fleets away from hers right after making contact.

Did he dislike their concern so much?

She would have to file that away for later...

She doesn't know what to do as she is reminded for what seems like the hundredth time, that she doesn't know what's wrong with her little brother.

★

As dinner comes to an end Damian feels like an absolute fool.

Pushing himself harshly out of his seat he stands eagerly, silently excusing himself as he turns without a word, walking away from the rest of his family.

He yearns for the only part of the day he gets to be relatively alone.

As he tried descending down the hallway he took note of the fact that Thomas had started quickly making his way after Damian, the younger of the two noticed relatively fast.

Not good enough, know he's about to before even he knows, you'll never survive if you can't outsmart these idiots.

That wasn't right...was it? He doesn't think he even remembers anymore..

"Hey Damian!"

Thomas had called after him, as he waved at the younger boy.

Damian glanced back, his steady footfall coming to a complete stop.

"What is it, Thomas?"

Damian's tone was colder than he would have liked, he knew what everyone thought, but he didn't want to come off hateful to everything..not anymore.

"I was just wondering if I could talk to you? I wanted to make sure you knew that you can talk to any of us if you need to, or even just if you want to, we're all here for you anytime you want us. We care about you, and you've been a little..off? Recently, I guess I just wanted to say that you can come to any of us no matter how little you think the problem is."

Thomas had explained, a kind smile gracing his lips, so kind, so warm, it melted Damian's heart slightly, it made Damian want to spill his guts to his older brother.

To everyone.

But he also heard how soft the tone was, how gentle, and that wasn't right.

Damian didn't need him to be gentle, Damian didn't need anyone to be careful with him, he wasn't made of glass, he was strong, he didn't need protection from anything.

"I am not weak Thomas, I am not a child, I do not need your immature assurances, save those for someone who actually wants them, goodnight."

Damian could feel bile burn, and tear at his raw, blood tasting, throat as he saw Thomas looking like a kicked puppy.

The older boy's shoulders slumping slightly as his line of vision drifted away from Damian.

"Right.. Yeah, night, keep it in mind though? I mean just in case.."

Thomas had all but pleaded, Damian hesitated, but nodded, he needed to fix what he said wrong, he didn't even care if he failed these stupid tests anymore.

Thomas smiled again, so, so brightly, nodding, and walking off to his room, as if he was content with just the fact that Damian said he would consider it.

Even though Damian didn't do what he wanted.

So odd.

Damian doesn't need to talk to anyone, he wasn't like Thomas, he wasn't like anyone here, he didn't have the privilege of being weak.

He didn't have the privilege of being human, as much as he wished he had.

When had he gotten so envious?

Damian shouldn't, he shouldn't even feel bad like he had before, he should make them feel bad, and he shouldn't care when he did, but, oh, how badly he felt for it.

Damian's small feet padded against the wood of the floor as he made his way back to his bedroom, the door clicking open and closed as he slipped in.

Locking it as he went over to his closet, creaking the door ajar as he slid his hand into the darkness, easily grabbing onto his Robin uniform.

Distantly he thinks about other children, the foolish thoughts of monsters dwelling in the darkness of the closet or under the bed.

He finds it odd, and even a little silly, but for a brief moment wonders, if maybe there was some truth to it?

He feels envy pooling in his heart again.

Why did other children get to have such innocent fears?

Why couldn't that be him?

Why was this who he had to be?

His mind raced with all kinds of questions, but he pulled the Robin suit close to his chest, clutching onto it tightly as some of it brushed against his lap when he pulled it.

When had he sat?

His gaze drifted to the mirror across the room, he saw a little boy staring back at him in the mirror.

Jet black hair, bright green eyes met his own, the boys stature so small compared to Damian, but as he looked back at himself, outside of the mirror, he was that small wasn't he?

Was he always that small? He thought he had been bigger...older.

He pulled his mind away from his thoughts, he didn't want to think right now, or ever, ever again.

Tugging his civilian clothes off, his eyes drifted to the scars lacing his body, the small ones, the large ones, the faded ones, the puffy ones.

The ones caused by grandfather, the ones caused by mother, any others felt so unimportant.

He pulled on his Robin suit, a long familiar vigilante staring back at him in the mirror, the only thing that felt familiar anymore.

But even with that comfort, his mind drifted back to his scars, he was right...

They do not love him, how could they?

He had been left, and he will again, by everyone, forever, over, and over, again.

He tries so hard to push those thoughts out of his mind, he knows he should not listen to him, knows it's dumb, that he shouldn't believe a word he says, but he can't help it.

He knew he was right anyway...

Damian's nails dug into his forearm until he was sure he left dents in his skin, he just needed a distraction right now, his hand fell from his arm as he entered the Batcave.

Word count: 2369

[crows-sleepy]

Hello!! It has been brought to my attention that you cannot access my batfam fanfiction, "Robins are meant to fly how did you lose your wings?"

So this is the link if you are interested, I know it may be hard to keep up on my tumblr alone, and it doesn't have the extra notes.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/57868474

If this does not work for any reason, and you still want a link, notify me and I will do my best to fix it!

[crows-sleepy]

I don't think I'm the only one bothered by the idea that Robin is just 'Batman's sidekick'. As if the only purpose of the mantle is to follow Batman and stay in his shadow while becoming the emotional support of this guy in a bat costume.

Robin wasn't created to be a legacy, just as it wasn't created for Batman. It was in memory of Dick Grayson's parents, and it was his mantle that he made to fight alongside Batman, not behind him. And later on, Robin also became an independent hero with the Teen Titans, so it really wasn't just a name to put next to the bat. It had it's own presence and influence.

I've just seen lately that when someone thinks of Robin's role, his purpose, they will think of a sidekick with the responsibility to keep Batman on his feet and make sure he doesn't fall into his darkness. And while part of that is true, is not all of it.

Robin was hope, light, magic. Robin was what opposed while also complimented Batman. He compensated the fear the Dark Knight brought. But Robin also spread his wings and casted its light over other cities, other heroes. He brought kid vigilantes together and created a team that helped outside of Gotham, and made a name for himself.

Most important of all, Robin was Dick Grayson. There's no Robin without Dick Grayson and Dick Grayson has always been Robin, even before he chose that would be his hero identity. This is also why I believe Dick Grayson is the best Robin, since he embodies everything that it means to be it. But that's a talk for another day.

All of this, all that Robin is/was, can't be reduced to Batman's sidekick or helper. At least, that's what I think.

[crows-sleepy]

Art for an au I'm making, this will be separate from "Robin's are meant to fly, how did you lose your wings?" But will also have a written out fan fiction.

[crows-sleepy]

Chapter two of "Robins are meant to fly, how did you lose your wings?"

★

Bruce let out a heavy sigh, he didn't know what to do.

He knew that he should know, but he really didn't.

He brought his hands up, running over his face and through his hair, he pushed the chair he was sitting in out from by his desk.

A frustrated huff escaped his lips as he harshly shoved a few of his papers away, floating off the desk and fluttering to the ground.

What was he supposed to do about this? His son, his youngest, only ten, was isolating himself, and getting hurt far to often to be complete accidents.

How could he help that when pushing would only push Damian farther away?

He stood, walking to the door before swinging it open and stepping out, only to be met with an odd sight.

"Damian what in the world are you doing?"

Bruce had wondered to the boy, who was laying flat on his back, in the middle of the upstairs hallway, Alfred the cat curled up on his chest.

"Hello father."

Damian had greeted simply, even if this was unusual for the boy, at least this was a better unusual.

"Is there a reason you are laying on the floor?"

Bruce had asked, crouching down to be closer to Damian's level.

★

He thought for a bit, no, Damian supposes there wasn't much of a reason, well there was one, but not an important one, it was only important to him, so why did father want to know?

"No, I don't suppose I do have a reason."

He had answered, it wasn't exactly a lie. He just wasn't telling the whole truth, the truth to this was, he was experimenting.

What all could he get away with here? Could he lay on the floor and not be purposefully kicked? Would father berate him and tell him to get up?

Bruce huffed, sounding slightly amused, that was an odd reaction..

"Well then, would you like to come have dinner instead? It should be about ready by now."

Father had asked kindly, how strange was that.

Damian felt so utterly baffled.

How didn't Father care? What else was he allowed to do here that he couldn't before- wait. What if this was a test?

This was wrong, wrong, wrong wrong, wrong, so wrong, Damian would be in trouble again, what were Father's punishments like? Would they be worse then Grandfather's?

He could handle it, of course he could, he could handle any of punishment dished out to him, but at the hand of Father?

He would never admit it, he could never ever admit it, but if it was Father, Damian doesn't think he'd know what to do.

But he realizes he's been quiet to long and that Father is now looking vaguely concerned, what was the question again? Oh dinner, right.

He nods.

"That would be acceptable."

Bruce nods back, standing to his full height, Damian glances at Alfred the cat, but stands moving to cradle the feline in his arms instead.

He followed his father down the stairs, walking more carefully this time, he couldn't risk falling, not with the cat in his arms, not in front of Father.

Father was lenient, yes, Damian had figured that much out, but when it came to strength? He must be the same as mother and grandfather mustn't he?

After all he was Batman as well.

Damian's feet reached the large floor of the downstairs hallway, and he knew they were downstairs, even without that, he had the the manor mapped out anyway, there was no need to think, he knew this place like the back of his hand, so he followed silently as Bruce walked into the dining room.

The large room was lacking in people, the dining table set already, Brown in her seat as she talked off Cain's ear, who didn't seem to mind all that much.

They spotted Damian and Father rather quickly, to quickly if you ask him. He didn't want people to be able to tell when he enters a room.

He didn't want to be weak, to be losing his skills, he didn't- oh, Cain was staring directly at him, Brown speaking to Father, glancing at Damian every now and again.

Why was Cain staring at him? Was his weakness that obvious? Maybe she was thinking about how easy it would be to kill him right now, it would be maybe she should..

He pushed those thoughts put of his head, not leaving them for another time, that in itself would be a weakness, he is an assassin, he cannot show any insecurity even to himself.

It took him about 30 seconds to realize Father was speaking to him, he listened.

"Get your brothers for dinner?"

Was the only part of the sentence Damian got, but he nodded, assuming, Father was asking him to get the others for dinner, seeing as they had not shown up yet, he needn't get Gordon, she would show up on her own, the others however seemed to have a talent for being late, so as Bruce nodded back, Damian stepped away.

As he left through the doorway he could feel Cain's gaze bore into the back or his head, he refused to look back as he left.

His shoed feet tapped along the wood as he walked, silence enveloping him, only the creaking of the floorboards filling the empty sound.

He hated when it was this quiet, he always had, but he turned a corner back to the living room where he had seen the others before.

As h stepped in and all three pairs of eyes flashed towards him immediately, and oh, if he didn't hate that so.

"Father would like you all to make your way to the dining room now."

Damian had announced to all three in the room, but that was it, there were only three.

"Is anyone aware of where Thomas is?"

He wondered to the group, all staring at him, why wouldn't they stop?

Grayson smiles, but it's not his usual smile, it's sad, and mourning.

"Yeah, he's out right now, should be back soon."

He assured Damian, standing from the couch, Drake stood as well, almost instantly once he saw that Grayson had.

Todd rolled his eyes much like Damian wanted to do at the moment, everyone was acting so odd, he thinks maybe it would've just been better if they stayed how they were.

"Well, how about we all go to the dining room like you said? Right, Jason."

Drake spoke agreeably, casting a demanding glance over to Todd, who scoffed but stood, what was happening right now?

Damian let out an annoyed huff.

"You all are weirdos and complete idiots."

Damian reprimanded but turned on his heel walking out of the room, he didn't like this, he had just gotten used to how everyone acted why did they have to change?

Why couldn't they just stay the way you was used to, as much as he hated it.

Why couldn't Grayson greet him with a smile that would rival the sun?

Why couldn't Drake argue with him on every little thing?

Why couldn't Todd insult him and try to fight like always, what was going on?

Things were changing so fast how could he ever plan to keep up?

They followed him out silently, the air was tense and filled with worry, he couldn't think about that right now, he didn't want to.

Didn't want to think about the way that no one tried to insult him back after he did to them.

Didn't want to think about the obvious concern in all of their gazes.

Didn't want to think about how eerily quiet it was right now.

★

Tim's heart thudded against his ribcage, so loud he thought that everyone else could hear it, it thrummed loudly in his ears.

What if he messed up? What if he upset the kid? He didn't want to, he loved arguing with him sure, and they didn't have the best of relationships, no he knew that hadn't.

But that was still his little brother.

He was still scared, scared of what was happening with Damian, scared of hurting the now so fragile seeming boy.

He couldn't think like that though, at the very least he couldn't express those thoughts, Damian would hate him for them in a normal day, god knows he'd hate knowing Tim's right about it.

Damian was silent as he walked ahead of them, Tim wasn't dumb, he knew Damian wasn't all that happy or calm right now, the kid looked like he was seconds away from screaming or just running off.

Tim hoped Damian wouldn't do either, but at least if he was yelling at them they would have a chance of knowing something regarding what was going on with him.

Dick thinks Damian is being bullied at school, wrong.

Jason thinks that Damian is just being dramatic about something, also wrong.

Tim had decided (with a little help from Cass) that neither of those were the correct answer, this didn't feel like something as simple as a school bully, this didn't feel like random drama.

This felt big, and this felt scary.

Tim was never scared of anything for himself, but Damian?

What would he do if Damian was in serious trouble? What could he, what could any of them do if the kid wouldn't tell them anything?

Walking into the dining room, they came to a halt, Tim almost slamming into Jason's back.

"Hey, watch it replacement."

The older of the two had ordered, but Tim could tell there was no real heat to his tone.

Tim watched as Damian took his seat quietly.

So, so quietly..

Tim took his across from Damian, and next to Jason, Dick as always sat directly next to Damian, but with a more cautious air to him this time, almost calculating.

The table was set with food ready, the two oldest in the entire house sat at either end of the table.

And with that, Tim readied himself for what may be the awkwardest dinner at the manor yet.

★

Word count: 1687

[crows-sleepy]

The batfam trauma candy salad would go absolutely insane.

Dick: Hi. I'm Dick Grayson and when I was 8 I watched my parents fall to their death in front of me, then I had to move away from everything I love and spend the rest of my life in some weird American city. And I brought the sour gummy worms.

Jason: This is so stupid- my mother used to kick me out when he drug dealer would come over so I didn't see her spending our very small amount of money on drugs.

Steph *off screen*: what did you bring?

Jason: nerds.

Cass: I was raised to be a weapon, a murderer. I brought peach rings.

Steph: I'm Steph and My dad was an alcoholic who thought he could go head to head with batman and outdo the riddler. And I brought Reese's pieces.

Tim: I'm Timothy Drake Wayne and I had left the house to try and find some guy before he killed my dad, just for him to kill my dad when I was gone. I brought sour rainbow strips.

Duke: My parents are in a mental ward, high on joker toxin. No one knows if they'll ever get better. And I got m&m's.

Damian: I am a highly trained assassin and-

Steph: cut. Cut. Damian. Civilian identities. Ok. Restart.

Damian: My mother randomly dropped me on some weird man's doorstep when I was ten. I brought rock candy.

[crows-sleepy]

Summary: A tear rolled down his cheek, falling and landing to the floor under him, he didn't cry loudly like most children his age do, it was silent, better that way.

But it wasn't best that way, he shouldn't be crying at all, he was not a child, he was an heir, he could not, even for a second risk falling that far.

Or, Damian's past ia always there no matter how badly anyone wishes it wasn't

Or or, Damian angst in which league standards make sure no one can ever know he's not alright, but they do

Title: Robin's are meant to fly, how did you lose your wings?

Chapter one, also on ao3 under the same name, will be updated regularly

★

Tap, tap, tap

Click, click, click

Tick, tick, tick

In the living room of the manor, Tim's foot tapped repeatedly against the floor as his leg quickly bounced with anxiety, the only other noises being the ticking of the ever turning clock, and the clicking of Jason unloading and reloading his guns, looking like he was about a second away from punching whatever was closest to him.

So on the couch sat Tim, a long empty cup of coffee in hand, next to him sat Dick, so eerily silent, he had never been this quiet, the oldest's pale blue gaze bore into the smooth wood of the floor, his hands clasped so tightly together his knuckles were white, as he sat deep in thought, and Jason in a plush arm chair across from the two, a couple guns on hand.

'2:00 pm'

The clock had read, two, only an hour and a half until Damian came home from school.

Jason let out an aggressive huff of irritation, slamming his gun down on the table.

"What the hell is up with the demon brat?"

Jason's loud, angry tone rang out to his brother's.

Tim sighed heavily, exhaustion and even concern seeping from his body language, he placed his empty cup down on the coffee table in front of him.

"If we knew that, this wouldn't be happening would it?"

Tim had snipped back.

"Both of you stop it, this isn't getting us anywhere.."

Dick spoke through a sigh, unclasping his hands to run one through his hair.

"Well I don't suppose you have any better ideas, Dickie bird?"

Jason had asked, his tone sarcastic as ever, irritation clear in his voice, something was wrong with Damian, something was really wrong, and they wanted, no needed, to find out what it was.

Dick had paused to think, that seemed to be the only thing he knew to do about this, he needed to think this over, think Dick, think, you want to ask him but he just shuts off, you can't scare the kid...

But then he spoke.

"We can't talk to him about it, we all know he isn't going to say anything if we just come right out and ask, we need to think this through."

Think this through? Is that all you know how to do? What a crappy older brother, can't even figure out what's wrong with Damian.

"Dick's right, plain out asking him isn't working, we need to be more careful about this, or he'll start trying harder to pretend like nothing's wrong."

Tim had agreed, his tone thoughtful.

"Let's go over everything, what have you two noticed about Damian recently?"

Dick offered, they needed to get everything together, if they went without knowing everything Damian would surely tear them down just as fast as they had gotten up.

Jason scoffs, rolling his eyes.

"That he's a damn brat."

"Jason."

Dick gritted the name out scoldingly.

"We have to take this seriously."

Dick spoke with exasperation and worry sinking through his voice, and Jason must have heard it to, given how quickly he caved.

"Kid's been getting hurt more on patrol, it's not like him, letting himself get all scraped up over nothing."

Jason spoke as he gave in, Tim nodded as Jason spoke, before his own voice rang into the air.

"I noticed that too, but that's not where it started, Damian seems distracted, upset even, something's wrong."

Dick didn't necessarily feel any better at his little brother's words, guilt and concern flooded his gut swarming and swallowing him alive. How hadn't he noticed this sooner? Why hadn't he been there to stop it before whatever Damian is upset about happened? Why did he have to be such a bad brother...

But he couldn't focus on those feelings right now, he needed to focus on Damian, he needed to focus on helping him before anything, and compiling this information just might help.

"Has he said anything that could show what he was upset about?"

Dick had wondered worriedly to his younger brothers. Tim shakes his head, looking disappointed, Jason grumbles to himself under his breath.

"As if that stubborn brat would say anything.."

Dick stayed silent after that, no one had any idea what happened? Why was Damian so set to hide it?

Click

The sound of the front door opening was the only thing that pulled them all out of their thoughts, Damian stepping into the hallway of the manor, he wasn't visible yet, but his small footsteps could be heard against the wooden floor of the manor.

"Hey, Dami-"

Dick had called out gently to the boy, who hadn't even seemed to hear him, walking through the hallway past the doorway of the living room, his lips fallen in a small frown as his gaze watched the floor and lower parts of the walls, anywhere but up as he climbed the stairs.

Dick rather quickly fell silent, his words leaving him in that moment, Jason looked even more pissed if that was possible, and Tim looked utterly confused and frustrated, but Dick, just felt something well up in him, concern, worry.

What was happening? It wasn't unusual for Damian to ignore him, or anyone for that matter, but this was weird...

                                ★

Damian walked up the staircase like he had hundreds of times before, but this time felt wrong, so wrong.

Why was it wrong? This is how it was supposed to be, mother wanted you here, Damian, you want you here.

But the thoughts wouldn't leave his mind, of course he wanted to be here, he loved it here-

Loved?

When had that happened? He wasn't supposed to love anything.

He wasn't supposed to be like this, so why was he? Why did he have to be so soft recently? Mother would surely be so disappointed, grandfather would truly kill him...what about father? What would father think?

THUD

Damian's foot slipped from the step as he tumbled down, grabbing onto the railing, pulling his arm painfully as he held himself up with only the railing to help, Damian heard the shuffling in the living room, how could he not?

The way Grayson, or maybe, maybe, even Todd or Drake shot up to come over, but he couldn't face them at the moment, he couldn't let them know how foolish he was being.

Falling down the steps just because he was distracted, he knew better than that, he should know better than that.

He quickly pushed himself to his feet, rushing up to his room, it's not like he was hurt anyway, so it didn't matter.

Why would it matter?

He's fought through worse, he should be able to just walk through this, it was a fall, a stumble, nothing of importance, in the league it wouldn't have mattered, in fact he may have even been punished for it, for being imperfect, why were things so different here?

He didn't know what to do..it was all so different, he had been here long enough to be used to it, and he was, he was used to it but he couldn't be anymore, this was wrong, he was wrong, so, so wrong.

He was a failure, he was weak, he was something he shouldn't be, he was human, and oh, how scary that was...

Sat in front of the door, his bag dropping near him, his knees pulled up to his chest, he buried his face in his knees, his arms wrapped around himself.

Why was he doing this? It was pitiful, disgusting...if mother saw-

Mother wouldn't see, she didn't know, she couldn't know, he couldn't be punished if she never knew he was breaking a rule, it would be like all the other rules he's broken without her supervision.

No one could know about the weakness he was showing right now, it was pathetic, horrid, he was a terrible son, a terrible family member.

He was soiling the name of their family by being so weak, he wasn't supposed to be like this.

This isn't why he was born, he could never be a child, he had to be an heir.

A tear rolled down his cheek, falling and landing to the floor under him, he didn't cry loudly like most children his age do, it was silent, better that way.

But it wasn't best that way, he shouldn't be crying at all, he was not a child, he was an heir, he could not, even for a second risk falling that far.

Word count: 1422